Wild West Bob: A Yu-Gi-Oh! Saga(12/16: Sonic Duck duels!)

[Weather Report - Stand]

But who wouldn't want to fight a duck based after a crapp-ish card? Sonic Duck is a VERY important character.

[Guest Supreme Gamesmaster]

This is almost certainly the best chapter as a parody. The best chapter period...? That's up for debate.

[Weather Report - Stand]

In this story? OR THE WORLD?! But my favorite is actually eleven. It has cool. YOU'LL SEE... IN A WHILE! HA-HA~

[Kendo Fish]

Another chappyterr.

 

[spoiler=Cowboy Six][align=center]Chapter Six: Fire and Water!

Destined Matchup!

chapter by kendo fish[/align]

 

“Yeee-hawww!” Flamin’ Larry shouted half-heartedly. “I just panned myself some GOLD!!”

 

The other gold panners just stared at him. Enter West Lake in a fictional 19th-century West Town. Under its water was an alarming amount of gold.

 

Well, anyways, Larry had just panned himself a single, honest-to-goodness gold pebble. It wasn’t even a nugget. That’s how small it was.

 

A fellow gold panner with a pirate beard told him, “You’re not doin’ it right. Yer not pourin’ yer western soul into it. What are ya, Eastern?” the old man’s loose teeth quivered at the thought.

 

Larry started to sweat. This guy knew he wasn’t from here! “N-no way, y’all!” he lied.

 

Meanwhile...

 

Bob and Willie thought they had Sonic Duck in their clutches...but they looked around and he was somehow gone. "Dang!" The sheriff cursed his fate.

 

"Heh heh. Slippy fingers."

 

"Whatever that's supposed to mean..."

 

Back at the lake...

 

“Stop right there, Flamin’ Larry.” Wild West Bob skidded onto the scene dramatically. “Don’t be fooled, young panner. This guy’s from Japan.”

 

“I-I’m not young!”

 

“It’s not bad to be from another continent, but it’s bad to start duels without the other player’s consent. Not to mention tryin’ to steal our town is terrible in itself. Now, put ’cher Duel Disk up.”

 

“Wait!” Willie stormed into the area. “I need to do something important! Can I beautifully duel this criminal, Bob?”

 

“Hey, I know you!” Piratebeard realized. “You’re Beautiful, the legend from da Golden Stuff Pub -- I mean, Steakhouse – a-and you beat a girl!”

 

“Quiet, lad,” Bob demanded. “This is serious. Willie, you take care o’ this fiend.”

 

“Alright!” He whipped out his Duel Disk! “DUEL!” he cried.

 

“Wait -“

 

Willie: 4000 Life Points

Larry: 4000 Life Points

 

“- but HE just started a duel without MY consent!” Larry argyed.

 

“’S fine in the name of the law,” Bob clarified. Larry grumbled under his breath.

 

Willie drew six cards from his disk. They were Gagagigo, Aqua Spirit, Salvage, Nobleman of Crossout, Amphibious Bugroth MK-3 and Frostosaurus. Larry drew five cards. We don’t know what they are.

 

“I summon Gagagigo and end my turn!” A scrappy dinosaur with a heroic past appeared with a dramatic wave of Willie’s hand.

 

“Alright, then! I set four cards! END TURN!!” Three spells and/or traps and a monster were set, their images hovering above the rocks.

 

Willie drew theNeo Aqua Madoor. Hmm, I won’t be needing this, he thought. “I use the Nobleman of Crossout!” Wille cried, holding a card high above his head. From it leaped a knight from the land of Crossout, apparently. He jabbed an Ultimate Baseball Kid, who fell onto the ground like a rag doll. “Your baseball kid is finished..beautifully!”

 

“WHAT IS WITH YOU AND BEAUTIFUL!?!?!?” Larry shouted, annoyed. “Just for that, I use Spiritual Fire Art – Kurenai!” From his face-down trap arose Hiita the Fire Charmer, holding her hand out and chanting a spell in some weird Latin-like language. “I can tribute my Ultimate Baseball Kid so you lose Life Points equal to the card’s attack!”

 

“Wait, does that even work?”

 

“Uhhh…yyyeeeah.”

 

“Oh, okay. Just checkin’. Oh no! Nobleman!” The knight flew backwards into Willie, causing a fiery explosion. “Ow,” proclaimed Wille. (Willie, 3500 LP) “Well, now that that’s over, I’ll sacrifice my Gagagigo for Frostosaurus!” The lizard devolved into a scrappy brontosaurus with an icy past. It was made of ice, too. “Go! Glacial Rampage!”

 

“Roar,” the dino slowly moaned before running over Larry. The force of its hologram bashed 2600 Life Points into submission! Does that even make sense?

 

“Aah! A RAMPAGE!!!” (Larry, 1400 LP)

 

“End turn!”

 

“Heh heh.” Larry drew his card, then summoned it! “I summon UFO Turtle!” It was sort of a futuristic Pyramid Turtle, but it had no fancy beard. As a bonus, people could sit inside of its UFO shell and look out the windows! “Oops. I MEAN I SET IT!!!!!!”

 

“That’s pretty stupid of you to do,” remarked Willie. “Think out your turn beautifully.

 

“RRRGGHH!!!!!!!!!! NO MORE BEAUTIFUL!!!!! I’M GONNA BEAT YOU FOR SURE!!!!!!!!!!!!”

 

UFO Turtle comprehended what Larry had told him. A card crushed him into the ground, thus making him unseeable.

 

“Well…I also activate Backfire!” A guy who liked to chop and a flamin’ log person appeared. “Whenever you destroy a Fire guy, you ALSO lose 500 Life Points!!”

 

“Willie, watch out!” Bob warned.

 

“You go, Beautiful!” Piratebeard cheered.

 

“Your turn, Willie,” Larry said with a smirk.

 

His opponent nodded, then drew a card. It was the Amphibian Beast! “I summon Aqua Spirit by removing Gagagigo from play!” Thought he was gonna use Amphibian Beast somehow, huh? Anyways, a little blue girl appeared on the field. For no apparent reason, she was giggling as she made a drop of water levitate lust above her hands. “And JUST TO MAKE YOU HAPPY, I’ll do what I would have done, had you not revealed your turtle.”

 

“…BOOOOO!!” Piratebeard booed.

 

“Frostosaurus, attack! Glacial Rampage!” The ice dino stepped all over the turtle, causing to retreat into his unidentified flying object-of-a-shell. He then spiraled away.

 

“YOU’VE ACTIVATE BACKFIRE!!!!!!!!!!” Chopman the Desperate Outlaw said “Chop chop chop!” and sliced Blazing Inpachi in two. As he did, fire erupted in Willie’s face.

 

“Aah! Fire!” (Willie, 3000 LP) “Why me but not him?” he said, pointing to the weird green Chopman.

 

“And with UFO Turtle’s effect, I can summon Solar Flare Dragon from my deck!” The UFO swirled back down and opened again to reveal an oriental dragon. The dragon zigzagged out, radiating with solar energy! “And you’re not just gonna kill this thing in one shot! ‘Cause I activate Gravity Bind!” All of a sudden, every monster on the field fell over. Not Chopman and Blazing Inpachi, though. They were still upright.

 

“Ow…okay…I end my turn,” Willie declared.

 

“Heh heh, heh!” Larry drew his card and used it! “I use Fissure! I can destroy your Aqua Spirit!” Aqua Spirit tripped on her dress and fell into an endless abyss.

 

“My beautiful card! Nooo!” Willie sure had a passion for fashion -- I mean, those cards.

 

“Solar Flare Dragon!” Larry held out his hand in a cool fashion. “Defense Position!”

 

“Rehh.” The dragon stopped wriggling rapidly. Apparently, that’s all it took.

 

“Now I summon Ultimate Baseball Kid! Again!” Another child stepped onto the field…and he was ready to play some baseball! He had some really advanced gear for his time. Fire burned in his eyes…pure passion for the game. It was definitely clear that under that scarf, he was also wearing his game face.

 

“Whudduz this kid think e’s doin’?” Piratebeard wondered aloud. “IT’S A CARD GAME, NOT A BASEBALL GAME!!!!! Thazzit! I’m goin’ fer Beautiful again.”

 

“But I’m not done!” Larry smirked. “Now I remove my UFO Turtle from play to summon…Spirit of Flames!!” From the depths of somewhere emerged a certain dude, gritting his teeth in rage. Fire blazed in his wake.

