Skyfaring Idols - now with card images!

[kevintriedge]

[spoiler=Lore]This archetype is based on characters from Granblue Fantasy mobile/browser game that has had either an idol outfit or a character song CD released. The crew or party in the game is called skyfarers (since their fantasy setting is a world comprised of floating islands), thus the name "Skyfaring Idols." The Spell and Traps are named "Sky Realm Song," based on the Superstar job's skill of the same name.

 

Their playstyle uses Hype Counters, based on the same Hype buff in GBF, which are granted by various music-related characters. In the original game, Hype buffs grant ATK buff based on the number of stacks (max.4), which is 5%, 25%, 50%, and 100%.

 

 

The Skyfaring Idol monsters get 1 Hype Counter after they attack, which is then used for various effects. Therefore it can be somewhat important to keep them alive, which is where the Continuous Spell "Sky Realm Song - Neverending Fantasy" comes in.

 

I realize that their playstyle is way too slow to be a meta deck since they neither have powerful spamming capabilities, generates a lot of easy pluses, nor gamebreaking effects, but I certainly hope they can be a consistent or good enough tier 2 deck. Thus, I really appreciate if you can give feedback for this set, nerf broken cards, or buff them if they are actually too weak. 

 

[spoiler=Monsters]

 

Skyfaring Idol - Ferry

LIGHT / Psychic / Level 4 / ATK 1700 / DEF 1600

 

Once per turn: You can target 1 monster with a Hype Counter on it; Remove all Hype Counters from it, and if you do, that monster can make two attacks on a monster during the same Battle Phase this turn, also if 3 or more Hype Counters are removed this way, it gains 600 ATK until the End Phase (this is a Quick Effect). At the end of the Damage Step, if this card attacked: You can target 1 face-up "Skyfaring Idol" monster; Place 1 Hype Counter on it (max.4).

 

 

 

Skyfaring Idol - Aliza

 

FIRE / Psychic / Level 4 / ATK 1800 / DEF 1500

 

Once per turn: You can remove 3 Hype Counters from 1 monster you control to target 1 monster on the field; destroy that target. Once per turn: You can target 1 monster you control with a Hype Counter on it; It gains 200 ATK until the End Phase. At the end of the Damage Step, if this card attacked: You can target 1 face-up "Skyfaring Idol" monster; Place 1 Hype Counter on it (max.4).

 

 

 

Skyfaring Idol - Jessica

 

FIRE / Psychic / Level 4 / ATK 1600 / DEF 1800

 

Once per turn: You can target 1 "Skyfaring Idol" monster you control; this turn, it can attack your opponent directly, but if it does, its ATK becomes half its original ATK during the damage caculation. Once per turn, if your opponent attacks a monster you control with 2 or more Hype Counters on it: You can remove 2 Hype Counters from it; change the attacking monster to Defense Position. At the end of the Damage Step, if this card attacked: You can target 1 face-up "Skyfaring Idol" monster; Place 1 Hype Counter on it.

 

 

 

Skyfaring Idol - Djeeta

 

LIGHT / Psychic / Level 4 / ATK 1600 / DEF 1600

 

If you control a "Skyfaring Idol" monster other than "Skyfaring Idol - Djeeta," you can Special Summon this card (from your hand), but if you do, it cannot activate its effects this turn. If a "Skyfaring Idol" monster you control attacks, your opponent cannot activate Trap Cards until the end of the Damage Step. Once per turn: You can place 1 Hype Counter on a monster you control (max.4). At the end of the Damage Step, if this card attacked: You can target 1 face-up "Skyfaring Idol" monster; Place 1 Hype Counter on it.

 

 

 

Skyfaring Idol - Diantha

 

LIGHT / Psychic / Level 4 / ATK 1500 / DEF 1800

Once per turn: You can discard 1 card; Place 1 Hype Counter on each monster you control (a monster can have at max. 4 Hype Counters on it). Once per turn, during either player's turn: You can remove 3 Hype Counters from 1 card you control to target 1 face-up monster; negate its effects on the field until the next turn's End Phase. At the end of the Damage Step, if this card attacked: You can target 1 face-up "Skyfaring Idol" monster; Place 1 Hype Counter on it.

