Yu-Gi-Oh! Common Fates - Chapters 3 and 4 Up!

[Delibirb]

 

This is a fanfic I will be working on now for Yugioh, that I hope you will enjoy. It will use many new-age mechanics and cards (in addition to my own pretend cards made here) but in a traditional way, throwing back to the original series.

 

[spoiler='Character Bios']

 

Lance Orion

Deck - Heroic Challengers

Favorite Monster - Heroic Champion - Kusanagi

The Primary Antagonist, Lance is a well-known but relatively weak competitive player of the popular card game Duel Monsters. Although he attends every tournament he can with his friends, he rarely makes it as far as they do. However, he loves the fun of playing the game more than anything, and is always there to support hiss buddies.

 

Mary Cassie

Deck - Gimmick Puppets

Favorite Monster - Number 40: Gimmick Puppet of Strings

Mary is a secondary protagonist of the series, and later love interest to Lance Orion. Always attending tournaments with Lance and Trent, Mary is a very powerful duelist who often reaches far greater heights than her friends, but always seems to lose to Brock Edwards.

 

Trent Perceus

Deck - Gishki Rituals

Favorite Monster - Number 47: Nightmare Shark

Trent is a very powerful top-tier duelist, or at least he could be if weren't so caught up in the fun and paid attention to strategy and cunning like Mary always tells him. He is best friends with Lance Orion and Mary Cassie, attending tournaments together and occasionally dueling with them to move on. However, due to his lack of seriousness, he has never beaten either of them.

 

Brock Edwards

Deck - Hyper-Venom

Favorite Monster - Evil Dragon Ananta

Brock Edwards is the primary Anti-Hero of the series, and common nemesis to Lance, Mary and Trent. He often ends up facing and defeating Mary Cassie, and although he has never had to face second-rate duelists like Lance and Trent, he is positive they would be no match for his reptiles.

 

Luxor Mandalay

Deck - ?

Favorite Monster - ?

The primary antagonist for the first arc of the series, Luxor organized and leads the Five-Star Tower Tourney, offering his entire corporate empire to the duelist who reaches and defeats him at the top of the Tourney Tower.

 

Kay Kue

Deck - ?

Favorite Monster - ?

​Kay Kue is a reoccurring antagonist, occasionally appearing to challenge the main trio to duels. He uses a new and powerful deck each time he faces them, never revealing his true strategy until he already has the advantage. He appears to be supportive of anyone who plays the game for fun and enjoyment over prizes, but his motives for defeating them are unknown.

[/spoiler]

[spoiler='Prologue']

"Two face-down cards, Trent? Very well. Strings, attack directly!"

 

"Ah, why didnt you fall for my bluff?!"

 

"Because I know you only run one Mirror Force, and you already used it. Minus 3000."

 

"Fine, Mary, your go..."

 

"Ill just attack again."

 

"Fine! Ill set a card now! Now you can't-"

 

"Raigeki Break."

 

"..."

 

"Attack for Game, Trent?"

 

"What, no way! Lance, what am I at?"

 

Trent was at 700. One more attack from Mary's Gimmick Puppet of Strings was more than enough to end their fourth duel in a row. But Trent knew he could beat her, he had faith in his Gishki monsters.

 

"Lemme see your hand, Trent."

 

He had a Gishki Beast and Gishki Zealgigas. Obviously his other face-down wasn't helping him if he didn't negate her last two attacks. His Gishki Beast might stall for a turn, but no matter what he drew he wouldn't get his ritual monster on the field.

 

"700 Life Points, she's got you again, man."

 

"Alright, then. Shuffle my deck?"

 

"Trent, this is our fourth duel, we need to stop before you rip your cards." Mary pleaded.

 

"She's right, Trent, besides, news says there's a fancy Duel Monsters thing going on downtown, maybe we can get some new cards!" exclaimed Lance.

 

"Alright, ill beat you tomorrow Mary, with my all-powerful new cards!"

---

Downtown, a tall, slender man looked up at his nearly completed triumph. People would begin to flock within the hour, attracted by the Duel Monsters painted on its sides; the bold architecture to demand attention from miles around; the promise of riches.

 

This will be our triumphant return. The tables are prepared, the dice will roll, the cards will be dealt. The game is won before it begins.

 

An announcer proclaimed to the city, "Welcome duelists and Duel Monsters fans, to Mr. Luxor Mandalay's Five-Star Tournament Tower!"

 

​Events are occurring which have occurred before and will occur again. The luck shall fall to him, to them, to us. 

 

[/spoiler]

 

Table of Contents

Arc 1

Chapter 1 - Let the Games Begin

Chapter 2 - In the Swamp's Murky Water

Chapter 3 - Girl Power!

Chapter 4 - Meeting Kay Kue

[Delibirb]

Here is Chapter 1. Next chapter will begin the first duel of the tournament!

[spoiler='Chapter 1']

Lance, Mary, and Trent were all racing downtown, eager to see the strange tower laden with Duel Monsters was doing in the middle of the city. It had appeared overnight, and now adorned the Nebula skyline. As they got closer, though, traffic increased dramatically, and it got significantly harder to race. Slowing to a quick walk, the trio was a mere 3 blocks away from the mysterious building before they were stopped.
A duel!

“Aren’t you the forgetful one today? It doesn’t matter how many monsters you summon, my Venom Swamp is still on the field, weakening your monsters with each passing turn!” exclaimed one of the duelists triumphantly.

“Not quite, because now I activate my trap card: Dust Tornado! Your Venom Swamp is gone, and my monsters are safe!” barked the other.

“Is that so? And what if I activate my own trap? Venom Burn! So now, I can target your Scrap Dragon, who has 7 Poison counters on it, and reduce your Life Points to zero!”

A massive serpent escaped the unveiled trap card, wrapping itself around the mechanical dragon. It lunged its fangs into the monster’s neck, removing each Poison Counter and quickly draining its opponent’s Life Points. The defeated child fell to his knees as the holograms vanished. The other approached him, holding out his hand to help him up. But the boy didn’t return his hand. Instead, he handed over the Scrap Dragon card, and ran away from the tower, toward Lance, Mary and Trent.

Lance knew who the winner was. All three of them did.

“Hey there Brock!” said Trent, getting the winner’s attention. Brock turned to face them.

“Mary, and her, friends… Good, an almost challenge and two easy wins. Mandalay is mine.”

“Sorry?” asked a puzzled Mary Cassie.

“You will be good practice for the tournament, and your little buddies, should I have the time to face them, will assist in my victory.”

“Tournament? Is that what the tower is for?” responded Lance Orion.

“No, it’s just a stage prop to get attention for the new burger stand half a mile away. Yeah, that’s the tournament.” A sarcastic Brock Edwards retorted.

A booming voice sounded in the streets, reverberating off the glass of the smaller skyscrapers.

“Welcome duelists and Duel Monsters fans, to Mr. Luxor Mandalay's Five-Star Tournament Tower!”

“It’s starting. Better get to the tower, or I may not get a chance to crush you again, Mary.” Brock said as he left, back turned to the trio.

As they ran through the crowds to get closer to the tower, the announcer continued.

“I am sure you are all ready to hear about this fantastic Duel Monsters tourney and what this massive tower has to do with it, so let me hand the mic over to the tournament organizer, Mr. Luxor Mandalay!”

So that must be what Brock meant when he said Mandalay was his.

“Thank you, duelists and dueling fans! I am sure you are eager to begin the tournament, but some explanation is required such as rules and of course, regulations.