 

A spirit to match his spirit! Bob thought, even though Aqua Spirit was already killed.

 

“And don’t forget,” he continued, “with every other Fire guy I have on the field, the Baseball Kid gains 1000 attack!” Indeed, with every card he’d summoned, the fire in the kid’s eyes had grown more intense. Combined with his original 500 attack, he now had 2500! ”BUT just in case, I’ll end my turn without using his other effect to destroy one of my monsters and deal Direct Damage.” Using that just to deal 500 damage, he pondered, might leave me open to an attack by…uhh…Mad Lobster. That lobster’s all the rage these days. “Oh yeah, forgot to mention. At the end of my turn, Solar Flare dragon does 500 damage to your Life Points.”

 

Bob gasped. I’ve never heard Larry so calm and certain of victory before!

 

Heat radiated from the dragon’s fur, making Willie feel warm and fuzzy inside! “Aah! I feel warm!” (Willie, 2500 LP) “Well…it’s my turn.” He drew his Penguin Soldier! Willie smiled on the inside. “I set a card and end my turn.” The penguin lied dormant as a face-down card. Would Larry attack, or would he keep relying on his dragon?

 

Larry drew his next card. “I summon Volcanic Blaster!” A little black machine that looked like some sort of a camera appeared. Or was it a laser shooter? Either way, Ultimate Baseball Kid smiled, his passion still growing. “And now that my kid has 3500 ATK, I’ll destroy Frostosaurus! Attack! Home Run!”

 

The Spirit of Flames was on the pitcher’s mound, throwing Frostosaurus through the air and straight at the kid. Ultimate Baseball Kid then struck the dino so hard with his bat, holographic fire came out! Aside from burning through Frostosaurus’ entire body, the force of the impact had sent his remains flying over a mountainside. A mysterious announcer voice shouted, “Home run!” as Solar Flare Dragon and Volcanic Blaster made their way around what was apparently a baseball diamond.

 

“Frostosaurus!” (Willie, 1600 LP)

 

“STOP saying the names of your departed monsters!! I end this turn.” (Willie, 1100 LP) That wiggly dragon had done some more damage.

 

“Curse that gravity!” Willie said as he drew his next card, a Mystical Space Typhoon. “Hm. I activate Mystical Space Typhoon! Using its effect, I’ll destroy your Gravity Bind!” A tornado spiraled down from space and made gravity normal again. All of the higher-level monsters had the strength to stand - or wriggle - slightly upright. “And I flip up -- Penguin Soldier!” A noble swordspenguin was revealed! He slashed Spirit of Flames and Solar Flare Dragon so hard in their heads that they toppled over into Flamin’ Larry’s hand.

 

“Smart move!” congratulated Piratebeard.

 

“That’s what I’d expect from his third favorite card.” Bob played with his hat a little, but it looked cool, ‘cause he was a cowboy.

 

“And Amphibian Beast is my sixth favorite! I’ll sacrifice my beautiful soldier for it.” Penguin Soldier started to have a heart attack, as usual! But then, from below West Lake, a man with green scales and webbed limbs came to the rescue! The penguin died too soon…and Amphibian Beast was very angry, to be non-descriptive. Now the people would think he killed the penguin…! “Now,” Willie continued, “I’ll attack……….V-volcanic Blaster!” The beast roared and dragged the four-legged camera into the river, along with the deceased penguin. It short-circuited, as seen by the small electric bolts emanating from the waters. As the baseball kid’s comrades were getting killed and sent away right in front of him, he lost his passion for the game, making his ATK revert back to zero...

 

“Bad move.” (Larry, 200 LP)

 

“Well, you’ve lost more Life Points, at least…turn end!”

 

Larry drew his next card with a rather large smile. The only cards in his hand were Solar Flare Dragon, Spirit of Fflames and -- Last Will! That card would be especially useless. “I remove Volcanic Blaster from play to summon Spirit of Flames, and I summon Solar Flame Dragon in attack mode! Now, baseball Kid, attack! Home Run!” Again, Spirit of Flames made the pitch, this time cramming Amphibian Beast into a concentrated ball. Then the kid scored, and the ball hit Willie’s face, doing a whoppin’ 100 damage.

 

“Ow.” (Willie, 1500 LP)

 

“And now for the finishing blow! Solar Flare Dragon, attack! Solar ‘Splosion!” The dragon cackled as it flew straight into Willie’s face, resulting in a massive explosion of holographic proportions. Gold panners stared in awe.

 

“I failed.....” (Willie, 0 LP)

 

“I WON!!!!!” Larry shouted, golden pebble in his fingertips. He ran away somewhere. It was obvious he was running to the visible cemetery, though.

 

“Let’s go get that Larry.” Bob took out his deck, as if they hadn’t even started chasing after Larry in the first place and were just now getting ready. It slipped from his grip and fell into the lake! “Ohhh, no.....now, don’t worry, I’ll get a new copy at home. I have a spare.”

 

“But Bob, this is beautifully urgent!” Willie shook his shoulder irritatingly. “I’m not in my dueling spirit! Who’s gonna fight Zombie Bill?”

 

Bob paused. He took an old style telephone from his pocket, its cord stretching all the way back home.

 

“You had that phone in your pocket all this time?”

 

“And you didn’t notice it?”

 

“Nor did I!” Piratebeard said.

 

“Go back to gold pannin’, lad. It’s what’s best for you.”

 

“But-uh-ah-“ Piratebeard shrugged and did as he was told.

 

Bob dialed his own number, then put the phone on the ground. Big Bad Baby Boy answered. “Hello?”

 

“You’re getting’ better at answerin’ the phone! Not to mention getting more literate! Done anything stupid?”

 

“Uhhhh...” He was covered in cuts and his mouth was crammed with food. “Maybeh?”

 

“Good, you’re honest. Could ya come down to the graveyard and beat a criminal at a card game?”

 

“What if ah don’t?” the baby snapped.

 

“Then I’ll beat you in a card game.”

 

“Okay, ah’m comin’.” The baby hung up.

 

“Bob,” Willie asked, “if your son is at home, why didn’t you ask him to bring your spare deck?”

 

The sheriff tipped his dramatically, saying, “He needs to learn his dueling skills.”

 

“Uh, okay, beautifully.”

 

TO BE CONTINUED...

 

[spoiler=Commentary]

Commentary

 

Rremember, most non-Westerners are not bad. It’s just Larry, and...yeah.

 

Wild West Bob is becoming irresponsible. Giving the job of capturing a hardened outlaw to his less-than-two-years-old son? That’s just too much...ORISIT!?!?

 

If Penguin Soldier is Willie’s third favorite card, you may ask what his first, second and so on are. You’ll find out someday...ORWILLYOU!?!?

 

Look out for the “exciting” and “mind-boggling” conclusion to this mini-arc soon!

 

[align=center][Today’s Featured Card:]

Frostosaurus[/align]

 

[spoiler=Next Cowboy...][align=center]NEXT COWBOY

 

Finally, the stage is set to capture the DASTARDLY Zombie Bill!! But who gets to fight him? Recently-humiliated Willie? Stereotypical Bob? Yeah, probably him. It COULDN’T be Big Bad Baby Boy. BUT... Zombie Bill’s new booster packs he bought with that stolen gold are rarin’ and ready to go... and kick butt!

 

Next Cowboy: Cowboy Seven! Coming of Age Duel! Baby Versus Zombie!

 

It’s definitely not Big Bad Baby Boy who’s being referenced here!![/align]

 

 

[Weather Report - Stand]

New chapter tomorrow night. Yee-Haw.

[Weather Report - Stand]

[spoiler=Cowboy Seven][align=center]Cowboy Seven: Coming-of-Age Duel!

Baby Versus Zombie!

Chapter by Weather Report[/align]

 

“Huff, huff,” Flamin’ Larry huffed, “I think I’ve lost’em.” Zombie Bill was taking a nap next to corn mentioned during his last duel.

“What took you so long?” he asked. “I got so tired of waiting that I fell asleep. Plus a duck appeared.” Zombie Bill held up Sonic Duck.

“Quah.”

“Well Bill, I got you a gold pebb—whazzuh—SONIC DUCK!!” He and Sonic Duck ran to give each other a hug, but Larry punched him away. “WHAT TOOK YOU SO LONG?! To find me.”

