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Nexev

By Nexev
in Games

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Nexev Newbie

Nexev

Posted
Posted

It's not in fanfic since I don't think it's good enough for that.

You can choose some decision for it.

[spoiler=Chapter 1]
Look at this planet, so blue and well, greenish maybe? With white clouds? Just what the could this place be? You may never know!

[font="Arial Black"][font="Arial Black"]Enter Name =>[/font][/font]

Earth? Really? That's it? What a lame name.

Fine....

[font="Arial Black"]=>[/font]

A young robot stands in his bedroom. Except he is not a robot, he is a human. But for some reason, everyone thinks he is one. Anyway today is not his birthday or his wriggling day or whatever silly idea you came up with. It is however a thursday.

Yay.

Anyway, what's this not-robots name.
[font="Arial Black"][font="Arial Black"]
Enter name =>[/font][/font]

.... Yeah, I'm going to forbid you from entering names in for the rest of eternity.

I'll just do it myself.

[font="Arial Black"]Stop being such a smartass and get on with it =>[/font]

Wow, your a douche.

Your name is MAC STEELWELD. Your one of the most picked on kids in school because your school is PLAUGED BY THE HUMAN DISEASE KNOWN AS AS[i][/i]SHOLES. You got used to it though. Mainly you ignore them by focusing on your variety of interests instead. You are a big fan of EXTREMLY AWESOME ROBOTS as well as VARIOUS VIDEO GAMES. In addition you like to PRETEND YOU HAVE POWERS via ONLINE ROLEPLAYS. Most of all you like CONVERSING WITH YOUR ONLINE FRIENDS. Unfortunatly they tend to ALSO ABUSE YOU TO NO END. Your chumhandle is [color="#8B0000"]atomykEmpire[/color] and you [color="#FF0000"][color="#FF0000"]speaK iN a ratheR nervouS manneR[/color][/color]


[font="Arial Black"][font="Arial Black"]Equip Strife Specibus=>[/font][/font]
You go look at your lance, your Build- no Dad, DAMN HIM AND HIS OBSESSIONS, anyway whatever he is, he built this for you. It's pretty sweet but it's too big to carry to school so your still builed, still wouldn't hurt to try you guess.


[font="Arial Black"]=>
[/font]
Wait, you mean it disappears into your Strife Specibus! You coulda been carrying it this WHOLE TIME?

[font="Arial Black"]=>[/font]

GOD DAMN IT! You feel like such an idiot right now.

Maybe because you are.

Oh look, someone is pestering you, joy.

Let's just get this over with.

[font="Arial Black"]Greet fellow chum =>[/font]
[spoiler=open pesterlog]
[center][center][color="#9932CC"][color="#9932CC"]demonicallyVacuous [DV][/color][/color] began pestering [color="#FF0000"][color="#8B0000"]atomyckEmpire [AE][/color][/color] at whenever[/center][/center]
[color="#9932CC"][color="#9932CC"][DV] well well l00k wh0 sh0ws up <_<[/color][/color]
[color="#8B0000"][color="#8B0000"][AE] oH goD
[AE] whY yoU?
[AE] whY mE?
[AE] whY noW?[/color][/color]
[color="#9932CC"][color="#9932CC"][DV] wh0a calm d0wn
[DV] n0t here f0r a fight
[DV] n0t yet anyway <_<
[DV] just b0red and wanted to see wh0 was 0n
[DV] and its just y0u, and
[DV] ugh that stupid LB tr0ll <_<
[DV] whats that guys deal anway[/color][/color]
[color="#8B0000"][color="#8B0000"][AE] hE iS noT thaT baD
[AE] hE jusT doesn'T likE yoU
[AE] alloT oF peoplE don'T iF yoU thinK abouT iT[/color][/color]
[color="#9932CC"][color="#9932CC"][DV] geeze thanks i really felt like getting tr0lled t0day
[DV] thanks f0r the put me d0wn /=[/color][/color]
[color="#8B0000"][AE] sorrY
[AE] jusT haD a rougH daY[/color]
[color="#9932CC"][DV] 0h right y0u have t0 deal with th0se creeps
[DV] shame we are s0 far away
[DV] id l0ve to slice them up f0r y0u ;)[/color]
[color="#8B0000"][AE] thankS buT i thinK masS murdeR iS noT thE waY tO gO righT noW[/color]
[color="#9932CC"][color="#9932CC"][DV] d0nt menti0n it
[DV] were friends we stick 0ut f0r each 0ther
[DV] and if pe0ple keep beating 0n y0u
[DV] there w0nt be any left f0r me :)
[DV] 0h g0t that sBurb game yet
[DV] what a l0ser name for a game
[DV] but FB thinks it w0uld be g00d
[DV] plus it lets us talk to each0ther
[DV] s0 ill give it a chance[/color][/color]
[color="#8B0000"][AE] itS supposeD tO bE iN thE maiL
[AE] ilL havE tO asK mY buildeR abouT iT[/color]
[color="#9932CC"][DV] i th0ught y0u dr0pped the r0b0t crap <_<[/color]
[color="#8B0000"][AE] forcE oF habiT[/color]
[color="#9932CC"][DV] whatever
[DV] g0tta g0[/color]
[center][color="#9932CC"][DV][/color] has stopped pestering [color="#8B0000"][AE][/color][/center][/spoiler]

You gotta admit, that went rather well considering the fights that usually happen whenever you go on a memo.

Small favors you guess.

[font="Arial Black"]Enough chitchat, get game from Builder=>[/font]
Do you have to? He tends to go anywhere from scathingly sarcastic to just plain rude.

Your not in the mood for him trying to give you another 'training sim' anyway.