 

 

 

Skyfaring Idol Advisor, Sierokarte

 

LIGHT / Psychic / Tuner / Level 3 / ATK 1300 / DEF 600

 

If this card is Normal or Special Summoned: You can add 1 "Skyfaring Idol" monster from your Deck to your hand, except "Skyfaring Idol Advisor, Sierokarte." You can only activate this effect of "Skyfaring Idol Advisor, Sierokarte" once per turn. Once per turn: You can remove 1 Hype Counter from a card you control; this card gains 1 Level until the End Phase. 

 

[spoiler=Spells and Traps]

 

Sky Realm Song - Path Across the Sky

 

Normal Spell

 

Activate one of these effects: 

- Place 1 Hype Counter on each "Skyfaring Idol" monsters you control (a monster can have at max. 4 Hype Counters on it). 

- Special Summon 1 Level 4 or lower "Skyfaring Idol" monster from your hand, then place 1 Hype Counter on it. 

You can banish this card from your Graveyard, except during the turn it was activated and sent there, to target up to 2 "Skyfaring Idol" monsters you control; Place 1 Hype Counter on them. You can only activate each effect of "Sky Realm Song - Path Across the Sky" once per turn.

 

 

 

Sky Realm Song - Our Future

 

Normal Spell

 

Remove 1 Hype Counter from a card you control to target 1 "Skyfaring Idol" monster in your Graveyard; Special Summon it. You can banish this card from the Graveyard and remove 2 Hype Counters from a card(s) you control to target 1 "Sky Realm Song" Spell Card in your Graveyard; Set it on your field. You can only activate 1 effect of "Sky Realm Song - Our Future" per turn, and only once that turn.

 

 

 

Sky Realm Song - Neverending Fantasy

 

Continuous Spell

 

Monsters you control gain 300 ATK for each Hype Counter on them. If a "Skyfaring Idol" monster you control would be destroyed by battle: You can decrease your LP by 500 points instead. Once per turn, if a "Skyfaring Idol" monster you control would be destroyed by a card effect: You can decrease your LP by 800 points instead.

 

 

 

Sky Realm Song - Magic Note

 

Normal Spell

 

Discard 1 "Skyfaring Idol" monster; draw 2 cards. You can only activate 1 "Sky Realm Song - Magic Note" per turn.

 

 

 

Sky Realm Song - Night Sky's Droplets

 

Normal Trap

 

If your opponent activates a card or effect that targets or would destroy a "Skyfaring Idol" monster(s) you control: negate the activation of that card or effect, and if you do, destroy it, and if you do that, place 1 Hype Counter on a "Skyfaring Idol" monster you control.

 

 

 

Offstage

 

Normal Trap

 

Target 1 "Skyfaring Idol" monster you control with Hype Counters on it; Shuffle it to the Deck, then if you do, select and apply exactly 1 of these effects depending on how many Hype Counters it had.

- 1+: Destroy 1 monster on the field.

- 2+: Destroy up to 2 monsters on the field.

- 3+: Shuffle 1 monster on the field to the Deck.

- 4: Shuffle up to 2 monsters on the field to the Deck.

 

[spoiler=Extra Deck]

 

Skyfaring Idol - Cagliostro

 

EARTH / Psychic / Xyz / Rank 4 / ATK 2400 / DEF 1700

 

2 Level 4 Psychic-type or Spellcaster-type monsters

You can also Xyz Summon this card using 1 Level 4 or higher "Skyfaring Idol" monster with 2 or more Hype Counters on it. Once per turn: You can detach 1 Xyz Material from this card; add 1 "Skyfaring Idol" or "Sky Realm Song" card from your Deck to your hand. Once per turn, during either player's turn: You can target 1 "Skyfaring Idol" monster you control; Until the end of the turn, it gains 200 ATK and is unaffected by the effect of Spell/Trap Cards your opponent controls. At the end of the Damage Step, if this card attacked: You can target 1 face-up "Skyfaring Idol" monster; Place 1 Hype Counter on it (max.4).

