Lonk Posted September 2, 2012 Report Share Posted September 2, 2012 I am feeling lonely irl. I look around and see that my younger brother had lost all interests that had associated me with him (and he has friends who have his current interests to rub salt on the wound), my mom has many friends, and I feel like I only have my turtle to keep me company. I think I have been trying to get attention just to mask my loneliness, because I feel that not many people I know share with me in my interests or have opposite interests that I despise (using brother from before, him talking continuously about Beats and really mainstream music, really!?). I'm not sure if this is manifested in the loss of my younger brother or if I am insecure about myself. Anyways, discuss loneliness and all of the troubles it brings. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marisa Kirisame-ze Posted September 2, 2012 Report Share Posted September 2, 2012 Loneliness is tough. I think every teenager stays up at night just because of sheer loneliness. But I think you have to indulge yourself in both sides of the spectrum to never be lonely: make friends like you and make friends the opposite of you. I've figured out that with that, it's hard to get lonely. You'll always have someone there. And you'll be reaching out for more alone time than times with your groups of friends. That's how it is for me, so maybe I've beaten loneliness. But then again, a girlfriend would be nice, huh. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lonk Posted September 2, 2012 Author Report Share Posted September 2, 2012 [quote name='Marisa Kirisame-ze' timestamp='1346546896' post='6017588'] But I think you have to indulge yourself in both sides of the spectrum to never be lonely: make friends like you and make friends the opposite of you. I've figured out that with that, it's hard to get lonely. You'll always have someone there. And you'll be reaching out for more alone time than times with your groups of friends. [/quote] I only have indirect friends that like the opposite of what I like :/ Plus, I don't know where to look. Besides, it's one of the reasons why I am on YCM, because I know that there are people here who share the same interests as I do and I don't feel as insignificant or insecure. Other than that, I just feel sometimes that I am alone. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aerion Brightflame Posted September 2, 2012 Report Share Posted September 2, 2012 I always feel alone, becuase I'm in the annoying situation of never quite fitting in any group. I get on with most, but never fit in any. So i rarely make friends. That and I have rejection issues.And my hobbies aren't exactly popular, so I've adjusted to being alone. Still hurts thought. However, I try my best to combat it. Mostly through talking to myself, since I've found that if i rely on others to help combat it, I come across as to needy and drive them away, thereby not solving the problem. But it's suprising how intellectual a conversation with yourself can be. I keep myself going for most of the time, but I miss the good times where I didn't feel lonely. -sighes- Oh well, the past is the past. As much as I want it to return it never will. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lonk Posted September 2, 2012 Author Report Share Posted September 2, 2012 [quote name='Archbaron Barthandelus' timestamp='1346547239' post='6017593'] I always feel alone, becuase I'm in the annoying situation of never quite fitting in any group. I get on with most, but never fit in any. So i rarely make friends. That and I have rejection issues.And my hobbies aren't exactly popular, so I've adjusted to being alone. Still hurts thought. However, I try my best to combat it. Mostly through talking to myself, since I've found that if i rely on others to help combat it, I come across as to needy and drive them away, thereby not solving the problem. But it's suprising how intellectual a conversation with yourself can be. I keep myself going for most of the time, but I miss the good times where I didn't feel lonely. -sighes- Oh well, the past is the past. As much as I want it to return it never will. [/quote] I know how you feel 110%. I just think in philosophical terms while I am alone with nothing to do. I question about the purpose of the universe and the importance of existence, only to share it with the family and have me think that I am crazy and say that I should stop thinking. It just feels so painful if being alone with no one to understand. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aerion Brightflame Posted September 2, 2012 Report Share Posted September 2, 2012 I never share with my parents. Becuase i don't want them to worry. and they would never understand. There are only I think 2 people in the world i share my innermost thoughts with. One is insane like myself. And the other is kind one of the reasons I'm alone. But, i can trust them for better and for worse. and it helps. A bit. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Darth Revan of the Sith Posted September 2, 2012 Report Share Posted September 2, 2012 Patience is a virtue. You never know when one bump could lead to a long lasting friendship. Or a potential, insanely superstitious, stalker. [s]I should know.[/s] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lonk Posted September 2, 2012 Author Report Share Posted September 2, 2012 I always have to tell my family what my compulsive thoughts are just to soothe the pain a bit. Unfortunately, it only ends up exacerbating it when they ignore it or think that I am crazy for it. It's an aggressive loop. Sometimes, I feel that doing things when I am lonely loses its spice, as the pain ends up getting rid of the seasoning. Hopefully, I will find that significant other sooner or later. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aerion Brightflame Posted September 2, 2012 Report Share Posted September 2, 2012 I found my significant other. After 10 months we failed. Now we are friends, and I am stuck still being in love with her. It's irritating, and she is the reason I feel so lonely half the time. Since I got bitter which lost me my friends, and i was to bitter to get anymore. And yet she is the only proper friend I have. Sigh... Damn life and its complexities. Why can't things be simple for once. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lonk Posted September 2, 2012 Author Report Share Posted September 2, 2012 [quote name='Archbaron Barthandelus' timestamp='1346549286' post='6017625'] I found my significant other. After 10 months we failed. Now we are friends, and I am stuck still being in love with her. It's irritating, and she is the reason I feel so lonely half the time. Since I got bitter which lost me my friends, and i was to bitter to get anymore. And yet she is the only proper friend I have. Sigh... Damn life and its complexities. Why can't things be simple for once. [/quote] I'm sorry about how that went for you. Life if full of complexities. Without complexities though, it would feel just the same as being alone, for the rest of your life. At least you have a proper friend. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Yasu Posted September 2, 2012 Report Share Posted September 2, 2012 I'm already used to it, I can take care of myself so it's fine. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EliminateHRN Posted September 2, 2012 Report Share Posted September 2, 2012 I've always called myself a loner because I don't have many friends. Honestly, most of my friends are online, the only person I know in real life that I would consider a true "friend" would be my sister. I don't know why I have more friends online than I do in real life, I just seem to have more in common with people I meet online than I do with people in my personal life. So...I've always been a bit lonely because of lack of real life friends, but that's not really why I posted here. Ever since the break-up with my ex nearly two months ago, I've became really lonely. I know, it's almost been two months ago since we ended and I need to get over it and I am, slowly, but I still became really lonely. I don't know why I've been so lonely since the break-up, it was a long distance relationship and we were never "together" personally. We just talked through Facebook and Skype. But I still became really lonely after we ended and, like I said, I'm not sure why. Maybe because I was possibly the happiest I have ever been while we were in a relationship and she was the only person (ever) that actually gave a damn about what was bothering me and helped me through it no matter what she had planned that day, so after we broke up, I guess I just feel like I don't have anyone. I don't know, I've just been really lonely since we ended. I started rambling again, I apologize if I made no damn since. But, yeah, I'm really lonely and I don't know what to do about it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aerion Brightflame Posted September 2, 2012 Report Share Posted September 2, 2012 [quote name='Shadow Avian' timestamp='1346616084' post='6017993'] I've always called myself a loner because I don't have many friends. Honestly, most of my friends are online, the only person I know in real life that I would consider a true "friend" would be my sister. I don't know why I have more friends online than I do in real life, I just seem to have more in common with people I meet online than I do with people in my personal life. So...I've always been a bit lonely because of lack of real life friends, but that's not really why I posted here. Ever since the break-up with my ex nearly two months ago, I've became really lonely. I know, it's almost been two months ago since we ended and I need to get over it and I am, slowly, but I still became really lonely. I don't know why I've been so lonely since the break-up, it was a long distance relationship and we were never "together" personally. We just talked through Facebook and Skype. But I still became really lonely after we ended and, like I said, I'm not sure why. Maybe because I was possibly the happiest I have ever been while we were in a relationship and she was the only person (ever) that actually gave a damn about what was bothering me and helped me through it no matter what she had planned that day, so after we broke up, I guess I just feel like I don't have anyone. I don't know, I've just been really lonely since we ended. I started rambling again, I apologize if I made no damn since. But, yeah, I'm really lonely and I don't know what to do about it. [/quote] I swear whenever I read stuff you say its like looking back over my life. It's hard when someone you trust with your life completely lets you go. And I don't know what to say to try and fix it, becuase I'm still in the same place. Futher along but the same place none the less. As much as saying just grow up and deal with it should be the way to help... it just doesn't. All I can do is offer a compastionate ear that is always willing to listen, and an obsessive brain will to try and talk things out. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EliminateHRN Posted September 2, 2012 Report Share Posted September 2, 2012 [quote name='Archbaron Barthandelus' timestamp='1346616537' post='6017996'] I swear whenever I read stuff you say its like looking back over my life. It's hard when someone you trust with your life completely lets you go. And I don't know what to say to try and fix it, becuase I'm still in the same place. Futher along but the same place none the less. As much as saying just grow up and deal with it should be the way to help... it just doesn't. All I can do is offer a compastionate ear that is always willing to listen, and an obsessive brain will to try and talk things out. [/quote] Oh, I apologize if my posts reminds you of times you much rather forget. Yeah, it is, especially for me who has major trust issues. Like I already stated a couple of times, it's nearly two months since the relationship ended and I still have strong feelings for the girl, but I figured out being depressed all the time won't help and I have started trying to not be as depressed (I probably worded that horribly, but whatever). Also, I'm still good friends with my ex (I would consider her my best friend xD) and, surprisingly, it helps a bit. Given time, I'm sure I'll get over it, but I don't know how long that'll be. Yeah, I always tell that to everyone, I'm always hear if you need someone to talk too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aerion Brightflame Posted September 2, 2012 Report Share Posted September 2, 2012 It's fine. No worse that what my head subjects me to. As, again. I understand all, and mirrors all of that. except I've relapsed back into the depressive part sadly. And she's is both the rock and the bane of my life to put it poetically. I'm worried though, now that I've lost my old group of friends, with my trust/confidence issues will I make a new one. odds are...no. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gαr Posted September 2, 2012 Report Share Posted September 2, 2012 The only loneliness I worry about is that people will never truly understand me and my interests. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EliminateHRN Posted September 2, 2012 Report Share Posted September 2, 2012 I understand. Don't worry, I have little minor relapses into my depression at least once a week. I'm sure your depressions will go away sooner or later. I'm sure you'll make a new group of friends at some point. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sunshine Jesse Posted September 2, 2012 Report Share Posted September 2, 2012 Loneliness while in a long-distance relationship sucks, especially when it's mutual. It's even more infuriating when it'd be easy to close the distance under even -slightly- different circumstances. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blake Posted September 3, 2012 Report Share Posted September 3, 2012 [quote name='Nightmare Zarkus' timestamp='1346620762' post='6018038'] Loneliness while in a long-distance relationship sucks, especially when it's mutual. It's even more infuriating when it'd be easy to close the distance under even -slightly- different circumstances. [/quote] Took the words out of my mouth. Well, that and loneliness is both my worst enemy and nigh constant companion, much to my distaste. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nathanael D. Striker Posted September 3, 2012 Report Share Posted September 3, 2012 A topic I can relate to? TBH, I'm not that close to my irl friends. I'm closer to my online friends than my irl friends most of the time. Most of the time, I feel lonely in spite of people calling me outgoing. To add salt to my wounds, most of my friends are dating while I'm still single. I'm too shy for my own good, but I seem to be opening up lately. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gαr Posted September 3, 2012 Report Share Posted September 3, 2012 [quote name='Archbaron Striker' timestamp='1346648600' post='6018274'] A topic I can relate to? TBH, I'm not that close to my irl friends. I'm closer to my online friends than my irl friends most of the time. Most of the time, I feel lonely in spite of people calling me outgoing. To add salt to my wounds, most of my friends are dating while I'm still single. I'm too shy for my own good, but I seem to be opening up lately. [/quote] I know that feel, bro. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Darth Revan of the Sith Posted September 3, 2012 Report Share Posted September 3, 2012 Don't you guys worry. If you guys ever need company I will always be there for you. All you have to do is turn around and I will be there with open arms. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marisa Kirisame-ze Posted September 3, 2012 Report Share Posted September 3, 2012 [IMG]http://i50.tinypic.com/nqsmxh.jpg[/IMG] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bull3tM0nk3y Posted September 4, 2012 Report Share Posted September 4, 2012 I feel for ya... sorta... At least you're not Michael Collins of Apollo 11. He had to stay in orbit around the moon to make sure that the two on the ground were able to come back to earth. He was on the other side of the moon, and had no contact with anyone for ether 45 mintues or 15 hours. I can't remember. He says it was the saddest moment of his life. No one would have known that he would have died until he came back around. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BehindTheMask Posted September 4, 2012 Report Share Posted September 4, 2012 When I was in solitary retreat, I knew that I was together with all sentient beings in innumerable worlds. Even though I seemed to be alone in a small, enclosed room, actually I was in company with many ants who found their way inside, and there were many insects around the hut who created all kinds of sounds in the evening. When I opened the Sutras, people thousands of years in the past were talking to me. How could I feel lonely? Some people think I must feel lonely being a monk without any wife or children. Not at all. I have the 5 precepts and the 10 Virtuous Deeds as my wife, and my children are all the people who I have developed a karmic affinity with and who call me Shih-fu. It is only those pitiable people who enclose themselves and cannot establish a relationship with the outside world who feel lonely. If you keep yourself enclosed, even if you live among thousands of people you will still feel very lonely. However, if you keep yourself open, then even if you are living alone, you will still have a very full life. So open your mind and treat everyone as your intimate, virtuous friend. [i]from a [url="http://www.chan1.org/ddp/channews/03-1981.html"]lecture[/url] by Shih-fu Sheng-ye[/i] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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