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Nathanael D. Striker

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Nathanael D. Striker Apprentice

Nathanael D. Striker

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While you are here LC...

[spoiler=...Read this]


[color=#000000][font=Arial][size=3]Before YCM existed, there was a mysterious evil that ravaged throughout the world, and it was powerful indeed. It had the ability to send forces unimaginable to infiltrate and turn cities into a complete wasteland. Its goal was to destroy the world and rebuild it in its image. Before it could accomplish its goal, two brave warriors, code-named 'Wiseman' and 'Inventor', defeated this evil as it was headed towardsYCM. They sealed it away for what they thought was eternity, but the evil did take something from each of the warriors before it was sealed.It took the sanity of one and the arm of the other.[/size][/font][/color]

[color=#000000][font=Arial][size=3]Thanks to the evil, Wiseman convinced Inventor to steal the possessions of people and force them to play sadistic games. They targeted YCM, which was the very place they defended from the evil. When they found a YCM super computer called “Smesh”, the two put their plan into action. They placed a virus into the computer, which allowed them to attack people without remorse, destroying everything in their path. Before they could reap the fruit of their plans, the officials of YCM, with the help of Black, shut “Smesh” down before it was too late.[/size][/font][/color]

[color=#000000][font=Arial][size=3]Not willing to accept defeat, Wiseman and Inventor created a more powerful computer program called “Dark." More sadistic that “Smesh”, “Dark” forced more people to play the sadistic games. The duo got closer to accomplishing their plan, but "Dark" was foiled again by their own program. It somehow gained feelings when it confronted Clair and shut itself down after telling the duo to complete their plan themselves.[/size][/font][/color]

[color=#000000][font=Arial][size=3]The duo started the same way as they have always done. They hacked into peoples computers and forced them to play sadistic, yet virtual games. However, Wiseman became more insane as the years went on. He finally cracked and persuaded Inventor to raise the stakes; to make the games real. With Wiseman leading, the duo started trapping, even kidnapping their victims to play their sadistic games. The games also came with a threat of death for those who did not win or want to participate fully.[/size][/font][/color]

[color=#000000][font=Arial][size=3]Their plans were later caught by the Mods, yet they could not move in to shut down the games due to the risk of serious injury being inflicted on the victims. Wiseman kidnapped Mods to use as protection, which left them at a tough disadvantage. Wiseman’s genius forced them to move their efforts underground to keep Wiseman from finding out. However, Striker, a former victim, infiltrated Wiseman’s base as part of a gambling corporation. He was discovered and quickly disposed of before he could leak anything, or so Wiseman thought. Striker discovered part of Wiseman’s true plan of attack and leaked it to the Mods before faking his death and going into hiding.This information gave the Mods an idea of Wiseman‘s next move.[/size][/font][/color]

[color=#000000][font=Arial][size=3]As it turned out, Wiseman planned to take over the world through the internet. Inventor did not like the way Wiseman was doing things and feared that Wiseman became insane. His attack on Caeda and Clair made Inventor realize that Wiseman truly did go insane. However, it was some time after that he defected from Wiseman and started sending more information to the Mods about the exact location of Wiseman. This information, following the information Striker provided, allowed them to put together Wiseman’s end; or so they thought.[/size][/font][/color]

[color=#000000][font=Arial][size=3]Wiseman was not done yet. He brainwashed Black and Smeargle to distract the group while he dealt with Inventor, who changed his name to Nicholas. [/size][/font][/color][color=#000000][font=Arial][size=3]The battle between Nicholas and Wiseman was fierce. The two were evenly matched until Nicholas lost his footing. That gave Wiseman an opening to stab Nicholas in the chest. “Now no one can defe...” said Wiseman as a single sniper bullet went through Wiseman’ chest. Wiseman dropped his sword and fell onto the ground. Striker shot the bullet and quickly came down from his spot to attend to Nicholas. Nicholas was barely breathing: suffering fatal stab wounds. “Make something good out of this mess,” were his last words. [/size][/font][/color][color=#000000][font=Arial][size=3]Both Wiseman and Nicholas laid there motionless to be gathered by the dust; or so we all thought. A week later, Wiseman’s body disappeared with a note in its place. The note said, “The Darkness will finally overcome the Light.” Six months after the tragedy, a group of old friends are coming back to play. Are you ready for the Darkness?[/spoiler][/size][/font][/color]