 

 

 

Skyfaring Idol Producer, Gran

 

EARTH / Psychic / Xyz / Rank 4 / ATK 1800 / DEF 2300

 

2 Level 4 monsters 

You can also Xyz Summon this card using 1 Level 4 or higher "Skyfaring Idol" monster with 2 or more Hype Counters on it. This card gains 300 ATK for each Xyz Material it has. If a "Skyfaring Idol" monster you control with a Hype Counter on it attacks, apply these effects depending on how many Hype Counters it has.

- 1+: It gains 300 ATK during the Damage Step.

- 2+: Your opponent cannot activate monster effects until the end of the Damage Step.

- 3+: Your opponent cannot activate Spell/Trap cards until the end of the Damage Step.

- 4+: If it destroys an opponent's monster by battle, you can shuffle that monster to the Deck instead.

 

 

 

High Voltage Rockstar, Aoidos

 

FIRE / Psychic / Synchro / Level 7 / ATK 2500 / DEF 2300

 

1 Tuner + 1 non-Tuner "Skyfaring Idol" monster

This card is treated as a "Skyfaring Idol" monster while it is face-up on the field. If this card attacks or is attacked: You can remove any number of Hype Counters from cards you control; this card gains 500 ATK for each, during the Damage Step, but any Battle Damage your opponent would have taken cannot exceed 3000. Once per turn, if this card inflicts Battle Damage to your opponent: You can target 1 card your opponent controls; send it to the Graveyard. At the end of the Damage Step, if this card attacked: You can target 1 face-up "Skyfaring Idol" monster; Place 1 Hype Counter on it (max.4).

[kevintriedge]

Major edit:

- Changed the monsters, instead of units / band that sing the song, they now depict one specific member instead

- Added new cards (a monster, a Trap, two Xyz monsters, and one Synchro monster)

- Changed the effects of almost all the cards

 

Also, I am currently doing the images for the cards. Right now I'm at 10/15 progress, but I guess I'll wait until all 15 is done before finally uploading them.

[kevintriedge]

Bump

 

News update: I'm at 11/15 for the card images. Will update the first post with images once I finished them all.

[kevintriedge]

bump

[kevintriedge]

Major update! Now with card arts and a few erratas. (I have edited both the card art and the text form, but in case I overlooked something and there is a difference, the text on the card art is considered correct.)

[leafbladie]

Sorry for the late review:

 

Ferry: Okay, you can’t have “Once per turn, during your turn” and “(this is a Quick Effect)” those directly contradict each other. That attack gain should also be at least 1500 if you’re removing 3 (500 for each counter), as you’re removing counters that might be essential for more important things. That (max. 4) makes no sense also, as you can’t designate a maximum amount of counters for other monsters.

 

 

Aliza: Okay, think that first effect should be a quick effect seeing as it’s limited to monsters, and its targeted destruction. Also, that 200 ATK gain is pretty meaningless in all honesty.

 

 

Jessica: You need to specify “during the damage calculation only”. That second effect should honestly just be, “Ince oer turn, if your opponent would destroy a monster you control with at least 1 Hype Counter on it, you can remove a Hype Counter from it instead.” Not overpowered, and it serves as decent protection, anything less and you might as well just not include it.

 

 

Djeeta: That armades effect is not an effect that activates, so it won’t be negated by Special Summoning it if that’s what you thought. Anyway, half an Armades effects is fine, wish you could also prevent monster effects because Crystal Wing, but it’s fine.

 

 

Diantha: You really don’t need to have a max. for Hype Counters, or most counters for that matter, if you want a more meaningful max. Though, make it 5. Anyways, quick effect monster negation is great stuff, so nice job.

