Pokemon Black & White 2: The Plasma Saga [Rep to constructive critisism/advice]

[DARKPLANT RISING]

[color=#000000][size=6][b]Pokemon Black & White 2: The Plasma Saga[/b][/size][/color]

What? Why I’m making a Pokemon Fan Fic in a Yugioh Forum? Because I wanted to.

I decided to go making this just because when I was playing BW2, it was WAY better than expected in terms of both gameplay and plot. I forgot everything about EVs or Eggs or that nonsense and got myself to actually enjoy the details of the world they created. HGSS’s plot was beyond terrible, and DP’s was meh too, but this was just damn awesome (never played BW ‘cause I had quit games for some time). The fact the opponents’ Levels were higher compared to the previous games also made it a bit more challenging.

Anyhow, this is basically my view of Pokemon BW2, except with much darker elements and drama added for my liking. In other words, [b]I’m aiming for something you’d watch if it became the official Anime for Pokemon.[/b] The current one (Ash and Pikachu and that bulls***) sucks @ss and you have to admit it, so I’m going to make a better one.

Enjoy.

[spoiler=Chapter 1]
August 8th – I could never get myself to forget that day, no matter how much I tried. The memories carved into my soul by bloodied claws and fangs would never fade off. Some say it was a day of change, a necessary evil that turned Unova back into the paradise it was supposed to be, but my idea is – f*** it. Those bastards KNOW they’re saying the wrong stuff. You know how men start talking nonsense like they’ve been hit with a Confuse Ray when they realize they can do nothing? Well, this is the perfect example. They’re telling lies to themselves to try to believe that the world is going towards a better path.

Again: f*** it.

See, that sort of argument meant to convince the debater over the audience is utterly pointless, and if you really believe in it, you’re a world-class idiot. The truth is clear and simple – August 8th was a day of chaos and ruin. Nothing more. The millions died in utter vain, and the future still remains grim. As long as the very roots aren’t stubbed out, the poisonous weeds will keep on growing and growing till they regain their original forms. That day might have seemed like the end, and it was still nothing but a mere makeshift. I can still remember the day when I thought the world will end.

That day, I was awoken by tremors. Wondering if some gangsters had started fighting with Ground-Types (battles were normally forbidden in this district of the town), I had rubbed my eyes tiredly and looked out the window, readying the phone in another hand, already dialing to call the police. But when the sight came into my view, my fingers stopped.

The sky was ripped in two. A jagged crevice ran across it, and on each side, dazzling light danced all the way to beyond the horizon. I couldn’t see the clouds, or the blue that was supposed to be spread above.

From one side, there flew out whirling white-hot flame that shot down in bursts, like the face of a burning planet. And on the other was black lightning, crashing down everywhere. Black lightning? Black light? I know – that’s impossible. At least, it’s supposed to be. But somehow, not in this case. Call me crazy, but I’m not. This was different. This lightning was supernatural, and easily defied the laws of the world.

Where the two sides met, gray force erupted and shone blindly. I saw a point where the light was brightest, and glimpsed two dots circling around each other – engaged in a fierce fight of life and death.

On both sides of the sky, the plasma torched the ground below. I saw cities erupt in flames – again, white flames, searing and dancing brightly. Some others were covered in the same black lightning as the ones raining down from above, sparkling and exploding. One column of fire shot down towards me from the heavens; the next second, the building several blocks from here blew up with the force. The sound of screams and burning wood echoed in my ears. The light reflected and flickered on the windows. The bursts of heat came to me, and sweat trickled down my forehead, but I was too stunned to move. I was still staring out from the window like a statue, frozen hand grasping the phone.

The chaos seemed to continue for several hours (though I later heard it was only several minutes, in fact). Then, finally, the sky cleared at once. The black-and-white force retreated into a singular point far off in the distance, shriveling and whirling, and disappeared. The blue sky reappeared where the black and white went, and sunlight shone upon the desolate, battered wasteland of gray rubble.

Silence was left.

I survived the Day of Gray. Approximately 80% of the buildings and forests of the Unova Region were destroyed on that August 8th, and over half of the population was wiped out, too. Even after two long years of suffering, some cities are yet to restore everything back.

The destruction was fiercest in my city of Aspertia, where only about one in ten people were left unharmed. My mother and father, working in Castelia, never came back. I was never able to say goodbye to much of my former classmates either. Only one of them survived safely; all the others died or got injuries so severe it was impossible to live without help of machinery. And in the case with the one classmate left, while all of his family members – mother, father, and little sister – were miraculously safe as well, he had to go to a mental hospital for half a year to recover to full health. Even now he is mentally unstable.

