Guest Posted January 22, 2008 Report Share Posted January 22, 2008 Not bad, may i suggest making it paragraph format Ex: Blake walked into the place with the thing and put it down. He took a few steps back and said "Here i brought the thing". Its up 2 u if u want to use something like that Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zeppeli Gyro Supreme Posted January 25, 2008 Report Share Posted January 25, 2008 The duels go by pretty fast, and the card timings are way too great for me.. But all in all it's okay. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phantom Roxas Posted January 25, 2008 Author Report Share Posted January 25, 2008 Don't worry, I intend to have the duels go longer sooner or later Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phantom Roxas Posted February 1, 2008 Author Report Share Posted February 1, 2008 Okay, here’s Chapter 6. Sorry for the wait Chapter 6: The Threat Rises Blake and Derek ran to the arcade. Blake noticed Lily inside playing DDR SuperNOVA against another girl. Lily had won, so she got off the platform. The girl Lily played against left the arcade, but not before taking a quick glance at Blake. Lily called out, “Hey Blake, didn’t expect to see you here.” Derek went up to Blake and asked, slightly teasing, “So Blake, who’s this girl?” Blake turned to him, ignoring his tease, said, “This is Lily. I met her yesterday after I beat her brother in the finals. She’s also in the championship.” Derek raised his arms and put his arms behind his head. “So, looks like I’ll be facing you too in the finals.” “That depends if you can survive to then.” Blake, Derek, and Lily turned around to see who had spoke. It was a boy, around their age, wearing a long-sleeved black shirt and jeans. He had black mid-length hair that covered the upper-left side of his face.“I have come to dispose of the Chosen One.” The boy said as he activated his Duel Disk. Blake readied his as he said, “Who are you?”“My name is Silad. I serve the Sacred Beasts. I have been sent to defeat you to ensure that you will not stop their return. “ Both of them stood ready. The duel had begun. Silad went first. “I summon Revival Jam in Defense Mode. Now I’ll activate Card of Safe Return and The Dark Door. I’ll end my turn with a face-down.” Blake drew. A Jam Deck? This might be a problem. “I summon Elemental Hero Sparkman in Attack Mode(1600/1400) Attack his Revival Jam! (Revival Jam is destroyed) Silad spoke. “I activate my face-down card, Solemn Wishes. Now, every time I draw, I gain 500 Life Points. Now I’ll activate Revival Jam’s Special Abilty. By paying 1000 Life Points, I get my Jam back when my turn starts.” (Drops to 3000) Blake continued with his turn. “I’ll end my turn with a face-down.” Sidal drew. “Thanks to my Solemn Wishes, I gain 500 Life Points.” (Rises to 3500) “Now I get my Revival Jam back. And since I just got a monster back from my Graveyard, my Card of Safe Return allows me to draw again, which means I gain 500 Points.” (Rises to 4000) I’ll end my turn with three face-downs.” Blake drew. “Sweet! I play Polymerization, so now I can fuse my Sparkman with Clayman to summon Elemental Hero Thunder Giant!” (2400/1500) Sidal shouted, “Not so fast! I activate one of my face-down cards, Fusion Jam!” Suddenly, metallic jam came from below Thunder Giant, and completely swallowed it. “My Fusion Jam destroys your Fusion Monsters as soon as it’s summoned, and you take damage, equal to half of its Attack.” (Blake drops to 2800) Blake growled. “Alright then. I’ll activate O-Oversoul, so now I can get my Sparkman back. Now go, attack his Revival Jam.” (Revival Jam is destroyed) “Remember, if I pay 1000 Points, Revival Jam comes back next turn.” (Drops to 3000)“Fine, I’ll end with a face-down.” Sidal draws. “My Revival Jam comes back. And thanks to my Card of Safe Return and Solemn Wishes, I can draw again and I get 1000 more Life Points.” (Rises to 4000) “Now I activate my face-down card, Metal Reflect Slime. Now it becomes a monster that will provide with a great barrier!” (0/3000) “Then I’ll play Polymerization, fusing my Slime with my Jam to summon Metal Revival Jam!” (2000/3000). “This monster can’t be destroyed in battle, but I still take damage. However, I can easily fix that with this, Spirit Barrier. As long as this card is out, if I have a monster, I take no Battle Damage. Now, attack his Sparkman!” (Sparkman is destroyed, Blake drops to 2400) Blake pointed to his face-down card as it activated. “I activate Hero Signal, so now I can summon Elemental Hero Neos Alius.” Draws. “Now I’ll Second Summon Neos Alius, so now he’s just Neos. Then I’ll activate Common Soul, so now I can summon Neo-Spacian Flare Scarab. Go, Contact Fusion! Come on out, Elemental Hero Flare