“To begin, the tournament will take place in this Five-Star Tournament Tower, as you may have guessed. Within it are 7 floors, containing a number of elevators. Your goal, duelists, is to reach me on the top floor. But doing so will not be as easy as exploring a vertical maze.

“You will be dueling each other, of course. You can challenge anyone and everyone to a duel, and turning down a challenge will not be accepted. Some of you may block elevators with the price of a duel. Some may stay on the first level to simply deal with the weak. And some of you will be defeated countless times, never reaching the second floor.

“Some elevators one may simply enter, provided no one is blocking the way. Some are hidden, and may require cunning to open. Others may require you have defeated a certain number of duelists. Whoever reaches me on the 7th floor, and defeats me in a duel…

“That duelist will win my entire gaming corporation, no strings attached!”

A cheer of excitement from the crowd as the trio approached to tower at last. Lance looked up to the podium as his eyes met those of Luxor Mandalay, wandering the crowd.

He wore a white top hat, with a vibrant green and white suit. He bore a green cane and monocle to match, and what appeared to be a small shoulder cape, covering most of his dueldisk.

“So now, my wonderful friends, enter, duel, lose, and most importantly, win!”

The doors to the tower opened, and hundreds of duelists flocked in to get as high as they could before the dueling began. Lance was being pushed closer to the tower, but as he looked around, he was being separated from Mary and Trent!

“Trent! Mary! Guys!”

“I’m alright, man!” yelled Trent.

“We’ll all meet up inside!” screamed Mary. “And hey! May the best girl win!”

“Not if I have anything to say about it, Mary! Forget tomorrow, I’m defeating you today!”

And I, thought Lance, will try to have fun. No matter what happens, I’ll enjoy myself with my Heroic Challengers!
[/spoiler]

[Delibirb]

The first duel of the series, and I personally think it is one for the ages. Also, you can download the YGOPRO replay of this duel here! :)

 

[spoiler='Chapter 2']Swimming through the crowd, Lance attempted to locate Mary and Trent. Once he found them, they would begin trying to find a way up as quickly as possible before having to duel anyone. On his way through the doors, the pool of duelists became a small single-file line. Men were speaking to duelists as they entered the tower. When it was Lance’s turn, the man asked him a question, but lance was so caught up in the noise and adrenaline, he didn’t hear.

“Hey, kid. Name? Now?” asked the man again, impatiently.

“Uh, Lance, Orion.”

“Deck?” he asked, with a slightly more polite tone.

“Heroics?” responded Lance.

“Hm, haven’t seen a Heroic in a while. Anyway, favorite monster?”

Favorite monster? What was this, some sort of survey? What did a favorite monster have to do with anything? Maybe there was a card to winner rule in effect, which would explain what he saw outside with Brock. But wouldn’t Luxor have mentioned that? He did say rules and regulations, after all. Not that he said a whole lot, anyway.

“Kid, favorite. Monster. What is it?”

“Sorry, sorry. Heroic Champion – Kusanagi.”

“Alright, go on in.” said the man, with a tone of finality. “And don’t hurt anyone!” he added in a joking manner.

Behind him, Lance heard the man asking the next duelist.

“Name?”

“Brock Edwards. My deck is Hyper-Venom. My favorite monster is Evil Dragon Ananta. May I go?”

“Well, mister snooty. I can see why you like that card. Yeah, go on, and tone it down, kid.” Replied the man in a significantly more rude tone.

“You should be nicer to him, he’s just doing his job.” Lance remarked as Brock passed by him, eyes forward as if he didn’t care to notice him.

“Oh? And who is it that thinks that? Oh. Mary’s pet. Or one of them. Where is she then? I need a warm-up.”

“We were separated, so I’m not sure. We could duel, though.” Lance offered. He didn’t like Brock, at all. In fact, he imagined Brock in a much more menacing light than he actually appeared. In Lance’s mind, Brock Edwards was tall, well-built, but Neanderthal-esque. In all honestly, Lance wasn’t sure how he looked any more after so long picturing him in such a way. But he was rude, that he was sure of.

“If I would duel either of Mary’s pets, it would be the one who has a half-decent deck.” Now Lance was really angry. It was one thing to want to duel Trent over him, Lance rarely achieved as high standings as his friends, but it was another thing to insult his monsters.

“That was a challenge, Brock. Not an offer.” Lance retorted. He was confident now, he had faith in his Heroic Challengers.

“Oh? Well, alright. I can’t turn you down, and it isn’t like this will waste my whole day.” Brock was emanating an air of arrogance, one that Lance couldn’t wait to snuff out.

Simultaneously, their dueldisks unfolded. A small crowd gather; they knew what was about to happen. As the duelists placed their decks in their dueldisks - the crowd eager to behold their epic battle - what appeared to be cameras on the ceiling revealed they were actually be holographic projectors, prepared to generate the most life-like monsters available.

“I challenged you, so ill begin!” yelled Lance across the field. He drew his top five cards, eager to show Brock the power of a hero. “Draw!

“I’ll set three cards face-down, to begin.” a near shaking Lance stated. He always shook in his first duel of tournaments, and he didn’t know why. It just seemed as everything would get cold. But win or lose, he would overcome them, and he would win this duel!

“Frightening.” responded a sarcastic Brock.

“Humph. Ill activate Card Trader, and then set a monster to end my turn.” Lance’s face-down monster took its place on the field, as a sly and malevolent looking man rose from his spell card.

“Decent first move, pet. Let me see, how can I defeat you the fastest? I summon Venom Serpent in attack position!” A massive slithering mass rose from the monster card, revealing it’s mere 1000 ATK and DEF. “No response? Excellent. Now I can Special Summon Kagetokage from my hand! And I overlay my two Level 4 monsters to summon King of the Feral Imps!”

A great atrocity was now born from the union of the two monsters, a king indeed. King of the Feral Imps had 2300 ATK points to its name.

“And by detaching one of his Materials, I can add a Reptile monster from my deck to my hand.” added Brock, thoroughly amused with his move.

“I chain to your King’s effect my trap card: Threatening Roar!” Lance yelled. He wasn’t letting his opponent summon such a beater that easily and get away with it.

“Very well. I end my turn.”

Lance’s turn again. He drew his Pot of Duality. No, I need a Level 4 monster! I need to Xyz to destroy his Feral Imp!

“By Card Trader’s effect, I return 1 card from my hand to the deck, so I can draw a new card!” Now let’s hope this Pot of Duality turns into a- No! Another Spell! That’s alright, I can work with this. I hope.

“I activate the Spell card The A. Forces, increasing the ATK of all Warrior monsters I control by 200 for each Warrior or Spellcaster on my side of the field!”

“But you have none.”

“Yet. I sacrifice my face-down monster,” Sorry, Swordshield, “To Summon Heroic Challenger – Warhammer!”

A great warrior rose from the card, prepared to smash all in his path with his mighty weapon. He appeared a formidable match for the King of the Feral Imps.

“But, pet, you’re A. Forces only increases his ATK by 200, leaving him at the same strength as my monster. And with no cards in your hand, I doubt you want to destroy both our monsters?” Brock was pleased with this scenario, and so was the crowd.

Brock still had 5 cards in his hand, and with absolutely none in Lance’s it was evident who the victor would be.

“I end my turn.”

Brock looked at the card he drew. “Now it begins. But first, ill set one card, then use my Feral Imp’s effect for the last time to add a Reptile monster to my hand. And now,”

The great behemoth of a duelist smashed down his card onto the dueldisk with clear excitement – this was it, the card that would assure Lance’s defeat, he knew it.