[font="Arial Black"]Just go!! =>[/font]

Wow, usually you'd just ignore this crap, but that second exclamation point changes everything.

Your going, happy?


[font="Arial Black"]Enough of this lazying about! =>[/font]
Okay fine. Geeze. You head downstairs, albeit reluctantly.

[font="Arial Black"][font="Arial Black"]=>[/font][/font]
Wow, look at all these ANIME POSTERS taped to like every single surface, way to help me get negative friends Builder.

I mean dad, DAMNIT!

Screw it, he's Builder from now on.

[font="Arial Black"]=>[/font]

OUCH!

Great, why does he always leave his RANDOM HANDCRAFTED TRINKETS everywhere? It's like he WANTS you to trip on them.

What was it anyway?

A drill? Why the hell would he build that?

[font="Arial Black"][font="Arial Black"]Proceed to Builder's lair =>[/font][/font]
If by lair you mean the basement then okay.

Here you go, about to interupt Builder in the middle of his work.

Man is he going to be pissed.

[font="Arial Black"][s]Enough talk STRIFE! =>[/font]
[url="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nYx8MAfjMyM"]Click me[/url]

Man that was hectic. What kinda a****** attaches fireworks to the end of their spear?

God Builder is such a cheat. Luckily you were able to snag the game after the firework knocked over a shelf filled with Builder's creations.

But man, you'll be nursing bruises all day.

[font="Arial Black"]Okay, head upstairs.=>[/font]

Well, that was needlessly dramatic, okay, with that fight over you can have a nice relaxing time enjoying this ga-

and someone else is pestering you.

Oh goody.[/spoiler]

[spoiler=Chapter 2]
[font="Arial Black"]Contact fellow human[/font]

[spoiler=open pesterlog]
[center][center][color="#008080"]xanatosForte [XF][/color] began trolling [color="#8B0000"][color="#8B0000"]atomyckEmpire [AE][/color][/color] at whenever[/center][/center]

[color="#008080"][XF] He11o mac.
[XF] Long time, no 2ee.
[XF] Did you at1ea2t get the game?[/color]
[color="#8B0000"][color="#8B0000"][AE] yeaH buildeR haD iT
[AE] hE kickeD mY asS[/color][/color]
[color="#008080"][XF] That'2 a11 there i2 to 2ay on the matter.[/color]
[color="#8B0000"][AE] thatS alL therE iS tO saY oN thE matteR
[AE] heY stoP sayinG thingS secondS beforE mE![/color]
[color="#008080"][color="#008080"][XF] Don't 6e 2uch a 6a6y.
[XF] If you weren't near1y so predicta61e a2 you are,
[XF] It wou1nt 6e 2o ea2y.[/color][/color]
[color="#8B0000"][AE] looK noT gettinG intO thiS[/color]
[color="#008080"][XF]What do you want?[/color]
[color="#8B0000"][AE]prettY mucH yeaH
[AE] XD[/color]
[color="#008080"][XF] You predicted that I'd 2ay your que2tion for you and purpo2edly ommited it?
[XF] We11 played.
[XF] Anyway I need a c1ient p1ayer for thi2 game to 2tart.
[XF] 2o you need to 6egin playing really 2oon.[/color]
[color="#8B0000"][color="#8B0000"][AE] finE buT whY?[/color][/color]
[color="#008080"][XF] Do you want to 6e DV'2 partner?[/color]
[color="#8B0000"][AE] okaY startinG to downloaD thiS gamE
[AE] letS gO![/color]
[color="#008080"]A11 too ea2y.[/color]
[center][color="#008080"][color="#008080"][XF][/color][/color] stopped pestering [color="#8B0000"][AE][/color][/center][/spoiler]

[font="Arial Black"]Mac: Play the Game=>[/font]

Yes, time for the greatest game ever.

You're doing this bro.

Your making it happen.

[font="Arial Black"]=>[/font]

Man this some intsense game of solitare your playing.

Oh, sBurb should have finished downloading by now.

Time to get to work.

[font="Arial Black"]=>[/font]
[spoiler=Open Pesterlog][center]
[color="#8B0000"][AE][/color] contancted [color="#008080"][XF][/color] at whenever.[/center]
[color="#8B0000"][AE] umM thE gamE iS donE
[AE] iT jusT sayS "suckeR"
[AE] whaT diD yoU dO[/color]
[color="#008080"][color="#008080"][XF] 1o1z
[XF] R2 2aid that wou1d happen.
[XF] 6ut don't worry
[XF] It'2 working on this end.
[XF] The whatever thing2 are already deployed.[/color][/color]
[color="#8B0000"][color="#8B0000"][AE] waiT
[AE] whaT[/color][/color]
[color="#008080"][XF] Check outside.[/color][/spoiler]
[font="Arial Black"]=>[/font]
[spoiler=pesterlog]
[color="#8B0000"][color="#8B0000"][color="#8B0000"]whaT iS witH alL thiS craP[/color][/color][/color]
[color="#008080"][XF] R2 2aid you need thi2 2tuff to enter the medium.[/color]
[color="#8B0000"][color="#8B0000"][AE] what'S thaT?[/color][/color]
[color="#008080"][color="#008080"][XF] Pro66a1y 2omething that need2 to 6e 2aved.
[XF] This I2 a game.[/color][/color]
[color="#8B0000"][color="#8B0000"][AE] righT sO whaT noW?[/color][/color]
[color="#008080"][color="#008080"][XF] Open the cy1inder thing.[/color][/color][/spoiler]
[font="Arial Black"]Umm what he said=>[/font]
[spoiler=pesterlog]
[color="#8B0000"][AE] geE thankS
[AE] I alwayS wanteD tO havE navI folloW mE
[AE] alL I neeD iS somE greeN tightS anD I caN gO kilL a blacK guY[/color]
[color="#008080"][XF] XD
[XF] Don't worry. You can prototype the thing.[/color]
[color="#8B0000"][AE] I caN dO whaT?[/color]
[color="#008080"][XF] Thi2 wa2 a11 in the ru1e 6ook.[/color]
[color="#8B0000"][color="#8B0000"][AE] theY stilL havE thosE?[/color][/color][/spoiler]
[font="Arial Black"]

Mac: Attempt to Prototype KernelSprite with Gurren Lagann figurine..