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LC  Newbie

LC 

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Posted

[spoiler=...Read this]


[color=#000000][font=Arial][size=3]Before YCM existed, there was a mysterious evil that ravaged throughout the world, and it was powerful indeed. It had the ability to send forces unimaginable to infiltrate and turn cities into a complete wasteland. Its goal was to destroy the world and rebuild it in its image. Before it could accomplish its goal, two brave warriors, code-named 'Wiseman' and 'Inventor', defeated this evil as it was headed [/size][/font][/color][color=#008000][font=Arial][size=3]towards YCM[/size][/font][/color][color=#000000][font=Arial][size=3]. They sealed it away for what they thought was eternity, but the evil did take something from each of the warriors before it was[/size][/font][/color][color=#008000][font=Arial][size=3] sealed. It [/size][/font][/color][color=#000000][font=Arial][size=3]took the sanity of one and the arm of the other.[/size][/font][/color]

[color=#000000][font=Arial][size=3]Thanks to the evil, Wiseman convinced Inventor to steal the possessions of people and force them to play sadistic games. They targeted YCM, which was the very place they defended from the evil. When they found a YCM super computer called “Smesh”, the two put their plan into action. They placed a virus into the computer, which allowed them to attack people without remorse, destroying everything in their path. Before they could reap the fruit of their plans, the officials of YCM, with the help of Black, shut “Smesh” down before it was too late.[/size][/font][/color]

[color=#000000][font=Arial][size=3]Not willing to accept defeat, Wiseman and Inventor created a more powerful computer program called “Dark." More sadistic [/size][/font][/color][color=#008000][font=Arial][size=3]than[/size][/font][/color][color=#000000][font=Arial][size=3] “Smesh”, “Dark” forced more people to play the sadistic games. The duo got closer to accomplishing their plan, but "Dark" was [/size][/font][/color][color=#008000][font=Arial][size=3]foiled by[/size][/font][/color][color=#000000][font=Arial][size=3] their own program. It somehow gained feelings when it confronted Clair and shut itself down after telling the duo to complete their plan themselves.[/size][/font][/color]

[color=#000000][font=Arial][size=3]The duo started the same way as they have always done. They hacked into [/size][/font][/color][color=#008000][font=Arial][size=3]peoples'[/size][/font][/color][color=#000000][font=Arial][size=3] computers and forced them to play sadistic, yet virtual games. However, Wiseman became more insane as the years went on. He finally cracked and persuaded Inventor to raise the stakes; to make the games real. With Wiseman leading, the duo started trapping, even kidnapping their victims to play their sadistic games. The games also came with a threat of death for those who did not win or want to participate fully.[/size][/font][/color]

[color=#000000][font=Arial][size=3]Their plans were later caught by the Mods, yet they could not move in to shut down the games due to the risk of serious injury being inflicted on the victims. Wiseman kidnapped Mods to use as protection, which left them at a tough disadvantage. Wiseman’s genius forced them to move their efforts underground to keep [/size][/font][/color][color=#008000][font=Arial][size=3]him[/size][/font][/color][color=#000000][font=Arial][size=3] from finding out. However, Striker, a former victim, infiltrated Wiseman’s base as part of a gambling corporation. He was discovered and quickly disposed of before he could leak anything, or so Wiseman thought. Striker discovered part of Wiseman’s true plan of attack and leaked it to the Mods before faking his death and going into [/size][/font][/color][color=#008000][font=Arial][size=3]hiding. This[/size][/font][/color][color=#000000][font=Arial][size=3] information gave the Mods an idea of Wiseman‘s next move.[/size][/font][/color]

[color=#000000][font=Arial][size=3]As it turned out, Wiseman planned to take over the world through the internet. Inventor did not like the way Wiseman was doing things and feared that Wiseman became insane. His attack on Caeda and Clair made Inventor realize that Wiseman truly did go insane. However, it was some time after that he defected from Wiseman and started sending more information to the Mods about the exact location of Wiseman. This information, following the information Striker provided, allowed them to put together Wiseman’s end; or so they thought.[/size][/font][/color]

