Dragonslayer445 Posted June 19, 2011 Report Share Posted June 19, 2011 [spoiler=Spoiler][img]http://img30.imageshack.us/img30/6446/434500.jpg[/img][left]1 tuner + 1 or more non tuners This card's attack is increased by 200x by how many effect type monsters are in both you and your opponent's graveyards.[/left] [img]http://img822.imageshack.us/img822/6446/434500.jpg[/img] [left]This card cannot be normal summoned or set unless you pay 1000 life points and remove from play 1 thunder type monster and 1 dark monster. If you tribute a monster with the words grim reaper in there name you may special summon this card from your hand. Once per game, you may remove this card from play to inflict half of this cards attack to your opponent's life points.[/left] [img]http://img713.imageshack.us/img713/6446/434500.jpg[/img] [img]http://img195.imageshack.us/img195/6446/434500.jpg[/img] [left]When this monster is sent to the graveyard special summon any level 4 or lower "Grim Reaper" monster from your deck.[/left] [img]http://img27.imageshack.us/img27/6446/434500.jpg[/img][img]http://img685.imageshack.us/img685/5185/434500k.jpg[/img] [left]This card cannot be destroyed by battle. If there is another "Grim Reaper" monster on the field this card may attack directly.[/left] [img]http://img862.imageshack.us/img862/3060/434500v.jpg[/img][img]http://img560.imageshack.us/img560/6446/434500.jpg[/img][left]Once per turn you may tribute a monster to destroy 1 card randomly from your opponents hand. This card is uneffected by trap cards.[/left] [img]http://img703.imageshack.us/img703/6446/434500.jpg[/img][left]Grim Reaper, Flying Falconeer + Grim Reaper, The Relentless Once per game you may remove this card from play to destroy all cards on your opponent's side of the field and remove them from play. Once per turn you may discard one "Grim Reaper" monster from your hand to randomly take and discard one card from your opponent's hand.[/left] [img]http://img844.imageshack.us/img844/5185/434500k.jpg[/img][/spoiler] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Not-so-Radiant Arin Posted June 19, 2011 Report Share Posted June 19, 2011 First post! Yes. Anyways, I have a lot of comments to make on your cards. [quote]1 tuner + 1 or more non tuners This cards attack is determined by how many effect type monsters are in both of your graveyards.[/quote] For your first card, you need to specify how much ATK and DEF it is increased by. Since everyone runs Effect Monsters anymore and no vanillas, it makes sense to make it a small number. For example, the effect might read: [quote] 1 tuner + 1 or more Non-Tuner Monsters Increase this card's ATK and DEF by 100 points for each Effect Monster in both you and your opponent's Graveyards.[/quote] Kept the same general Effect, just manipulated the wording a bit and fixed up the OCG. [quote]When this monster is sent to the graveyard special summon any lv4 or lower monster with the words Grim Reaper in there name from your deck.[/quote] Standard grammar rules still apply as well when you are talking about cards. Sometimes it's hard to mix Standard Grammar and Yu-Gi-Oh Grammar into a card effect, but it can be done. You just have to understand your cards better. Always spell out Level. I'll manipulate again: [quote] When this monster is sent to the graveyard, Special Summon any Level 4 or lower monster with "Grim Reaper" in it's name from your Deck. [/quote] I think I could get paid to fix OCG (obvious sarcasm). Sacrifice = Tribute. Just different wording. [quote]Grim Reaper, Flying Falconeer + Grim Reaper, The Relentless Once per game you may sacrifice this card to destroy all cards on your opponents side of the field and remove them from play. Once per turn you may randomly take and discard one card from your opponents hand.[/quote] 1. This card doesn't have a labeled ATK or DEF points. 2. The effect is WAAY to Overpowered (OP). It's basically a Banishing Black Rose Dragon, but you get to keep your own cards. The second effect is also OP, because you can't just take something out of your opponent's hand. "You have to give a little to get a lot" (Words of Mako Tsunami, the most annoying anime character in the Yugioh Universe). Either remove this effect from the card or give it a cost, like: [quote] Grim Reaper, Flying Falconeer + Grim Reaper, The Relentless You may Tribute this card to destroy all cards on your opponent's side of the field and Banish them. This effect can only be used once per Duel. Once per turn, by discarding one "Grim Reaper" monster in your Hand, you can randomly destroy one card in your opponent's Hand.[/quote] I'm just pointing you along in the right direction as to how to improve your OCG and card effects. I think Grim Reaper, the 3000 is silly. it looks like a Sith Lord from Star Wars more than it does the Grim Reaper. Breakdown: 7/10 - Concept and originality 5/10 - OCG 9/10 - Artwork (some great pictures) Total: 7/10 (Good) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dragonslayer445 Posted June 19, 2011 Author Report Share Posted June 19, 2011 thx for the help Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shadowuchiha08 Posted June 20, 2011 Report Share Posted June 20, 2011 I agree with the first commenting user. Its a great new aspect but they need a common effect. Since grim reapers are reapers of fate, they should deal with graveyard manupalation Make sure to review your cards before posting for common errors. In the traditional sense, bad grammar is understandable by using the word sacrifice but in the modern sense, we use common names such as tribute to better understand card wording. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phantom Roxas Posted June 20, 2011 Report Share Posted June 20, 2011 I put everything in a spoiler to reduce the size of your post. I also locked your other Grim Reaper topics, since this card is the complete set and I would rather not have useless duplicate topics. Learn to use the edit button. • Bringer of Destruction is a generic Synchro, but it's nothing more than a beatstick. • Commander of Lightning: "This card only be Normal Summoned or Set by paying 1000 Life Points and banishing 1 Thunder-Type and 1 Dark-Type monster. You can Special Summon this card from your hand by tributing 1 "Grim Reaper" monster you control. Once per game, you can inflict damage to your opponent equal to half of this card's ATK." First, you need to clarify where you banish the monsters from. Regardless, this card has horrible summoning requirements unless you run a Grim Reaper deck, but at least it's not a Nomi. Regardless, it's mostly just a beatstick, but the burn effect is nice. • The Executioner: "When this monster is sent to the Graveyard, Special Summon 1 Level 4 or lower "Grim Reaper" monster from your Deck." Alright, this card is good. • The fact that you need another Grim Reaper to have The Spirit attack directly is silly, but I guess it balances out it's immunity to battle. • Flying Falconeer: "Once per turn, you can Tribute 1 monster to destroy 1 random card in your opponent's hand. This card cannot be affected by trap cards." It's very easy to kill, so it's pretty much a gamble since chances are you'll only discard 1 card, which may or may not be worth the tribute, and then on your opponent's turn they can most likely kill it. • Head Mistress is more cheap than Judgment Dragon. At least with that card you lose your cards too and you just have Judgment Dragon to attack with unless you summon another card after the effect. With this, all you lose is Head Mistress. The OCG corrections may not be fully accurate, not to mention there's the new actual OCG. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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