Then fail miserably and prototype it with Statue of The Engineer from TF2. =>[/font]
You consider doing that but you don't know the names of any of those silly animes Builder is always quoting. You tried once but then he tried to build you into a gundam.
You kinda freaked the f*** out from that one.

So you through a pair of COOL ANIME SHADES Builder keeps around at the sprite.

At least this way you can make it look cool.

[font="Arial Black"]=>[/font]

Yep, that's some serious style.

Good thing this coolness will in no way turn against you.

Ever.

Cause that would be silly.

[font="Arial Black"]Some time in the future =>[/font]

OH GOD WHY CAN YOU USE THOSE SHADES AS A SWORD!

WHAT WERE YOU THINKING?
[font="Arial Black"]Well what WERE you thinking =>[/font]

You don't get the question.

It's not like Ogres can use them as swords.

Ogres don't exist stupid.

[font="Arial Black"]Fine go do the second prototyping[/font]
Second wha?
[spoiler=Pesterlog]
[color="#008080"][XF] Hate to interupt.
[XF] 6ut your a6out to die from a meteor.[/color]
[color="#8B0000"][AE] whaT?[/color]
[color="#008080"][color="#008080"][XF] Every 2econd you wa2te a giant rock come2 clo2er to 2quishing you.
[XF] Why didn't you te11 me ear1ier?[/color][/color]
[color="#8B0000"][color="#8B0000"][AE] whY didn'T yoU telL mE earlieR?
[AE] damN iT nO timE foR thiS!
[AE] jusT telL mE whaT tO dO![/color][/color][/spoiler]
[font="Arial Black"][font="Arial Black"][font="Arial Black"]=>[/font][/font][/font]
And he proceeded to tell you, and you proceeded to do it.
It was boring so you don't bother showing it.

You admit, the part where you had to cut open a doll of you was kinda surreal though.

But still.

Anywhere here you are in the Land of Steel and Pain.

Gotta admit it's kinda a freaky name. But it fits you guess, what with all these chains, saw blades and spikes.

Finally some action can be done.

You are doing this bro.

[font="Arial Black"]Make this happen=>[/font]

Sorry, can't let you do that starfox.

That would be interesting.

You'd think that there would be some interesting stuff and not be a boring snorefest didn't you? You thought some action would be here?

But NO! This is WAY TOO STUPID for that.

You have to be the Server Player now!

God I'm awesome.

Sweet Bro and Hella Jeff wishes it can be this ironic.

HERE THAT DAVE? I'M CALLING YOU OUT!
[font="Arial Black"]Leave the narrator=>[/font]
Good idea, he was starting to creep you out anyway.

How high do you have to be do do half the stuff he does?

Might as well see what that Server Player is.

[font="Arial Black"]Sure, why not?=>[/font]
A young troll sits in his repit-

...wait TROLL? Isn't this Earth?
SH[i][/i]IT!

WE MAJORLY FUC[i][/i]KED UP!

[font="Arial Black"]Fix screw up.[/font]

You hasitly go back a few pages and time in NOTEARTH for the planets name.

No one will ever know the difference, god your clever.

[font="Arial Black"]=>[/font]

Right back to da troll.

A troll sits in his Respiteblock.

Right now his Client player is off being irritatingly interesting.

Which is naturally why we are ignoring him.

Kicking entertainment to the curb is the way of Forumlocked.

WHO THE HELL DID YOU THINK THIS WAS!

[font="Arial Black"]Oh joy, narrator's back.=>[/font]
Right, so back to the intro.

Your name is AVIOS THESYMAT and right now you probably should probably be helping Mac but your in the middle of a intro and just don't care to interrupt it.

What you do care about, are your interests. Of particural note is your unique brand of TROLLING JUSTICE which involves EXCESSIVE CYBERNETIC FINGER WAGGING. Besides that you enjoy HEATING MUTILATED CORPSES INTO CONSUMABLE DELIGHTS. Some people call it COOKING but only if they are BORING AND STUPID. You also enjoy DEBATING WITH PEOPLE as well as PUZZLES. Everything is a puzzle if you think about it. But you don't. Cause that doesn't give you time to do cooler stuff. You also enjoy RIDDLING THINGS WITH BULLETS which is SORT OF NECESSARY THANKS TO YOUR CUSTODIAN. Your trolltag is [color="#008080"]xanatosForte [XF][/color] and you [color="#008080"]2peak with the num6er2 of the 1ega1 guardian2.[/color][/spoiler]

[spoiler=Chapter 3]
[font="Arial Black"]Avios: Equip your strife =>[/font]
You go to equip your NEXMART BRAND 5th GRADE REVOLVERS into your 2X6KILLKIND in your strife specibus.

God you love these guns.

The feeling of reloading in the middle of a battle is just so... you wouldn't understand.

In fact....
[font="Arial Black"]Twirl revolvers =>[/font]

OH SWEET TROLL JEGUS YES!

You better stop soon, you tend to get.... carried away from this.