[color=#000000][font=Arial][size=3]Wiseman was not done yet. He brainwashed Black and Smeargle to distract the group while he dealt with Inventor, who changed his name to Nicholas. [/size][/font][/color][color=#000000][font=Arial][size=3]The battle between Nicholas and Wiseman was fierce. The two were evenly matched until Nicholas lost his footing. That gave Wiseman an opening to stab Nicholas in the chest. “Now no one can defe...” said Wiseman as a single sniper bullet went through [/size][/font][/color][color=#008000][font=Arial][size=3]Wiseman’s [/size][/font][/color][color=#000000][font=Arial][size=3]chest. Wiseman dropped his sword and fell onto the ground. Striker shot the bullet and quickly came down from his spot to attend to Nicholas. Nicholas was barely breathing: suffering fatal stab wounds. “Make something good out of this mess,” were his last words. [/size][/font][/color][color=#000000][font=Arial][size=3]Both Wiseman and Nicholas laid there motionless to be gathered by the dust; or so we all thought. A week later, Wiseman’s body disappeared with a note in its place. The note said, “The Darkness will finally overcome the Light.” Six months after the tragedy, a group of old friends are coming back to play. Are you ready for the Darkness?[/spoiler][/size][/font][/color]

[font="Arial"][color="#000000"][font=tahoma,geneva,sans-serif]Main things I thought needed to be fixed are in green. There might still be a few in there I missed though.[/font][/color][/font]

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☖☠☗JAXCOB☗☠☖ Newbie

☖☠☗JAXCOB☗☠☖

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I GOT ONE.
[Spoiler= 8D]
Before YCM existed, there was a mysterious evil that ravaged throughout the world, and it was powerful indeed. It had the ability to send forces unimaginable to infiltrate and turn cities into a complete wasteland. Its goal was to destroy the world and rebuild it in its image. Before it could accomplish its goal, two brave warriors, code-named 'Wiseman' and 'Inventor', defeated this evil as it was headed towards YCM. They sealed it away for what they thought was eternity, but the evil did take something from each of the warriors before it was sealed. It took the sanity of one and the arm of the other.

Thanks to the evil, Wiseman convinced Inventor to steal the possessions of people and force them to play sadistic games. They targeted YCM, which was the very place they defended from the evil. When they found a YCM super computer called “Smesh”, the two put their plan into action. They placed a virus into the computer, which allowed them to attack people without remorse, destroying everything in their path. Before they could reap the fruit of their plans, the officials of YCM, with the help of Black, shut “Smesh” down before it was too late.

Not willing to accept defeat, Wiseman and Inventor created a more powerful computer program called “Dark." More sadistic than “Smesh”, “Dark” forced more people to play the sadistic games. The duo got closer to accomplishing their plan, but "Dark" was foiled by their own program. It somehow gained feelings when it confronted Clair and shut itself down after telling the duo to complete their plan themselves.

The duo started the same way as they have always done. They hacked into peoples' computers and forced them to play sadistic, yet virtual games. However, Wiseman became more insane as the years went on. He finally cracked and persuaded Inventor to raise the stakes; to make the games real. With Wiseman leading, the duo started trapping, even kidnapping their victims to play their sadistic games. The games also came with a threat of death for those who did not win or want to participate fully.

Their plans were later caught by the Mods, yet they could not move in to shut down the games due to the risk of serious injury being inflicted on the victims. Wiseman kidnapped Mods to use as protection, which left them at a tough disadvantage. Wiseman’s genius forced them to move their efforts underground to keep him from finding out. However, Striker, a former victim, infiltrated Wiseman’s base as part of a gambling corporation. He was discovered and quickly disposed of before he could leak anything, or so Wiseman thought. Striker discovered part of Wiseman’s true plan of attack and leaked it to the Mods before faking his death and going into hiding. This information gave the Mods an idea of Wiseman‘s next move.

As it turned out, Wiseman planned to take over the world through the internet. Inventor did not like the way Wiseman was doing things and feared that Wiseman became insane. His attack on Caeda and Clair made Inventor realize that Wiseman truly did go insane. However, it was some time after that he defected from Wiseman and started sending more information to the Mods about the exact location of Wiseman. This information, following the information Striker provided, allowed them to put together Wiseman’s end; or so they thought.