 

 

Sierokarte: Honestly you could have it activate upon Special Summon too, (I know it’s said in the guide that’s a bit strong because Stratos, but Stratos had over 100 targets, this has like 5, and you gave it a HOPT). The restrictions ion on the Synchro Summon shouldn’t exist honestly, it has no easy Special Summon condition that would warrant it.

 

 

Path Across the Sky: Proper terminology would be “place”, not “put”, when referring to counters. Anyway, LP cost isn’t necessary, both of the effects are quite fair, and I’d venture to say you could have it retrieve from the Graveyard too and it’d be fine. Anyway, Graveyard effect is decent, but you can have it activate during the same turn it was sent to the Graveyard, it’s not going to break the game if you do.

 

 

Our Future: “Remove 1 Hype Counter from a card you control, then target 1 “Skyfaring Idol” monster in your Graveyard; Special Summon it.” Since you’re only removing 1 Hype Counter, you can only remove it from 1 card, you wouldn’t say “cards”. Also, for the second effect you should say “card(s)” as you could remove it from 1 or 2 cards. Second effect is pretty nice, allowing you to recycle your Spells, so that’s cool.

 

 

Neverending Fantasy: Let’s see, with 4 Hype Counters, that’s an ATK gain of 800 at most, I’d atbkeast raise the max to at least 5 counters, or make it so that they gain 200 ATK for each Hype Counter on the field. Also, it’d be better if it protected them from effect destruction since it seems focused around battle. Finally, that last thing should say “If a “Skyfaring Idol” monster you control would be destroyed by battle, you can decrease your LP by 500 instead.”

 

 

Magic Note: Archetypal Trade-In, “what what?” As the kids might say. Anyway, remove that HOPT, it’s unnecessary.

 

 

Night’s Sky Droplets: Pretty good, but it’d be better if it was a Counter Trap.

 

 

Offstage: Pretty nice honestly, reasonable cost, and good effects, wish it could remove Spell and Traps too just in case your opponent only had 1 monster on the field.

 

 

Cagliostro: Pretty decent searcher, but I think you really only need it to require 2 Hype counters for that alternate summoning condition, seeing as you don’t have a consistent way to spam them out from what I’ve seen. Kind of wish this also protected your monster’s from all your opponent’s card effects, but I understand it’d be a bit OP.

 

 

Gran: Pretty standard counter spam, but I think it’d be more useful for your main deck monsters. Have this generate effects based on hype counters.

 

 

Aoidos: Remove that restriction on the battle phase, this should be a card to OTK, and if you put a damage cap on it, you won’t be able to. It makes about as much sense as Lightning Unicorn. The non-destruction removal effect is pretty nice though.

 

 

Overall: Interesting idea, but I think you have it backwards, your Extra Deck monsters should be where your power output is, while your main deck monsters should be the consistency that allows you to reach them. A lot of the effects you have on your extra deck monsters seem better suited for Field Spells or the like.

[kevintriedge]

Ferry: I put "(This is a Quick Effect)" on Ferry so you can generate Hype Counters first during the Battle Phase, instead of needing them in your Main Phase. I'll fix the wording for the rest of the effects.

 

Aliza: Yeah, I guess... 200 ATK feels like a filler. I'll re-think her.

 

Djeeta: Yes, I intended it so the Continuous Effect still applies even if she's Special Summoned :)

 

Sierokarte: I made it so her effect only triggers on Normal Summon because she can be summoned via Emergency Teleport. Or is it still balanced if she can search on Special too? If you think it's not a problem, I'll change it.

 

The "Sky Realm Song" cards: Noted, thanks.

 

Extra Deck cards: Noted.

 

Overall: I see your points. I'll rethink the effects for the Extra Deck monsters. 

 

 

Thanks a lot for the review! (NB: how do I rep? by liking the post?)

[leafbladie]

Sierokarte: I made it so her effect only triggers on Normal Summon because she can be summoned via Emergency Teleport. Or is it still balanced if she can search on Special too? If you think it's not a problem, I'll change it.