[font="Arial Black"][font="Arial Black"]Troll Client =>[/font][/font]
[spoiler=open pesterlog]
[color="#8B0000"][AE] woW abouT timE!
[AE] I'vE jusT beeN attackeD bY a buncH oF sunglasS wearinG blacK thingS[/color]
[color="#008080"][XF] Mac..... that'2 raci2t.[/color]
[color="#8B0000"][AE] waiT, whaT?
[AE] nO thesE thingS arE likE impS oR somethinG[/color]
[color="#008080"][XF] Oh 2o it'2 coo1 to make fun of di2a6i11itie2 now?
[XF] I'm a2hamed to be your 2erver player.[/color]
[color="#8B0000"][AE] finE i'M a rasicT whateveR jusT helP![/color]
[color="#008080"][color="#008080"][XF] havE yoU alchimizeD anythinG?[/color][/color]
[color="#8B0000"][color="#8B0000"][AE] noT yeT, stilL lookinG foR somethinG foR a tiertwO prototypE
[AE] thesE floatinG sunglasseS arE freakinG mE ouT
[AE] besideS I don'T neeD anY exacT duplicateS oF stufF yeT[/color][/color]
[color="#008080"][color="#008080"][XF] Fine, fine, ju2t keep working.
[XF] Each hate crime you commit gives you some sweet 1oot to 2nag.[/color][/color]
[color="#8B0000"][color="#8B0000"][AE] joY[/color][/color]
[color="#008080"][XF] Anyway, I got to feed Mom, he'2 up.
[XF] Why did he choo2e that name anyway?
[XF] 2tupid.[/color][/spoiler]

[font="Arial Black"][font="Arial Black"]Go feed your mom. =>[/font][/font]
This is why you have to keep hunting stuff. Demon dragon lusus's tend to be extremely hungry.
You usually hate to throw a deer at him and hopes he cooks it himself with his fire breath.

In case it wasn't obvious, demonic dragons are real.

Also they are a huge b**** to feed.

Luckily your an expert at this by now and don't even have to go through a lengthly fight scenario before your lusus realizes your not food.

[font="Arial Black"][font="Arial Black"][s]Ask lusus to stop being called mom when it is clearly a boy =>[/font][/font]

OH HULKING MUSCLEBEAST STRIFE!
[url="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pBBrk3UwJdw"]Click me[/url]

Dear god that was intense. IT is only thanks to Mom's CRIPPLING HEARTBURN that you got away.

Got to admit, that is one burning soul she has.

Shame it seems to be dedicated to killing you.
[font="arial black"]Mac: Finally do the tier 2 prototype =>[/font]
You through a toy robot at the prototype. It's batteries were dead.

Hah, like that would ever work...

[font="arial black"]=>[/font]
Sonofabitch, that actually worked.

[b]Converse Robsprite =>[/b]
[spoiler=Pesterlog]
[color="#FF00FF"][RS] Well, finally back online! <3
[RS] You took your sweet time didn't you? </3[/color]
[color="#8B0000"][color="#8B0000"][AE] geezE sorrY
[AE] I didn'T knoW thiS waS eveN possiblE[/color][/color]
[color="#FF00FF"][color="#FF00FF"][RS] I forgive you.
[RS] But only cause you look so cute when your sad. <3[/color][/color]
[color="#8B0000"][color="#8B0000"][AE]....
[AE] whaT?[/color][/color]
[color="#FF00FF"][color="#FF00FF"][RS] Your even cuter scared! <3
[RS] I could just pick you up and give you a big huge! <3[/color][/color]
[color="#8B0000"][color="#8B0000"][AE][/color][/color] has blocked [color="#FF00FF"][RS][/color]
[/spoiler]
[font="Arial Black"]=>[/font]
WHY IS THE ROBOT FLIRTING WITH YOU?

WHY?

Oh great, now your crying.

Wiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiimp.
[font="Arial Black"]Avios: Be less of a pussy then Mac =>[/font]
You are a bit annoyed by the question but you go ahead and do that.

You start to get the munchies so you head downstairs to make some EXTREMELY GOURMET INSTANT RAMEN.

Along the way, you pass buy the many JUVINILE CARD GAMES your MOM keeps around. They are pretty fun you'd admit but you don't like the annoying ONLINE GAME that she keeps playing that keeps BREAKING DOWN AS THE GAMEGRUBS GET CANCER. That is just dumb.

Oh look, someone is pestering you.

Good thing you are a TEXTING WHIZ otherwise you wouldn't be able to talk to him.

[font="Arial Black"]Talk to the new guy.[/font][spoiler=PESTERLOG WOMBO COMBO][center]
[color="#9ACD32"][color="#9ACD32"]legallyBrewed [LB][/color][/color] began trolling [color="#008080"][color="#008080"]xanatosForte [XF][/color][/color] at whenever.[/center]
[color="#008080"][XF] Oh hey, the half6reed.
[XF] What is it?[/color]
[color="#9ACD32"][color="#9ACD32"][LB] sTOp cALLINg me tHAt!
[LB] so sOMEHOw i dEFy lOGIc.[/color][/color]
[color="#008080"][color="#008080"]Who the he11 care2?[/color][/color]
[color="#9ACD32"][LB] wHo tHe hELl cAREs?
[LB] dAMNIt![/color]
[color="#008080"][color="#008080"][XF] Dude, ca1m down.
[XF] 2erio21y.[/color][/color]
[color="#9ACD32"][LB] FinE, JusT PleasE StoP ThaT.
[LB] I GeT EnougH s*** AlreadY.
[LB] SO WE PlayinG ThiS GamE?[/color]
[color="#008080"][color="#008080"][XF] Natura11y, that wou1d be 1ogica1.[/color][/color]
[color="#9ACD32"][LB] DamN RighT IT WoulD BE.
[LB] IF LogiC WaS A ShapelY WomaN I WoulD TotallY DatE IT.
[LB] IF IT WaS A DudE WE WoulD BE StalwarT BrO PalS.[/color]
[color="#008080"][XF] ...okay. We11, I probba1y need to kept Mac from ki11ing him2e1f with that 1ance of hi2.[/color]
[color="#9ACD32"][LB] WaiT, WhaT?[/color][/spoiler]

Author's Note: I think it is safe to say we are all a little hard right now.

