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Agro Predicts Smash V Lineup

Agro

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Agro Newbie

Agro

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I AM USING YCM TO PROCRASTINATE ON A PAPER

 

So first off, it's clear we gotta get some new Mario characters in here. Now Smash IV had 2 new characters so I thought: hell, why don't we add two of them in here? So because of that, the first two characters we're gonna see in Smash V are Waluigi and Captain Toad. Now Waluigi's gonna be a bit weird. Obviously he's tall and lanky, giving him a big hit-box, but he's super thin and his movement will be erratic enough to try to balance that out. Of course, all his moves will be Mario Sports-related because, let's face it, those are the only games he's been in. Captain Toad will have alternate skins so that you can play as not only regular Toad, but also Toadette. His super will create a power star that asshole-bird will come and steal, with Toad hanging on, they will ricochet around the level, causing damage and launching anyone they touch. He will have the best taunts in the game such as getting dizzy and falling asleep. Waluigi will have neither of those things because Waluigi. Of course, every Mario (Mario, Luigi, Peach, Bowser, Wario, Yoshi, & Bowser Jr.) character will make a return in this game. Except Rosalina because fuck Rosalina. Also Dr. Mario is an alt.

 

Next, we have Donkey Kong. The first addition will see the inclusion of another main character, as well as another female character to the cast in Dixie Kong. Her moves will vary from Diddy's while being slightly similar, and of course, her double jump will be the hair-flying technique we see in several of the DKC games. A second addition will come in the form of the first villain to make an appearance from the Donkey Kong franchise in King K Rool. His moves will be I have no idea, I've never played the first 3 DKC games. Donkey Kong and Diddy both make a return.

 

The Legend of Zelda will include Skull Kid, because Majora's Mask 3D has to result in something in this game. We'll probably also get the Majora's Mask stage from Melee back because of his inclusion, and of course, all his moves and taunts will make people smile/horrified. The second inclusion is Girahim. Or maybe it's Vaati. Or maybe these two bigger-villains-not-named-Ganondorf find their way into being the same character and just become different alt skins of each other. Who knows, but Black was angry they weren't in and as you know, I care about his opinion greatly. Link, Zelda, and Ganondorf all make a return, but Toon Link gets cut... or does he?

 

Metroid desperately needs a new inclusion and since Sakurai said he may not work on the next game, I say fuck his opinion, let's put Ridley in the game alongside Samus and I guess, sure, we'll keep ZSS. Kid Icarus doesn't get any new characters because they had one too many in Smash 4. Also Dark Pit is an alt again and Pit has the electroshock arm because its cooler, frankly. Palutena is in because she's cool.

 

The same thing that happened to Dark Pit will happen to Lucina with Fire Emblem representatives. She will become an alternate for Marth, this time with at least one alt leaving the mask on. Robin makes a comeback, but Ike, not having been in a recent game, gets the axe and/or broadsword. In their place, however, comes a unique Fire Emblem character. Trying to decide what to bring in, I decided it was likely a brand new character would make an appearance, but since I can't possibly know of any future Fire Emblem game, I decided on a more diverse character. And that character is Tiki, who is a Manakete, meaning she can turn into a fucking dragon. Get her the fuck in Smash. Oh, and Robin will be back, and hopefully any new game has a create-a-character to enable that.

 

Kirby, Dedede, and Shittier-version of Meta Knight all make a return for Kirby, but don't get any new characters because I wanted Meta Knight out completely because spite. Starfox gets none past Fox and Falco either because how dare they cut Wolf. Pokémon will see Lucario cut because the rage effect is already broken as it is, plus putting Mewtwo in instead gives me the 3 main Pokes (M2, Pikachu & Jigglypuff) + Water starter (Greninja) + Fire starter (Charizard) + Grass starter, which shall be Sceptile in honor of ORAS. Animal Crossing gets its second entrant alongside the Villager by adding in his archnemesis: Tom Nook.

 

New franchises will see an inclusion, as always, so next up comes the gun-wielding former-assist-trophy in Saki Amamiya from Sin & Punishment. His style will be stylish. YEAH. Splatoon Girl will make an appearance as well for more guns and shit (I don't know what to call her so yeah). Thirdly, once assist trophy, then ignored, and now back again as a playable character is Isaac from Golden Sun (Yeah, but which Isaac?) Shut up, Agro. Also, since every game since the original has had a new character from a classic NES game that hasn't gotten a new title (Ice Climbers, Pit, Duck Hunt), we'll probably see a new character from a classic NES game that hasn't gotten a new game. And I have no idea what would get it so I'm ignoring it.