“I activate the field card: Venom Swamp!” The warm tower interior transformed with rays of light from the hologram projectors; the field became a thick swampy mess, the crowd was hidden in a dense fog and thick wood. A canopy covered the nature arena in a shroud of darkness; the ultimate field spell.

“You will come to hate this card, and there is nothing you can do to stop it! Now, during each of our End Phases, a Venom Counter will be placed on every monster whose name does not contain ‘Venom.’ But I’m not through yet, pet!

“Now I summon yet another Venom Serpent, allowing me to summon another Kagetokage! And, you guessed it; I overlay them for another King of the Feral Imps! And once again, his ability will allow me to search out a reptile monster!

“Now, King of the Feral Imps, destroy Warhammer!” yelled Brock at the top of his lungs.

“But that will destroy your Feral Imp , too!”

“He has no materials, and has outlived his usefulness; A fair trade to allow my new King to attack directly!” As Warhammer and one of Brock’s Kings well to the swampy water, the other leaped across their sinking bodies, taking away 2300 of Lance’s Life Points. “I end my turn, but because my King of the Feral Imps is not a Venom monster, he gains a Venom Counter.”

The King crouched in despair, as 500 ATK points were drained from it. “What? What is that?” asked Lance, puzzled and worried.

“Oh yes, monsters with a Venom Counter lose 500 ATK for each counter they have, and if their ATK reaches 0 due to that venom, they are destroyed.” Brock seemed completely calm in the eminent demise of his own monster.

This was why Lance hated Brock, he had no respect for his monster like Lance did. It was all to meet his goal. Like the man had said earlier, there was a reason Brock used Reptile monsters; he was a snake himself.

Lance drew. Heroic Chance?! No, that isn’t helpful yet! I need a monster to use this on, and I don’t have any! “I use Card Trader again!” Lance returned the card he drew, shuffled his deck, and drew once again.

“Happy, pet?”

He wasn’t happy, it was a trap card; one he already had set and was also useless without a monster. “I end my turn…”

“Very well, but Venom Swamp poisons my King of the Feral Imps again, reducing his ATK to 1300.” The monster howled in agony as it was weakened even more by the toxic waters. “And now, I draw.”

Now Brock had 5 cards once again, with Lance at a mere 1. He had no idea how he could pull this off. “I set a card, and once again use King of the Feral Imp’s effect to add a Reptile monster! And, I sacrifice my King to summon the powerful Venom Boa!”

Powerful? The snake which rose from the depths of the waters was a Level 5 monster, and yet it had a meager 1600 ATK. It’s effect must be strong to account for such weakness in statistics.

“Attack, Venom Boa!” the serpent slithered into the water it came from. Beneath the surface, the stirring of the reeds could be seen as the boa crept ever closer to Lance, before it struck! Now, Lance was left with 4100 Life Points to Brock’s 8000. “And now, I end my turn, but because Venom Boa is a Venom monster, the Swamp has no effect.”

Another dead draw! Heroic Champion – Warhammer needs a Tribute, and I still have no monsters! “Card Trader will return another card to my deck so I can redraw!”

“Yes, we know!” Brock began to cackle with shear amusement, and the crowd joined in. The pressure was on; Lance had no supporters, no friends to cheer him on. Just the Heroic Challengers in his deck.

And he wouldn’t have it any other way.

This might be of use. “I set one card, and end my turn!”

“Still no monsters? Too bad. I draw!

“I’ll set one monster, then have my Boa attack again!”

“Activate trap card: Compulsory Evacuation Device!” Now Lance had it, at least for now. “Return your Venom Boa to your hand, Brock!”

“Very well. It matters little to me. I end my turn.”

Once again Lance was forced to use Card Trader. Luckily he had it on the field at all, or he would have lost long ago. But this time he drew something he really could use. “I activate the Spell Card: The Warrior Returning Alive! Now, I can return to my hand any warrior monster, and I choose Heroic Challenger Swordshield!” He could at least hold him off another turn before he can Xyz Summon.

“Wrong! Snake Deity’s Command! Thank you for returning my Venom Boa to my hand, because this Trap Card requires me to reveal a Venom monster, allowing me to negate your spell!” No! What am I supposed to do with just my Warhammer?!

“Getting pretty tired of this, but I end my turn.”

“Just scoop, pet, it will be easier than facing my Reptiles any longer!” Brock was eager to win, this was clearly longer than even he expected.

“I set one card, then summon Gentlemander in attack mode! Next, I flip my Jar Turtle face-up!” A little lizard in a suit climbed out of the tall grass, as a red turtle with a massive shell slowly crawled to his place in the swamp waters. “And now my monsters attack!”

Now Lance’s Life Points were down to 2700, and Brock still had taken nothing. “Now, since these monsters are both Level 4, say hello to my third and final King of the Feral Imps! And search out another Reptile monster! That’ll do for now. Next turn, you are through!”

I drew a Swordshield. He might protect my life points for a turn, but… “I’ll use Card Trader again.” Heroic Challengers Swordshield and Extra Sword. Not what I was hoping for. “One monster face down will end my turn.”

“Finally, this duel can end! But first, my Feral Imp loses another 500 ATK, bringing him down to 1300. Not that he will be around for very long.”

“Now let’s see, use my King’s effect to search for a Reptile, check. Summon Venom Snake? Check. But, I think I’ll end my turn now, until I can get a stronger monster to ensure I deal with your face-down card.”

Yes, an arrogant mistake! Now I can summon my Xyz monster. And- oh yes! I drew Double Lance!

“I will flip my face-down monster face-up, revealing him to be my Extra Sword! Next, I summon Heroic Champion – Double Lance! And when I summon a warrior monster, I can activate the trap card Copy Knight! This will summon itself to the field as a monster of the same Level: 4!” Yes, I’m on a roll! Brock definitely looks phased!

“And with all 3 of my monsters being Level 4; you know what happens next! I overlay my 3 warrior-type monsters to form: Heroic Champion – Kusanagi! Because I used Extra Sword as an Xyz Material, my Kusanagi also gains 1000 ATK!”

A great warrior climbed from the bushes, walking on the swampy water taking his place on the field. With 2500 ATK to start with, and another 1000 to boot, he would prove a challenging adversary.

“Very well, pet, but I won’t let you summon a powerful monster without a price; activate Venom Burn! By selecting a monster on the field with Venom Counters, I can remove them all and inflict 700 damage to you for each; so I choose my King of the Feral Imps, who has 3 Counters on him, equating to 2100 damage!” Brock was right, that would do 2100 damage.

“You are the one who is wrong this time, Brock! My Kusanagi has his own ability! Once per turn, I can negate a trap card by detaching one of his materials, and Kusanagi gains 500 ATK! How does it feel to have the Swamp working in my favor?!”

“What? Impossible! Your monster has 4200 ATK points!” Brock was flabbergasted, and the crowd now cheered for the new apparent victor: Lance Orion.

“Kusanagi, attack the King of the Feral Imps!”

“No, this I cannot allow! Activate Gentlemander’s effect in my hand, summoning him to the field!” the well-dressed lizard once again joined the battle. “While Gentlemander is on the field, you cannot attack other monsters, and since he is in defense mode, I will take no damage! What do you have to say to that?” Brock sounded confident, but his body language suggested genuine fear.

“Fine, Brock. Ill destroy your Gentlemander, and end my turn.” He may be safe for the turn, but Kusanagi will keep me safe as well.

