SliferMan2005 Posted February 18, 2015 Report Share Posted February 18, 2015 I'm not writing it, just take it down, i'll remake another time, i read the rules Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Flash Flyer - Sakura Posted February 18, 2015 Report Share Posted February 18, 2015 I'm not the Fanfic mod, but I can basically tell you that stuff isn't following directions. Might want to read them, before Aix or Nai get at you: http://forum.yugiohcardmaker.net/topic/255950-ycm-creative-writing-forum-rules/ Anyway, there's a good reason why script format isn't particularly liked; doesn't allow you to elaborate much on the characters. If you can give this to some random people and they act out this scene, that's great; but based on this context, I don't believe that would be the case. Here, Atem and this other duelist don't have clear indicators of what they look like, nor did you provide any information on Kikotry's monsters (remember, they are customs so we don't know what their powers are). --- If Atem didn't know about Xyz Summons, then how did he manage to get one out of the blue, and then proceed to OTK? This is why you need to flesh out the chapters, so we get a better picture of what's going on. Lack of announcements for when a character draws, ends their turn and so on. Story's okay, but severely lacking in details. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chaotic Angel Posted February 18, 2015 Report Share Posted February 18, 2015 Exactly what Sakura said. Thank God I'm a writing expert. The whole concept is lacking depth and detail, not just one or two things. The fact that you made a duel that ended with a OTK really overdid it a bit, so that kinda ruined everything for me, sorry. Also, follow the rules. Why is it there in the first place? EDIT: Plus, judging by this, the whole fiction is just under, if not less than two pages. Better go fix that too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aix Posted February 18, 2015 Report Share Posted February 18, 2015 I actually removed the no script format thing due to people saying how it's very possible to output stuff of real artistic value with script format, but this is a still little short. You have 48 hours to fix before I lock it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SliferMan2005 Posted February 19, 2015 Author Report Share Posted February 19, 2015 I know u guys are modes, but honestly i didn't expect people to actually read my crap, + i must have skipped over a couple rules by mistake Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SliferMan2005 Posted February 19, 2015 Author Report Share Posted February 19, 2015 @chaotic Angel, I'm fixing all the problems, should be finished and remade soon, read it then Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chaotic Angel Posted February 19, 2015 Report Share Posted February 19, 2015 Looking forward to it. Also, it would be wise not to post twice in a row. It could lead to misunderstandings and accusations of spamming. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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