Yeah, the HOPT means you can only summon it once a turn to gain its effect, and most decks have searchers of similar levels to this one. Besides, E-Tele is at 2, so it's not as big a threat.

[kevintriedge]

Edited cards.

 

for Leafbladie, I appreciate your thoughts and I think they are spot-on, but I still want to make a cap for the number of counters a monster can has, if just to pay a homage to the actual game ^^; Besides, since I put the max. clause on all cards that place Hype Counters, wouldn't they count as clauses set by the card, instead of an inherent effect of the Counter? (just like how multiple Aliens on the field would make a monster lose more ATK per A-Counter). I'm open to suggestions though if the PSCT still has mistakes.

 

I changed Gran and Cagliostro a bit and make them more offensive like suggested. Also buffed and/or modified the effects of some cards, as well as fixing the OCG for them ("Place" counter instead of "Put").

[leafbladie]

I feel like you'll gain a more by reading from the guide, but I'll help you by fixing up the PSCT here, and explaining why I did so. Just give me a bit, have a few things I need to do, and it's Thanksgiving break.

[leafbladie]

PSCT fixes (Bold indicates changes I made, Strikethrough is unnecessary elements

 

Ferry:

 

Once per turn, during either player’s turn: You can target 1 monster with a Hype Counter(s) on it; Remove all Hype Counters from it, and if you do, that monster can make two 2 attacks on a monsters during the same each Battle Phase this turn, also if 3 or more Hype Counters are removed this way, it gains 600 ATK until the end of this turn End Phase (this is a Quick Effect). At the end of the Damage Step, if this card attacked: You can target 1 face-up "Skyfaring Idol" monster; Pplace 1 Hype Counter on it (max.4).

 

Reasoning:

• Use “(s)”, when you have a case where you can have a single or multiple objects, you want to add that to clarify it doesn’t matter which it is in regards to what you are referring to. However, the grammar should match the singular wording, so using “a” is still needed.

• Use “2” or any other number instead of spelling it out in all scenarios.

• “each” is used in the case that the Battle Phase is somehow repeated in the same turn.

• “this way” is unnecessary information, it’s naturally implied that you’re referring to the counters are being removed by this effect, as it follows the cost.

• “until the end of this turn” rather than End Phase, as the End Phase is not a singular point in time, rather it’s something you specify when something should happen i.e. “During the End Phase:”

• You don’t capitalize a word following a semicolon (unless it’s a word like “Special Summon” that should be capitalized in all scenarios), you only do so following a colon.

• Again, you can only specify Max. for the card itself, I’d ask someone like Dova for more help with something like this if you really feel it’s necessary (I don’t, as Max. was a dumb concept that was eventually scrapped by Konami).

 

************************************************************************************************

 

Aliza

 

Once per turn: You can remove 3 Hype Counters from 1 monster you control, then to target 1 monster on the field; destroy it that target. Once per turn: You can target 1 monster you control with a Hype Counter(s) on it; Iit gains 200 ATK until the end of this turn End Phase. At the end of the Damage Step, if this card attacked: You can target 1 face-up "Skyfaring Idol" monster; Pplace 1 Hype Counter on it (max.4).

 

Reasoning

• Always say “then target” not “to target”

• “it” is almost always used over “that target” unless you’re in situation where it could be confusing i.e. Talking about multiple cards following the colon (but here you only refer to 1)

 

************************************************************************************************

 

Jessica

 

Once per turn: You can target 1 "Skyfaring Idol" monster you control; this turn, it can attack your opponent directly this turn, but if it does, also its ATK is halved until the end of this turn becomes half its original ATK during the damage caculation. Once per turn, if your opponent attacks a monster you control with 2 or more Hype Counters on it: You can remove 2 Hype Counters from the attack target it; change the attacking monster to Defense Position. At the end of the Damage Step, if this card attacked: You can target 1 face-up "Skyfaring Idol" monster; Pplace 1 Hype Counter on it.