“Remember, pet! Venom Swamp is still in play, your silly warrior is weakened back down to 3700 ATK, and my King of the Feral Imp earns his 4th Counter.

“And now, since it is my turn, I set one card, then activate Venom Snake’s effect! At the cost of not being allowed to attack this turn, I can place one Venom Counter on your Kusanagi! Now I sacrifice it to summon Venom Boa, who has a similar effect. The only difference is he adds two Venom Counters!”

Kusanagi was now weakened past his original ATK, to 2200 points. Brock laughed with malicious amusement. “I don’t get the joke.” The crowd concurred with Lance.

“Well of course not, you can’t see my hand. This duel has gone on long enough. Your Kusanagi is now weak enough for me to end you. Behold! I banish every Reptile Monster on the field and in my Graveyard to Special Summon: Evil Dragon Ananta!”

A massive serpent rose from the murky depths, displacing the holographic water to flood the viewing crowd. It’s one head split now, into seven separate necks and sets of fangs. With each inch it rose from the water, it appeared to grow a mile. This, was Brock’s favorite monster.

“My Evil Dragon Ananta gains 600 ATK for each Reptile I banished to summon it. Since I banished 12, his ATK becomes an unstoppable 7600 points! More than enough to destroy your Kusanagi and end this duel once and for all!”

The great writhing beast lunged forward towards the warrior. As it neared rage to attack, a magical glowing sword rose from the water into Kusanagi’s hands, and he took his stance ready to counter the attack.

As the great dragon reached the warrior, another rose from the swamp to shield Kusanagi, as he held the magic sword over and against the oncoming beast.

 

As the smoke cleared, the monster which shielded the attack vanished, as Evil Dragon Ananta fell to the water, its heads removed with great strength. Only Kusanagi stood.

“What? What! How did this?! What did you?! My dragon is invincible!”

“Not exactly, Brock. You should have been paying attention. Remember that trap card I set the first turn? It’s called Heroic Retribution Sword, and it grants my Heroic monster the ability to reflect the same damage I take to you as well, and destroy any monster that battles with the almighty sword!”

“Then how did your Kusanagi; you! How did you survive! You should still have taken more than enough damage to destroy you!”

“Still wrong, Brock, because I had Heroic Challenger – Sword Shield in my hand! By discarding him, he can protect my Heroic monsters from being destroyed, and reduce any battle damage I would take to 0! Although it means you don’t lose any Life Points either, your strongest monster is destroyed!”

Now Lance had the upper hand. With all of Brock’s monsters removed from the game, and Kusanagi still standing, Lance had the opportunity now to take the victory.

“Grrraaaaahhhh!!! I end my turn!” Brock yelled with rage and despair; his favorite monster was destroyed, and there was nothing he could do. “But Venom Swamp will still weaken your Kusanagi!”

Kusanagi will out, my favorite monster survived his, he can survive a little poison.

“I summon Koa’ki Meiru Bergzak to the field! Because of The A. Forces, and I control 2 Warriors, Bergzak’s ATK is increased to 2400, and now Kusanagi’s is 1900 points, so they will attack you now!”

Brock was only 1000 Life Points ahead, it was anyone’s game. Lance only hoped he kept drawing well, because his hand was empty once again, versus Brock’s three. “I end my turn, which means Koa’ki Meiru Bergzak is destroyed, and my Kusanagi loses another 500 ATK points.”

“Hrgrggrrr, I summon another Venom Serpent, and use its effect to add another Venom Counter to your Kusanagi. That will end my turn.” Brock was stalling, his hand must not be very good; he relied too much on his Evil Dragon Ananta that he doesn’t have any other good moves to make. “And in the End Phase, Kusanagi now goes down to 200 ATK points. At the End of your next turn, it will be destroyed.”

“That’s alright, I summon Heroic Champion – Sparta! With The A. Forces, his ATK becomes 2000, and Kusanagi’s is at 400. So my Sparta will attack and destroy your Venom-“

“No! I activate Ambush Fangs, to end the battle phase and add a Venom Counter to Sparta!”

“Did you forget Kusanagi can negate Traps?!”

“No, actually I didn’t! I chain a second Ambush Fangs! Your Kusanagi can only negate one trap per turn, so this one will resolve!”

He was right, Sparta was down to 1500 ATK, and Kusanagi to 900, with Venom Serpent still standing. Lance ended his turn, reducing his monsters’ ATK by another 500.

“My turn, I Tribute Venom Serpent for Venom Boa, and add 2 Venom Counters to Kusanagi, destroying him once and for all!” It was true, Heroic Champion – Kusanagi’s ATK had reached 0 by the effect of Venom Swamp, which meant he was destroyed. “Lucky for you, Venom Serpent can’t attack this turn, so I end my turn.”

Now Sparta is at 300 ATK points. That’s OK, I just drew the perfect card. “I activate The Warrior Returning Alive to add Heroic Challenger – Double Lance from my Graveyard to my hand, and summon him! Now I can overlay my two Level 4 monsters to summon Heroic Champion – Excalibur!”

The mighty warrior Excalibur descended from the branches of the canopy, his great broad sword splashing into the water with devastating intent. “I can now detach both of Excalibur’s Materials to double his original ATK, and with The A. Forces, his ATK is now 4200! So Excalibur, attack his Venom Boa!”

The great mighty warrior swung his broad sword down on the cowering snake, slicing it in two before it fell into the water, and leaving Brock with 1100 Life Points. Now, now Lance was in the lead. Maybe he could win this!

“Venom Swamp still decreases his ATK by 500!” Brock reminded him.

“Yes, but because the double of his ATK lasts until your End Phase, his ATK is left at 3200. So go ahead.”

“I activate Magical Mallet to return two cards from my hand to my deck, to draw two new ones.” Now Brock was stalling even more. “Then ill set a card and activate Viper’s Rebirth to revive my Venom Boa! And he will add 2 more Venom Counters to your Excalibur!

“I end my turn, and so my Boa is destroyed, but now your Excalibur’s effect wears off, and he is left with 200 ATK!”

“Well, I don’t have any way to save my Excalibur, but I can have him attack you one last time, even if it is only for 200 points!” Now Brock was at 900 Life Points, but Excalibur was destroyed; Lance was wide open for a direct attack.

“Hrraaaaaahh!!! Magical Mallet will return one card to my deck!” Brock was angry, he was scared, but worse, he knew he couldn’t win. “I set a card to end my turn!”

Brock had 1 card in his hand and two set cards with Venom Swamp. But Lance had everything he needed in his hand.

“I’ll use card trader to return one card in my hand and draw a new one.” Not what I was hoping for, but I don’t need anything now but this. “Now, I Special Summon Photon Thrasher, since I don’t control any monsters. Since The A. Forces is still in effect, he has 2300 ATK, more than enough to attack you directly for the win!”

The warrior slung its glowing sword across Brock’s chest; the crowd, and Lance, watched as his Life Points fell to 0. What looked like a clear win for Brock became his epic loss.

“My, my Reptiles couldn’t protect me, from a couple of girls with swords?”

“That’s just it Brock. You have two flaws. You-“ Lance began, but was interrupted.

“No! This is not true, this cannot be true! A meager little pet defeating my Evil Dragon Ananta? I, I need to win. I need to go defeat someone, my monsters need to show me what they can do!”

He doesn’t respect his monsters, or those of his opponent. Those are his flaws, and hopefully, that will mean he doesn’t defeat me, Mary, or Trent anymore; the jerk.

