Brightfeather Archetype [Written]

[Animav]

"Brightfeather. 

Before we found that girl, we were nothing but a band of misfits, aimlessly traversing across the expansive outer space.

She gave us that name. She said it vaguely reminded her of the days she spent in her home, before some bizarre event left her stranded in this world. She doesn't remember much else, name included, so we came together to give the girl a name.

Ever since that fateful day, our travels finally gained a purpose: To find the whereabouts of Risen's home."

 

... I always wanted to do something like that when introduced a proper, original archetype. So cool, and hopefully not cringe. (Not too much, anyway)

Ahem.

 

Brightfeather is an original archetype I came up with, that will probably never see the light of day because it messes too much with the banished zone with ease, or so I want to believe. The basic idea for these cards is that they can all banish themselves in one way or another, in order to activate an effect. Then, if they're Special Summoned from the banished zone, they can activate another effect as well.

For example, a searcher would banish themselves, then allow you to search for, say, a monster, and once it gets Special Summoned, it activates another search, but for a Spell/Trap instead.

They're loosely based on the interaction that Fortune Lady monsters have with their Field Spell, which banishes them when Summoned, only to Special Summon them later -- in some cases, to even activate an effect on Summon. Back in the day, I thought that was really interesting, and wondered why there hasn't been made more stuff like that. Thus, after realizing that I could do that myself, well... I gave it a try.

Without further ado, this is what I've gotten so far, but I would love to hear some pointers regardless. I'm not any good at playing the game, and much less so at making cards, so any little bit of advice (be it suggestions for immediate changes or warnings for the future) is appreciated!

 

Brightfeather Risen

Level 3 / Light / Spellcaster / Effect

ATK 1000 / DEF 1000

Cannot be Summoned from the GY. During your Main Phase: You can banish this card in your hand or field; add 1 "Brightfeather" monster from your Deck to your hand, other than "Brightfeather Risen". If this card you control was banished to activate the effect of a "Brightfeather" monster (and wasn't negated), during your next Standby Phase: You can Special Summon this card. If this banished card is Special Summoned: You can target 1 banished "Brightfeather" monster: Special Summon it. You can only activate each effect of "Brightfeather Risen" once per turn.

 

Brightfeather Marg

Level 7 / Dark / Beast-Warrior / Effect

ATK 2500 / DEF 1500

Cannot be Summoned from the GY. If there are no "Brightfeather" monsters in your GY: You can Special Summon this card from your hand. Once per turn, you can banish 1 "Brightfeather" card in your hand or GY, then target 1 banished card: Add that target to your hand, but you cannot use it until your next Main Phase. During your opponent's Battle Phase, you can banish this card you control: Your opponent receives the next damage you would take from a direct attack this turn. If this banished card is Special Summoned: You can target 1 banished "Brightfeather" card; shuffle it into the Deck, and if you do, banish 1 card in your opponent's GY of the same type (Monster/Spell/Trap) as the one you shuffled. You can only use each effect of "Brightfeather Marg" once per turn.

 

Brightfeather Kval (Read: As in Cavalry)

Level 2 / Light / Machine / Effect / Tuner

ATK 500 / DEF 1500

Cannot be Summoned from the GY. If you Special Summon a banished "Brightfeather'' monster: You can Special Summon this card from your hand. If you use this face-up card for the Synchro Summon of a "Brightfeather" monster: Banish all the materials instead of sending them to the GY. If this banished card is Special Summoned, you can target another banished Level 4 or lower "Brightfeather" monster: Special Summon it, but its effects are negated. You can only activate each effect of "Brightfeather Kval" once per turn.

 

 

Brightfeather Kvalrise (Read: Cavalry + Rise)

Level 5 / Light / Machine / Synchro / Effect

1 "Brightfeather" Tuner + 1+ non-Tuner monsters

ATK 2300 / DEF 1700

Cannot be Summoned from the GY. When this card is Synchro Summoned: You can target a number of cards in either player's GY equal to the number of non-Tuners used for its Synchro Summon; banish those targets. Once per turn, when your opponent activates an effect that targets "Brightfeather" cards you control, you can banish this card (Quick Effect): Negate the effect, and if you do, banish that card. If this card you control was banished to activate the effect of a "Brightfeather" monster (and wasn't negated), during your next Standby Phase: You can target 1 of your opponent's banished cards, and 1 of your "Brightfeather" banished monsters; Special Summon that monster, and shuffle the opponent's card into the Deck.