[font="Arial Black"]Mac: get minimodded=>[/font]
[spoiler=open pesterlog]
[color="#4B0082"]vengefullyDefective [VD][/color] began modding [color="#8B0000"]atomyckEmpire[/color] at who knows.

[color="#4B0082"][color="#4B0082"][font="Arial Narrow"][font="Arial Narrow"][VD] st()p_ crying_ nimr()d_
[VD] y()ur_ supp()sed_ t()_ be_ better_ than_ that_
[VD] fuck_ every()ne_ is_ supp()sed_ t()_ be_ better_ than_ this_[/font][/font][/color][/color]
[color="#8B0000"][AE] whY dO I havE tO deaL witH botH yoU anD heR?
[AE] whY?[/color]
[color="#4B0082"][font="Arial Narrow"][VD] ()h_ sm()()th_ make_ him_ cry_ harder_
[VD] fuck_ i_ never_ g()t_ this_ shit_
[VD] l()()k_ im_ here_ t()_ sh()w_ y()u_ s()mething_ sweet_
[VD] have_ y()u_ tried_ mixing_ the_ punch_ cards_[/font][/color]
[color="#8B0000"][color="#8B0000"][AE] nO?[/color][/color]
[color="#4B0082"][font="Arial Narrow"][VD]l()()k_ just_ fucking_ try_ it_
[VD] y()u're_ the_ ()nly_ pers()n_ wh()_ wasnt_ a_ c()mplete_ fuckface_ t()_ me_
[VD] this_ is_ the_ least_ i_ can_ d()_ [/font][/color]

[center][color="#4B0082"][VD][/color] has banned himself from the convo[/center]
[color="#8B0000"][color="#8B0000"][AE] waiT
[AE] whO arE yoU?
[AE] whaT iS goinG oN?[/color][/color] [/spoiler]
[font="Arial Black"]What the hell was that?=>[/font]
We may never know, though probably for the best.

He seemed like a prick.

[font="Arial Black"]Be a fly =>[/font]
Oh f*** yes, this is like the greatest idea you ever had.

Your name is Bugzy Mcbuzztin and-

You just got killed by a ogre.

WHY MUST THE COOL DIE YOUNG?

[font="Arial Black"]Avios: Commit funeral rites for Bugzy[/font]
Who?
[font="Arial Black"][font="Arial Black"]I guess it's not important. But you need to get into the medium posthaste!=>[/font][/font]

Oh right, your about to die from a giant rock.

Completely slipped your mind.

It's just that this ramen is so delicious...

[font="Arial Black"]CONTACT THE BIPOLAR TROLL GUY DAMN YOU!=>[/font]
Okay fine! Geeze!
[spoiler=Pesterlog]
[color="#008080"]XF] He11o?
[XF] Hope, I'm not intruding 6ut can you hurry up?
[XF] There i2 thi2 thing a6out dieing I find dista2tefu1 for 2ome a1ien rea2on.[/color]
[color="#9ACD32"][LB] SorrY ReallY BusY.
[LB] f*** im noT gONNa pLAy tHIs bs gAMe
[LB] gEt tHOSe fUCKIn sEEd sPITTERs oFf me![/color]
[color="#008080"][XF]... Fine, go be weird.[/color]
[/spoiler]
[font="Arial Black"][font="Arial Black"]=>[/font][/font]

Well that could have gone better.

On the bright side, looks like Mac was busy while you were gone.

[font="Arial Black"]Mac commence Alcimizing orgy=>[/font]

Oh sweet jegus yes.

WEIRD DRILL THING//Lance= SPINSTICK
SPINSTICK&&TTGL POSTER= STICK THAT WILL PIERCE THE HEAVENS
CODE GEASS POSTER//PROTOMAN HELMET= UNIONIZING MINDJACK HELM
ROCKETSHIP MODEL&& SNEAKERS= ULTINIKE
FF V//BUISNESS SUIT=THE GARB OF EXTREMELY MAINLY MEN!
ZERO WATCH&&BUILDER'S SUPERCOMP= NEXMART iDIE 2.4

Wow, that is pretty damn sweet gear.

Good thing VG wired you all that Grist.

Where did he get that much anyway?

[font="Arial Black"]Mac: Brag to your lawyer friend=>[/font]
[spoiler=pesterchum]
[color="#8B0000"][color="#8B0000"][AE] dudE looK aT thiS sweeT geaR I goT.
[AE] onE oF thosE modS showeD mE hoW.[/color][/color]
[color="#008080"][XF] Pretty impre2ive. The ru1e6ook 2ay2 you 2hou1den't even 6e a61e to get thi2 2tuff yet for a 1ong time.
[XF] I gue22 that'2 a gift of you2, making a11ie2.[/color]
[color="#8B0000"][color="#8B0000"][AE] huH, cooL I guesS.
[AE] sO, hoW arE thingS aT youR enD?[/color][/color]
[color="#008080"][XF] Meh, he'2 6eing a 1azy douche.[/color]
[/spoiler]
[font="Arial Black"][font="Arial Black"]Be the lazy douche=>[/font][/font]
You'll do it later.
[font="Arial Black"][S]Kill narrator=>[/font]

Whoa, no need to jump da gun.