Wiseman was not done yet. He brainwashed Black and Smeargle to distract the group while he dealt with Inventor, who changed his name to Nicholas. The battle between Nicholas and Wiseman was fierce. The two were evenly matched until Nicholas lost his footing. That gave Wiseman an opening to stab Nicholas in the chest. “Now no one can defe-...” said Wiseman as a single sniper bullet went through Wiseman’s chest. Wiseman dropped his sword and fell onto the ground. Striker shot the bullet and quickly came down from his spot to attend to Nicholas. Nicholas was barely breathing: suffering fatal stab wounds. “Make something good out of this mess,” were his last words. Both Wiseman and Nicholas laid there motionless to be gathered by the dust; or so we all thought. A week later, Wiseman’s body disappeared with a note in its place. The note said, “The Darkness will finally overcome the Light.” Six months after the tragedy, a group of old friends are coming back to play. Are you ready for the Darkness? [/spoiler]

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Nathanael D. Striker Apprentice

Nathanael D. Striker

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[color=#000000][font=Arial][size=3][spoiler=2nd Draft]Before YCM existed, there was a mysterious evil that ravaged throughout the world, and it was powerful indeed. It had the ability to send forces unimaginable to infiltrate and turn cities into a complete wasteland. Its goal was to destroy the world and rebuild it in its image. Before it could accomplish its goal, two brave warriors, code-named 'Wiseman' and 'Inventor', defeated this evil as it was headed towards YCM. They sealed it away for what they thought was eternity, but the evil did take something from each of the warriors before it was sealed. It took the sanity of one and the arm of the other.[/size][/font][/color]

[color=#000000][font=Arial][size=3]Thanks to the evil, Wiseman convinced Inventor to steal the possessions of people and force them to play sadistic games. They targeted YCM, which was the very place they defended from the evil. When they found a YCM super computer called “Smesh”, the two put their plan into action. They placed a virus into the computer, which allowed them to attack people without remorse, destroying everything in their path. Before they could reap the fruit of their plans, the officials of YCM, with the help of Black, shut “Smesh” down before it was too late.[/size][/font][/color]

[color=#000000][font=Arial][size=3]Not willing to accept defeat, Wiseman and Inventor created a more powerful computer program called “Dark." More sadistic that “Smesh”, “Dark” forced more people to play the sadistic games. The duo got closer to accomplishing their plan, but "Dark" was foiled by their own program. It somehow gained feelings when it confronted Clair and shut itself down after telling the duo to complete their plan themselves.[/size][/font][/color]

[color=#000000][font=Arial][size=3]The duo started the same way as they have always done. They hacked into peoples’ computers and forced them to play sadistic, yet virtual games. However, Wiseman became more insane as the years went on. He finally cracked and persuaded Inventor to raise the stakes; to make the games real. With Wiseman leading, the duo started trapping, even kidnapping their victims to play their sadistic games. The games also came with a threat of death for those who did not win or want to participate fully.[/size][/font][/color]

[color=#000000][font=Arial][size=3]Their plans were later caught by the Mods, yet they could not move in to shut down the games due to the risk of serious injury being inflicted on the victims. Wiseman kidnapped Mods to use as protection, which left them at a tough disadvantage. Wiseman’s genius forced them to move their efforts underground to keep him from finding out. However, Striker, a former victim, infiltrated Wiseman’s base as part of a gambling corporation. He was discovered and quickly disposed of before he could leak anything, or so Wiseman thought. Striker discovered part of Wiseman’s true plan of attack and leaked it to the Mods before faking his death and going into hiding. This information gave the Mods an idea of Wiseman‘s next move.[/size][/font][/color]

[color=#000000][font=Arial][size=3]As it turned out, Wiseman planned to take over the world through the internet. Inventor did not like the way Wiseman was doing things and feared that Wiseman became insane. His attack on Caeda and Clair made Inventor realize that Wiseman truly did go insane. However, it was some time after that he defected from Wiseman and started sending more information to the Mods about the exact location of Wiseman. This information, following the information Striker provided, allowed them to put together Wiseman’s end; or so they thought.[/size][/font][/color]

[color=#000000][font=Arial][size=3]Wiseman was not done yet. He brainwashed Black and Smeargle to distract the group while he dealt with Inventor, who changed his name to Nicholas. [/size][/font][/color][color=#000000][font=Arial][size=3]The battle between Nicholas and Wiseman was fierce. The two were evenly matched until Nicholas lost his footing. That gave Wiseman an opening to stab Nicholas in the chest. “Now no one can defe...” said Wiseman as a single sniper bullet went through Wiseman’s chest. Wiseman dropped his sword and fell onto the ground. Striker shot the bullet and quickly came down from his spot to attend to Nicholas. Nicholas was barely breathing: suffering fatal stab wounds. “Make something good out of this mess,” were his last words. [/size][/font][/color][color=#000000][font=Arial][size=3]Both Wiseman and Nicholas laid there motionless to be gathered by the dust; or so we all thought. A week later, Wiseman’s body disappeared with a note in its place. The note said, “The Darkness will finally overcome the Light.” [/size][/font][/color]