 

Mr. Game & Watch, Duck Hunt, Little Mac, R.O.B., Ness (with a Lucas alt), Captain Falcon, Olimar, and Mii Fighters will all make a return.

 

Finally, we have 3rd Parties. Sonic, Mega Man, and Pac-Man all make a return, but looking at SEGA, Capcom, and Atari, we're clearly missing a Konami entrant. No, Snake's not coming back. Snake's never coming back. I'm talking about the only main character in Captain N that isn't already in the game. I'm talking about Castlevania's Simon Belmont. His moves are pretty obvious, really. The second character seems really obvious in retrospect: Bomberman. No, seriously, how has Bomberman not been in Smash Bros?

 

Oh, I forgot to mention one more character: Baby Mario. In a kart. You question my judgment? Well consider that he will have Baby Luigi, Baby Peach, Baby Daisy, and fuck, why not, Baby Rosalina as alts. Not enough for you? Fine, lets round it out to 8 alts. Baby Wario, Baby Waluigi and uh... Baby Yoshi is definitely a thing. But these aren't just Mario characters, they're really Mariokart characters. So in addition, let's add in a Baby Donkey Kong. And you know what I just realized, at this point, you already have four of the characters that were in the original smash bros, and considering Mario Kart 8 has been turning into Smash Kart, let's throw in Young Link, Pichu, Igglybuff, and Baby Kirby (is a thing). To round out that original roster, and get these alts to an even 16, just design a Baby Fox, Baby Samus, and Captain Falkid (trademarked) and you're good to go! (Sorry Ness). Also with this many alts, make the alt limit for every character 16. And hey, since we're here, add in 16 player battles to be absolutely stupid.

 

Oh and any other characters cut in the past 3 games come back as DLC and get varied attacks if they're a clone. THAT IS ALL I NEED TO WORK ON THIS PAPER FUCK

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Toffee. Newbie

Toffee.

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IMO, Lanky Kong should be in the next Smash game.
I mean, it's about time HE becomes a playable character.
It's Nintendo, so it just HAS to work.
Plus.... I highly doubt NO one would not use him.
And given the sort of STYLE this character has, it would be a lot of fun.

Just sayin'

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Agro Newbie

Agro

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Midna was only in one game.

 

Skull Kid has been in multiple (though different iterations), as well as Vaati. Girahim has only been in one, but he's the most recent one, was also an assist trophy, and can easily be made an alt of vaati.

 

Albeit, Midna would have some interesting moves with that twilight wolf.

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Shradow Newbie

Shradow

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No. Baby Mario & Baby Luigi should be a two-person character like the Ice Climbers and have moves based on Partners in Time.

 

Let's get Paper Mario in here, too. An Action Command gimmick with him would be cool.

 

Hyrule Warriors gave Midna another appearance as well as a fighting moveset.

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Agro Newbie

Agro

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But it was a game, so Midna's been in two. More if you want to count how she's been represented in Smash Bros.

im not counting all star casts as appearances. especially if she's only an assist trophy. other assist trophies have more reasons to appear.

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Agro Newbie

Agro

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So real-talk.  We need a new Golden Sun game that doesn't suck ass so we can justify putting Isaac in.

does that mean there'll be a third isaac too?
 
 

Lack of Bayonetta is disappointing.

Bayonetta doesn't belong in smash. sorry.
 

You're right, I can't believe I forgot.
 
And speaking of spectacle fighters by Platinum, The Wonderful Ones.

They were in consideration, but were cut because they lost in the following categories:
Weird Character Choice: Saki Amamiya
Non-1st Party Character: Bomberman
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Shradow Newbie

Shradow

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There's a difference between listing off character ideas you'd want in Smash Bros. and telling someone else their idea won't happen matter-of-factly.

 

Oh, I remember the character I would want most in Smash Bros. Travis Touchdown. Seems like a nice fit to me.

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Agro Newbie

Agro

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There's a difference between listing off character ideas you'd want in Smash Bros. and telling someone else their idea won't happen matter-of-factly.
 
Oh, I remember the character I would want most in Smash Bros. Travis Touchdown. Seems like a nice fit to me.

Well it won't.
 
 

WHY DON'T WE JUST GET IT OVER WITH; SHREK IN SMASH BROS. YES OR YES!?

surprisingly, you may be the reason I lock this thread
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