I'm doing it, okay? Sheesh.
[url="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B03aycvn0sM&feature=related"]Click me[/url]
So your fighting your ravenous angel lusus who is swarming you with a legion of plants.

You left your mic on while fighting so you could talk to Avios.

Pretty logical day isn't it.

Of course f***ing not stupid!

You miss the day when things made sense.

Oh, btw. STRIFE!!
[font="Arial Black"][font="Arial Black"]Finish this fight=>[/font][/font]
Hey Saint? Why don't you chill off?

Hahahaha... man that sucks.

Whatever, Saint is not in any position to criticize you, what with a refrigerator falling on his head.

Some times your psichonic powers scare you.

[font="Arial Black"][font="Arial Black"]Intro time=>[/font][/font]
Yes, let's do that.

Your name is Kelvin Judical, and once the world made sense. You missed those days. Then for some reason your Lusus started getting antsy and things have been off the rocker. This is cause you and him share MINOR UNIVERSEBENDING POWERS. Probbaly on account of your status as a FREAK OF NATURE. No one even knows how HumanXtroll matespriting ever worked in the first place. But ever since Nexcorp announced that Sburb game, s***'s been crazy.

What is not crazy are your interests. One is DELICOUS BEVERAGES, particuraly ones that KEEP YOU UP ALL NIGHT. You also enjoy ORCASTRATED SOUND like just about all your friends. You also enjoy MIND GAMES, such as PUZZLES. God you love puzzles. If puzzles were a young and shapely woman you would GO ON A ROMANTIC DINNER WITH HER. Your trollhandle is [color="#9ACD32"][color="#9ACD32"][/color]legallyBrewed [LB][/color] and you [color="#9ACD32"]SeE BotH SideS UnlesS bLINDEd by rAEg!!![color="#808000"][/color][/color]

[font="Arial Black"]Be konami! =>[/font]
You put on your NEXCORP RED-BLUE COMPUVISOR and began to dictate to your card game minions about the new ban list.

First we shall ban stardus-
No, damn it! This madness is getting to you too! You don't ask for much, you don't ask for the world to suddenly change to normal. You just want to be able to add two to two and get four like everyone should.

Why is that not possible?

[font="Arial Black"]Equip strife=>[/font]

You don't usually need one do to your FREAK PSYCHIC POWERS but you have trouble channeling them. f*** you need the visor just to keep them in control. Much like Earth's Cyclops that you have no idea about because THIS IS NOTEARTH!

You equip the Visorkind and your Glovekind to your strife portfolio.

BTW you can use the glove to use psychic powers as well.

Right now you can only use a weak TELEKINISES and a blast of CAFFEINATED ENERGY.

You will get more powers as more gloves and visors are alchimized but you don't know that yet.

[font="Arial Black"][font="Arial Black"]Kelvin Converse with friend=>[/font][/font]
[spoiler=open pesterlog][color="#9ACD32"][color="#9ACD32"][LB] RighT, I'M AbouT TO GeT YoU IN.
[LB] HolD ON, SomeonE AT ThE DooR
[LB] JusT StarT LoadinG
[LB] ow sOn of a b****! [/color][/color][/spoiler]
[font="Arial Black"]Avios Wonder what happened? =>[/font]
He's been gone for awhile. Is everything okay? Hang on, your getting a message.

[font="Arial Black"]Avios: Get minimodded[/font]
[spoiler=Pesterlog][color="#00FFFF"][font="Franklin Gothic Medium"]faithfullyXenophilic [FX][/font][/color] began conversing with [color="#008080"]xanatosForte [XF][/color]
[font="Franklin Gothic Medium"][color="#00FFFF"][FX] Fir5t, 91ea5e don't get too mad.[/color][/font][color="#008080"]
[XF] Why wou1d I get mad?
[XF] What'2 going on?[/color]
[color="#00FFFF"][font="Franklin Gothic Medium"][FX] We11 if you 9romi5e.
Ke1vin can't be your 5erver.[/font][/color]
[color="#008080"][color="#008080"][XF] Why?[/color][/color]
[font="Franklin Gothic Medium"][color="#00FFFF"][FX] Konami kidna9ed him.
Anyway I'm going to have to be your 5erver in5tead.[/color][/font]
[color="#008080"][XF] ...
[XF] What?[/color]
[font="Franklin Gothic Medium"][color="#00FFFF"][color="#00FFFF"][FX] No time. Ex91ain 1ater. 91ea53 hurry? VD to1d me dying wa5 bad.[/color][/color]
[/font]
[center][center]
[color="#00FFFF"][color="#00FFFF"][FX][/color][/color] Banned herself from convo[/center][/center]

[color="#008080"][XF] WaiT!
DAMMIT![/color][/spoiler]

[font="Arial Black"][font="Arial Black"][S] Abscond from the darkness[/font][/font]
[url="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0_7XTALrIDY&feature=related"]Click me[/url]


Kelvin put up the good fight, but that green lightening blast just knocked him flat. What is Konami's motives in all this?

Who is the mysterious minimods, what are they up to?

I guess we aren't meant to know yet.

Mac is clearing out his house of the swarm of bad guys, yet more seem to be popping up, Avios had to shoot himself with his cruxtite revolver.

And now all the minions have been prototyped with revolvers. They now have gun hands.