 

Reasoning:

• “this turn” should always follow whatever you’re clarifying should last “this turn”, unless you’re in a case where that may not be possible.

• Saying “ATK is halved until the End Phase” is the preferred method for effects where monsters target other monsters to allow them to attack directly.

• This is a case where “it” might be confusing, so specifying where you’re removing the Hype Counters from would be needed.

 

************************************************************************************************

 

Djeeta

 

If you control a "Skyfaring Idol" monster other than "Skyfaring Idol - Djeeta," you can Special Summon this card (from your hand), but if you do, it cannot activate its effects this turn. If a "Skyfaring Idol" monster you control attacks, your opponent’s Trap Cards and effects cannot be activated Trap Cards until the end of the Damage Step. Once per turn: You can target 1 monster you control; You can place 1 Hype Counter on it a monster you control (max.4). At the end of the Damage Step, if this card attacked: You can target 1 face-up "Skyfaring Idol" monster; Pplace 1 Hype Counter on it.

 

Reasoning

• This was a recent change, so makes sense why you might not have seen it, but basically the previous wording implied it affected your opponent, rather than the cards they played, so a card that is unaffected by card effects wouldn’t be able to activate its effects, because the opponent is being affected, not the cards they control, so they changed it.

• Placing counters requires targeting in nearly all circumstances, unless it’s a counter swarm effect, so you should say it targets.

 

************************************************************************************************

 

Diantha

 

Once per turn: You can discard 1 card; Place 1 Hype Counter on each monster you control (a monster can have at max. 4 Hype Counters on it). Once per turn, during either player's turn: You can remove 3 Hype Counters from 1 card you control, then to target 1 face-up monster; negate its effects on the field until the end of the next turn's End Phase. At the end of the Damage Step, if this card attacked: You can target 1 face-up "Skyfaring Idol" monster; Pplace 1 Hype Counter on it.

 

Reasoning

• “on the field” is unnecessary information

 

************************************************************************************************

 

Sierokarte

 

If this card is Normal or Special Summoned: You can add 1 "Skyfaring Idol" monster from your Deck to your hand, except "Skyfaring Idol Advisor, Sierokarte." You can only activate this effect of "Skyfaring Idol Advisor, Sierokarte" once per turn. Once per turn: You can remove 1 Hype Counter from a card you control; increase this card’s gains 1 Level by 1 until the end of this turn End Phase.

 

Reasoning

• You always want to say “increase” or “reduce” when it comes to Level modulation, unless a card “becomes” a Level.

 

************************************************************************************************

 

Path Across the Sky

 

Activate one of these effects:
- Place 1 Hype Counter on each "Skyfaring Idol" monsters you control (a monster can have at max. 4 Hype Counters on it).
- Special Summon 1 Level 4 or lower "Skyfaring Idol" monster from your hand, then and if you do, place 1 Hype Counter on it.
During Main Phase, except the turn this card was sent to the Graveyard: You can banish this card from your Graveyard, except during the turn it was activated and sent there, to then target up to 2 "Skyfaring Idol" monsters you control; Place 1 Hype Counter on them. You can only activate each effect of "Sky Realm Song - Path Across the Sky" once per turn.

 

Reasoning

• You wouldn’t be able to place the Hype Counter if for some reason the monster wasn’t summoned to the field, so having an effect that could activate despite a condition somehow not being fulfilled is generally discouraged.

• For banish effects, unless they can somehow happen during either player's turn, you want to specify it’s during the Main Phase, and if you want to out a restriction on it not being activated during the turn it was sent to the Graveyard (I really don’t think it needs it, as it’s just counter spam, and would be beneficial if you could activate it immediately), it’s also not needed to be known that it was activate this turn, and could cause ruling issues, so just say “sent to the Graveyard”.

 

************************************************************************************************

 

Our Future

 

Remove 1 Hype Counter from a card you control, then to target 1 "Skyfaring Idol" monster in your Graveyard; Special Summon it. You can banish this card from the Graveyard and remove 2 Hype Counters from a card(s) you control, then to target 1 "Sky Realm Song" Spell Card in your Graveyard; Set it on your field. You can only activate 1 effect of "Sky Realm Song - Our Future" effect per turn, and only once that turn.