“QUAAAACK?!” Sonic Duck gasped.

Bill looked at both of them in a funny fashion. “What’s with you people?”

Larry sat down. “It’s a long story.”

“I have time.”

“So you know about that railroad you guys built across the Pacific Ocean all the way to Asia?”

“No.”

“Along the way, Sonic Duck tried to look out the window but stupidly fell into the ocean. Luckily, he knew I was going to West Town. I know him since he’s been my lackey since I met him three long years ago.”

“That was short, actually.” Bill noted. Then something hit him in his mind. “You stink so badly at dueling that you can only beat a DUCK?!”

“Q-q-q-quaaaah?!” Sonic Duck exclaimed oddly.

“Don’t listen to him, Sonic Duck! I beat some guy with a water deck earlier!”

 

“Wait, wait wait.” Bill ordered. “Was there… a guy with a pirate hat… with the water guy?”

“And a bearded guy! Why?”

Bill’s heart began pounding. His pulse raced. His eyes grew with fear. “THE GUY WITH THE BEEEEEEARD?!” Then he stopped himself. “What I mean to say is…” Then he pulled Larry closer by the collar.

“Woah, leggo!”

“You. Just. Dueled. In. Front. Of. Wild. West. Bob. Hm?”

“Oh, that guy. Ha.” Lary shakily giggled. “I last dueled him months ago. I tried to take over then, too, ha. I escaped, but he CAN’T be following me. I lost’m.”

“Or DID you?” asked a familiar voice!

“GASP!” They all gasped! But Sonic Duck said ‘Quack’. Just so you know.

 

They turned and faced… the old gravedigger man. He was piling dirt over a coffin. “I was just implyin’ that he MAY know where you are.”

“Um… your opinion holds no ground, so I’ll pay no attention.”

“Fine, I’ll just go back to shovelin’ the earth… LOOK OVER THERE!!”

“Gaah!!”

“Heheh, just foolin’. But seriously, look over yonder.” Before he trudged off, the gravedigger pointed northward. Bob, Willie, and Big Bad Baby Boy were there!

“BIIIIILL!!” Bob yelled!

“YOU LET HIM FOLLOW YOU, IDIOT!” Bill yelled!

“So that duck was working for Larry ALL ALONG?!” Willie yelled!

“Who’s that baby?” Larry yelled.

“Well…” Bob patted BBBB’s hat. “This here’s my adoptive son. He’s gonna beat you, Bill, and send you to jail for stealing gold.”

“Quack quah!” Sonic Duck quacked.

“That’s right, a BABY can’t play a card game!” Larry laughed. Sonic Duck was sad and misunderstood.

“If ah ‘kin talk, ah ‘kin duel!” BBBB said. Everybody who didn’t know him gasped!

 

Bill stepped in front of him. “Anybody raised by Bob HAS to be good. I’ll play you. Then I’ll make my getaway.” Zombie Bill cracked his knuckles and took out his duel disk at the same time as BBBB.

“DUEL!”

Bill: 4000 Life Points

BBBB: 4000 Life Points

“Ah’m a goin’ first, on account a mah age!” Baby Boy drew his six cards. They were Human-Wave Tactics, Pyramid Turtle, Card Trader, Ojamagic, Polymerization and The Lady in Wight. “Ah set two cards an’ activate Card Trader!” Some creepy guy in a top hat, half of a mask and a cloak appeared near a Trap/Spell and a monster.

“Tee hee!” he laughed creepily.

“Ah end!”

“Hmph.” Bill drew his cards.

“That’s my adoptive boy!” Bob sighed, wiping away a single tear.

 

“I activate Heavy Storm! Hya ha! It destroys all Spells and Traps on the field!”

“Noooooooes!” screamed Card Trader in his death throes. He blew up. Then Ojamagic flipped up!

“Ha! Yew jus’ activated mah ability! When Ojamagic’s destroyed, ah add the three Ojamas into mah hand!”

Three annoying guys flew out of the card into BBBB’s hand (although he still had to take the cards out of his deck).

“I’m not done yet, obviously. I Summon Zombie Master!” A master of zombies appeared! “Attack the monster! Zombie Power!!”

Zombie Master punched the face-down card with the power of weak, decaying, dead bodies. Skull Servant flipped up and crumbled away!

“Mah Skull Servant?!” BBBB gasped.

“What a stupid baby! He uses Skull Servant?!” Larry playfully asked. “What kind of loser uses such a useless card?”

“Quack quack!!”

“That’s right! A loser that loses!” Then Willie punched Larry.

“Don’t make fun of babies! They don’t know any better than to put such things in their mouths!!”

“SHADDAP! I’m tryin’ to watch my son duel!” Bob ordered.

 

“Mah turn. Ah activate Polehmerehzation!” BBBB held out his three irritating monsters and Polymerization. “Ah fuse Ojama Yellow, Green n’ Black together ‘ta form Ojama King in Defense Mode!” A gigantic, white, egg-shaped speedo-wearin’ irritatin’ king appeared.

“Hey guys how’s it goin’?” he asked.

“UGH! It’s so ugly!” groaned Bill, coughing out blood. “And he’s irritating, to boot!”

“He ain’t just ugleh, he also takes up three a’ your monster spaces!”

Three irritating monster tokens appeared on Bill’s side of the field. “Now you ‘kin only Summon one more monster! Ah set one more monster ‘n a Spell-slash-Trap card! End turn!”

“Look, my boy can DUEL!” Bob gleefully yelled! “I was five when I could first Summon such irritating monsters!”

“Beautiful play, kid!” Willie shouted!

“Thanks, y’all! Yer words ‘a praise fill me with power, ah guess.”

 

Bill drew his next card. “You’re about to face the fury of… the booster packs I just bought with that stolen gold.”

“SO YOU ADMIT IT!” screamed Bob.

“With Zombie Master’s ability, I can discard a monster to Special Summon a Zombie from EITHER Graveyard. I discard Spirit Reaper to Special Summon Skull Servant from YOUR Graveyard.” And alas, the skeleton teleported onto Bill’s field! “Then I sacrifice him for the Secret-Rare Jinzo I got today!” Skull Servant exploded, and a man in a tacky-but-green suit and face-hiding mask appeared! His head looked like some sort of brain tumor. “Now your possible Trap Card is useless! And Jinzo attacks your monster with Psycho Shock!”

“Whadda ya mean mah Trap’s useless?” BBBB asked naively.

“Jinzo negates all Traps, duh.”

“Oh.” Jinzo held out a finger and pointed it at the face-down monster!

“JINZONINGEN – SAIKO SHOKKA.” he grunted in a robotic, Japanese voice. Jinzo’s target was revealed to be the Lady in Wight, an old skeleton lady! She was crushed by a large psychic energy blast!

“Why, I never!” she cried in an English-lady voice.

“End turn.”

“You’ve got this in the BAG!” Larry cheered!

 

“Ah set one monster ‘n end turn.”

Bill drew his next card with extreme certainty of winning. If I get rid of that irritating fatty, I can win. I’ll just free up some space for when I draw Snatch Steal! “Jinzo, Psycho Shock!”

He yet again summoned some crazy energy with his finger and fired it at the monster. It was Pyramid Turtle!

“Since you killed mah Pyramid Turtle, ah get ‘ta Summon another Skull Servant!” Pyramid Turtle exploded, sending pyramid bricks in all directions, and a Skull Servant appeared where the Turtle once was.

“Ya ha.” it laughed.

“Zombie Power!” Zombie Master punched Skull Servant into oblivion! “Now I’ll end my turn.”

“Mah turn!” BBBB smiled at his next monster. “Yeah! Ah summon King ‘a da Skull Servants in Attack Mode!” The ultimate weakest monster appeared! Three small flares hovered around him. “He gains one-towsan’ Attack for evereh Skull Servant in mah Graveyard. Includin’ Ladeh in Wight!”

“Say what?” Bill asked.

“Ladeh in Wight counts s a Skull Servant ‘cuz her ability sez so! Now, Kill Zombeh Master! Weak Attack!”

“Nyar har!” the king cruelly laughed! He wimpily slapped Zombie Master into an explosion!

“Ow!” Bill yelled. (Bill: 2800 Life Points) “But… why didn’t you kill Jinzo?”

“Ah dunno,” BBBB said.