[color=#000000][font=Arial][size=3]The note did not discourage Striker. He quickly planned out the event. Naming it a Treehouse sponsored event, he enlisted his crew. Yet, disaster quickly struck the group. A spirit of Darkness engulfed one of Striker’s trusted advisers and turned on him. This forced Striker to postpone planning until the situation was dealt with. Things did shape up, but it caused Striker to resign as head to take on the role of Enforcement. Things went ahead, but trouble struck again as Striker took an unexpected hiatus. He returned to find little done. His butt worked as fast as the wind to make sure things were done. On the last night before the event, another note appeared on his desk. It said, “a group of old friends are coming back to play. Are you ready for the Darkness?”[/size][/font][/color][color=#000000][font=Arial][size=3] For Striker, things became more complicated.[/size][/font][/color]
[color=#000000][font=Arial][size=3][spoiler=Introduction] [/size][/font][/color]

[color=#000000][font=Arial][size=3]“May I have everyone’s attention please?!” yelled Striker. “Hello everyone and welcome to the 4th YCM Member Brawl!” He took a deep breath as the stress was creeping up to him.[/size][/font][/color]

[color=#000000][font=Arial][size=3]“Despite the troubles that have come up within the past few months, we are running the event as planned. 64 brave competitors will fight for a chance to become the best. The winner shall face receive the ultimate glory that has been granted to only a few.” He took another breath to calm his nerves, but it didn’t help much.[/size][/font][/color]

[color=#000000][font=Arial][size=3]“Many will triumph in this event while others will fall. It is your support that will keep these people going. Now, I have one thing to say; are you ready?" The stress caught up to him as he fell on the stage. He slowly got back up and walked off the stage.[/size][/font][/color][color=#000000][font=Arial][size=3][/spoiler][/spoiler][/size][/font][/color]

[color=#000000][font=Arial][size=3]Yeah, I did add some things.[/size][/font][/color]

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Nathanael D. Striker Apprentice

Nathanael D. Striker

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[quote name='Anger Level' timestamp='1320459856' post='5618138']
The second draft looks good, only my computer threw this error at it:

[code]

ERROR:

mapping values are not allowed here
in "<unicode string>", line 13, column 578:
... s. Nicholas was barely breathing: suffering fatal stab wounds. “ ...
^
[/code]

I then realized I wasn't using Word.
[/quote]

Heh. Odd. I'm using Google Docs.

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LC  Newbie

LC 

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Posted

[quote name='Daemon' timestamp='1320459281' post='5618110']
Did you see my logo? And I finally catching up to you?
[/quote]

Yes. It is not my place to judge others work to mine. If I had to I'd say mine is trash, so I wouldn't be the best in this situation.

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LC 

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[quote name='Daemon' timestamp='1320460605' post='5618175']
But you are my broski. Together, we are the bestest people alive with graphix/
[/quote]
I don't know what to say besides we still have a long way to go. We'll make it there together but I have to say one thing about logos, I hate black borders on them. D: Sometimes I like it depending on the color scheme and technique used. Different things go with different aspects of it.

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Simping For Hina Collaborator

Simping For Hina

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Posted

[quote name='Inferno Knight LC' timestamp='1320461105' post='5618210']
I don't know what to say besides we still have a long way to go. We'll make it there together but I have to say one thing about logos, I hate black borders on them. D: Sometimes I like it depending on the color scheme and technique used. Different things go with different aspects of it.
[/quote]Yo bro. I know what you mean. Just a tip on your tags, don't spam so many fractals for lighting. Try some brush and make it look more realistic. Your C4D abuse is kind of a turn off. The quality of this one (in your sig) isn't too hot, unlike you. <3

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LC  Newbie

LC 

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Posted

[quote name='Daemon' timestamp='1320503409' post='5618750']
Yo bro. I know what you mean. Just a tip on your tags, don't spam so many fractals for lighting. Try some brush and make it look more realistic. Your C4D abuse is kind of a turn off. The quality of this one (in your sig) isn't too hot, unlike you. <3
[/quote]

I know. The stock wasn't too good to begin with. I'm gonna switch it out once I find something else to fill it up with.

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