 

Reasoning:

• Since you’re setting a card from your Graveyard, it’s implied that it’s your card, and therefore you’d set it to your field, so “on your field” is irrelevant information.

• Never say “You can only use/activate 1 effect of” proper PSCT dictates “effect” should follow the name of the card.

 

************************************************************************************************

 

Neverending Fantasy

 

Monsters you control gain 300 ATK for each Hype Counter on them. If a "Skyfaring Idol" monster you control would be destroyed by battle: You can decrease your lose 500 LP by 500 points instead. Once per turn, if a "Skyfaring Idol" monster you control would be destroyed by a card effect: You can decrease your lose 800 LP by 800 points instead.

 

Reasoning:

• For “instead” clauses, they aren’t effects that activate, meaning they can’t be negated, because you’re doing an action rather than what would regularly happen. So you don’t use colons in such sentences.

• Speaking of that, I have no idea how you would word a LP instead clause, because Konami hasn’t implement, partly because the idea is kind of dumb. LP have basically become non-costs at this point, but I’ll try my best.

• First off, reduce is never used when referring to LP, it’s either “Pay” or “Lose”, and since this isn’t a cost, the second is wanted. Also, the number should always precede LP, and you should never say points in the same sentence as LP, unless it's referring to something other than LP.

 

************************************************************************************************

 

Magic Note is fine in terms of PSCT, but again, don’t think it needs that HOPT.

 

************************************************************************************************

 

Night Sky Droplets

 

If When your opponent activates a card or effect that targets or would destroy a "Skyfaring Idol" monster(s) you control: nNegate the activation of that card or effect, and if you do, destroy it, and if you do that, then place 1 Hype Counter on a "Skyfaring Idol" monster you control.

 

Reasoning:

• You use “When” on a Counter Trap in all situations, as it must be activated in response to something.

• Better not to have “and if you do” twice in the same sentence, besides “then” will allow you to place a counter on the monster, even if it’s not destroyed.

 

************************************************************************************************

 

Offstage

 

Target 1 "Skyfaring Idol" monster you control with a Hype Counter(s) on it; Shuffle it into the Deck, then and if you do, select and apply exactly 1 of these effects depending on how many Hype Counters were on it it had.
- 1+: Destroy 1 monster on the field.
- 2+: Destroy up to 2 monsters on the field.
- 3+: Shuffle 1 monster on the field into the Deck.
- 4+: Shuffle up to 2 monsters on the field into the Deck.

 

Reasoning:

• You always specify that you shuffle it “into” the Deck.

• Not exactly sure how you’d do this, but from looking at several cards, I believe that since you choose which among them you want to use, you do keep “select and apply” (but remove exactly, as it’s irrelevant), and say “were on it” instead of “it had”, as monster’s don’t own counters, the counters are just placed on it.

• For the 2+ and 4+ you do not need “up to” as you can choose among them whichever one you want, so if you only wanted to destroy 1 monster, you could choose the 1+ instead of the 2+.

• I feel like it’d be made simpler overall if you removed the “select and” part, as then it automatically does it for you, and you can leave the “up to” parts in there too.

 

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Cagliostro

 

2 Level 4 Psychic-type or Spellcaster-type monsters

You can also Xyz Summon this card by using 1 a Level 4 or higher "Skyfaring Idol" monster with 2 or more Hype Counters on it. Once per turn: You can detach 1 Xyz Material from this card; add 1 "Skyfaring Idol" or "Sky Realm Song" card from your Deck to your hand. Once per turn, during either player's turn: You can target 1 "Skyfaring Idol" monster you control; Until the end of the turn, it gains 200 ATK and is unaffected by the effect of your opponent’s Spell/Trap effects, until the end of this turn Cards your opponent controls. At the end of the Damage Step, if this card attacked: You can target 1 face-up "Skyfaring Idol" monster; Place 1 Hype Counter on it (max.4).
 

