Jump to content

The Tale of Gagagigo


Cozmosus

Recommended Posts

Well, I thought I may as well because it's so fun to say Gagagigo Giga Gagagigo Gogiga Gagagigo. Based upon the cards that feature Gagagigo in a more detailed fashion. My first fanfic, so expect bad parts and choppy writing. C+C is still appreciated though, so have fun reading.

[spoiler=Chapter One-Birth of a Hero].      The stories of heroes tell tales of warriors, men who serve a great king in his army if knights. They display young men who rise above their all others, but this story; this story is not of a man, but a creature born of the wild. 

Deep in the shadowy forests, in the land of Polarus, resided a small group of creatures, cold-blooded, bipedal reptiles. These were the last of their kind. Insects crawled on the branches of trees, birds twittered by. The reptillian creatures huddled near the edge of dark, quiet pond. Three eggs were nestled snuggly between the plants and rocks. The parents of the eggs were defending them and keeping them warm. As the pond creatures swam and the forest critters scuttled, a rumbling was heard. The sound crept closer, and the calm pond water began to ripple. Four starred ladybugs scattered, and foxfires nimbly dashed out of view, and the humanoid reptiles stood up in fear. Trees began falling down, and shouting was heard. Hundreds of men razed everything in sight, all in order to kill the almost extinct race of bipedal reptiles. The emperor had been hunting the creatures for years. They were mistaken as evil, but were really only scared. They stayed, confident and strong. Warriors stepped out of the shadows, armed to the teeth with swords, daggers, and crossbows. A man stepped forward to identify himself. "I am Commander Freed the brave, if you do not give yourself up to the king, your death will be slower and more painful than it has to be!" he shouted. The reptiles did not waver, but hissed and stood ready for battle. Freed took this as a challenge, and growled in anger. "So be it!" he said, "Field commander Rahz, prepare the troops for battle."

"Yes sir" replied Rahz, striding into the group. The lizards were the first to strike. Swift and strong, they dashed towards the front group. The three were huddled together in an impenetrable formation. The front line held stedy, their silver shields blocking every terrifying strike. The rest of the warriors attacked. Surging forward like a wave, each one was to taste the fury of the reptilians. The reptilians made a screetch comparable to that of a banshee. Some of the warriors were distracted and were taken down with ease, most others continued the fight. The screetch was not meant to be a battle tactic, but distraction, and a signal. Little did the army men notice, but the ground was being covered with four starred ladybugs. The reptilians backed off, knowing of the disaster about to ensue. The ladybugs swarmed all around, flying towards the warriors, buzzing loudly and ramming into them. They began hacking and slashing at the ladybugs in hopes to kill some. One foot-soldier stabbed a ladybug. The insect exploded in a burst of liquid goop. The substance covered the soldier. "Gyaaahhh!!!!" he screamed in pain, his flesh being wren away by the slime. All over, Freeds men were being reduced to peices by the four starred ladybugs. Freed used his enchanted shield to guard from the slime, but fell back saying "We need weapons from the supply cart!" A soldier ran towards him, panting "Our supplies were stolen by a goblin theif!" before being splattered on the face by a dying ladybug. In the field of battle Freeds men were being slaughtered by the exploding insects. One of his men was able to kill a reptilian creature before falling down dead. The reptilians body fell back, sword sticking out of it's chest with it's black blood gushing, and landed next to the nest. Before it drew it's final breath, the reptilian knocked aside one of the eggs, sending it floating away in the water. Reinforcements of the army arrived and the Emperors army was victorious.

Under the cover of the deep, dark water, the egg floated downstream away from the battle. The last of the reptilian creatures was excaping it's death as nothing but an egg. The water twisted and turned, finally flowing into a large lake. Sea creatures swam about, churning the waters which thrashed the small organic container about. A seven coloured fish knocked it aside as wave brought the egg onto the sandy shore where it finally rested.