I? Not I. Sure, I was startled and shocked, but I never loved my parents anyways. They rarely came back from Castelia, and even when they did, they came home in midnight and were gone when I woke up. In a way, they were dead from the start for me. And don’t you start on my former classmates; I hated them from heart. They were cruel, vicious beasts. My only friend was the one who survived. I even thought at times that I had caused this disaster with my negative feelings. (Speaking of which, no one still knows about how or why the catastrophe of the Day of Gray happened. I predict it may have been caused by the Legendary Pokemon, but I am yet to confirm it.)

I fear August 8th, but not because I lost the precious. In fact, I lost nothing, and that is the reason why I fear it. I fear it because it told me that I was a terrible person who didn’t care no matter how many people died terrible deaths. I didn’t care if my parents and classmates were burnt alive, helpless and unknowing what happened to them. I just went on with my everyday life like nothing happened. But is that truly how I am supposed to be? No way! I was supposed to grieve and shed tears till midnight. Truth is, I didn’t cry for them – even once. I went to the first several funerals to crush time, but decided it was pointless and stopped going from the seventh one to read books at home. I didn’t care no matter how many of the dead classmates’ parents screamed at me on the phone about why I didn’t go. I cut the phone while they were still blabbering, unplugged the cords, and slept tight without a moment of regret. I sucked at life. And badly, too. Worst part is, I know it.

After the incident, I took control over the vast deposits of my parents – enough to live for a lifetime – and decided to go to the Trainer Academy near my house, instead of the stupid private economy school I went to before. My parents said I was going to become a businessman, just like they were, and I was never allowed to even [i]touch[/i] Pokemon (saying they were dangerous beasts that could kill you with ease), but I figured that was stupid, and so I ignored their last wills and applied there. After all, on the Day of Gray, almost all of the Trainers survived using their Pokemons’ abilities. It was needed as a way of self-protection. I didn’t care how many people around me died, but I didn’t want to die myself.

There, at Alder Academy, I learnt the basics of training and fighting with Pokemon. In three days, I will finally be permitted to go out into the wilderness of Unova and begin my journey, just like all the other people with sense did.

But this morning, outside the same window as the one I looked in two years ago –

…What is this?

Outside the window, I saw nothing but gray. Thick ice spread across the ground, covering everything, and atop it spread another layer of even thicker snow. The snow was still falling – no, rather, it was – how should I put it – avalanching from the gray, dead sky. And this snow wasn’t white. It was gray. Pure gray.

Suddenly, something came to me. An eerie feeling of dread. I blinked and scrolled through the functions on my C-Gear, and I knew what it was.

Of course, there was the problem about snow falling this time of year, and especially in Aspertia where it was almost never observed. Add how it was gray. But the date confirmed something was wrong:

August 8th.
[hr]
Appearing Pokemon
None
[hr]
Appearing Moves
(Confuse Ray)
[hr][i]NOTE-I chose August 8th for no real reason. Just felt like it was the perfect timing for it.[/i][/spoiler]

[DARKPLANT RISING]

y u no post ppl

[Ren✧]

The fact that you decided to write this fanfic in first person, is admirable...but will probably make it hard for you later on. Anyway, I find it interesting you didn't start off the fic with a Pokemon battle, like most Pokemon FanFics do. This seemed more like a prologue to me than an actual chapter, seeing as it is really just filling me in on what has happened in the 2 years after a mysterious event that killed thousands of people.

I find it strange that the main character's classmates' parents are calling him, even if their children died and he didn't attend the funeral. Most of my friends' parents have never met me and they're my friends. So, if the main character is anti-social I don't see why the parents of deceased classmates would really pay any sort of attention to whether or not he was at the funeral.

I am assuming that the character introduced in this chapter is the, or one of, the main protagonists in the story, correct? I like how he is a darker protagonist, and the fact that he is questioning himself adds a little more realism to the story.

Like I said, this seemed more like a prologue, seeing as only 1 character was truly introduced and nothing current really happened. It is pretty much a history lesson, told by a guy pissed off at himself and the world.

I see potential here, will be following this fic.

[~British Soul~]

i really like the the idea of a darker protagonist, it allows for more depth into their character and for the kind of opening you that created for the fic, it made it seem more real.

i agree with Renegade about the parents calling the main character about why they didn't attend the funeral. In my opinion i didn't think it would matter if he was there or not with his personality, especially since he was at the previous funerals to kill time.

I actually found the first chapter interesting and will look forward to seeing more chapters in the future

[DARKPLANT RISING]

I think you'll get mad if one of the only two classmates of your dead son/daughter didn't attend the funeral, tho'. Add how the other classmate went to an asylum and so he's the only healthy guy left.

Writing Chapter 2 right now, but not sure when I can post it.