Reasoning:

• For some weird reason Xyz Monsters that have alternate summoning conditions similar to this (like “Utopia the Lightning”) use “a” instead of “1”, it’s weird, but that’s how it is,

• Always put “opponent’s” before whatever it is you’re specifying their owning. Also, unaffected clauses always specify they’re unaffected by the effects, not the cards themselves.

 

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Gran

 

You can also Xyz Summon this card using 1 a Level 4 or higher "Skyfaring Idol" monster with 2 or more Hype Counters on it. This card gains 300 ATK for each Xyz Material attached to it it has. If a "Skyfaring Idol" monster you control with a Hype Counter(s) on it attacks, apply these effects in sequence depending on how many Hype Counters it has.
- 1+: It gains 300 ATK during the Damage Step.
- 2+: Your opponent’s cannot activate monster effects cannot be activated until the end of the Damage Step.
- 3+: Your opponent’s cannot activate Spell/Trap cCards cannot be activated until the end of the Damage Step.
- 4+: If it destroys an opponent's monster by battle, you can shuffle that monster into the Deck instead.

 

Reasoning:

• Again, cards can’t own Xyz Material, the Material are only attached to it.

• For the 4+ effect, though I didn’t mark anything, as I’m not completely sure how to word this effect as you want it, but there’s another way you could do it that’d be about as good, “If it destroys an opponent’s monster by battle, shuffle the destroyed monster into the Deck instead of sending it to the Graveyard” Again, maybe ask someone like Dova, or someone with more experience how you might word it.

 

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Aoidos

 

This card is treated as a "Skyfaring Idol" monster while it is face-up on the field. If this card battles attacks or is attacked: You can remove any number of Hype Counters from cards you control; this card gains 500 ATK for each, during the Damage Step only but any Battle Damage your opponent would have taken cannot exceed 3000. Once per turn, if this card inflicts Battle Damage to your opponent: You can target 1 card your opponent controls; send it to the Graveyard. At the end of the Damage Step, if this card attacked: You can target 1 face-up "Skyfaring Idol" monster; Place 1 Hype Counter on it (max.4).

 

Reasoning:

• “battles” has replaced “attacks or is attacked”.

• I’m not sure if it would be “during the damage step only” again, possibly ask someone else for help with this too.

• I removed that exceed part, there is no card I can find with a remotely similar condition, and honestly, it’s dumb. If you really want it, again, try to ask someone with more experience.

[kevintriedge]

Thanks a lot for the elaborate fixes.

 

Some of them seem to change how the effect work and/or intended, though.

 

Jessica: I did intend her effect to apply for damage calculation only, to avoid for example, raising a monster's ATK after its ATK is halved.

 

Djeeta: I thought "your opponent cannot activate X" is a valid wording? The Ancient Gears that stop S/T activation have that wording even after PSCT.

 

Path Across the Sky: I worded it "except if it was activated this turn and sent there" so that it can activate its banish effect if it was discarded for a cost/effect, but not if it was, well, activated. Also, "then" implies A has to happen for B to happen right? (source: wikia) 

 

Magic Note: basically I wanted it to be a watered-down version of the usual discard 1 draw 2 effects ^^; But yeah, I guess it does undermine its usefulness a lot. I'll remove the clause later. 

 

Aoidos: I don't remember there's a card that caps damage either. I put it there because I don't want him to be a cheap OTK card, but at the same time, making 0 Battle Damage altogether (some cards do this) is too harsh. 

 

 

 

The rest are spot-on. I'll revise the texts on the card arts soon.

 

As for Aoidos, I understand your point. I respect it and don't think it's wrong, but I wanted him to not be able to OTK singlehandedly if he used his ATK-boosting effect ^^; I just intended him to be a high-ATK monster to destroy monsters that are immune to effect destruction (which is why I also increased the ATK boost per Counter from before)

 

Thanks again for the kind review. I really appreciate it.