Ichigo Kurosaki

[michaelmarusich]

[zachy_syko]

Bankai! The only thing I like about these are the pictures, unfortunately...

[baritone_rob05]

good job, but the effects could be better.

[RedRecker]

Ok, I can see you're relatively new to card making, so first I'd like to say you've made a good effort. Firstly, post IMG codes. They prefer it here, I found that out too. If they haven't told you yet, they will. If you don't do it some people just won't even give you their time. Ok, now the cards, your main problem seems to lie in OCG errors. It's just the odd capital needing to go here or there, maybe a sentence or two needs some re-writing. Now I'm not going to be one of these members who says figure it out yourself because 1. that's just not helpful and 2. you're not going to learn anything from it.

So, in my opinion, this is how they should be:

 

1. Ichigo Kurosaki

When this card is Normal Summoned, add 1 "Zangetsu" from your Deck to your hand.

 

Normal Summoned should always be capitalised. If you want to see a list of the words that remain capitalised look in the Tutorial section, I saw a good one there that could help. Commas are a killer, I miss them from time to time, as do a lot of people. I think that will just come with experience. Numbers are in numerical form eg 1, 2, 3 not one, two, three. Names of cards are always put in quotation/speeck marks " " when in a card's test, ALWAYS! Deck is another one of those capitalised words. If you wanted to balance this card a bit more, make it so you can't play the Zangetsu Spell Card in the turn you add it to your hand, otherwise you've now assured yourself of a 4 Star monster with 2700 ATK, that's just insane.

 

2. Zangetsu

This card can only be equipped to a "Ichigo Kurosaki". Increase the ATK of the equipped monster by 800 points.

 

So main things here are, to add the 'a' in the first sentence, remember Ichigo is now a card, there can be more than one of him (hehe). When referring to the attack and defense values of a monster it is ATK and DEF, just like on the card. A the last bit, "points" I'm sure that's how it's supposed to go, but maybe to not include it is acceptable as well. This won't need balancing if you change Ichigo.

 

3. Power-Up

This card can only be activated if you control a face-up "Ichigo Kurosaki" equipped with a "Zangetsu" Equip Spell Card. Tribute 1 "Ichigo Kurosaki" equipped with a "Zangetsu" Equip Spell Card to Special Summon 1 "Tensa Zangetsu Ichigo" to your side of the field (now at this point you didn't mention where from so i'll just say...) from your hand or Deck.

 

Now, for the first part, I mentioned that the Ichigo Kurosaki you tribute must be equipped with the Zangetsu card for the effect. Otherwise, you could have two Ichigos and Tribute the Spell Card on one whilst Tributing the other monster. That just sounded more like what you wanted to me. Again with the numbers, and remember to say where to summon it from, hehe I've forgotten to put this sometimes but it's important. Good otherwise.

 

4. Tensa Zangetsu Ichigo

This card cannot be Normal Summoned or Set. This card cannot be Special Summoned except by the effect of "Power-Up". When this card destroys a card as a result of battle, increase its ATK by the ATK of the destroyed monster.

 

Ok, now going through the rest of your cards, I can see you are generally remembering the "" marks, seems you forgot in the first one. But, yeah, the capitalisation again is a miss. As for the actual effect, it is a quite overpowered. I mean it has 3000 ATK already, so if you destroy a monster with even 2000, you get 5000 ATK! Maybe you should make it that it gains half the ATK instead, and say original ATK, so that it doesnt count any increases as well.

 

Ok, that's all I have to say, I know it's a hell of a lot, but I hope it's helpful to you. Think of it like this, I took the time to look at these cards and write this much, whether you want to listen to this or not is up to you. Also, if you like Bleach, I'm planning to make a set of them myself some time, if you want I can tell you when it's done and you can take a look.

[overheat]

the cards are great. bet they are too basic. make more effects to cards

[michaelmarusich]

thx for the very very very long reply. and i would like to see your bleach set so i can get some ideas for my bleach set.