Danilus Posted May 20, 2007 Report Share Posted May 20, 2007 The ventilation system of any building is the perfect hiding place. No one will ever think of looking for you in there and you can travel to any other part of the building you want without difficulty. When paying for a taxi, don't look at your wallet as you take out a bill - just grab one at random and hand it over. It will always be the exact fare. Television news bulletins usually contain a story that affects you personally at that precise moment. It does not matter if you are heavily outnumbered in a fight involving martial arts - your enemies will wait patiently to attack you one by one by dancing around in a threatening manner until you have knocked out their predecessors. Cars and trucks that crash will almost always burst into flames. One man shooting at 20 men has a better chance of killing them all than 20 men firing at one. When they are alone, all foreigners prefer to speak English to each other. Any computer, anywhere, even in the jungle, can hack into the most secure goverment system. All telephone numbers in America begin with the digits 555. :) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sander Posted May 20, 2007 Report Share Posted May 20, 2007 that's so true Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Frunk Posted May 20, 2007 Report Share Posted May 20, 2007 After reading the title, I thought it was another pornography spam :lol: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shaco Posted May 20, 2007 Report Share Posted May 20, 2007 Yeah, I kinda did too, until I saw the author Did you make those all up, or did you get them from some sight? That Martial Arts thing always bothered me. It wouldn't be so bad, but in the end the hero always has to go against 1 man and it's always a thousand times harder than those 10,000 people he knocked out with 1 punch. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr. Best Male 2008 Posted May 20, 2007 Report Share Posted May 20, 2007 we aso learn in movies that guns dont kill people kill people guns defend people agaisnt people with smaller guns :lol: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Axiom_Nor Posted May 20, 2007 Report Share Posted May 20, 2007 without looking at the tiltle this makes no sence but it all is so true Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Slime Lord Posted May 20, 2007 Report Share Posted May 20, 2007 I've read these before. It was on some great list of movie cliches. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Weather Duelist Posted May 21, 2007 Report Share Posted May 21, 2007 I got one... If everything seems to revolve aroudn you, then one of two things will happen: 1. You are guarenteed to survive anything, no matter how bad. or 2. Youa re guarenteed to die a superb, dramatic, heroic death, nd there will always be someone to avenge you. if not, then you probably f**ken sacrificed yourself... oh, and one more:No matter what the situation, there is always time for a grand monologue by the culprit, followed by time for arguement between the hero and culprit, and then ending with a few witty lines. You are guarenteed safe as long as the two remain talking. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Slime Lord Posted May 22, 2007 Report Share Posted May 22, 2007 Here is some more... 1)The phone rings. Hero/Heroine picks it up. "Hello. Yes. O.k. Right. Thanks, Goodbye." (Total elapsed time on phone: 5 seconds.)2)No one uses the restroom, except as a venue for escape. If there are multiple people in the restroom, expect a minor character revealation while they stand at the mirror 3)A dying person's last words will always be coherent and significant.4)A villain will always commit murder right in front of the window when someone with binoculars is watching. Thats all I can think of right now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Weather Duelist Posted May 22, 2007 Report Share Posted May 22, 2007 OH!!! We forgot the biggest one!!! Every plan made, no matter how organised it is, will fall apart halfway through its being carried out. (Also known as the Scooby Doo Law) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BS Posted May 22, 2007 Report Share Posted May 22, 2007 Whoever has the smaller gun will always win. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Weather Duelist Posted May 22, 2007 Report Share Posted May 22, 2007 Weapons capable of super mass destruction has a mandatory warming up period before it actually fires. This time varies, but usually its just enough time for a long and drawn out showdown, and then ending with the weapon always shut down at the last counting unit to zero. (In many cases it is 1, however, there are some cases where it is .1 or more commonly .01) This leads to the second law: All terrible bombs and machines cannot be shutdown until its timer has reach the last digit before zero. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Frunk Posted May 22, 2007 Report Share Posted May 22, 2007 Once an enemy, always an enemy, no matter whether or not they decide to help you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TotalObelisk Posted May 22, 2007 Report Share Posted May 22, 2007 Lol, so true. And not forgetting: If the chances of something happening are 1 in a million, then 9 times out of ten they happen! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Quicksilver Posted May 22, 2007 Report Share Posted May 22, 2007 Police scanners only work when your girlfriend comes over (Spiderman 3)Snakes can be put on a plane without any problems (self explanatory)Automatic weapons never hit a target, not even once.Soldiers do not rely on Air Strikes when it is believed there are strong enemy forces in front of them (Full Metal jacket)Torture scenes rarely leave a person traumatised, let alone dead, and should that person being tortured survive, their captors will not. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Frunk Posted May 22, 2007 Report Share Posted May 22, 2007 No matter how many times the actor changes, James Bond will never provide any of his collegues with any explanation as to his new face. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
darkguy00000 Posted May 22, 2007 Report Share Posted May 22, 2007 Putting on a pair of glasses and acting mild-mannered will make your friends unable to distinguish you from the superhero you are. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Danilus Posted May 22, 2007 Author Report Share Posted May 22, 2007 Here are some more. If you are being chased by zombies run as fast as you can, even though they can barely walk they will still catch up with you. Secret agents cannot drown because they have special lungs that allow them to breathe forever. If you desire to send any car into flame for any given reason, just shoot it three times, even though in real life you could stand right infront of a vechile and shoot the gun into the gas tank, it wouldnt ignite the fuel, only 1 or 2 bullets in the world can cause a spark, and it seems every police man in movies who blow up vehicles have those bullets. At least one of a pair of identical twins is born evil. If you need to open a locked door make sure you have a credit card handy, that will do. Unless its the door to a burning building with a child trapped inside. Most laptop computers are powerful enough to override the communication systems of any invading alien civilization. If a killer is lurking in your house, it's easy to find him. Just relax and run a bath - even if it's the middle of the afternoon. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TotalObelisk Posted May 22, 2007 Report Share Posted May 22, 2007 In a card game you're always likely to draw exactly what card you need no matter what the fans say (did anybody find Yugioh the movie a little TOO convinient?) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KKDW Posted May 22, 2007 Report Share Posted May 22, 2007 No matter how many times the actor changes' date=' James Bond will never provide any of his collegues with any explanation as to his new face.[/quote'] James Bond *IS* DOCTOR WHO!! ;) Whenever a villain says 'nothing can stop them now' they get stopped! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
happybunny gogoboots Posted May 22, 2007 Report Share Posted May 22, 2007 The good guys always win and the bad guys undefeatable plans are always defeated Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Weather Duelist Posted May 22, 2007 Report Share Posted May 22, 2007 When you need Law Enforcement, it can take hours to days to months for any help. However, if the Police ar ethe last people you want around, the entire precinct will be at yoru front door, or waiting for you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Slime Lord Posted May 23, 2007 Report Share Posted May 23, 2007 The good guys always win and the bad guys undefeatable plans are always defeated Congradu-freakin'-lations, you just spoiled every movie ever made. I hope you're happy. :cry: :) :lol: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SomeGuy Posted May 23, 2007 Report Share Posted May 23, 2007 Have you guys ever noticed that when the good guys get shot they always seem unharmed as if it had just been a spitball, but then when they're in the hospital and the nurses try to treat it they always shriek in pain....... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
yugiohmasta 444 Posted May 23, 2007 Report Share Posted May 23, 2007 nope never noticed thati think your completely making that up Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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