“Stupid baby!” Larry called.

“He’s not stupid!” Bob yelled in defense!

“He’s setting up a beautiful combo!” Willie roared!

They’re right, thought BBBB. Nex’ turn ah’ll equip King with Opti-Camouflage Armor. Then I’ll attack fer game! “Ah reckon ah’ll en’ mah turn here.” he sighed. Just play dum an they’ll never see it comin’…

 

“Heart of the cards, give me a good card!” Bill chanted!

“What heart?”

“Quack? Quah quack.”

“Boss, cards DON’T have hearts.”

“Boss? Hm, just today you’ve pledged your allegiance to me any you’ve already accepted it. Anyhoo…” Bill slowly drew a card. “YESSSSSS! I activate Book of Life! Oh, and Card of Safe Return.” A green book and some floating cards appeared. “I can Special Summon a Zombie from my Graveyard and remove one of YOUR monsters from YOUR Graveyard from play!”

“Darnit!” BBBB cursed! The book opened up and glowed!

“I Summon Zombie Master and remove Skull Servant! Now I draw a card for Card of Safe Return!” Zombie Master leaped off the pages of the book and Skull Servant was pulled in! And Bill drew a card.

“Oh no!” Willie gasped! “KOSS only has 2000 Attack Points now!” One fire went out.

“Wait… I GOT IT!!” Bob screamed! “When you first used Book of Life against me, nothing happened! Now there’s a hologram graphic! What gives?”

“I got this Jinzo and Book from a reprint pack where they fixed some glitched up cards or just gave them completely new graphics! Cool, huh?’ Bill asked.

“Darn, he’s right, it IS cool…” Bob grunted.

“Apparently Jinzo’s old attack was a punch, but they wanted to change that.”

“That’s perfectly reasonable.”

“Serves you right!” Larry yelled.

“Anyways, here’s the THIRD awesome card I got today: I tribute Zombie Master for Kuraz, the Light Monarch!!” Zombie Master exploded and an awesome, brightly armored king appeared through the smoke! “When he’s summoned by any means, I can destroy any two cards on the field and the owner draws a card for each one! But he can’t attack that turn. Now, Holy Burst on Ojama King and Skull Servant guy!”

“Dat’s KING a da Skull Servants!”

“Whatever!”

Kuraz held up his arms and two orbs of light energy appeared, circling the field. Then they froze and fired huge lasers at the chosen monsters! Finally, the orbs disappeared and the two kings were engulfed in a huge explosion!!

“Yeowch!”

“Aaaargh!” They blew up! Then the irritating monsters on Bill’s field imploded.

“Now, Jinzo, attack this guy! Psycho Shock!”

“JINZONINGEN – SAIKO SHOKKA.” BOOM! BBBB was hit by a CRUSHING HOLOGRAM!!

“GYAAAAAH!!” (BBBB: 1600 Life Points) “Dang! I draw mah cards now.” He drew Graceful Charity and Ojama Green.

“Go ahead, it’s your turn now.” Bill laughed.

“Quack quah quah quack quack!” Sonic Duck taunted!

“You said a mouthful!” Larry said.

“You can do it, Big Bad! I know it!” Willy turned to Bob. “Come on, Bob. Cheer for your son! Adoptive son.”

“Why should I?”

“What?! That’s incredibly un-beauti—“

“Do you think that he needs MY help to win?” Bob sternly answered. “He’s strong and will not lose to that zombie, at least not without a fight.”

BBBB and Willie were surprised. Willie got quiet and BBBB began his assault.

 

The scenery got a lot darker and the only things illuminated were the people and cards. “What happened?” Bill asked.

“It got… DRAMATIC.” Bob smiled.

BBBB drew in slow motion. He slapped Graceful Charity onto the field! “Ah use Graceful Charity!” An angel appeared, holding several trading cards. She began bouncing them around in her hands.

“Hee hee, hee hee, whoops!” She suddenly dropped the cards and three new ones appeared in BBBB’s hand.

“Ah draw three cards and discard two.” He discarded Ojama Green and the Lady in Wight.

The angel suddenly got more trading cards! “Yay!” she cheered before exploding.

“And ah Summon King ‘a da Skull Servants!”

“Hahaaaa…” The king tensed up and released four fires!! “Ha HAA!!”

“Aa equip’m with Opti-Camoflage Armor.” He was suddenly dressed up in a rediculous chameleon-themed suit of armor. But it didn’t matter HOW weird it looked, since he turned invisible! “When equipped to a level one monster, it can attack directleh!”

“OH SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIP!!” Bill screamed!

 

“ATTACK’M DIRECTLEH!! WEAK ATTACK!!”

“Ha, ya!” The King turned invisible and suddenly slapped Zombie Bill into submission!

“It doesn’t hurt but it shoooooooooould!!” he screamed in ‘pain’!

 

(Bill: 0 Life Points. GAME OVER)

 

“Tch!” Bill grunted. Then BBBB placed handcuffs on him.

“Yer’ goin’ ta jail,” he said.

“NOOOOOES!” Bill complained! “Curses, foiled by a baby!”

“Your sentence is three weeks in the hoosegow.” Bob smiled. “And Larry, for YOUR previous crimes…”

“Yeep!” Larry picked up Sonic Duck. “Don’t worry, boss! I’ll get you great cards!”

“Quaaack!!” They escaped.

“Wait, losers… what’s the use…” Bob began pushing Bill into town.

“Willie, take BBBB home for me. I’ll be there soon.”

“Alright, Bob.” Willie obeyed. “That was a beautiful game, Big Bad. You had control the whole time.”

“T’ain’t nothin’,” he said.

As Bob n’ Bill trudged into town, Bill finally said, “Your kid sure is something.”

“My adoptive kid is the best I could dream for.”

[spoiler=Commentary]

COMMENTARY

 

Wow, it kinda got… SERIOUS at the end, there… soon we’ll be starting the next story arc, and this one’s gonna be big. A lot of battles and AN ACTUAL PLOT surface. Anyways, about this chapter…

 

This was a relatively simple game to plan out, the basic layout of BBBB’s deck is an Ojama-Skull hybrid, where Ojamas fill the field while Skull Servant does the heavy damage (or the king at least). BUT WAIT!!

 

Kuraz the Light Monarch. He stands for all things Christian (I suppose). But his card ID is 57666217. Nothing odd about that, right? I’ll write it again for you:

57666217. AAAARGH, THE EVIL NUMBER! Is Kuraz good or evil? Both?! LIGHT ISN’T NESSESARILY GOOD AND DARKNESS ISN’T ALWAYS EVIL. Live with this knowledge and let it consume you. Ta ta~

 

[spoiler=Today's Featured Card:][align=center]TODAY'S FEATURED CARD:

Ojama Green?!

 

[spoiler=NEXT COWBOY][align=center]NEXT COWBOY

 

Big Bad Baby Boy spends a day at Yu-Gi-Oh Park…with Flamin’ Larry as his guardian! What crazy shenanigans will they and Twin Long Rods #2 get into!?!?

 

Find out next time on Wild West Bob!

 

Chapter Eight: Dreams of a Magician! Day at Yu-Gi-Oh Park![/align]

 

 

Pure ownage, brought to you by a baby.

[Kaisu]

YAY!

Another CowBoy!

This one's great, but poor Sonic Duck...

[Weather Report - Stand]

He's one of the best characters in the entire story.

[Kaisu]

Huh.

Actually, BBBB has a pretty great deck.

[Weather Report - Stand]

If only people used Solemn Judgement in this world, since in the card playing dimensions thay NEVER play THAT card(points to EVERY yugioh anime that forsales awesome cards like that).

[Kaisu]

Solemn Judgement?

That's the card that leads Winged Kuribroh to it's downfall on YGO5Ds SDAR

[Weather Report - Stand]

BUMP

[eyeofthedeck]

This fic is awesome! Can't wait for the next cowboy and the first actual story arc!

[Weather Report - Stand]

Yes, it shall start in about three filler episodes. If you ever want a Kendo chapter faster, plague her with PMs begging for it, because I'm apparently not repeatedly asking her OVER AND OVER AGAIN enough.

[Kendo Fish]

But lo, 'tis completed.

[spoiler=Cowboy Eight][align=center]Cowboy Eight: Dreams of a Magician!