Unlike the egg, a petit girl with blue hair lived in a peaceful area next to the shore. It was a small, simple town with very few people. So much so that everyone in the town was related. Everyone lived in small wooden houses which were usually only one floor. The girl who was but a child ran towards the shoreline after seeing what she thought was a small rock wash up. She stumbled across the soft sand, finally reaching the egg. She stared at it inquisitively with her shiny blue eyes. She reached towards it to touch a small crack that was on the surface. Just as she touched it the crack got bigger. The crack began to spread quickly, creating more cracks until finally it stopped. The side of the egg burst open revealing a small, clawed hand. A head poked out, and the small creature crawled out. It was a lizard-like creature, with red eyes and small teeth. It's jaw was large and it's tail was small, and it had dull claws and spikes on it's knees and shoulders. The girl was suprized at the reptile, and smiled with glee. "You're so cute!" She exclaimed picking it up, "I think I'll name you Gigobyte!"[/spoiler]
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Well I guess it's a good thing I finished chapter 2 over a camping trip.
[spoiler=Chapter 2]Chapter 2:
Birth of a Friendship

Three months after the incident in the forest, the girl with blue hair and the newborn reptilian became the closest of friends. "Hurry up Gigobyte!" exclaimed Eria, who had grown since their meeting at the beach. Her blue hair was now long and flowing, just reaching her waist. She wore a green shirt with a large brown belt underneath an oversized brown coat. She had a blue skirt and a small fuzzy blue charm clipped to her belt. "We're going to be late" she said.
"I'm right behind you!" Gigobyte replied. Gigobyte had grown quite significantly in the past few months. His spikes had gotten sharper, he was bigger, and Eria had fitted him with leather chaps and bracers. The pair were on their way to the graduation ceremony, where Eria would finally become an element charmer. Her element was water, and she already knew who she would choose as her familiar. They finally reached the red gates, which were large in size and adorned with many decorations. The two entered into a rather large and spacious hall that was filled with people who were proud of their graduating friends and relatives. Everyone in the room turned and stared. Eria was late yet again, as she always was. "Eria, luckily for you, we were about to call you. If you had come any later we would have had to cancel your graduation." said an older man standing on the stage. Nervously, Eria shuffled up the steps and up onto the wooden stage. "Eria has now attained the level of Water Charmer, and will be helping in the defending of the city." The crowd roared with cheering as Eria accepted her reward. The older man handed to her a short wooden staff. It was blue with white trimmings and a large butt end. On the other end was a curved hook which had three rings near the end. The staff was covered in blue leaves, and in the center of the curved hook was a blue crystal. Eria was glad that she was finally a full fledged water charmer. 

After the ceremonies ended, Eria and Gigobyte left for home. "Aren't you so excited" she giggled, "I'm becoming a water charmer". 
"Of course I'm excited! We finally get to fight baddies and monsters!" Gigobyte replied. Tomorrow Eria would have to choose a creature as her familiar, and she already knew that she would choose Gigobyte. The pair walked home together excited about the day ahead of them.

They entered Eria's home where her grandmother was living with her. Eria informed her grandmother, who responded with a smile, followed by the baking of cookies. When they had eaten their fill, the two fell asleep in their room.

Gigobyte awoke early the next morning.  He stood up and began jumping on Eria. "Gaah!" she screamed, and sat up startled. "Eria, it's your first day! You have to get up!" chattered Gigobyte. Eria smiled and jumped out of bed. She quickly put on her clothes, picked up Gigobyte, and ran out the door. Gigobyte was slightly annoyed at being carried, but was too excited to be mad. "Hey, I can run you know!" grumbled Gigobyte.
"Oh, sorry" replied Eria, letting go. Gigobyte jumped down and rolled across the dirt, then got up and ran with Eria. They finally arrived at their destination deep in the woods. In the small clearing, there were five other people with small creatures by their sides. Eria saw her friend, Lyna the Light Charmer, who wore black and white overalls under a papyrus coloured cloak that was two times too big for a small girl like her. Her white hair was cut short so that it would not cover her grey eyes. She wore black shoes with black stockings, and two leather sashes around her waist. Lyna ran up to Eria. "Isn't this just fantastic!" she squealed. The two conversed while Gigobyte began wandering around the clearing. He was curious about surounding area. He heard a noise. He looked to his left. Something was shifting within the bushes, and by now it had everyones attention. Gigobyte prepared for what creature might jump out to attack.