 

Brightfeather Teshut

Level 4 / Earth / Beast-Warrior / Effect

ATK 1800 / DEF 500

Cannot be Summoned from the GY. You can banish 1 "Brightfeather" Spell/Trap in your GY: Special Summon this card from your hand. Once per turn, if you have no "Brightfeather" Spell/Traps in your GY: You can lower the ATK of this card by 1000 until the End Phase, and if you do, this card cannot be destroyed by battle, and if it battles an opponent's monster, destroy it after damage calculation. If this card is banished, you can shuffle this card into the Deck: Add 1 banished "Brightfeather" Spell/Trap to your hand.

 

Brightfeather's Mascot Engi

Level 1 / Earth / Beast / Effect

ATK 100 / DEF 200

Cannot be Summoned from the GY. If your opponent activates an effect that would banish a card in your GY, you can banish from your hand (Quick Effect): Negate the effect, and if you do, return that card to their hand, but it cannot be activated or Set until their next turn. Once per Duel, if this card is banished, and your opponent declares a direct attack: You can shuffle this card into your Deck; any damage you take this turn is also dealt to your opponent.

 

Brightfeather Rossa

Level 4 / Earth / Beast-Warrior / Effect

ATK 2000 / DEF 0

Cannot be Summoned from the GY. When this card is Normal Summoned: You can target 1 monster in your GY; banish it. This card cannot attack directly. This card loses 200 ATK for every monster in your GY. If there are no monsters in your GY: This card deals piercing damage, and any battle damage this card does is doubled. If this card leaves the field, banish it instead of sending it to the GY. During your Main Phase, if this card is banished, you can target 1 "Brightfeather" you control: Shuffle this card into the Deck, and if you do, that card gains 1000 ATK until the End Phase. You can only activate each effect of "Brightfeather Rossa" once per turn.

 

Brightfeather's Fleet

Field Spell

"Brightfeather" monsters you control gain 100 ATK for every banished card. If there are no "Brightfeather" Spell/Traps in your GY: Your opponent cannot target this card with card effects. Once per turn, if you Summon a "Brightfeather" monster, you can target 1 card in your GY: Banish it. If a "Brightfeather" monster you control is banished, you can target 1 card in your opponent's field or GY: Banish it until your next Standby Phase. You can only activate each effect of "Brightfeather's Fleet" once per turn.

 

[Dramatic Crossroad]

I don't see any superglaring issues with the archetype, but i wonder: Is there a specific "boss" monster or a game state or win condition to aim for the deck, or it's currently in the planning stages.

Here are the things i did notice however:
 
- There are some requirements on the cards you have in your graveyard, but no way to manipulate it directly (like banish from your own GY as a cost or effect), meaning - you are holding onto the hope that your opponent will not disrupt or destroy your cards, before you're able to use them in their intended way.

- You can shorten the summoning restriction to "Cannot be Summoned from the GY."

- "Risen" (also "Kvalrise") will not be able to be summoned by its effect, because it was not banished by its effect, it was banished for the cost ...and even if it did - it would only re-summon itself only if you controlled it, not if you banished it from your hand. Maybe re-word it to something like "During your Standby Phase, if this card was banished to activate its effect/the effect of a "Brightfeather" monster; You can Special Summon this card."

- The "when" effect of "Kval" can miss the timing or force you to not use the effect of the other "Brightfeather" you summoned, if you want to summon it from the hand.
Its effect to summon a banished monster when its summoned has no Once-Per-Turn clause and has a potential for some degenerate loops. 

- "Kvalrise"'s effect to banish your opponent's card is too specific (1. has to be a monster effect / 2. has to target your face-up card from the specific archetype). 
It is also not optional (doesn't have "You can..."), meaning - the 1st time your opponent clears the conditions - it will banish itself, so you will have zero control of the situation and your opponent can play around this card accordingly/strategically.