Day at Yu-Gi-Oh Park!

chapter by kendo fish[/align]

 

Back at the graveyard, Flamin' Larry was relaxing at Bill's spooky cottage. It was comfy, and just about the same as it ever was. The only real change he made to it was putting the crocheted image of a kitten on the wall, over a desk. Currently Larry was looking at some cards he'd dueled out of some guy named Bobo illegally. They were all bad, though.

 

Someone knocked thrice on the door. "Flamin' Larry," Bob ordered, "come out here."

 

Larry put down a Garnecia Elefantis card and opened the door. "How'd YOU find me!?"

 

"Since you haven't bought a house, I figured you'd be here."

 

"Well, if you're here to arrest me, go ahead, yeah." Larry didn't seem to care whether he was arrested or not.

 

"Do you...want to be arrested?" Bob asked, confused. Wasn't Larry the type to fight back and persevere?

 

"Yes -- I MEAN NO!!"

 

"Well, if you do me a favor I"ll drop yer charges. How's that sound?"

 

"I'LL TAKE IT!!!!!" Larry was ecstatic!

 

"Take my son to the park."

 

".....WHAAAAAT!?!?!? THAT'S ALL!?"

 

"Yep."

 

"...YOU'RE SO IRRESPONSIBLE!!!!!"

 

"I-I have a lotta work to do."

 

"Really. Like what?"

 

"Like...lookin' over the town-"

 

"Yeah, right. And whittling stuff with your whittling knife."

 

"You be quiet or you'll be in jail with Bill."

 

"Alright, ALRIGHT!! Just tell me, which park IS this we're talking about?"

 

"There's a Yu-Gi-Oh-themed park. 'S called...Yu-Gi-Oh Park."

 

What a straightforward and obvious name! Larry thought. "Okay, I'll do it. Don't expect me to be there for long," he grumbled.

 

"Okayhereyago." Bob threw Big Bad Baby Boy into Flamin' Larry's arms.

 

"Hey!" the baby yelled.

 

"Bring back my adoptive son in one piece, or else!" Bob tossed him a briefcase and slammed the door shut.

 

"Yeah, yeu better!" Big Bad warned. "Now put meh down!"

 

"Fine, fine, fine." Larry put him on the ground, picking up the important-looking briefcase. "To Yu-Gi-Oh Park."

 

"Ah've nevuh been to da park befo'. Hurreh up'n go alreadeh!" BBBB didn't take very kindly to the idea of going to the park with a dangerous outlaw. Flamin' Larry sighed and closed the cottage door behind them.

 

It wasn't a long walk to Yu-Gi-Oh Park, only about a mile. For a park in the Old West it was pretty advanced, with mechanical rides and other machines. Of course it wasn't surprisingly so, seeing as they had duel disks and holograms already. As one approached the entrance they would be greeted by a large reading "Yu-Gi-Oh! Park". A bunch of of yellow lights flashed on and off on the wooden painted sign, which was nearly fifteen meters long.

 

"Well," Larry said, sighing again, "what about that sign, uh...it's long, uh...you know? It's, you know...big, right?"

 

"...Quit sighin' a'fore everythin' or ah'll cut mahself," BBBB warned, holding a deadly knife. On closer inspection it was Bob's whittling knife, its wood handle reading "Property of BOB"!

 

"ALRIGHT, alright, alright." If Big Bad cut himself not only would he be held responsible for not keeping him in one piece, he would also be accused of stealing! That dastardly baby! he thought, almost snarling.

 

As they walked by the ticket booth, Larry gave the booth person one of his many new Garnecia Elefantis cards. Turns out it was worth two tickets. "Thank you, and have a Yu-Gi-riffic day," the young man behind the glass said as he gave them thin strips of paper. Like Larry, he was very unmotivated.

 

Just past the entrance to the park stood some guys in creepy monster-themed uniforms, who slowly moved in for the hug: Dorover, Twin Long Rods #2, The Wandering Doomed, Tyhone and Kuriboh.

 

"Wow! A REAL Skull Servant!" Big Bad cried, running into the green-cloaked corpse's arms. The freaky, realistic skeleton patted him on the back with a sympathetic-yet-disturbing smile.

 

Dorover, covered in real blue slime, smiled and wobbled over to Larry. With a glance at his five eyes Larry cringed, pushing him over onto his back. In a muffled voice the guy in the costume screamed, flailing his legs around and begging for help. Just as Larry thought he was safe, Twin Long Rods #2 came for him! "AAH!" he yelled somewhat blandly, running away from the big-toothed purple monster. In front of him skidded Tyhone, a tube-mouthed poor excuse for a dragon. Perhaps most disturbing about it was the fact that within its mouth there was...a human head!

 

"Hug me!" tempted Tyhone. As the head moved its lips he backed away, only to fall right into the tentacles of Twin Long Rods #2.

 

"HUG MEEEEE!!!!!" it howled, like a wolf howling eerily at the moon.

 

"Let's go! Before Kuriboh catches us!" Larry struggled out of Twin Long Rods #2's deadly grip and pulled Big Bad by the hand. They rushed into a nearby tent-booth, striped blue-and-white. They didn't care which tent it was. They only hoped that the monsters wouldn't get in. He smashed the drapes closed around Kuriboh's green hand, provoking a chilling screech before the thing pulled itself out.

 

"Welcome!" The peppy voice only further frightened them.

 

"WHAH!!" Larry jumped.

 

"Let meh hug Skull Servant!" BBBB tugged at his vest.

 

"NO! That wasn't Skull Servant...that was The Wandering Doomed!"

 

The baby gasped! "Dat impostor!"

 

"...I said welcome!"

 

"AAAUGH!!" Larry dropped a bunch of Garnecia Elefantis cards and an Adhesive Trap Hole.

 

Suddenly candles were lit, illuminating the room ever-so-slightly which was bigger on the inside than it was on the outside. Sitting on a small orange rug was Jenny the Magician, sporting a big smile. "Welcome to the tent of I, Magician of Faith! I can duel, but I can also read palms! Palmreadingsarefiftycents. And by the way, the tone should start getting more light-hearted now since you're away from those frightening monsters!"

 

"Cheap...person!"

 

"Duels are for free!"

 

"Larreh! I wanna see yeu duel 'er! Dew it...uh...or ah'll cut mahself!" Big Bad demanded.

 

"Fine. DUEL!!"

 

"Uh-"

 

Larry: 4000 Life Points

Jenny: 4000 Life Points

 

Larry drew Great Angus, Spirit of Flames, Molten Destruction, Fissure, Dust Tornado and Ultimate Baseball Kid. "I'll summon GRRREAT Angus!!" he growled, ripping out his duel disk as if he were revving up his soul. It seemed like a duel was just what he needed to get motivated.

 

"Rah! Rah! Rah! Rah!" A pig-nosed red pig appeared, and he wouldn't stop talking.

 

"And I'll SET a card. Then I'll activate Molten Destruction!"

 

"A volcano appears and makes your guys stronger, right?" Jenny piped in.

 

"Yeah, pretty much." A small volcano appeared in the room, between the two duelists. Lava spewed out onto the pig guy, making him talk faster and become even more bothersome. "Your turn," Larry smirked.

 

"My draw!" Jenny drew Royal Magical Library, Brain Control, Skilled Dark Magician, Dust Tornado, Pitch-Black Power Stone and Mage Power. "I summon the Skilled Daaark Muhgician!" The magician tried to look serious, but he saw his shoes were untied and bent down to re-tie them.

 

BBBB laughed. "Tyin' shoos? What kinduh ZANY muhgishin does DAT?" he questioned.

 

"He's just stupid," Larry answered bluntly.

 

"No, he's not! I set two spells and/or traps! I also activate Mage Power!" Some guys appeared around her magician, chanted a spell, then walked away. "My magician goes from 1900 attack to 3400!" the magician looked down, saw that his shoes were tied, and then struck a pose.

 

"But even if you win the battle, YOU'LL LOSE THE DUEL!!"

 

"Not nehsuhsehruleh."

 

"Uhh...what?"

 

"Nevuh mind." Big Bad frowned, knowing for the first time what it was like to be truly misunderstood...

 

"Brain Control!"

 

"What?!" Larry was caught off-guard.

 

"I pay 800 Life Points and get your monster for the turn!" (Jenny, 3200 Life Points) She waved her hands around.