"Welcome children! It's me! Lourence! Just wanted to make sure you were on your toes!" he exclaimed happilly with a light Scottish accent, and a huge smile set upon his face. Gigobyte, along with the charmers, sighed a sigh of relief. "It's time for you to all choose your familiars! You will all enter the woods in search of a creature of your choice, one that you have a connection with. You'll know when you've found it." old man Lourence told them enthusiasticly. Each of the charmers set off into the dark forest, each in search of their familiars. All except Eria. Eria approached old man Lourence. "What if I already have a familiar?" she asked him, refering to Gigobyte. He looked down at Gigobyte and smiled. "Well then, you two will move on and enter the forest together." He moved aside and gestured for them to enter the dark part of the forest. The two nervously walked into the canopy of trees. Eria turned around and said "Wait, what are we looking-". Old man Lourence had already disappeared. "Well isn't that just fantastic" said Gigobyte.

The two walked through the forest for hours, not knowing where to go or what they were looking for. They were surrounded by bushes, trees with odd patterns canopied the forest, and strange noises were heard from all directions. "This is horrible! We have to trudge through the bad part of the forest without knowing why!" Gigobyte yelled. 
"You wanna just go back? I don't think he'll mind" said Eria. She didn't like the situation as much as he did. The two were about to turn around and leave when a rustling was heard within a thick group of trees. "Haha, very funny old man. We're not falling for that again, so just walk out instead of jumping out trying to scare us." Gibobyte said sarcastically. Suddenly, a person steps out. That person was not an old man, but a young woman. "Hey boys! I found another one!" she yelled into the forest. Gigobyte's eyes widened. He'd been told about these people before. [i]Dark Scorpions![/i] he thought as he stared at her tattoo. He heard a scream, and when he turned around, Eria was gone, and he was alone.[/spoiler]

Edit: A new card that features Gagagigo is being released, Eisbahn. I get to extend my story in a later part.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

[b]Weather Reports, Foe Fiction. These are what have shown us the writing capability of YCM. That is, very little at all. Do we need more proof of this? Yes, because these are Phantom's Divinations.[/b]

[color=#008080]Phantom Roxas has left his office. Perfect. Now, let's see... Ah yes, "Like No Ever Was". That should prove useful.[/color]


[color=#008080]So this is Gameville. To think PikMan actually changed this world's name to "Mediaville". I must give it credit for heeding Phantom Roxas's words.[/color]

[color=#FF8C00]Hey there![/color]

[color=#008080]Jacob. Right on schedule.[/color]

[color=#FF8C00]I don't think I've seen you before. What's your name? I'm-[/color]

[color=#008080]A pleasure, Jacob.[/color]

[color=#FF8C00]Huh? How do you know my name?[/color]

[color=#008080]I have my sources. I am called Votek, and I have come hear with a job for you.[/color]

[color=#FF8C00]Sure, what is it?[/color]

[color=#008080]Nothing too major. You see, I require the assistance of one with your... qualifications.[/color]

[color=#FF8C00]Not sure what that means, but okay. What's the mission?[/color]

[color=#008080]You will assist me in reading this.[/color]

[url="http://forum.yugiohcardmaker.net/topic/256082-the-tale-of-gagagigo/"][color=#FF8C00]"The Tale of Gagagigo"[/color][/url][color=#FF8C00]? Oh, man, I love that card![/color]

[color=#008080]Indeed, and you are not the only one. I trust that you are familiar with "Mystery Science Theater 3000"?[/color]

[color=#FF8C00]You bet! Oh, I get it, we're going to do that, but f[/color][color=#ff8c00]or this [/color][url="http://forum.yugiohcardmaker.net/user/19978-ed00001/"][color=#ff8c00]Ed00001[/color][/url][color=#ff8c00] guy's fanfi[/color][color=#FF8C00]c?[/color]