Now, as the holograms dissipated and Brock disappeared into the crowd, Lance thought he saw Trent’s spiked hair in the distance.

“Trent! Hey Trent, wait up!”[/spoiler]

[Delibirb]

Here's Chapter 3! This duel couldn't have a YGOPRO replay, because it uses custom cards, the Amour Archetype, which you can take a look at here!

 

[spoiler='Chapter 3']Author’s Note: You have no idea how difficult it was to make this duel. Because non-existent cards were used so extensively, I couldn’t play this out in YGOPRO, I had to find a way to randomly shuffle and play the decks multiple times to create a realistic, suspenseful duel with the outcome I needed. I hope you enjoy my blood, sweat, and yes, tears.

Where did the wave of duelists take those two? Mary thought to herself. This first floor isn’t that big, they couldn’t have gotten too far.

Mary could handle herself; she was the best duelist of the three after all. But they were her best friends, and she wanted to support them in their duels just as much as she wanted their support in her own.

Maybe I’ll go challenge someone. Hopefully the boys will see my Gimmick Puppets and come running.

Mary had already told the nice man her name, deck, and favorite monster. He said to a couple of people he could tell why their favorite monster was, well, their favorite monster. But he didn’t say that to her. Instead, he looked at her and smirked before gesturing her through.

What is so special about my Number 40?

When she realized she was standing in the middle of the floor, lost in thought, she snapped to. After all, a top duelist like herself couldn’t be seen dilly-dallying, and she still had to find Lance and Trent. She looked around for signs of Trent’s spiked hair; nothing. However, she did see a large group of boys clamoring around something.

Lance might be over there, dueling or watching a duel.

She was wrong; it was just a bunch of teenage boys staring at some girl. Wait, was she dueling? Indeed, and it looked like she was about to lose, too. Her opponent, a guy around the same age as the rest of the onlookers, had a massive monster on the field; Great Maju Garzett. He sent his monster right at her, but she revealed a card in her hand, and suddenly Garzett’s attack was reflected back to her opponent!

The boy looked absolutely mystified by the events. As the hologram of his fallen creature vanished, and the woman’s dueldisk folded back up, he approached her. But she stopped him before he got within three feet of her.

“Not so fast, lover-boy. The deal was if you won, remember?”

“Didn’t I? My Great Maju Garzett had over 6000 ATK points, you should have been creamed.” The boy looked confused; he didn’t see what she did.

“You must have lost your attention. I won. Isn’t that right fellas?” the crowd burst out in agreement. There are other girls who play this game, guys.

“Right, so who wants to challenge me next? Same prize: if you beat me, you get a nice long smooch!”

So that was why all these boys were hanging around her; she was swindling them into dueling her, and beating them senseless. I guess I should duel so my boys can find me. There shouldn’t be too many Gimmick Puppets here.

“I’ll duel you.” Mary yelled to the woman. She had tight shorts, a shirt two sizes too small to show off her stomach, and longer hair; though it was tied back with the ponytail brushed around to cover her chest.

“Oh? Well I wasn’t expecting any girls like you here.” She responded.

“No, not for the kiss. Just to duel. I’m hoping my friends will find me if they see my monsters; we were separated.” Mary didn’t exactly like what this girl was doing to win, but she tried to stay polite; she didn’t see too many other girls at tournaments, let alone get to duel them.

“Oh. Well no thank you.” The girl seemed disinterested in anything not having to do with her entourage.

“Well technically,” Mary began, “you did challenge me. Not specifically, but it was an open challenge. So now we have to duel.” That probably wasn’t true, but Mary wasn’t letting this chick get out of this one.

“Humph, fine. I’m Amy, nice to meet you.”

“I’m Mary.” One could feel the feminine tension slicing the male audience into frenzy.

They faced each other, one arm on their hip and the other in front of them as their dueldisks slid open. The hologram projectors in the ceiling armed themselves for the oncoming battle.
“If it’s OK, I’ll make the first move-“ Mary began, but the crowd booed in dispute. Clearly they are hypnotized.

“It would seem our audience wants me to begin. I’m happy to oblige.” Amy drew. She was content with enthralling her victims before squashing them.

“Let me see, ready boys?” the crowd yelled and whooped and whistled in excitement. “Alright, then I will Summon Poem of Amour in attack position!”

At first, it seemed a mighty metallic black dragon rose from the card, wings outspread and maw ready to engulf Mary. But as more of it rose into view, it was revealed to be a girl in a costume; a revealing one at that. Reason number two why these boys are here: hot female monsters.

Yet, the Poem of Amour had 0 ATK points. Why would Amy play such a weak monster in attack mode?

“Beautiful, isn’t she? And she has a darling effect. If I reveal another monster whose name contains ‘Amour’ in my hand, I can add an Amour monster from my Deck to my hand! So this,” Amy showed a monster to Mary before parading it around to the audience, “is my Chance of Amour, and now I will add a card to my hand. Now, let’s see.

“I activate the Spell Card: Amorous Gathering! By discarding an Amour monster, I can add two other Amour monsters from my Deck to my hand! So I’ll discard my Tyrant of Amour so I can search out my Love of Amour and Legend of Amour!” Amy did as she said, boasting once again her female monster cards.

“Then I shall Set a Card and end my turn.”

My turn, let’s see. Decent hand, but I don’t know anything about these Amour monsters. “I’ll start by Setting two cards, then I Summon Gimmick Puppet Gear Changer!” An odd knick-knack of sorts sprung from the card, standing up against the dragon girl on the opposite side of the field. “Now since I control only a Gimmick Puppet monster, I can Special Summon as well Gimmick Puppet Magne Doll!”

Another green rag-doll sprung from Mary’s hand next to the Gear Changer. “My Gimmick Puppet Gear Changer can change its level to that of any other Gimmick Puppet on the field. So now both of my monsters are Level 8! Now I can overlay them in order to Xyz Summon my favorite monster, Number 40: Gimmick Puppet of Strings!”

A massive wreck of parts from multiple dolls rose from the ground, held up by thin cords, standing tall and mighty compared to the Poem of Amour. “Not quite, Mary.”

Amy showed the crowd two cards. “I activate the effect of Love of Amour! By discarding her, I can negate your Special Summon, and banish it, so long as I reveal another Amour monster. And oh, look at this! I reveal Legend of Amour! When this girl is revealed for an Amour monster’s effect, my hand count increases to 8 for the rest of the duel!”

Mary’s Gimmick Puppet of Strings looked back at its owner as if to apologize for its failure. It isn’t your fault, Strings. These girls pack a punch. “I end my turn.”

Now Mary and Amy had 2 cards in their hands, with Mary having 2 Set cards to Amy's 1.

“Well of course you do. My draw!” Amy over exaggerated her draw pretending to drop her card so that several boys jumped in to grab and return it to her. “Oopsie, thank you dears.

“I’ll activate my Poem of Amour’s effect, to reveal Chance of Amour again. Now I’ll add this to my hand. But that will end my turn.”

She doesn’t seem to be doing much. She must be plotting something, because she isn’t even trying to hide her hand from her adoring fans.

“I activate Junk Puppet, which lets me Summon a Gimmick Puppet from the Graveyard, so I will return Gear Changer to the field!”

“Wrong again, Mary. Sorry, my girls are being so rude today, aren’t they? Oh well, I activate another Love of Amour, revealing my Chance of Amour to banish your Gear Changer. Such ugly things should not be in the presence of my girls.”

Gah! I can’t do anything, how am I going to beat these cheerleading wannabes?! “I end my turn. Again.”