Way to go.
[/spoiler]

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Amethyst Phoenix Newbie

Amethyst Phoenix

Posted
Posted
[spoiler=List of Command Suggestions For Whenever]
Avios: Retrieve arms from drawer

Avios: Unnecessarily spin revolvers for a ludicrous period of time.

Mac: Pilot some sick mechas.


*Insert Character Here*: ACTIVATE THE HORSE!

[/spoiler]


I'll add crap to this list every once in a while.

This thing is awesome and I'm glad you're doing it bro.

I can't believe what you made occur.
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Nexev Newbie

Nexev

Posted
  • Author
Posted
[quote name='Revolver Amethyst' timestamp='1292121873' post='4845635']
This thing is awesome and I'm glad you're doing it bro.

I can't believe what you made occur.
[/quote]

[font="Arial Black"]Nexev: furiously stroke ego =>[/font]
Ooooh, yes your so awesome... right there.... oh! OH!


You just had a smugasm.

Your PERCULOMETER just skyrocketed dangerously into the red zone. You have a fever of weirdness.

Cowbell is most likely NOT the cure.
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Nexev Newbie

Nexev

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[font="Arial Black"]Avios: Equip your strife =>[/font]
You go to equip your NEXMART BRAND 5th GRADE REVOLVERS into your 2X6KILLKIND in your strife specibus.

God you love these guns.

The feeling of reloading in the middle of a battle is just so... you wouldn't understand.

In fact....
[font="Arial Black"]Twirl revolvers =>[/font]

OH SWEET TROLL JEGUS YES!

You better stop soon, you tend to get.... carried away from this.

[font="Arial Black"][font="Arial Black"]Troll Client =>[/font][/font]
[spoiler=open pesterlog]
[color="#8B0000"][AE] woW abouT timE!
[AE] I'vE jusT beeN attackeD bY a buncH oF sunglasS wearinG blacK thingS[/color]
[color="#008080"][XF] Mac..... that'2 raci2t.[/color]
[color="#8B0000"][AE] waiT, whaT?
[AE] nO thesE thingS arE likE impS oR somethinG[/color]
[color="#008080"][XF] Oh 2o it'2 coo1 to make fun of di2a6i11itie2 now?
[XF] I'm a2hamed to be your 2erver player.[/color]
[color="#8B0000"][AE] finE i'M a rasicT whateveR jusT helP![/color]
[color="#008080"][color="#008080"][XF] havE yoU alchimizeD anythinG?[/color][/color]
[color="#8B0000"][color="#8B0000"][AE] noT yeT, stilL lookinG foR somethinG foR a tiertwO prototypE
[AE] thesE floatinG sunglasseS arE freakinG mE ouT
[AE] besideS I don'T neeD anY exacT duplicateS oF stufF yeT[/color][/color]
[color="#008080"][color="#008080"][XF] Fine, fine, ju2t keep working.
[XF] Each hate crime you commit gives you some sweet 1oot to 2nag.[/color][/color]
[color="#8B0000"][color="#8B0000"][AE] joY[/color][/color]
[color="#008080"][XF] Anyway, I got to feed Mom, he'2 up.
[XF] Why did he choo2e that name anyway?
[XF] 2tupid.[/color][/spoiler]

[font="Arial Black"][font="Arial Black"]Go feed your mom. =>[/font][/font]
This is why you have to keep hunting stuff. Demon dragon lusus's tend to be extremely hungry.
You usually hate to throw a deer at him and hopes he cooks it himself with his fire breath.

In case it wasn't obvious, demonic dragons are real.

Also they are a huge b**** to feed.

Luckily your an expert at this by now and don't even have to go through a lengthly fight scenario before your lusus realizes your not food.

[font="Arial Black"][font="Arial Black"][s]Ask lusus to stop being called mom when it is clearly a boy =>[/font][/font]

OH HULKING MUSCLEBEAST STRIFE!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pBBrk3UwJdw

Dear god that was intense. IT is only thanks to Mom's CRIPPLING HEARTBURN that you got away.

Got to admit, that is one burning soul she has.

Shame it seems to be dedicated to killing you.
[font="arial black"]Mac: Finally do the tier 2 prototype =>[/font]
You through a toy robot at the prototype. It's batteries were dead.

Hah, like that would ever work...

[font="arial black"]=>[/font]
Sonofabitch, that actually worked.
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Nexev Newbie

Nexev

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Posted
[b]Converse Robsprite =>[/b]
[spoiler=Pesterlog]
[color="#FF00FF"][RS] Well, finally back online! <3
[RS] You took your sweet time didn't you? </3[/color]
[color="#8B0000"][color="#8B0000"][AE] geezE sorrY
[AE] I didn'T knoW thiS waS eveN possiblE[/color][/color]
[color="#FF00FF"][color="#FF00FF"][RS] I forgive you.
[RS] But only cause you look so cute when your sad. <3[/color][/color]
[color="#8B0000"][color="#8B0000"][AE]....
[AE] whaT?[/color][/color]
[color="#FF00FF"][color="#FF00FF"][RS] Your even cuter scared! <3
[RS] I could just pick you up and give you a big huge! <3[/color][/color]
[color="#8B0000"][color="#8B0000"][AE][/color][/color] has blocked [color="#FF00FF"][RS][/color]
[/spoiler]
[font="Arial Black"]=>[/font]
WHY IS THE ROBOT FLIRTING WITH YOU?

WHY?

Oh great, now your crying.

Wiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiimp.
[font="Arial Black"]Avios: Be less of a pussy then Mac =>[/font]
You are a bit annoyed by the question but you go ahead and do that.

You start to get the munchies so you head downstairs to make some EXTREMELY GOURMET INSTANT RAMEN.