[color=#008080]Precisely.[/color]

[color=#FF8C00]Count me in! But can you make it fast? The World Laser Tag Grand Tournament prelims are in a couple hours, and I don't want to miss it. By the way, isn't that black cloak you're in a bit hot?[/color]

[color=#008080]Let us begin with "Chapter One-Birth of a Hero".[/color]

[color=#FF8C00]Wait, aren't you supposed to put a space before and after the hyphen there?[/color]

[i].[/i]

[color=#008080]This is but a period, but already there is a problem. As it follows the spoiler tag, the author clearly made the mistake and intended to have this be a part of the chapter title. It would appear that he is unaware that chapter titles do not use periods. This would also imply that he has never read a book.[/color]

[i]The stories of heroes tell tales of warriors, men who serve a great king in his army if knights.[/i]

[color=#FF8C00]Don't you mean "[i]of [/i]knights"?[/color]

[color=#008080]The author makes numerous grammatical errors. Picking apart every single one would only keep you here longer than necessary. For the sake of convenience, I'll underline the errors that are otherwise minor.[/color]

[i]They display young men who rise above their all others,[/i]

[color=#008080]"Display"? Last I heard, stories were a narrative medium, not a museum.[/color]

[i]but this story; this story is not of a man, but a creature born of the wild. [/i]

[color=#ff8c00]Was this prologue really all that necessary? You're just saying we're going to read about a wild animal, and everything you just told us is stuff we can figure out while we read this.[/color]

[i]Deep in the shadowy forests, in the land of Polarus, [/i][i]resided a small group of creatures, cold-blooded, bipedal reptiles. These were the last of their kind. Insects crawled on the branches of trees, birds twittered by. [/i]

[color=#008080]An impressive start to describing the scenery, although the "birds twittered by" part is awkward. Perhaps adding an "as" before it would be more acceptable, to prevent a run-on sentence.[/color]

[i]The reptillian creatures huddled near the edge of dark, quiet pond.[/i] [i]Three eggs were nestled snuggly between the plants and rocks. The parents of the eggs were defending them and keeping them warm. As the pond creatures swam and the forest critters scuttled, a rumbling was heard. The sound crept closer, and the calm pond water began to ripple. Four starred ladybugs scattered, and foxfires nimbly dashed out of view, and the humanoid reptiles stood up in fear. [/i]

[color=#ff8c00]Four[b]-[/b]starred ladybugs and [s]fox fires[/s] foxfires? These are some nice references to the actual cards! However, since this story is about Gagagigo, inevitably he's going to meet the smexy Eria, and her fellow Charmer Hiita has her own Fox Fire, so I'm curious if one of them will survive or if Hiita has already met her partner.[/color]

[color=#008080]..."Smexy"?[/color]

[i]Trees began falling down, and shouting was heard. Hundreds of men razed everything in sight, all in order to kill the almost extinct race of bipedal reptiles. The emperor had been hunting the creatures for years. They were mistaken as evil, but were really only scared.[/i]

[color=#008080]Naturally, we won't learn why this emperor mistook them for evil creatures.[/color]

[i]They stayed, confident and strong. Warriors stepped out of the shadows, armed to the teeth with swords, daggers, and crossbows. A man stepped forward to identify himself. "I am Commander Freed the brave, if you do not give yourself up to the king, your death will be slower and more painful than it has to be!" he shouted. The reptiles did not waver, but hissed and stood ready for battle. Freed took this as a challenge, and growled in anger. "So be it!" he said, "Field commander Rahz, prepare the troops for battle."[/i]

[color=#ff8c00]Freed? Rahz? I got to say, you're really good at throwing all these cards in here![/color]

