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YCMaker Ultra Hotel


Jake the Sage

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I wake up, blinded it seems. Everything is dark and i am unaware of my current state. "what am i..." i quietly whisper to my self. "you are of a special kind" i hear a voice speak from afar. "who are you? what about me is special? I am just an ordinary druid." I am still unable to see anything more than two feet away from me. "You are no longer this druid you speak of. You are stuck in your current form." i chuckle knowing that this fact is impossible. "that cant be true, at any moment i can become anything i want to be." I try to stand up and realize that i have only 2 legs. The last thing i remember was being a Unicorn and running from... "That is not true, when you fell and hit your head i gave you a potion. As it turns out a Magical Bear is worth more than a Unicorn." I stumble to the ground, this potion paralyzed me. I feel his cold dark hand grab the scruff of my neck. I turn to bite him, only to feel the even colder barrel of a gun touch my head. "hunter, you forgot one thing" The hunter looks to see a rock, far off in the cave we have ran into, lift. Feeling returns to my paws and as the hunter dodges the rock i scratch him on the face. It is still hard to see but its getting easier. "i still have my magic." the hunter moans as he stumbles against a wall on the far side of the cave. I feel the blood on my paw, this give me a reinsurance that i can once again be a free man. I charge at the hunter, only to hear the bang of a gun, only to feel a bullet penetrate my heart and stop my blood flow. "your worth more alive, but ill make due" Everything turns black as i become no more.

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Yeah writting comes naturally to me.

 

And Dwight . . . that sounds all and well, but you are breaking one of my personal pet peeves- Speech Position.

Place it at the beginning and/or ending of each paragraph.

 

Redo it to fit that and I'll read the rest, okay?

 

ok will do

 

I wake up, blinded it seems. Everything is dark and i am unaware of my current state.

"what am i..." i quietly whisper to my self.

"you are of a special kind" i hear a voice speak from afar.

"who are you? what about me is special? I am just an ordinary druid." I am still unable to see anything more than two feet away from me.

"You are no longer this druid you speak of. You are stuck in your current form." i chuckle knowing that this fact is impossible.

"that cant be true, at any moment i can become anything i want to be." I try to stand up and realize that i have only 2 legs. The last thing i remember was being a Unicorn and running from...

"That is not true, when you fell and hit your head i gave you a potion. As it turns out a Magical Bear is worth more than a Unicorn." I stumble to the ground, this potion paralyzed me. I feel his cold dark hand grab the scruff of my neck. I turn to bite him, only to feel the even colder barrel of a gun touch my head.

"hunter, you forgot one thing" The hunter looks to see a rock, far off in the cave we have ran into, lift. Feeling returns to my paws and as the hunter dodges the rock i scratch him on the face. It is still hard to see but its getting easier. "...i still have my magic." the hunter moans as he stumbles against a wall on the far side of the cave. I feel the blood on my paw, this give me a reinsurance that i can once again be a free man. I charge at the hunter, only to hear the bang of a gun, only to feel a bullet penetrate my heart and stop my blood flow.

"your worth more alive, but ill make due" Everything turns black as i become no more.

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That is a very important rule because it does a couple things:

 

1.) it helps your work look more professional

2.) it makes it easier for others to read your writting

 

EDIT:

 

It needs a bit more work, but so far it seems to be standard working and top pier standard to be exact.

But it is satisfactory in my eyes

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Yeah writting comes naturally to me.

 

And Dwight . . . that sounds all and well, but you are breaking one of my personal pet peeves- Speech Position.

Place it at the beginning and/or ending of each paragraph.

 

Redo it to fit that and I'll read the rest, okay?

 

I'm terrible at writing, and I still got a B+.

 

I got an A+ in calligraphy. :3

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That is a very important rule because it does a couple things:

 

1.) it helps your work look more professional

2.) it makes it easier for others to read your writting

 

EDIT:

 

It needs a bit more work, but so far it seems to be standard working and top pier standard to be exact.

But it is satisfactory in my eyes

 

so am i accepted? or do i have to make edits?

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Accepted to what? I thought you were just showing me how good you could write 8 /

 

But if you wanted to join a roleplay I have a couple that you could join, just let me get the OOC links

 

u said u had a few roleplays i could join but i decided to show u how good i can write to see if i was worthy haha

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