BREAKING NEWS: Cows associated with CowCow’s Cattle Pimp Squad suspected in drive by shooting with milk squirt guns, with them targeting Dad

[Mutant Monster RAEG-HAPYP]

They fired expired milk from squirt guns at the rival group, but, they also threw perfectly good burgers at the group, thus wasting edible food.

 

Those poor burgers didn’t make it. Dad and I could not let this grave act of violence against American values slide, so out came the muthafuckin M4 Carbines. We popped those funking bovines like pew pew pew pew muthafucka. Including reloads, We fired about 1776 rounds at them cattle in the name of the United States of MUTHAFUCKIN AMURICA YOU MINDLESS BEEFBUTTS. That’ll teach em to roll up like that and disrespect the MUTHAFUCKING U.S OF A. ALSO WHY AM I SUDDENLY TYPING LIKE THIS funk YEEEAAAAHHH.

 

Don’t worry, everybody had burgers the next day. Crisis averted.