Soul Saint Posted January 28, 2011 Report Share Posted January 28, 2011 16 We can do this men! Remember, if we win we get something shiny as a prize! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
M.B X Posted January 28, 2011 Report Share Posted January 28, 2011 THATS IT YOU HAVE DONE IT NOW LRL! 17. [quote]One night a man walks into a bar looking sad. The bartender asks the man what he wants. The man says "Oh just a beer". The bartender asked the man "Whats wrong,why are you so down today?". The man said "My wife and i got into a fight,and she said she would'nt talk to me for a month". The bartender said "So whats wrong with that"? The man siad "Well the month is up tonight".[/quote] ------ [quote]One bright, beautiful Sunday morning, everyone in tiny Smithville wakes up early and goes to their local church. Before the service starts, the townspeople sit in their pews and talk about their lives, their families, etc. Suddenly, at the altar, Satan appears!! Everyone starts screaming and running for the front entrance, trampling each other in their determined efforts to get away from Evil Incarnate. Soon, everyone is evacuated from the church except for one man, who sit calmly in his pew, seemingly oblivious to the fact that God's ultimate enemy is in his presence. This confuses Satan a bit. Satan walks up to the man and says, "Hey, don't you know who I am?" The man says, "Yep, sure do." Satan says, "Well, aren't you afraid of me?" The man says, "Nope, sure ain't." Satan, perturbed, says, "And why aren't you afraid of me?" "Well, I've been married to your sister for 25 years."[/quote] SHE MADE ME DO IT! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Soul Saint Posted January 28, 2011 Report Share Posted January 28, 2011 18 Those were both very nice one's, I must admit. You could start a club off those jokes if the Mod's don't mind. xD Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
M.B X Posted January 28, 2011 Report Share Posted January 28, 2011 lol! Maybe i will except that i didn't make them, that is why they are quoted. Anyway, 19. Lets keep this up Soul Saint, kk? We will be the Alpha Duo! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Soul Saint Posted January 28, 2011 Report Share Posted January 28, 2011 20 Sweet! But do I have to wear a ribbon? I'm forced to when Paranoia is around. T.T Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
M.B X Posted January 28, 2011 Report Share Posted January 28, 2011 Nah! lol! Casual is fine! 21. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Soul Saint Posted January 28, 2011 Report Share Posted January 28, 2011 22 Yes! Freedom from the oppression! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
M.B X Posted January 28, 2011 Report Share Posted January 28, 2011 23. Enough said. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heavens Guardian Posted January 28, 2011 Report Share Posted January 28, 2011 20 haha I stop u Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Soul Saint Posted January 28, 2011 Report Share Posted January 28, 2011 21 We are being oppressed! D: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
endphase Posted January 28, 2011 Report Share Posted January 28, 2011 22 [size="7"]Yes, we can![/size] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Soul Saint Posted January 28, 2011 Report Share Posted January 28, 2011 23 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheLegenderyKingVildeChaya Posted January 28, 2011 Report Share Posted January 28, 2011 24 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Soul Saint Posted January 28, 2011 Report Share Posted January 28, 2011 24 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheLegenderyKingVildeChaya Posted January 28, 2011 Report Share Posted January 28, 2011 [quote name='Soul Saint' timestamp='1296251625' post='4968685'] 24 [/quote] you mean 25 so [b]26[/b] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kelp' Posted January 28, 2011 Report Share Posted January 28, 2011 23 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heavens Guardian Posted January 29, 2011 Report Share Posted January 29, 2011 20 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
M.B X Posted January 29, 2011 Report Share Posted January 29, 2011 21. Why can't women drive? Because there's no road between the kitchen and the bedroom. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Soul Saint Posted January 29, 2011 Report Share Posted January 29, 2011 22 ^Rep Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
M.B X Posted January 29, 2011 Report Share Posted January 29, 2011 23. One more maybe? [spoiler='Its a big one, so it hides in a spoiler :/']A woman and man get into a car accident. Both of their cars are totally demolished, but amazingly neither of them is hurt. After they crawl out of the wreckage, the woman says, "Wow, look at our cars - there's nothing left! Thank God we are all right. This must be a sign from Him that we should be friends and not try to pin the blame on each other." The man replies, "Oh yes, I agree with you completely." The woman points to a bottle on the ground and says, "And here's another miracle. Somehow this bottle of Scotch from my back seat didn't break. Surely God wants us to drink this Scotch and celebrate our good fortune." Then she hands the bottle to the man. The man nods his head in agreement, opens it, and chugs about a third of the bottle to calm his nerves. He then hands it back to the woman. The woman takes the bottle, immediately puts the cap back on, and hands it back to the man. The man asks, "Aren't you having any?" The woman replies, "No. I think I'll just wait for the police..."[/spoiler] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tourmaline Posted January 29, 2011 Report Share Posted January 29, 2011 24 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
M.B X Posted January 29, 2011 Report Share Posted January 29, 2011 25. John (now Jean) is walking down the street after a sex-change operation has transformed him into a beautiful women. His old friend Pete sees him and says, "John, you look great...you're beautiful!" John says, "Thanks...but holy Christ, did it hurt." Pete says, "When they cut open your chest and put in those implants?" John says, "No, that didn't really hurt." Pete says, "When they cut off your dick and dug out a vagina?" John says, "No, that didn't really hurt." Pete says, "Then what did hurt?" John says, "When the doctor drilled a f***ing hole in my head and sucked out half my brain." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heavens Guardian Posted January 29, 2011 Report Share Posted January 29, 2011 22 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
M.B X Posted January 29, 2011 Report Share Posted January 29, 2011 23. [quote]As you lie back your muscles tighten. You put him off for a while searching for an excuse, but he refuses to be swayed as he approaches you. He asks if you're afraid and you shake your head bravely. He has had more experience, but it's the first time his finger has found the right place. He probes deeply and you shiver; your body tenses; but he's gentle like he promised he'd be. He looks deeply within your eyes and tells you to trust him-he's done this many times before. His cool smile relaxes you and you open wider to give him more room for an easy entrance. You begin to plead and beg him to hurry, but he slowly takes his time, wanting to cause you as little pain as possible. As he presses closer, going deeper, you feel the tissue give way; pain surges throughout your body and you feel the slight trickle of blood as he continues. He looks at you concerned and asks you if it's too painful. Your eyes are filled with tears but you shake your head and nod for him to go on. He begins going in and out with skill but you are now too numb to feel him within you. After a few moments, you feel something bursting within you and he pulls it out of you, you lay panting, glad to have it over. He looks at you and smiling warmly, tells you, with a chuckle; that you have been his most stubborn yet most rewarding experience. You smile and thank your dentist. After all, it was your first time to have a tooth pulled. Naughty, Naughty! Excuse me, What were you thinkin'? [/quote] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heavens Guardian Posted January 29, 2011 Report Share Posted January 29, 2011 20 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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