“Thank you Mary, now let me see.” She pretended to examine her hand while actually letter her audience see her monsters. “I’ll Set another card, and then use Poem’s ability, revealing Chance, to search out this beauty. Your turn.”

She is toying with me, but my Puppets will win. She is relying too much on her little girls. “Draw.”

“Oh, before you begin, I’m going to activate this Tyrant of Amour. Now, whenever you use a card from your hand, I get to draw a card!” Dangit, that girl’s got everything!

“Whatever, I summon Gimmick Puppet Egg Head-“

“Draw.” Amy smirked.

“Yes, anyway, now I’ll use his effect, discarding a Gimmick Puppet monster – this Gimmick Puppet Dreary Doll – to change Egg Head to Level 8. Now, I can banish a Gimmick Puppet monster from my grave, being Magne Doll, so I can Special Summon Dreary Doll from the grave! And since she is also Level 8, I overlay them to summon another Number 40: Gimmick Puppet of Strings!
“Now, I will attack your Poem of Amour!”

“I don’t think so. Poem of Amour can’t be destroyed by battle if I reveal an Amour monster in my hand, so I’ll reveal this Chance of Amour. Oh, and she takes no battle damage!”

What kind of a monster is this?! “Well, then I’ll use Strings’ effect!” The mangled doll grabbed one of the strings holding it up and lassoed the dragon costumed girl. “At the end of your next turn, your chick will be pulled down and destroyed, and you’ll take 500 damage for it! All it cost was sending Dreary Doll to the graveyard."

“Whatever, you done yet? The boys are getting restless.” Amy was unimpressed. What does she have planned?!

“Yes, go ahead.” Tramp.

“Oh, well that’s too bad,” Amy said referring to the card she just drew. “But at least it’s pretty! Now then, I activate Poem of Amour, revealing this beauty: Amour-Amouru-Ra, the Amour! When this girl is revealed for an Amour monster’s effect, I can Special Summon her to your side of the field!”

Another of Amy's feminine monsters leaped to the field, right in front of Mary. She was pretty, Mary guessed, but the bunny costume certainly got in the way of that; it looked ridiculous.

"Amour-Amouru-Ra's battle position cannot be changed, and you'll notice it has 0 ATK points. Not that it matters, because now I activate my Wrath of Amour! By revealing three Amours in my hand - Chance, Union, and Heart of Amour - I can destroy every card you control! Say goodbye not only to Amour-Amouru-Ra, but also you hideous doll and your face-down cards! And for each card Wrath destroyed, you take 400 damage."

As Gimmick Puppet of Strings fell into the ground, the string it had looped onto Poem remained attached. "And I end my turn."

The first damage of the fuel had been dealt now, leaving Mary with 7200 Life Points.

Suddenly, the string around Poem of Amour began to tug, pulling the girl into the ground, but with a snap of Amy's fingers, she string was cut, pulling into the grave only dust. "Poem cannot be destroyed by effects either, as long as I reveal an Amour monster: Chance of Amour. Continue, Mary."

"Fine, i'll draw." What can I do, as long as I can't destroy her monster, or inflict battle damage, I cant bring down her Life Points!

"Mary! Listen!" someone called out from the crowd. Lance!

"Remember Mary, there is more than one way to win! You don't have to attack to beat her!" Lance yelled out. How long has he been there? How does he know I can even do it?
 

Wait, it makes sense! I can do it!

"I'll use Gimmick Puppet Dreary Doll's effect again, banishing Egg Head to summon her to the field. Next, because I control only Gimmick Puppet monsters, I can Summon from my hand another Gimmick Puppet Magne Doll! And finally, I summon Gimmick Puppet Gear Changer, who will become Level 8!"

"3 Level 8 monsters? No matter, you still can't attack me." Amy sounded like she knew what Mary was going to do. Clearly she hadn't seen the true power of Gimmick Puppets before now.
"I overlay my monsters to summon Number 88: Gimmick Puppet of Leo!" A great mechanical warrior rose from the holographic card onto the field, in roman attire and the head of a powerful lion. "While I control no Spell or Trap Cards, my Gimmick Puppet of Leo can activate its effect to add 1 Destiny Counter to himself, by detaching a material.

"Add all the counters you want, 3200 ATK points aren't going to get through my beautiful Poem of Amour.

"You assume I summoned him to attack. Truth is, Amy, even ugly monsters can have devastating powers! Because when Gimmick Puppet of Leo gets his 3rd Destiny Counter, I automatically win the duel!" Mary had to add, "No strings attached."

"WHAT!" Amy was shocked at this news. Her entire strategy involved stopping her opponent from being able to inflict any damage, she had never faced a monster that didn't need to attack to defeat her. "No! I can stop this, I know I can. My Amour monsters can stop this!

"Draw! I use Chance of Amour's effect, discarding her and revealing Union of Amour! Now this turn, if I discard an Amour monster to activate its effect, I don't have to! Next, i'll use Poem of Amour's effect, revealing Union of Amour, to add this, my trump card to my hand!" Amy was freaking out, never before did she have to push herself to such limits in a race againsts Destiny. Maybe Mary did have her.

"Nice job Mary, you've got her on the run!" Lance encouraged.

~~~~~~~~

But now I can't perform my strategy this turn! I can't have any other Amour monsters in my hand, but I have two besides her! I can get one to the field, but the other; I'll have to wait one more turn. "I- I end my turn!"

~~~~~~~~

"Alright Amy, I'll start by activating Leo's effect again! 2 Destiny Counters, next turn I win the duel! But, before I end this turn, i'll set a card. Go ahead."

If I am right, then this card trap will be gone by my next turn, so i'll still be able to use Leo's effect.

"Good, good. My draw was perfect. I begin, by Summoning Star-Crossed Amour to the field!" a beautiful women jumped onto the field, smiling with her perfect body at all the boys in the audience. Then, she frowned at Mary, and pointed accusingly. "To Summon her, I have to return five Amours from my Graveyard to my Deck, but she gains 1000 ATK for any and all Amours still in the Graveyard. But, now I activate the effect of Union of Amour in my hand!"

Amy was pleased, frighteningly so. Some of the guys watching seemed a little less enthused by her beauty now.

"When I discard Union of Amour while I have no Amour monsters in my hand, every single Amour monster in my Deck is sent to the Graveyard! Which means, of course, my Star-Crossed Amour now has 28000 ATK points! So I can attack your ugly lion and smash your Life Points into the ground! Looks like Destiny is on my side, Mary!"

Mary's face-down card rose as Star-Crossed Amour came inches away from punching Gimmick Puppet of Leo across the room. The girl was hurtled backwards, hitting Poem of Amour behind her before both fell to the ground.

"Rule number 1 of dueling with Gimmick Puppets; always watch out for stray Mirror Forces."

Now all her monsters are destroyed, and as I predicted, my Spell zone is free of cards.

"And since it is now my turn, I activate Leo's effect for the final time, to win by the effect of Destiny!"

The holograms faded as Amy shed a tear, but hid her face in her arms. Mary approached her as the crowd of lovesick guys dissipated.

"I had fun, Amy." Mary said. "Your Amour monsters are brutal, and you did a great job with them."

"I don't need your pity!" Amy retorted.

"It isnt pity, Amy. Mary is praising you, and so am I." Lance was now standing next to Mary, also trying to comfort the near-sobbing girl. "Ive never seen a deck made of Hand Traps, and to be honest, it is really cool!"