This is just my thoughts, i know these are casual and not in the realistic section, just want to let you know they might not work the way you intended them to, at least with the current text. Also the name "brightfeather"... i'd think the're some kind of antithesis of the "blackfeather/blackwing"s at first, but the're some kind of Chozo people, i guess :D 

[Animav]

52 minutes ago, Dramatic Crossroad said:

I don't see any superglaring issues with the archetype, but i wonder: Is there a specific "boss" monster or a game state or win condition to aim for the deck, or it's currently in the planning stages.

Here are the things i did notice however:
 
- There are some requirements on the cards you have in your graveyard, but no way to manipulate it directly (like banish from your own GY as a cost or effect), meaning - you are holding onto the hope that your opponent will not disrupt or destroy your cards, before you're able to use them in their intended way.

- You can shorten the summoning restriction to "Cannot be Summoned from the GY."

- "Risen" (also "Kvalrise") will not be able to be summoned by its effect, because it was not banished by its effect, it was banished for the cost ...and even if it did - it would only re-summon itself only if you controlled it, not if you banished it from your hand. Maybe re-word it to something like "During your Standby Phase, if this card was banished to activate its effect/the effect of a "Brightfeather" monster; You can Special Summon this card."

- The "when" effect of "Kval" can miss the timing or force you to not use the effect of the other "Brightfeather" you summoned, if you want to summon it from the hand.
Its effect to summon a banished monster when its summoned has no Once-Per-Turn clause and has a potential for some degenerate loops. 

- "Kvalrise"'s effect to banish your opponent's card is too specific (1. has to be a monster effect / 2. has to target your face-up card from the specific archetype). 
It is also not optional (doesn't have "You can..."), meaning - the 1st time your opponent clears the conditions - it will banish itself, so you will have zero control of the situation and your opponent can play around this card accordingly/strategically.


This is just my thoughts, i know these are casual and not in the realistic section, just want to let you know they might not work the way you intended them to, at least with the current text. Also the name "brightfeather"... i'd think the're some kind of antithesis of the "blackfeather/blackwing"s at first, but the're some kind of Chozo people, i guess :D 

First of all, thank you for taking the time to review this stuff. It means a lot.

Now, it is as you say -- this whole thing is still a work in progress. I have been planning the concept of the archetype for almost a week now, and just yesterday I managed to finish these few cards, since I hit a block and wanted to see if a few critiques of what I had so far might give me some ideas on how to expand it further.

Nevertheless, while I don't have a boss monster planned just yet, the basic idea of this Deck is to fill the banished pile with monsters, while leaving the GY empty save for Spell/Traps (originally wanted to keep it fully empty, but that sounded way too complicated to accomplish). Then, would these monsters be Special Summoned, you would get some kind of advantage out of their effects, be it popping cards or Summoning more monsters to do Extra Deck plays with. The fact that they often banish themselves for their effects was meant to counter effects like Called By, that would just remove a key piece in your GY but it's useless if there's nothing to Banish!

 

-- I noticed the lack of GY manipulation, yeah. In fact, a couple of these cards had their effects locked behind the requirement of having the whole GY empty, but I ended up changing it (recently, I may add) because I realized that even if I could find ways to banish my own monsters, I just couldn't banish every single Spell/Trap I played -- especially generic ones. I didn't think the interruptions through, though... Oops. Thanks for the heads up.

-- Actually, while I do admit that I messed up the re-summoning effect, the restriction of it only actually activating while she was on the field is intentional. I thought that having her Special Summon herself on your next turn would be more balanced if she was on the field rather than on your hand.

-- That When was supposed to be an If, oops. Also, I'm definitely adding an Once per Turn to the last effect. I don't want this thing to be open to any degeneracy (even if it's never going to become a thing, but it's a matter of pride).

- Kvalrise's effect was intentionally made that way because I thought a free monster effect negate on a Level 5 Synchro (that can re-summon itself, may I add) would've been a bit much. Probably overcorrected too much, though. I did miss the "You can", however, thanks for catching it. I've actually edited it like thrice already (it was a generic Level 5, and now it requires an archetype Tuner, plus other changes to wording and stuff) and yet I missed that. I'm a mess!

