Praetorian Astartes' Vending Machine!

[Guardsman Sly Marbo]

I insert x, i get y.

 

example

"I insert a penny"

then reply:

"you got a kick in the dick,

i insert..."

 

 

 

So, allow us to begin.

 

 

I insert Tribe Infecting Virus.

[The Nyx Avatar]

You get banned.

 

*Inserts Excalibur*

[Guardsman Sly Marbo]

You get murdered by your son.

 

I insert Starfox 2.

[The Nyx Avatar]

You get cancelled.

 

*Inserts Daisy*

[Draconus297]

You get blue shell'd.

 

I insert a hubcap.

[Tojin]

You get run over by the DeLorean.

 

I insert my iPhone.

[The Nyx Avatar]

You get hentai.

 

*Inserts 500 yen*

[TF2_The_Scout]

You get 5 dollars.

 

Puts in the keys to someone's car.

[Draconus297]

You get said someone, ticked that you stole the keys to their car.

 

I insert a happy-face button.

[TF2_The_Scout]

It explodes.

 

I put in the Winged Dragon of Ra

[The Nyx Avatar]

You get the lamest Eqyptian God Card.

 

*Inserts Trap Card*

[Draconus297]

You get caught in a Bottomless Trap Hole.

 

I insert a Spell Card.

[The Nyx Avatar]

You get:

 

*Inserts my avatar*

[Draconus297]

You get IMPALED.

 

I insert ten shiny quarters.

[The Nyx Avatar]

You get $2.50.

 

*Inserts Mieu*

[Guardsman Sly Marbo]

You get BLAMMED

 

I insert 4chan

[ÆƵ–]

You get an assortment of racial slurs

 

*Inserts a purple glue stick*

[The Nyx Avatar]

You get Elmer's Glue.

 

*Inserts a narcissist*

[Draconus297]

You get distracted by their ego.

 

I insert a masochist.

[The Nyx Avatar]

You get Anita Sarkesian.

 

*Inserts Margaret Moonlight*

[Draconus297]

You get a bullet right through the sternum.

 

*inserts Alice Twilight*

[The Nyx Avatar]

You get a picture of Margaret and Alice together.

 

*Insterts winning lottery ticket*

[Tojin]

You get $100,000,000. In pennies. At terminal velocity.

 

I insert one of the pennies.

[The Nyx Avatar]

You get a silver penny.

 

*Inserts Garfield the cat*

[Draconus297]

You get an eternity of Monday.

 

I insert a smoothbore musket.