What I learned from my family

[Blake]

Today, my family had a late Thanksgiving due to circumstances. To honor this, here's a list of what they've taught me over the years.

1. Everyone talks behind every other persons' backs. Everyone.
2. Effort means nothing to anyone that isn't a grandparent or spouse. 100% or bust.
3. Never give anything to other people. They'll just rob you blind. Then come back for more when they lose it. Especially food.
4. The sins of the past are never truly forgotten.
5. Cleaning never ends, not even when it's over.
6. You shouldn't share money with your family. Instead, throw copious amounts of it at your drug addicted in-laws.
7. Everyone hates everyone else, and even a death in the family can't stop it for more than a few hours.
8. Ex-spouses are the most hateful people on the planet... Bar people who come into blood money.
9. No one stays behind to clean up at gatherings, despite the efforts of old people to make meals. Also applied to any life situation, bar deaths in the family.
10. Holiday gatherings and people suck.

I hope the wisdom I've experienced for almost 22 years is correct and helpful and not stupid unusual bull.

[goddamnit names are a pain]

Ouch.

Yeah, I think it's time for me to stop b****ing about mine being boring. At least I can enjoy it at times.