 

I'm at least glad that half of it is just wording errors, rather than all of it. And yeah, I suck at naming things -- in fact, these people don't even have a proper design in my head, but now that you mention it... I swear that any similitudes were not intentional, though I'm definitely sticking to the bird theme regardless :T

The Brightfeather name was just something I picked at random after coming up with the brief lore behind these cards. Originally wanted something related to space, but I couldn't come with any cool names (that weren't already taken). I tried my best, really, but that just isn't my forte.

 

But enough is enough, that this reply is already large as it is. Once again, thanks for commenting on this project. I'll include the suggestions immediately, and see what I can do to fix the lack of GY manipulation. I'm thinking maybe a couple monsters that can do so for cost, and maybe a Field Spell that both banishes and Summons banished cards. The boss monster is still up in the air, but I think it will probably be another Synchro, with maybe an Xyz or a Link.

[Animav]

Brand new wave of support is here at least. Three new monsters, two geared towards manipulating different cards in your GY, one Archetype handtrap (not a very good one, at that, I must admit), and a Field Spell that further helps banishing cards in your grave. Still no boss monster, but I think I got an idea for one at last.

I honest have no idea where this whole concept is actually going to, but I'll keep pumping cards regardless. Hopefully it will round itself out in the end.

Also, on a final note, shortly after this post, I should've edited the first four cards a little bit to take into account the suggestions, and a few changes to Marg (it only needs archetype monster to not be in the GY, instead of just monsters in general, to Special Summon itself now). Thanks again for the pointers.

Now, into the new cards!!

 

Brightfeather Teshut

Level 4 / Earth / Beast-Warrior / Effect

ATK 1800 / DEF 500

Cannot be Summoned from the GY. You can banish 1 "Brightfeather" Spell/Trap in your GY: Special Summon this card from your hand. Once per turn, if you have no "Brightfeather" Spell/Traps in your GY: You can lower the ATK of this card by 1000 until the End Phase, and if you do, this card cannot be destroyed by battle, and if it battles an opponent's monster, destroy it after damage calculation. If this card is banished, you can shuffle this card into the Deck: Add 1 banished "Brightfeather" Spell/Trap to your hand.

 

Brightfeather's Mascot Engi

Level 1 / Earth / Beast / Effect

ATK 100 / DEF 200

Cannot be Summoned from the GY. If your opponent activates an effect that would banish a card in your GY, you can banish from your hand (Quick Effect): Negate the effect, and if you do, return that card to their hand, but it cannot be activated or Set until their next turn. Once per Duel, if this card is banished, and your opponent declares a direct attack: You can shuffle this card into your Deck; any damage you take this turn is also dealt to your opponent.

 

Brightfeather Rossa

Level 4 / Earth / Beast-Warrior / Effect

ATK 2000 / DEF 0

Cannot be Summoned from the GY. When this card is Normal Summoned: You can target 1 monster in your GY; banish it. This card cannot attack directly. This card loses 200 ATK for every monster in your GY. If there are no monsters in your GY: This card deals piercing damage, and any battle damage this card does is doubled. If this card leaves the field, banish it instead of sending it to the GY. During your Main Phase, if this card is banished, you can target 1 "Brightfeather" you control: Shuffle this card into the Deck, and if you do, that card gains 1000 ATK until the End Phase. You can only activate each effect of "Brightfeather Rossa" once per turn.

 

Brightfeather's Fleet

Field Spell

"Brightfeather" monsters you control gain 100 ATK for every banished card. If there are no "Brightfeather" Spell/Traps in your GY: Your opponent cannot target this card with card effects. Once per turn, if you Summon a "Brightfeather" monster, you can target 1 card in your GY: Banish it. If a "Brightfeather" monster you control is banished, you can target 1 card in your opponent's field or GY: Banish it until your next Standby Phase. You can only activate each effect of "Brightfeather's Fleet" once per turn.

[Loleo]

Seems pretty cool so far! Would love to see the payoff!