[i]"Yes sir" replied Rahz, striding into the group. The lizards were the first to strike. Swift and strong, they dashed towards the front group. The three were huddled together in an impenetrable formation. The front line held [u]stedy[/u], their silver shields blocking every terrifying strike. The rest of the warriors attacked. Surging forward like a wave, each one was to taste the fury of the reptilians. [/i]

[color=#008080]Those last two sentences could have easily been edited to make one single sentence. Perhaps it would have made the warriors genocide attempt appear more glorious.[/color]

[i]The reptilians made a screetch comparable to that of a banshee. Some of the warriors were distracted and were taken down with ease, most others continued the fight.[/i]

[color=#ff8c00]"Most others continued the fight?" I dunno, something about that just seems off to me.[/color]

[i]The screetch was not meant to be a battle tactic, but distraction, and a signal.[/i]

[color=#ff8c00]The [b]screech[/b] ruse was [u]a[/u]... DISTACTION.[/color]

[i]Little did the army men notice, but the ground was being covered with four starred ladybugs. The reptilians backed off, knowing of the disaster about to ensue. The ladybugs swarmed all around, flying towards the warriors, buzzing loudly and ramming into them. [/i]

[color=#ff8c00]A solider attack, a deadly ladybug assault... Ladybugs. My god.[/color]

[i]They began hacking and slashing at the ladybugs in hopes to kill some. One foot-soldier stabbed a ladybug.[/i]

[color=#008080]The exact size of the four-starred ladybugs is unclear, but the Virtual World arc implies that it is human-sized, which would be the only reason it would make sense for a foot soldier to stab one.[/color]

[i]The insect exploded in a burst of liquid goop. The substance covered the soldier. "Gyaaahhh!!!!" he screamed in pain, his flesh being wren away by the slime. All over, Freed[u][b][color=#008080]'[/color][/b][/u]s men were being reduced to p[color=#008080]ie[/color]ces by the four starred ladybugs. Freed used his enchanted shield to guard from the slime, but fell back saying "We need weapons from the supply cart!" A soldier ran towards him, panting "Our supplies were stolen by a goblin th[color=#008080]ie[/color]f!" before being splattered on the face by a dying ladybug.[/i]

[color=#008080]Oh my. There is just so much wrong with this paragraph, especially that last sentence. This has quite a few grammatical errors, which I have taken the liberty of amending. It is the very least I could do. However, why would the soldiers only wait until now to inform their leader that their supplies were stolen? Is Goblin of Greed so stealthy that he just happened to steal them just now, or did no one wish to inform Freed that the weapons they would need for this mission had been stolen earlier, and he just never noticed this? Really, this is just a lazy way to write the soldiers into a corner.[/color]

[i]In the field of battle Freed[/i][i][u][b][color=#008080]'[/color][/b][/u][/i][i]s men were being slaughtered by the exploding insects. [/i]

[color=#ff8c00]Wait, a minute, 4-Starred Ladybug of Doom destroys all Level 4 monsters. Shouldn't Freed and Rahz be killed by this?[/color]

[color=#008080]Clearly Ed00001 is ignoring the effect and/or keeping them alive for the sake of plot convenience.[/color]

[i]One of his men was able to kill a reptilian creature before falling down dead. The reptilians body fell back, sword sticking out of it's chest with it's black blood gushing, and landed next to the nest. [/i]

[color=#008080]Allow me to read this sentence to address how you remarkably failed to use apostrophes properly. "The reptilians body fell back, sword sticking out of it is chest with it is black blood gushing, and landed next to the nest." "It's" is a contraction of "it is", while you were clearly supposed to write "its", which is possessive. Furthermore, by writing "reptilian's" without an apostrophe, that would refer to more than one reptile, and thus an apostrophe should have been included there instead of within "its".[/color]

[color=#ff8c00]Um, Grammar Nazi much?[/color]

[color=#008080]A necessity, I can assure you.[/color]

[i]Before it drew it's final breath, the reptilian knocked aside one of the eggs, sending it floating away in the water. Reinforcements of the army arrived and the Emperors army was victorious.[/i]

[color=#008080]How cute, another nod to a card. However, this only continues your problem with apostrophes.[/color]