"But you need to remember that beauty isn't everything. You put too much faith in the fact that you thought my monsters were ugly, and so you assumed I wouldn't be able to stop you. But you need cards that can stop things like Mirror Force."

Amy started to cheer up. She looked at Mary and Lance. "Thanks. I do have cards like that, but I sent them to the graveyard for Star-Crossed Amour. I guess that wasn't my smartest move!"

 

Now Mary, Lance and Amy all walked along, discussing the duel, as they headed in the direction Lance saw Trent's hair.[/spoiler]

[Delibirb]

Chapter 4 is here as well. It didn't take as long to write, because it is a fairly short duel. As such a good amount is just following Trent around the Tower. You can, however, download the YGOPRO replay here!

 

[spoiler='Chapter 4']Trent was ready; he was beaming with excitement and confidence. He was ready to duel, and ready to win!

He walked through the gates, happily declaring his favorite monster. The man said Nightmare Shark was an interesting choice for a Gishki Deck.

Which is why I play him, and why he’s my favorite. Summon a Rank 3 WATER monster and, then use that as a material for Black Ray Lancer; and 2600 ATK to boot? Yes please.

Now Trent just needed to find an opponent. Most everyone was dueling, so it could be difficult. Didn't that rich guy say some of the elevators were hidden? Maybe I’ll go look for some.

Trent scoured the outer walls of the Tower for any suspicious architecture or decoration. There were quite a few couches and tables for sitting, talking, and of course dueling. Not everyone was here for the tournament after all; some people just want to play for fun. So did Trent, but he also liked to compete with his friends.

Then Trent tripped, there was a step onto short platform section of the floor. There weren’t many people up here, probably due to the distinct lack of elevators. But there was a duel going on in the center of it. Looks like Dark Worlds dueling Fableds. Sounds fun!

Hm, if there are no elevators on here… Would it be a good spot to look for a secret one?

Trent thought he might as well. He started feeling up and down the wallpaper for a button or panel, something that would open up a secret door. Eventually he got bored and sat on a couch to watch the duel on the platform.

The Dark Worlds player had Grapha on the field already, but it appeared to be the Fabled Player’s turn, and he was smirking. It could have been anyone’s game, but Trent lost attention. He was looking above the duel, at the ceiling with the Holographic Projectors.

That’s funny. One of the Projectors wasn’t moving. It was just pointing, and not at the duel. First few hours of the tournament and something is already broken.

He followed the field of vision of the projectors; it was pointing, he thought, to the couch across the room, on the other side of the duel. He decided he would head over there afterwards, see what was up.

The duel finally ended in Fabled’s favor, though Trent wasn’t exactly sure how. He was fixated on the couch; sure it would be a secret door or passage.

Let me see; don’t want to attract too much attention while I look around here. Trent sat down on the couch. When no one was looking he would stick his hands between the cushions, under the arms, around the back if he could reach.

Maybe it isn’t the couch it’s looking at. Trent thought to himself. Maybe it is under the couch?

He made sure one last time no one was looking, and then peeked under the sofa. A secret panel! He pressed down on it; the panel made a click sound, then something in front of Trent started making a louder noise. He looked up.

The broken projector was descending from the ceiling – so much for being secretive about it – bringing down a large tube! As it got closer to the ground, a door slid open to reveal a small elevator carriage.

Well now that I’ve found it, it isn’t all that secret.

He walked in; he could still be the first to use it, even if he wouldn’t be the last.

When he got up to the second floor, there were only 6 or 7 other people nearby. There was only one duel he could see. It was significantly cooler up here, more like a purple art-deco theme going on - lots of rounded edges, whites, purples, and ultraviolet lights. Pretty neat.

Then one of the people approached him. Wait a second, isn’t that the guy who surveyed me when I came in?

“Hello Trent. You seem to remember me. Yeah, I don’t work for the tournament; I’m just dueling here for fun.” The man asked.

“Then why did you ask everyone their name and favorite monster and stuff?” Trent recalled what he had said about his own, Number 47: Nightmare Shark.

“Research, you could say. But that isn't important. What’s important is the fun of dueling. Are you here to win?”

“I mean, I would be happy if I won, but I mostly come to these things to enjoy myself with my friends. I don’t know where they are though.”

“What are their monsters?” this guy seemed really intent on people’s cards.

“Um, well Mary’s is Gimmick Puppet of Strings, but I don’t-“ Trent was interrupted.

“Oh yeah, I remember her. Anyway, want to duel while you wait for them?”

“What?” Trent was surprised by the question from nowhere.

“Well, based on what – Mary, you said? – Uses, she will probably be up here shortly. And since we are both here to have fun, why not duel?” the guy was making sense.

“OK, why not?!” Trent was exited, his first duel of the tournament!

The two walked a short distance from each other as the panels on the floors lit up; up here, the floor was a holographic projector. Their dueldisks unfolded, both staring intently at one another, but smiling with giddiness. “I’m Kay by the way.”

“Hey Kay, you already know me.” Trent replied, “I’ll start! Draw!”

Nice hand, I should be able to Summon Zealgigas first turn! "I Summon Gishki Abyss, who allows me to search my deck for another Gishki monster with less than 1000 DEF points, so I choose my Gishki Shadow!”

“I love playing with Gishkis, but they move so fast sometimes it’s hard to keep up!” Kay interjected. He was right, Gishkis were a very fast deck, but Trent was a slow thinker, he had difficulty planning out a strategy for the whole duel. He preferred to go a turn at a time. Trent smiled, and Key returned the gesture.

“Now I discard Gishki Shadow to add Gishki Aquamirror to my hand, which I will then activate! By Tributing Gishki Zealgigas from my hand,” here it comes! “I can Ritual Summon another Gishki Zealgigas!”

A great four armed aquatic behemoth climbed out of the floor, eager to crush the competition. With a 3200 ATK body, it was unlikely he wouldn't be able to.

“Now I use Aquamirror’s effect in the Graveyard, returning it to my deck to add the Zealgigas I tributed back to my hand!” Trent was exited; with no Strings to pull Zealgigas into the grave, it wasn't likely Kay would be able to follow up with anything strong enough to stop him! “Your turn, Kay!”

“Cool, and thanks! Now, let me see. I Normal Summon my House Duston,” five adorable little fuzzballs of different colors popped out from the floor and started to orbit eachother. “and activate One for One! By discarding a monster, I can Special Summon any Level 1 monster from my Deck, so I choose Goblin King!”

A small, angry little thing on a dark throne ascended from the floor. The dust particle monsters began to dance around it now.

“Now, House Duston, attack his Gishki Abyss, destroying yourself – inflicting 800 damage to me – and activating your effect, to flood the field!” The dust particles suddenly became vicious in appearance as they rammed themselves into the shark-man. As they exploded, larger versions of them appeared on Kay’s side of the field; A yellow, a green, and another set of five mini ones. But then, more Duston monsters appeared next to Trent’s monsters!

“What is this?!” Trent was bewildered. A green, blue, and red Duston rose from the floor, joining his Gishki monsters and dancing around them. They were in attack mode with 0 ATK points!

“When House Duston is destroyed, I can Special Summon as many Duston monsters as I want anywhere on the field, as long as I place the same number on both sides. Now, as my Goblin King gains 1000 ATK for every other Fiend-Type monster on the field, and all my Dustons are Fiends, he has 6000 ATK points!”

This was insane, on his first move Kay was able to make a monster with nearly double the strength as Trent’s strongest monster!