 

"RAHRAHrah...rah..." Great Angus slowed down the pace of his words and joined the two spellcasters. As he came, he also rejoiced by cheering, "RAhahahah! RAH!!"

 

"And because Great Angus has 2300 Attack, I can basically kill you! Whoops! You're not supposed to say that in front of the kids!"

 

"Ah alreaheh know what deaf is!"

 

"WAIT!!!!! I use Dust Tornado and destroy Mage Power!" A wave of dust and feathers blew over Skilled Dark Magician's shoe, untying it.

 

"Aw," the fat-sounding guy whined.

 

"I can still make you faint! Attack! Skilled Dark Magic Attack! Crazy Pig Shot!"

 

As he performed the attack, Skilled Dark Magician's shoelace spontaneously combusted so he couldn't fully charge the shot. Still shouting somehow, Great Angus opened his mouth wide to reveal several volleys of missiles! These two attacks combined created a spectacular explosion!

 

"That's game over!" (Larry, 0 Life Points)

 

""Dat was short!" Big Bad argued.

 

"Too bad! Cut yourself and I'll kill you!!" Larry put away his disk somewhere. "Anyways, Jenny, I've heard of you. You're the girl who lost to...Beautiful," he grumbled through the word, "right?"

 

"Well, yeah! But please don't call me Jenny around the kids, it ruins their childhood!"

 

"Mah childhood's not ruined!"

 

"If you're a magician, then why is the best you can do palm reading and why are you sitting in this amusement park tent all day?"

 

"Well," Jenny recounted, "my family's had a history with Yu-Gi-Oh Park." Her voice sounded solemn, for once. "My dad was a juggler, my mother a famous magician. Of course I wanted to learn magic, too, but more than that I have always wanted to be...a weather forecaster. Since that battle, nobody's taken me seriously and I've lost my job. So, I guess it's best just to return to my family roots and go to the only place I CAN work....."

 

"I it's because of your stupid voice."

 

"Shut up!" In a split second the two were teleported outside of the tent, where the freaky costumes lurked, waiting for them...and before either of them had time to react, Kuriboh came straight at them, looking for revenge.

 

"Run!" BBBB yelled. They dived for the entrance, for their lives, as the brown furball embraced the tent door. Passing them were two shady thugs!

 

"Heh heh heh! We'll hide in this park!" one suggested noisily.

 

"Yeah, heh heh heh!" noisily responded the other, who stepped on a pile of leaves immediately afterward. They began to collapse into a deep trench!

 

"Wh-wh-whoooaah!" The other thug stupidly followed.

 

"FREE HUGS!" Twin Long Rods #2 fell in. Chaos ensued.

 

Wild West Bob stormed onto the scene! "Stand back, freaky costume guys," he warned, "'cause I've got a duel disk." All of them gasped, and save for the fallen Dorover stepped back to form an aisle.

 

"Dad!" BBBB waved to his adoptive parent. "Ah'd hug ya, but ah'm too scared."

 

"Just catchin' some generic thugs, Big Bad!" Bob winked oddly, as if he were ending some sort of advertisement.

 

So he WAS doing something important... Larry thought, tossing Bob the briefcase and walking away without a word.[spoiler=Commentary][align=center]Commentary

 

Getting Big Bad's grammar right is HARD.

 

Why does Bobo have only Garnecia Elefantis and Adhesive Trap Hole in his deck, you ask? Dunno. It just sucks so hard. He calls it..."Sticky Elephants".

 

Those guys in costumes would probably freak me out any day. Especially Tyhone, but Twin Long Rods #2 may also disturb. The fact that there is a human head in his mouth is just so odd. But then again, I'm freaked out by such things as bad animation, so that might not be your idea of creepy.

 

Jenny's finally back, and she's got a (small) backstory! Yay! The idea of her being a weather forecaster is IN NO WAY based on Weather Report's username.

 

I know Great Angus is a "pig-nosed red pig". That was done on purpose, as most mistakes in WWB are.

 

Happy birthday if it's your birthday, happy new year whenever it comes, and as read in some sort of manga (translated not-very-goodly), here's looking at your kid.

 

[Today's Featured Card:]

Mage Power[/align]

[spoiler=Next Cowboy...][align=center]NEXT COWBOY

 

You like chipmunks? Good. You like samurai? Good. You like the future? Good. The next chapter is made for people like you, who like chipmunks and samurai from the future.

 

Next Cowboy: Cowboy Nine: A Mysterious Warrior Appears?! Chippie and Sam Step In!![/align]

 

 

[Kaisu]

lololololololololwut?

It's chapter one, not eight.

The others are cowboys :(

[eyeofthedeck]

OMG I was lol'ing all the way through that cowboy! That was so hilarious! I'd like to contribute to this (If i can think of something TO contribute) Or maybe Weather and Kendo can co-write my fanfic Legend of Metal! I need help thinking up filler material (even though I have planned like, 32 episodes)

[Kendo Fish]

I fixed that Cowboy = Chapter mistake and one about the quotations. I have another minor one to fix about the comma after Molten Destruction needing a space after it. GOGOGO

 

By the way, we will have a Wild West Poll up on the tenth chapter! It'll ask about your favorite character and chapter.

[Weather Report - Stand]

Alas, it has storyline importance.

 

[spoiler=Cowboy Nine][align=center]Cowboy Nine: A Mysterious Warrior Appears?!

Chippie and Sam Step in!

Chapter by Weather Report[/align]

 

The West Town Cemetery was a dark, gloomy despairing place to be. At night, an eerie mist would cover it, and some said that the dead would come back to life in the fog.

 

Nobody lived in the cemetery since Bill got arrested, besides Flamin’ Larry and Sonic Duck. They just held down the fort. A small, cute, fuzzy chipmunk wandered in whilst searching for some nuts n’ berries to munch on. He sniffed the air and skittered over a tombstone shaped like an ear. He suddenly whirled around in surprise! An electrical charge filled the misty night air.

 

Right before Chippie the chipmunk’s eyes, a man appeared in the fog, covered in electrical sparks. He looked like he’d stepped right out of a Japanese comic book! His spiky black hair reached about six inches into the air. His long, white t-shirt had a picture of a circle, skewered by an x-shape. He also wore jeans and simple, black sneakers. His black-and-white duel disk glittered silently as if it had just been polished. “Dan?” he called. “Dan, where are you?” He took a deep breath and sighed. “I guess we didn’t appear in the same place. I hate glitches.”

“Why’re you talkin’ to yourself?” a petite, high-pitched voice chirped.

Sam turned around and was face-to-face with Chippie. “Hey, it’s a chipmunk.”

“You have a duel disk?” Chippie asked. He pointed to Sam’s duel disk. He didn’t care about the teleport… for some reason.

“So chipmunks talked in the Wild West?” Sam asked.

“No, only me. But do you play Yu-Gi-Oh?”

“Sam stared at him. “Heh, you wanna play against me? How can you speak English, anyways?”

“I learned from watching people play card games.” Chippie pulled out a full-sized, yellow and white duel disk from behind his bushy tail and he strapped it onto his arm. “I’m one of the Six Legendary Beasts, animals that know how to play Yu-Gi-Oh.

 

Sam laughed. “Ha, fine. I’ll play. But you might get a little disappointed.”

“Okay, you look like you’ll lose against my level one deck. Let’s try it!” Chippie cheered, placing one of his three decks inside of the duel disk.

“DUEL!”

Chippie: 4000 Life Points

Sam: 4000 Life Points

Sonic Duck at that time had entered the Cemetary, holding the fish he’d bought for dinner, and saw the fuzzy-butt chipmunk. “Quah?!” He dove behind a tombstone and peeked out.

It’s Chippie! he thought in English! What’s HE doing here? I haven’t seen him for months! I’ve GOT to talk to him after this.

“I’ll take the first move! Chippie chimed, somehow able to support his cards within his paws. “I activate two Solar Recharge cards! I discard the top two cards of my deck, then draw two, twice!” As his cards appeared, two suns wiggled out! They burned intensely! Then when Chippie drew his cards, they fizzled out and fell.

“Then I’ll—“

“Stop, kid!” Sam ordered. “In order to use those cards, you need a Lightsworn monster on the field.”

“Then I’ll summon Lyla, Lightsworn Sorceress! Is it fair now?”

“I’ll let it slide.”