[i]Under the cover of the deep, dark water, the egg floated downstream away from the battle. The last of the reptilian creatures was excaping it's death as nothing but an egg. [/i]

[color=#ff8c00]"Excaping"? Wow, that's just... um...[/color]

[color=#008080]Who is the Grammar Nazi now?[/color]

[i]The water twisted and turned, finally flowing into a large lake. Sea creatures swam about, churning the waters which thrashed the small organic container about. A seven coloured fish knocked it aside as wave brought the egg onto the sandy shore where it finally rested.[/i]

[color=#ff8c00]Well, that's kind of a weird way to end the chapter, but it's a nice ending nonetheless.[/color]

[color=#008080]If only that were true.[/color]

[color=#ff8c00]What?[/color]

[i]Unlike the egg, a petit girl with blue hair lived in a peaceful area next to the shore.[/i]

[color=#ff8c00]Eria![/color]

[color=#008080]This sequence is so unnecessary. Whoever thought that changing the scene to a random kid after an epic conflict has just transpired is a moron.[/color]

[i]It was a small, simple town with very few people. So much so that everyone in the town was related.[/i]

[color=#008080]"Everyone in the town was related"? Must I address the implications of that?[/color]

[color=#ff8c00]I need some soap to wash my brain.[/color]

[i]Everyone lived in small wooden houses which were usually only one floor. The girl who was but a child ran towards the shoreline after seeing what she thought was a small rock wash up.[/i]

[color=#008080]Really, a small rock washed on shore, and that is what prompted Eria to go to the shore? Of course, she may have been intrigued by the fact that it looks like an egg, because it is, but as she was a child, I cannot fathom her being able to see it from far away.[/color]

[i]She stumbled across the soft sand, finally reaching the egg. She stared at it inquisitively with her shiny blue eyes. She reached towards it to touch a small crack that was on the surface. Just as she touched it the crack got bigger. The crack began to spread quickly, creating more cracks until finally it stopped. The side of the egg burst open revealing a small, clawed hand. A head poked out, and the small creature crawled out. It was a lizard-like creature, with red eyes and small teeth. It's jaw was large and it's tail was small, and it had dull claws and spikes on it's knees and shoulders.[/i]

[color=#008080]It had just hatched, and the egg was small, and yet the reptile does not sound newborn. Then again, I couldn't care less about what animals look like once they are born.[/color]

[color=#ff8c00]Wait, is this supposed to be Gigobyte, or a form even smaller than that? I have to say, the latter is a bit hard to imagine.[/color]

[i]The girl was suprized at the reptile, and smiled with glee. "You're so cute!" She exclaimed picking it up, "I think I'll name you Gigobyte!"[/i]

[color=#008080]"Gigobyte"? The girl clearly spent no time thinking of the name, and yet that is what she comes up with? I won't even get started on her finding a newborn reptile adorable, because that is apparently to be expected in stories such as these.[/color]

[color=#ff8c00]Hey, don't be so harsh on her![/color]

[color=#008080]Your fetishes are not my concern, lest you wish me to address to love for robots with a female form.[/color]

[color=#ff8c00]Wait, what?[/color]

[color=#008080]In any case, this was a passable story. There were a few faults in logic over the course of this, and countless grammatical errors plagued it.[/color]

[color=#ff8c00]Still, he did a nice job of weaving a story with the cards, and that counts for something.[/color]

[color=#008080]I suppose. Those who are a fan of Gagagigo's story should give this a try, but those that expect a story that can stand on its own might be disappointed.[/color]

[color=#ff8c00]I know I'm going to read this again![/color]

[color=#008080]Jacob, thank you for your assistance.[/color]

[color=#FF8C00]Glad I could help, uh, Votek, wasn't it? Anyway, it was- oh shoot, I gotta hurry! Sorry, I have to go. I guess I'll see you later.[/color]

[color=#008080]Indeed you shall, Jacob.[/color]

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 2 weeks later...

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

×
×
  • Create New...