Umbra Posted November 14, 2012 Author Report Share Posted November 14, 2012 [b]Matt[/b]: College has definitely been the main drawback so far - last week was pretty busy - but from here on out I should be good to go. Next chapter is underway, and should be coming soon. [b]Neo: [/b]Kace is a character you'll get to know more over the following chapters, and who knows, he might even become likeable. As for the uncertain protagonist, I like it that way. Makes it less about good and evil, and more "this is what happens". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Synchronized Posted November 14, 2012 Report Share Posted November 14, 2012 [quote name='Umbra' timestamp='1352860840' post='6068911'] [b]Matt[/b]: College has definitely been the main drawback so far - last week was pretty busy - but from here on out I should be good to go. Next chapter is underway, and should be coming soon. [b]Neo: [/b]Kace is a character you'll get to know more over the following chapters, and who knows, he might even become likeable. As for the uncertain protagonist, I like it that way. Makes it less about good and evil, and more "this is what happens". [/quote] Different perspective than I'm used to but I definitely am intrigued by it. Looking forward to the next Chapter and your review as well. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
?someone? Posted November 18, 2012 Report Share Posted November 18, 2012 Hate to be the one to poop in the punch, but I am unable to see anything in the first chapter. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Umbra Posted November 19, 2012 Author Report Share Posted November 19, 2012 That's,,, really odd. I'm heading out right now, but I'll try to fix that when I get back. In the meantime, try using a different browser. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
unknowed Posted November 23, 2012 Report Share Posted November 23, 2012 Very good detail but the size of the "heartsteel blade" is unbelievable if it was used inside but that is nit picky. Love the story anyways so far. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Umbra Posted February 9, 2013 Author Report Share Posted February 9, 2013 Alright, so that "next week" shenanigans I was on about a couple of months ago was obviously just that, shenanigans. Things changed, life got in the way, and I had to devote myself to other things. Now, however, life has slowed down just a little, which gives me some time to write. Chapter Two: A Black Blade is available in the first post, picking up where we left off. However, I suggest you re-read the first chapter and the prologue; the story is very much a continuation of both from here on out, and I wouldn't want you to have forgotten that part before we move on. Yes, move on. This time, I actually intend to keep that promise. War in the Dustlands will be a weekly installment from here on out, giving you another chapter in the tale of San Perdon Wylde and Kace Harmon on their strange journey across the war-torn Dustlands, looking for something that may be much closer than they first thought. If I can keep the momentum up, that is, but I will do my best to keep the story going. Also, long-time readers of my stories may notice a few familiarities in there. Those are very much intended. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Synchronized Posted February 22, 2013 Report Share Posted February 22, 2013 Okay, so just finished Chapter 2, and I'm somewhat confused. Let me clarify, it was fantastic. Like we talked about on Facebook, it's just such a different feel than most stories, you know it's a medieval tale, yet it's written in modern standards and the dialogue is quite good. It's a very gripping story that's very much easy to picture. What confused me was the end there. Darle's son, do we see what happens to him? Is that the same one that's implied when they went into the room? Because I'm like not sure I understood everything I was supposed to understand. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Umbra Posted February 23, 2013 Author Report Share Posted February 23, 2013 Darle's son is mentioned as early as the prologue, which is why I suggested you read the earlier chapters again. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Synchronized Posted February 23, 2013 Report Share Posted February 23, 2013 Darle's son is mentioned as early as the prologue, which is why I suggested you read the earlier chapters again. Alright, that makes sense; I remember that now. What confused me was the scene where the two apprentice's go in and they're all like "We should've been there", and I thought that was like real-time, his son was being killed right then and there. It was just a disconnect on my part because I had a little trouble following. (I'm not the best reader, I have the attention span of a goldfish so I get distracted extremely easily.) Okay, so I have to say one of the things I really like about this (and I'm one of those people who is almost always interested and/or intrigued by Medieval tales, is just how well fleshed out the characters are only two Chapters in. It's so well written and I like the way Perdon just comes across in dialogue as such an experienced, war-tried veteran without even having to say much. It's really a testament to your amazing writing ability but it's something I wish I had the ability to convey, it's so well done and it makes it so that when you're reading it's easy to just be pulled right into the story. You do so much with so little, and that's when you know you're a great writer. I'm interested to see what happens with Perdon's apprentice. I'm not good with names so forgive me for not knowing everything off the top of my head yet, but once I get a few more Chapters in, I'll remember everything easily. I like the way he contradicts and contrasts Perdon's character so well that you know eventually once the plot starts to thicken, things are going to become extremely intense. You've got the makings of a perfect character relationship there and I'm immensely looking forward to seeing it progress. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Umbra Posted February 23, 2013 Author Report Share Posted February 23, 2013 That's part of the reason why I ask readers to re-read the earlier chapters - it's been a while, and something like that could easily be confusing if you don't keep all the details in mind. The next chapter will reveal more about what actually happened, and prepare you for the rest of the journey. Thank you. Character development has been a strong suit of mine for a while now, and it's good to see that I haven't forgotten my old skills. Perdon's and Kace's relationship will definitely be one of the central themes of the story, along with the political situation in the Dustlands itself. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Umbra Posted March 6, 2013 Author Report Share Posted March 6, 2013 Alright, time for a belated update. Chapter Three, Stranger, can be found in the opening post, finally getting us out of Misthill and onto the start of our great adventure. They will soon find out that life on the road is not all that it is made out to be, not in a country ravaged by destruction and disloyalty. As per usual, I would recommend that any new readers start out by reading the prologue and then going forward: this is not the kind of story you can just jump into mid-story. We may only be three chapters in, but there's a whole lot of story in those three chapters. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Synchronized Posted March 7, 2013 Report Share Posted March 7, 2013 A really well-done Chapter, though that's no surprise. What I like (and really have to commend you for) is how much of a likeable character Kace has become. In the Prologue and the 1st Chapter I didn't see how I could get behind him as a character at all, but I still maintain that was intentional and he's becoming much more "down to Earth", I guess would be the best way to say it, as the story picks up and progresses. Of course, I'm still not sure if he's the main character, or if Perdon is, or what the hell is going on because we haven't established how fantasy-based this is yet, but that doesn't mean the ride itself isn't thrilling. I must say too, I like your writing style in the way you break up the text and stuff so that it doesn't seem so long, but the reading itself definitely is. In a good way. I might try and adapt that style myself to see how well it works. Really good and it ended on a good note, not a cliffhanger, which is cool. Again, something I need to learn how to do better, but somehow it's just hard to resist that suspense. Very much anticipating the next one. Don't forget you owe me a review too :P Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Umbra Posted March 27, 2013 Author Report Share Posted March 27, 2013 Things are getting kicked into high gear with Chapter 4: A Righteous Man, available for your viewing pleasure in the opening post. We make a few new friends on the road west, and have an intense encounter with one of the many strangers who live outside the law. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Synchronized Posted April 1, 2013 Report Share Posted April 1, 2013 That was absolutely fantastic. I'm not sure what you meant when you said you were at a standstill because the Chapter flew by and was a much more entertaining read then any of the others. Still don't like Kace. Absolutely loved the references. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Warden Posted April 6, 2013 Report Share Posted April 6, 2013 You've been, wait for it... [url=http://forum.yugiohcardmaker.net/topic/299580-wait-for-it-heart-breakers-episode-1-metal-gear-camellia/?p=6176152]HEART BROKEN![/url] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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