“Thanx. So, I’lluse two Foolish Burial cards. I’ll discard two Luminia, Lightsworn Summoner Cards.” Two identical, pretty girls in white dresses appeared, looked up, gasped, and got covered in dirt from above. “And finally, to end my turn I must discard the top three cards from my deck because of my Lightsworn Sorceress!” Chippie got hit by a ray of light, forcing him to discard some cards.

 

“You know, Lightsworn decks are incredible.” Sam complimented. “Good choice.”

You better believe it, Sonic Duck thought.

“My turn!” Sam drew a Reinforcement of the Army spell card. “Now you’ll know why they call me ‘Sam Rai’. I activate Six Samurai United! A large black-and-White photograph of six samurai together appeared. “Then I’ll use Reinforcement of the Army! I can add a Level Four or lower Warrior monster into my hand from my deck.” The card image appeared… and then all of the soldiers in the picture roared and charged out of the card, headed straight for Sam!

“ROOOOOAR!!” Then they immediately stopped as Sam searched his deck for a Warrior. Then he made his decision and the soldiers nodded their heads in agreement. “BREAK!” They clapped and disappeared.

 

“Next I’ll summon Six Samurai – Zanji.” A dude with a laser spear and orange-riffic armor stood on-guard.

That guy has 1800 ATK and Lyla has 1700… Sonic Duck thought. He’s only gonna do 100 LP damage. He’s small potatoes, that Sam guy.

“Now that I’ve summoned a Six Samurai monster to the field, my Unity card gains one bushido token.” A floating sphere full of samurai spirit appeared on the photo. “And also, I can Special Summon Grandmaster of the Six Samurai from my hand!”

“Hi-ya-hoo!!” An old guy with a robot eye was on the case with a laser sword.

 

Sonic Duck began sweating. Woah, this guy’s lucky. But Chippie can still summon his trump card and win…

“And now that I have another samurai, I get another token…” Another Bushido Token appeared. “And I’ll discard my Unity card to draw one card for each token on it.” The photo ripped itself in half… allowing Sam to draw two more cards. Sweet, I got Hand and Enishi. I can’t possibly lose now. “Finally, I’ll Special Summon Great Shogun Shien!”A guy clad in crimson samurai armor stood in silence.

“No way!” Chippie shouted!

NO WAY!! Sonic Duck screamed in his mind!

Come on, retaliate and drag this on longer! Sam beckoned. “And now! OTK attack number ONE! Zanji, STURIKU!!” Zanji cut Lyla in half. (Chippie: 3900)

“Ouch,” she said.

“Grandmaster! OTK attack number TWO! STURIKU!!”

“HOOYAH!” Grandmaster cut Chippie in half (not really, since he’s a hologram)! (Chippie: 1800)

“DANG!” Chippie cursed!

“Shien! OTK attack number THREE! FINAL STURIKU!!” Shien raised his blade and sliced through a Kuriboh!

“I discard Kuriboh in order to negate your attack!” Chippie said.

“OOH,” Kuriboh said, exploding.

 

Woah, that was TOO close. Chippie’s got another turn to bring that jerk to his knees. He can do it. Sonic Duck, however confident he sounded, continued to sweat and chewed his fish in desperation.

“Well, then.” Sam scratched his head. I’ll just end my turn here by setting a card face-down.” And so he did.

“Okay!” Chippie drew a card. “From that attack, the Solar Recharges and the Foolish Burials, I now have five Lightsworn monsters in my Graveyard! I’ll Special Summon the all-powerful Judgment Dragon!!” A majestic white dragon with red nails for some reason appeared, bringing with it the sun into the night!

“GYWAGOOON!!” it roared!

“Shoulda paid more attention to his Graveyard,” Sam shrugged.

“QWA-HACK! QWA-HACK! QWA-HAAACK!!” Sonic Duck cheered, pumping his fists into the air!

“I’ll pay 1000 Life Points to destroy your whole field!” Chippie smiled! “HOLY BURST!!” The dragon took flight into the air and was enveloped with sunlight. He took the form of an armored angel and unsheathed his heavenly blade. He swiped it and a massive shockwave destroyed the samurai! (Chippie: 800 Life Points)

“I’ll use Threatening Roar!” Sam yelled! Within the Chaos, an evil manticore roared at Judgment Dragon, slightly unnerving him. Then he was, too, destroyed.

Then the dragon changed back to normal and landed onto the ground. “Darn. I guess I’ll wait until next turn to win. I’ll set a monster and end my turn.”

NOOOOO!! Sonic Duck screamed! That guy’s gonna pull off a cheap combo!! This is TERRIBLE!!

 

“I summon Hand of the Six Samurai.” A deadly depressing woman appeared with a short sword. She was dressed in an interesting kimono that associated her with the element of fire. “Then I’ll remove two Six Samurai monsters in order to Special Summon Enishi, Shien’s Chancellor!” A stern man appeared in old-fashioned garb.

“I do not approve!” he said.

“I’ll use his ability to destroy one monster you control at the cost of him being unable to attack this turn.”

Enishi stared at Judgment Dragon and said… “I DO NOT APPROVE!!” He fired a laser beam from his eyes that destroyed the face-down monster?!

“…Why not my Dragon?” Chippie asked.

“Because I have a Smashing Ground card.” A massive fist came from the sky and squished Judgment Dragon. WOW.

“NOO!!”

NOOOOES!!

“HAND! STURIKU!!” Hand of the Six Samurai unsheathed, and then re-sheathed herr blade and then fired a missile at Chippie with her old-fashioned high-tech missile launcher. (Chippie: 0. GAME OVER)

 

Sonic Duck began smashing his head against a tombstone in anger! “QUA! QUA! QUA! Qua! Qua! Qua. Qua. Qua. Qua…” He fainted from stupidity.

“That was a good match!” Chippie commended! “I have a proposition for you.”

“Uh, go ahead,” Sam invited.

“Each one of the Six Legendary Beasts needs a human partner to-“

“Be their masters?”

“No, give’m food n’ stuff. They also pull them into conflicts full of dueling.”

“So you need partners because you’re bored?” Sam asked.

“And hungry! So how about it? I’ll run errands for you!”

“Uh, okay. You’ll be really useful in what I’m about to go through…” He let Chippie sit on his shoulder as he walked away.

 

“Let’s go.”

 

[spoiler=Commentary][align=center]COMMENTARY

That was a some-what boring chapter. But it introduces key characters. And the legendary dudes, including Sonic Duck, have their own hidden abilities and skills… We haven’t even seen HALF of their true potential, though they still need food and humans to help them. I hope it makes sense, but that’s all I’ve got for now. So have a crap-tastic day.[/align]

 

 

[spoiler=Today's Featured Card:][align=center]

TODAY'S FEATURED CARD:

Grandmaster of the Six Samurai[/align]

 

[spoiler=NEXT COWBOY][align=center]NEXT COWBOY

 

Wait ‘till you meet our newest character: Big Anchor! He’s an outlaw who doesn’t play by the rules…but can he still win?

 

Find out in the next cowboy!

 

Cowboy Ten: One Step Closer! Magical Deck of Destiny!

 

Don’t miss his finest hour! Or else…he’ll get you![/align]

 

 

[eyeofthedeck]

That was a cool Cowboy. I actually enjoyed that one even though the commentary said it was boring. I liked it however.

[Kendo Fish]

Hey, everyone? I said HEY, EVERYONE!! You like Wild West Bob, right? If not, stop reading it now. But if so, why not participate in the first annual (!?) Wild West Poll!!!!!!!!!!!!?

 

Send a private message to either Weather Report or Kendo Fish titled something like WWP. Tell us who your Favorite Character is, and/or your Favorite Chapter. If you vote we'll award you with...nothing. Just do it, y'all, there's nothing stopping you!

 

This is scheduled to end on September 6th 2009 (duh), but if we don't get so many votes we'll end it on September 13th 2009!

 

[spoiler=Cowboy Ten][align=center]Cowboy Ten: One Step Closer!

Magical Deck of Destiny!

cowboy by kendo fish[/align]

 

The West Town Jailhouse held some of the least vile villains of the Old West: the Thug Brothers, Hairy Jim and Mr. Vivi Jones were just a few of those kept locked safely inside. Of course Zombie Bill was there, too, sitting in a typical barred cell on a wooden bench. He was lucky the police hadn't confiscated his Yu-Gi-Oh cards. They had, however, taken the duel disks, so while dueling with the man in the cell across from him he had to bend down quite uncomfortably every Draw Phase. At least without his cards he would have been even more bored.

