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The Society of Cryptozoologists


Admiral Tim

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Weeeeell, me and my dad go on a fishing trip up to Canada every summer with some of his friends. We go out into, basically the middle of nowhere, and fish all day and eat. The area we stay in is completely surrounded by thick forest. One day I was out walking by myself because being around a bunch of drunken men in their 40's can get a little annoying. While I was walking, I saw something move out of the corner of my eye. I quickly turned to see what it was and saw a very tall, upright something walking a little bit away from the edge of the forest. I looked closer and saw it was all white and had what I could perceive as long downy hair. Before I could get a really good look at it, it took off further into the forest. I was a little to scared to follow it and also didn't have any camera of sorts with me, so I just let it go. I don't really know what I saw.

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Though why would an old fat man (Who never dies.) live in solitude with only his wife and small gnome like creatures called elves. Also picks a freezing cold place. Then the whole flying reindeer just defies science plus they can't do all the houses in that time without spending only a few microseconds at each one. Plus all the gifts would need incredibly powerful deer and a huge sleigh.

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He'd be moving too fast for the human body to handle.

We'll assume even only one-hundred million people on Earth celebrated Christmas. On the night of Christmas Eve (we could say 10 PM to 8 AM), he has ten hours to, if every family consisted of four people, deliver gifts to twenty-five million homes. That becomes two and a half million houses an hour and two-hundred and fifty thousand houses every six minutes. No matter how agile he was, most houses don't even have chimneys (as of my knowledge) anymore.

This math also states he'd have to reach six-hundred ninety-four or more houses every second. This is, of course, only assuming there are one-hundred million Christians.
There are two point two billion.

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[quote name='Avaritia' timestamp='1324671940' post='5725697']
He'd be moving too fast for the human body to handle.

We'll assume even only one-hundred million people on Earth celebrated Christmas. On the night of Christmas Eve (we could say 10 PM to 8 AM), he has ten hours to, if every family consisted of four people, deliver gifts to twenty-five million homes. That becomes two and a half million houses an hour and two-hundred and fifty thousand houses every six minutes. No matter how agile he was, most houses don't even have chimneys (as of my knowledge) anymore.

This math also states he'd have to reach six-hundred ninety-four or more houses every second. This is, of course, only assuming there are one-hundred million Christians.
There are two point two billion.
[/quote]

To give him a bit of slack, you give him an eleven hour span, really it could be much longer as they are spread throughout different timezones. But frankly it's impossible. The best theory I have is multiple santas?

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Santa's obviously based on 'Sinterklaas', a Catholic Saint who's B-Day is honoured in the Netherlands and Belgium. When Dutch settlers came to the USA, the English settlers mistook 'Sinterklaas' for Santa Claus then it mixed with the img of god Odin/Wodan. Add some more Coca-Cola commercials and you have Santa.

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[quote name='Lexadin' timestamp='1326014603' post='5754184']
And his elfes are a non-rasist version (as American's are really fearfull of being that) the freed negro-slave that Sinterklaas bought free. And who was so thankfull of him that he decides to help him.
Just multiply it.
[/quote]

I didn't know blacks were midgets?

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[quote name='Lexadin' timestamp='1326298971' post='5759343']
Well they changed them to them.
In my country Sinterklaas is a cryptoid. He's like 2000-years-old, has an army of 'zwarte pieten' and can run over the rooftops with his white horse...
Still makes more sence then Santa imo.
[/quote]

Ya, big fat man in red, with bells and flying deer....

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[quote name='Lexadin' timestamp='1326897877' post='5769845']
I really don't have much else to contribute... Here in the Netherlands there aren't any cryptics (besides the ones we know don't really exist) left.
[/quote]

I'm in Canada, the only big one everybody knows is the Sasquatch....

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[quote name='Lexadin' timestamp='1327076997' post='5772512']
I checked on some sources, and I discovered that in the Southern parts of the Netherlands they have... Something that's probebly most simulair to a Demon-motorgang on wild Boars. Or at least that's what the legends say.
[/quote]

How can it be called a motor gang if they ride boars?

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