Archangel of destiny Posted January 13, 2009 Report Share Posted January 13, 2009 Hello everyone this is my first attempt at a fan-fic,so here is the prologue and the first chapter,every comment is appreciated,i hope that you will like this fan-fic [spoiler=Prologue]The year is 2032 the nobel prize winning archeologist Sir Thomas Graham Cooper,has gone missing,while he was on his latest journey somewhere in Hungary,his fellow workers were the last to see him before he went missing,several months after that has happened strange things started to happen in the world starting from,the appearance of people gone missing for several weeks to appearing again but remembering nothing also there were strange bite marks on the persons neck and scars on the persons hands,The police force was in a state of confusion,no one knew what was going on. [spoiler=Chapter 1;The Mysterious Woman] Andreas was walking through Moscow ,he didn't sleep well last night,that was because for the past several nights he was having a same dream*,in the dream he was in a church,there was a funeral, at the altar there was a wooden casket he knew that he has to see who was in a casket,as he began to walk,it felt like time has stooped the people stood still and the noise just stooped,he didn't even have time to look around himself,he was looking inside the casket,and inside was Sir Thomas Graham Cooper,suddenly the body grabbed his hand and spoke something he didn't understand what,that's when he usually woke up,*he went out to try and relax,he leaned against a wall of the Moscow University and thought about the day that T.G.Cooper gone missing,he was so deep in thought that at first he didn't hear some one calling him,on the other side of the street,“Andreas,Andreas!“it was a woman's voice,the second time he heard his name,he rose his head,the women had already crossed the street and was now standing in front of him,he looked at her eyes they were red as red as blood,before he could say a word the women spoke first.„Andreas i thought that i would never found you follow me someone needs to see you“after she said that she grabbed his hand and pulled him into an abandoned house or so he thought,when they were inside he heard something breathing heavily,he looked at the women,"Excuse me what did you say your name was?"The women turned around and slowly got to him,and she said "My name is Sonja" he backed up from her a little,he put his hand on a table that had a broken glass on it,he didn't see where he was putting his hand so he cut himself on the glass,blood started running from the cut,the women got to him and grabbed his hand,her eyes were looking at his neck,she took out a handkerchief and wiped a little blood from the cut,then she got closer to him,putting her hand on his shoulder and she whispered,"I was looking for you all over the city we need you for something""Wait,what do you mean we you and me are the only ones he...."before he could finish the sentence,she bite his neck. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fenrir Posted January 13, 2009 Report Share Posted January 13, 2009 Nice, but put spaces next time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ragnarok1945 Posted January 13, 2009 Report Share Posted January 13, 2009 Good beginning, but can you double space next time to make reading easier? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Soul Legacy Posted January 14, 2009 Report Share Posted January 14, 2009 Agree'd Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ragnarok1945 Posted January 14, 2009 Report Share Posted January 14, 2009 it would make reading it less disorienting Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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