 

"I summon Ryu Kokki by sacrificing Spirit Reaper," Bill said half-heartedly, placing his cards in their respective zones. He now had two face-down spells/traps and a monster on the field. "Your turn, Big Anchor."

 

His opponent was a muscular man with a mustache and a tattoo of an anchor on his right, muscular arm. On his side were a Gravity Bind, a face-down monster, an Ooguchi and a Blade Rabbit in Defense Position. "Ooguchi attacks directly. I also summon Rainbow Flower He attacks directly. I flip up Swarm of Scarabs and destroy Ryu Kokki -"

 

"Wait. No. I activate Dark Illusions, so -"

 

The wall behind Bill EXPLODED!! From behind it appeared Jenny the Magician! "Zombie Bill," she happily-peppily said, "I'm here to break you out of jail!"

 

"Wh-WHOA!!" Obviously Bill was shocked, now sprawled over his trading cards from the force of the explosion. "Who're you?"

 

"I'm Jenny, the magician! Now come with me, before the authorities find us!"

 

"Uhh, okay...?" He put his cards away in his pocket and walked with her through the smoking hole in the wall.

 

"While yer at it, could'ja get me out, too?" Big Anchor asked, voice dull.

 

"Of course not!"

 

"I'll get ya someday." He didn't sound very angry as the two teleported away.

 

They appeared in the cemetery, a then-popular place to duel. "WAIT!" Zombie Bill said, backing away a bit. "Wait! You mean to tell me you can blow up wals and teleport!?"

 

"Well, what'd you think?"

 

"Oh, traveling circus shows, acts, vaudeville..."

 

"But what I meant to ask you is if I could join your group!"

 

Since when did I start a group? he thought. "First of all, you bust me out of a jail just for THAT? And secondly, why would you want to do that? I-I mean I'd like that, but..."

 

"First of all if you were in jail, the group leader who ties the whole team together wouldn't be able to perform miscellaneous crime! Nobody's offered me a job since I lost to Beautiful...so to get what I deserve, I'll need to use force." She sounded serious again, but only for a sentence. "I hope I qualify! So am I in?"

 

"Well, before I accept you..."-his voice became slightly eviler in tone-"you must DUEL me! Take out your duel disk and show me your skills. And if you wouldn't mind bringing mine here -"

 

"Already taken care of!"

 

He noticed a duel disk that had been on his arm all along. "Oh, well, that's fine too. DUEL!!"

 

Bill: 4000 Life Points

Jenny: 4000 Life Points

 

"I'll let you go first, Billy!"

 

"Don't...call me that." He drew Morphing Jar, all three of his Soul-Abosrbing Bone Towers, Call of the Haunted and Pot of Greed. There's combo potential with this...and I need not bring up the cards' hearts! he thought, grinning. "First I'll activate Pot of Greed!" A smiling green mug appeared in his hand, cackling weirdly. "I can -"

 

"Draw two cards?"

 

"Yyyeah. Now, draw!" he said, for some reason. Looking toward the sky, Bill threw the pot on the ground. The cards Monster Reborn and Snatch Steal floated up into his hand!

 

Jenny sniffed two times. "Is that a forbidden and/or limited card I smell?"

 

"Yeah, well, who cares. I'll just set a monster and a trap! Your turn."

 

"Draw!" she said, for some reason. Her hand now contained Ancient Lamp, Divine Wrath, Gemini Elf, Witch Doctor of Sparta, Chaos Sorcerer and Enemy Controller. Wow! I can make combos! she thought. "I set one monster and one trap! Go!"

 

Bill drew Destiny Hero Defender. "I'll summon my signature Soul-Absorbing Bone Tower and flip my other one face-up in attack mode!" Two big piles o' bones appeared.

 

"I wouldn't wanna live there!" Jenny waited for laughter, but none came. "My turn, right?"

 

"Suregoahead."

 

Jenny drew Brain Control, perhaps one of her most versatile cards. "I summon Gemini Elf!" Two elves, dressed in purple and blue, appeared. One girl slowly shifted from foot to foot while the other kept laughing maniacally to herself.

 

No way! The legendary beatsticks only topped by the Gene-Warped Warwolf and some other cards? Bill wasn't expecting to see THIS on the battlefront.

 

"That's not all! I use Brain Control and take control of one of your monsters, at the cost of 800 Life Points!" She waved her hands around in such an enticing manner that even the bones couldn't resist but drag themselves over to her side of the field. (Jenny, 2800 Life Points) "My tower attacks your tower, destroying both towers! The elf will attack directly! Bone Collapse! Two-Person Slap!"

 

The towers of bones collapsed on one another, imploding upon themselves in a colossal dust cloud! The elf twins simultaneously slapped Zombie Bill in the face!

 

"Ouch?" (Bill, 2100 Life Points)

 

"Your turn!"

 

Bill drew the angry Pot of Avarice. "I summon my third Soul-Absorbing Bone Tower! Can't compete with that, huh?" Jenny said nothing. "I also activate Call of the Haunted to summon one, and Monster Reborn to summon another!"

 

"Hold on! I activate Divine Wrath!"

 

"HUNH!?"

 

"I know that the summoning of your final Bone Tower will make me discard six cards from my deck...but by discarding a card from my hand I can negate that effect and destroy it!"

 

Three more looming towers appeared. One was suddenly struck by lightning! "DIVINE WRAAAAATH!!!!!" a voice almost a heavy-metal singer's shouted as the bones disintegrated into nothingness

 

"...Well, you still lose four cards."

 

"Oh, phooey!" Along with the Ancient Lamp she'd just discarded, a Magical Dimension, Chaos Command Magician, Apprentice Magician and Dark Magician joined the graveyard.

 

".....Yyyour turn."

 

Jenny drew her card...and summoned it right away! "I summon the Skilled Dark Magician!" Her famous bumbling magician appeared! "Now I use Enemy Controller to take a tower!" From behind her back she took a video controller which, though like heavy-metal the franchise hadn't existed yet, resembled the Batman insignia. "I'll destroy my Witch Doctor of Sparta to use its effect!" Her face-down monster was revealed to be a blue man with a bull's skull for a mask. He yelped chillingly as he exploded. "The towers destroy each other, and my other monsters attack! Bone Collapse, Two-Person Slap, Skilled Dark Magic Attack!"

 

The bone towers imploded violently upon impact, one of them skillfully maneuvered via a game controller!! The two elves slapped Bill nearly into submission! To finish the job, Skilled Dark Magician *sigh* tripped as he made the final blow. (Bill, 0 Life Points)

 

"That's game!"

 

This is an embarrassment...I haven't gotten a win for so long... Bill was crushed for defeat. Of course, he could use a lackey more powerful than himself. "And say, Jenny, how come you long against "Beautiful" Willie when you have this fantastic strategy?"

 

"Got the wrong cards! So am I in?"

 

"Why, of course! Why, with talents like yours we'll take this town's gold in no time!"

 

And I'll be one step closer to my dream, Jenny thought, looking towards the sky.....[spoiler=Commentary][align=center]COMMENTARY

 

So Jenny has a place in the "plot" now. Yay?

 

Big Anchor was REALLY the star of the chapter, right? He steals the show. And he DOESN'T PLAY BY THE RULES. Will he appear again? Maybe.

 

Well. Short. That's all I've got for now. Bye for now.

 

[Today's Featured Card:]

Brain Control[/align]

[spoiler=Next Cowboy][align=center]NEXT COWBOY

 

Bob's worst enemy, Zombie Bill, has just been broken out of jail! He finds a suspicious note, saying to go to the 'Huge Rock' in the 'Nevaduh Desert'. What awaits him-- a duel? A sandwich? A trap? A sandwich? BOTH?!

 

Keep yer eyes peeled for Cowboy Eleven: The Mysterious Duelist and the Desert Challenge!

 

I hope it's a sandwich.[/align]

 

 

[eyeofthedeck]

lol, can't wait for Cowboy 11! Also, Kendo Fish check your PMs because you'll have my poll entry soon.

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Hooray!

[Kendo Fish]

Yarhar! Our first votes are in but won't be posted yet due to successful reasons.

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BUMP, remember that we have a poll going on.