“Now, Goblin King, attack his Red Duston!” The little monster smiled, and ran itself into the dwarf on his throne, inflicting 6000 damage to Trent’s Life Points. “Oh, and when a Duston is destroyed, they each have an effect that activates as well. For instance, Red Duston inflicts 500 damage to its controller; you.”

Trent had only 1500 Life Points left, and it was only the second turn of the duel! “Unfortunately, with one less Fiend on the field, my Goblin King now has only 5000 ATK.” Only 5000? That is an insane number!

“My move!” These little monsters are really annoying. “Oh, and I guess I should warn you since you are using a Ritual deck, Dustons cannot be used as Tributes, or Xyz Materials, or Synchro Materials, or Fusion Materials. Really the only thing they are good for, for you, is being destroyed!” Kay added.

Nothing in Trent’s hand was of any use now, so he moved into the Battle Phase. My Zealgigas isn’t strong enough to destroy Goblin King, so I’ll take out the next best thing. “Gishki Zealgigas, attack House Duston!” The puff monsters exploded, and another Red Duston appeared next to Zealgigas. No! Not another one! “Trent, you should have payed more attention, House Duston can still Summon one Duston to both of our fields. I’ll take my last House Duston.”

This guy seemed nice at first, but this is just ridiculous! “I guess I switch all of my monsters except Red Duston and Zealgigas to defense mode, and end my turn.” I can’t switch Red Duston to defense position, so his Goblin King can still attack. “Wait! Before I end my turn!” He remembered something.

“I use Gishki Zealgigas’ effect, sacrificing 1000 Life Points,” this was a huge gamble, but he had to try it, or his loss would be assured anyway, “To draw a card, and if it is a Gishki card, I can shuffle one card anywhere on the field into its owner’s deck!” Trent drew, a Gishki Zealgigas! “Yes, I reveal the Gishki monster I just drew, and return your Goblin King to your deck!”

“Nice one, Trent!” Kay drew his card, “But, I’m sorry, it just wasn’t good enough. I Normal Summon my second Goblin King, to attack your Red Duston, and end this duel!” Again, the red little monster ran itself into the short stubby king, inflicting 6000 battle damage and 500 effect damage to Trent. He had only 500 Life Points at that point, so he lost by a longshot.

Trent looked up after gathering his cards back into his deck – he wanted to congratulate Kay, and ask for more help finding his friends – but Kay was gone.

“Here, he was headed over to this platform, Mary!” Trent said as they ran past and around a number of duels up to the higher up area. A small crowd had gathered up there.

“Look Lance, an elevator! Looks like Trent went up there, then.” Mary replied.

“Who’d have guessed Trent would be the first one of use on the next floor?” Lance was slightly astounded. Trent was definitely better than Lance, but he didn’t have the focus to get as far as Mary, at least not faster than she did.

They clamored their way through the people to get on the next elevator car up, where they found Trent. He looked at them, and they at him.

“I’m sorry, Trent.” Lance apologized. He knew Trent’s face when he lost, and lost bad.

“What was it, Trent?” asked a consoling Mary.

“I don’t even know.”
[/spoiler]

[legendhiro]

I've only read the first chapter, and I want to preface this statement with the fact that I do like the story so far, but there is one thing that I feel you really need to work on. While you are really good at describing actions, and your dialogue and pacing seems good, there are few, if any, descriptions of places or people. You mention someone using Venom Swamp at one point, but you never describe the treacherous environment of the swamp, or how either of the battling Duelists seemed to react to standing within it. You mention Scrap Dragon, but you don't describe it, except to say that it is a machine. You mention a booming voice reverberating off of the "smaller skyscrapers", but this city and its overall scale were never descibed so this means nothing to the reader. If you want to keep the story at a certain pace, its true that adding lengthy descriptions can cause it to lag a bit, but you need to include something, i.e. "The tallest of the buildings were practically moumental, as big as any you'd see when visting the largest of cities. Even the smaller buildings were quite large in scale."

 

There is also the issue of describing people. Even an idea of height, bone structure and hair color can give a character much more of an identity. People with no identity are boring, and they can really make the story boring as a whole. You introduced a fair number of characters in the first chapter alone, but I really couldn't tell you anything about them, even having just read it.

 

As I said, the narative itself is interesting so far, and I will keep reading for the time being in the hopes that it remains that way, and that the storytelling improves. I'm in no way a writing expert, but I acknowledge that every writer is always growing, and I don't hold the current deficiencies of the story against the ideas it presents. Good luck as you continue this going forward.

 

*Edit* So I read on a bit more. Your descriptions of places definitely get better as the story progresses. By chapter four you are at the point where I would feel that a story such as this would need to be in that regard, but I think my point regarding the descriptions of people and the monsters and effects in the duels themselves stands. It's true that you are writing for a crowd which should already know the appearence of these monsters, but it never hurts to describe them a bit when they appear. You describe your own Armour monsters (which I love by the way) well enough, but not the monsters battling them, and their effects never seen to get a description. You descibe the Venom monsters very well, but not the Heroics. You continue to do a good job describing the actions, reactions, and motivations of your characters, but I still can't picture most of them in my head because I know nothing about how they look, or their mannerisms. Do any of them swagger, suggesting confidence, or maybe overconfidence? Do their expressions seem to line up with their words, or could they maybe be hiding something? These simple things can really drive a story forward, and be useful in turning the story toward an unexpected direction when the need arises.

[Delibirb]

Thanks for the feedback! I definitely need work on the descriptions of places and people, I've known that. I guess I just get caught up and exited in describing the events that I forget that I'm not writing down how the events look. But, I will continue to work on that. I'm glad you like the story; I was a bit worried people would be bothered about the complete lack of continuity with ZEXAL, and of course in using created cards.

[legendhiro]

I definitely need work on the descriptions of places and people, I've known that. I guess I just get caught up and exited in describing the events that I forget that I'm not writing down how the events look.

I'm often the same way when I write. It's easy to get caught up in what's coming out of your own inagination sometimes.

 

 

I'm glad you like the story; I was a bit worried people would be bothered about the complete lack of continuity with ZEXAL, and of course in using created cards.

 

 

I personally love created cards, so long as they're balanced. I use some myself in my stories, though never really whole archetypes as you have.

 

I'm honestly not sure where in the continuity of Yu-Gi-Oh! the ZaXal anime actually falls, except "the future and whatever :P", so play as fast and loose with it as  you want. If someone gets bothered, just say that this is an alternate future or something.

 

P.S. I love that Relinquished Unbound card. Don't know if you realized, but the Japanese name for Relinquished is, I believe, Sacrifice, which would make your guy "Unbound Sacrifice", which just sounds cool :D

[Delibirb]

I'm often the same way when I write. It's easy to get caught up in what's coming out of your own inagination sometimes.

 

 

 

 

 

 

I personally love created cards, so long as they're balanced. I use some myself in my stories, though never really whole archetypes as you have.

 

I'm honestly not sure where in the continuity of Yu-Gi-Oh! the ZaXal anime actually falls, except "the future and whatever :P", so play as fast and loose with it as  you want. If someone gets bothered, just say that this is an alternate future or something.

 

P.S. I love that Relinquished Unbound card. Don't know if you realized, but the Japanese name for Relinquished is, I believe, Sacrifice, which would make your guy "Unbound Sacrifice", which just sounds cool :D

Number 0 will be playing a role in a later arc for this story, and the name is important for that. >:{P

[legendhiro]

Number 0 will be playing a role in a later arc for this story, and the name is important for that. >:{P

Sounds cool. I'm looking forward to seeing it in action.