Along the way, you pass buy the many JUVINILE CARD GAMES your MOM keeps around. They are pretty fun you'd admit but you don't like the annoying ONLINE GAME that she keeps playing that keeps BREAKING DOWN AS THE GAMEGRUBS GET CANCER. That is just dumb.

Oh look, someone is pestering you.

Good thing you are a TEXTING WHIZ otherwise you wouldn't be able to talk to him.

[font="Arial Black"]Talk to the new guy.[/font][spoiler=PESTERLOG WOMBO COMBO][center]
[color="#9ACD32"][color="#9ACD32"]legallyBrewed [LB][/color][/color] began trolling [color="#008080"][color="#008080"]xanatosForte [XF][/color][/color] at whenever.[/center]
[color="#008080"][XF] Oh hey, the half6reed.
[XF] What is it?[/color]
[color="#9ACD32"][color="#9ACD32"][LB] sTOp cALLINg me tHAt!
[LB] so sOMEHOw i dEFy lOGIc.[/color][/color]
[color="#008080"][color="#008080"]Who the he11 care2?[/color][/color]
[color="#9ACD32"][LB] wHo tHe hELl cAREs?
[LB] dAMNIt![/color]
[color="#008080"][color="#008080"][XF] Dude, ca1m down.
[XF] 2erio21y.[/color][/color]
[color="#9ACD32"][LB] FinE, JusT PleasE StoP ThaT.
[LB] I GeT EnougH s*** AlreadY.
[LB] SO WE PlayinG ThiS GamE?[/color]
[color="#008080"][color="#008080"][XF] Natura11y, that wou1d be 1ogica1.[/color][/color]
[color="#9ACD32"][LB] DamN RighT IT WoulD BE.
[LB] IF LogiC WaS A ShapelY WomaN I WoulD TotallY DatE IT.
[LB] IF IT WaS A DudE WE WoulD BE StalwarT BrO PalS.[/color]
[color="#008080"][XF] ...okay. We11, I probba1y need to kept Mac from ki11ing him2e1f with that 1ance of hi2.[/color]
[color="#9ACD32"][LB] WaiT, WhaT?[/color][/spoiler]

Author's Note: I think it is safe to say we are all a little hard right now.
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Nexev Newbie

Nexev

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Posted
[font="Arial Black"]Mac: get minimodded=>[/font]
[spoiler=open pesterlog]
[color="#4B0082"]vengefullyDefective [VD][/color] began modding [color="#8B0000"]atomyckEmpire[/color] at who knows.

[color="#4B0082"][color="#4B0082"][font="Arial Narrow"][font="Arial Narrow"][VD] st()p_ crying_ nimr()d_
[VD] y()ur_ supp()sed_ t()_ be_ better_ than_ that_
[VD] fuck_ every()ne_ is_ supp()sed_ t()_ be_ better_ than_ this_[/font][/font][/color][/color]
[color="#8B0000"][AE] whY dO I havE tO deaL witH botH yoU anD heR?
[AE] whY?[/color]
[color="#4B0082"][font="Arial Narrow"][VD] ()h_ sm()()th_ make_ him_ cry_ harder_
[VD] fuck_ i_ never_ g()t_ this_ shit_
[VD] l()()k_ im_ here_ t()_ sh()w_ y()u_ s()mething_ sweet_
[VD] have_ y()u_ tried_ mixing_ the_ punch_ cards_[/font][/color]
[color="#8B0000"][color="#8B0000"][AE] nO?[/color][/color]
[color="#4B0082"][font="Arial Narrow"][VD]l()()k_ just_ fucking_ try_ it_
[VD] y()u're_ the_ ()nly_ pers()n_ wh()_ wasnt_ a_ c()mplete_ fuckface_ t()_ me_
[VD] this_ is_ the_ least_ i_ can_ d()_ [/font][/color]

[center][color="#4B0082"][VD][/color] has banned himself from the convo[/center]
[color="#8B0000"][color="#8B0000"][AE] waiT
[AE] whO arE yoU?
[AE] whaT iS goinG oN?[/color][/color] [/spoiler]
[font="Arial Black"]What the hell was that?=>[/font]
We may never know, though probably for the best.

He seemed like a prick.

[font="Arial Black"]Be a fly =>[/font]
Oh f*** yes, this is like the greatest idea you ever had.

Your name is Bugzy Mcbuzztin and-

You just got killed by a ogre.

WHY MUST THE COOL DIE YOUNG?

[font="Arial Black"]Avios: Commit funeral rites for Bugzy[/font]
Who?
[font="Arial Black"][font="Arial Black"]I guess it's not important. But you need to get into the medium posthaste!=>[/font][/font]

Oh right, your about to die from a giant rock.

Completely slipped your mind.

It's just that this ramen is so delicious...

[font="Arial Black"]CONTACT THE BIPOLAR TROLL GUY DAMN YOU!=>[/font]
Okay fine! Geeze!
[spoiler=Pesterlog]
[color="#008080"]XF] He11o?
[XF] Hope, I'm not intruding 6ut can you hurry up?
[XF] There i2 thi2 thing a6out dieing I find dista2tefu1 for 2ome a1ien rea2on.[/color]
[color="#9ACD32"][LB] SorrY ReallY BusY.
[LB] f*** im noT gONNa pLAy tHIs bs gAMe
[LB] gEt tHOSe fUCKIn sEEd sPITTERs oFf me![/color]
[color="#008080"][XF]... Fine, go be weird.[/color]
[/spoiler]
[font="Arial Black"][font="Arial Black"]=>[/font][/font]

Well that could have gone better.

On the bright side, looks like Mac was busy while you were gone.
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