Yu-Gi-Oh! - Envoy of the Beginning

[Envoy of Twilight]

[spoiler=Note]Bonus points if you can tell what this is about. I'd be fairly disappointed if you couldn't tell. Anyway, let me know if you think I should continue this or not! I'd love to hear some opinions.[/spoiler]

 

Prologue

 

As I stood before the great gateway in front of me, I couldn't help but hesitate. I had spent my entire life training for this moment, but it simply was not enough; I still required the aid of Chaos. Glancing down at my steed, the violet equine remained stiff and silent, mentally preparing itself for the journey. Ever since I was small lad, I had heard tales of the great Chaos Zone and the power it possesses. It had been said that those who passed through to gain power would gain immense strength and abilities, but at a cost. Unfortunately, the cost had never been revealed to me. At this point, it mattered very little. Readying myself for the final time, my twin spears at the ready, I tapped my foot on the side of my mare to signify that we were now under way. Charging forward, the great emptiness seemed to suck me in, closing behind me. I was marching blindly into a sea of white and blue, unable to make out any definite shapes.

 

That changed very quickly, however. Suddenly, before my very eyes, a great figure sprung up from the bland landscape, the dark silhouette far contrasting all things around it. Upon closer inspection, I made out the form and shape of what seemed to be a dragon. Calling itself The Envoy of the End, it told me that it was the final instrument in the God's plan to recreate all that exists. The story meant little to me. My only goal was to gain the power of Chaos to destroy the great red-eyed, black dragon that was attacking my home. I knew well that the kingdom could not take much more damage than it had already sustained in my absence. Listening to the beast further, still charging forward through the seemingly never-ending void, the speech ended with a question.

 

"Gaia. Are you prepared to leave your current form behind for the sake of the God's plan? Do you willingly offer up your body to receive the gifts of Chaos?"

 

The question was simple, and I nodded in response. I cared little for the price at this point and my focus was most definitely elsewhere. The moment my head stopped moving up and down in a nod, my body went numb. Time seemingly stopped. The dragon had vanished, and I was frozen. From nowhere, with a deafening tearing sound, my entire body was filled with sharp pain. After those few moments, I couldn't remember a thing. The very next thing to register in my mind was being outside of the portal, in front of my home. I immediately noticed that I was no longer on my steed, standing firmly on the ground.

 

It didn't take long for me to notice the next change; my armor had become far more regal and exquisite than before, adorned with golden trim and an open-faced helmet. My usual spears had been replaced as well, and I was now wielding what appeared to be a single sword. The overall craftsmanship of my new attire was astounding. With a surge of energy, I felt the new power I had attained. Storming forward into the kingdom, It felt as if I was running on air. The dragon was near the center of the city, wreaking havoc with great blasts of fire. My sword pointed, I sprung toward the beast, pointing it at the monster's head. Before making contact, a familiar voice rang in my head.

 

"With this victory, you shall become an Envoy. Your mission will be to signal the beginning."

 

 

[Bahamut - Envoy of the End]

Bit of advice: Do yourself a favour.

 

Take a look around this section.

 

Don't waste your time.

 

Your writing looks good, potentially, even if the content/prologue itself doesn't particularly interest me personally. Things move a bit too snappily "this happened, then this happened, then this, then this, THEN THIS HAPPENED", but it's alright.

 

But... yeah... if you want to write for yourself, brillant and do it. Just save yourself the time/energy of posting it here and expecting feedback. You won't get it.

[Envoy of Twilight]

Bit of advice: Do yourself a favour.

 

Take a look around this section.

 

Don't waste your time.

 

Your writing looks good, potentially, even if the content/prologue itself doesn't particularly interest me personally. Things move a bit too snappily "this happened, then this happened, then this, then this, THEN THIS HAPPENED", but it's alright.

 

But... yeah... if you want to write for yourself, brillant and do it. Just save yourself the time/energy of posting it here and expecting feedback. You won't get it.

 

Thanks for the tip, man. You seem to be correct about the lack of feedback, haha. I'll post it elsewhere as well and see what happens. Thanks for giving it a read, though.