Neos!” (2500/2000). Thanks to his special ability, he gains 400 Attack for every Spell and Trap Card out, and I count three, so that’s 1200 Attack. Next I’ll play Neospace, so now Flare Neos gains 500 more points, and even more by his own effect.” (Flare Neos, 2500->4600) “I activate R-Righteous Justice. Sicne I have an Elemental Hero out, you lose one of your Spell or Trap cards, and I choose Spirit Barrier. Then I’ll activate Megamorph, so since my Life Points are lower than your’s, Flare Neos’ original Attack doubles, and he still gets 400 more Attack points! (Flare Neos, 4600->7100) “Finish him!” (Metal Revival Jam is destroyed. Sidal takes 5100 damage. Loses) As the holograms disappeared, Sidal suddenly disappeared into a puff of darkness. Another voice spoke."That was impressive." It was the girl who Lily had just beaten in DDR. The girl wore violet jeans a purple tank top, and a purple beret."Hello. My name is Skye." Meanwhile, in the dark area where the three torches stood, Sidal appeared. The mysterious spoke."Sidal, you have failed, as expected. Uria, you may have the first offering."Uria, happy that he would get the meal, sent flames out of himself, engulfing Sidal in the fire. The torch that Uria was lit on was now empty, Sidal now stood up, but was clearly differenet. Sidal had a red jacket, and his hair was red, with a few black beads in his hair. The voice spoke."So, Uria. How do you like your new body?""It feels great. Now to dispose of the Chosen one and that wretched Skye." 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DMGirl44 Posted February 1, 2008 Report Share Posted February 1, 2008 this is so cool! it's one of the best things i've ever read! -^_^- Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phantom Roxas Posted February 7, 2008 Author Report Share Posted February 7, 2008 Sorry for any confusion. I decided to combine Chapters 5-7 into just Chapter 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phantom Roxas Posted February 9, 2008 Author Report Share Posted February 9, 2008 Chapter 7: Playing With Fire The girl, Skye, who had suddenly appeared before Blake, Derek, and Lily, approached. Lily said to her, "Hey, you're the girl from the arcade." Skye replied, "Yes, and I have come for you, Blake." Blake, walked up to her and asked, "Are you with Nephilis or that guy I just dueled?" Skye giggled and shook her head. "No. I have no allegiance to the Rainbow Guardians or the Sacred Beasts. Come, I must show you something."The trio followed her, but she didn't speak or even turn to them as the walked. At the time, Blake and Derek told Lily about Nephilis, so she would understand what was going on, even though neither of the boys fully understood themselves. After about an hour, they were in the middle of a forest. Their were two tall trees parallel to each other. Between them, hundreds of leaves and branches were piled together, as if concealing something. Skye finally turned around to them. However, before she could even begin, a voice called out. "You really aren't going show them the temple now aren't you, dear Skye?" Blake, Derek, Lily, and even Skye were surprised. The voice sounded like Silad, though he talked with much more intelligence and a raspy voice. But this didn't seem to be the reason behind Skye's surprise. She turned around, and the others looked in the same direction. On top of a tree, they saw Sidal, but much more different. Skye shouted, "Uria! What are you doing here? And how are you here?" Uria jumped from the tree and landed on his feet. "Don't think I have come for you, yet. I am here for the Chosen One." Blake went forward, "I'm guessing that means me." Skye looked over her shoulder. "Don't worry, I'll take care of this." Uria shook his head. "No, I wish to duel the Heir." Blake readied his Duel Disk. "Bring it." Fire lit around Uria's arm until a red Duel Disk appeared, with a mysterious dragon head on it. Blake started. "I summon Elemental Hero Stratos, and thanks to his Special Ability, I can add Elemental Hero Ocean from my deck to my hand. Then I'll set two cards face-down." Uria drew his card. "I activate Blaze Accelerator. Thanks to this card, if I send my Volcanic Shell to the graveyard, I can destroy one of your monsters, but I can't attack this turn. Now say goodbye to Stratos!" (Stratos is destroyed) "Next, I'll summon Volcanic Slicer." (1800/1200) "Thanks to this card, you take 500 damage. But just like my Blaze Accelerator, he can't attack if he does this." (Blake drops to 3500) "I'll end with a face-down" Derek gasped, "This is bad. Blake's gotta take care of this guy quick!" Skye shook her head. "No. Despite his human appearance, Uria is a Sacred Beast. Not even Blake defeat him now." Lily turned to her. "Is there anything we can do?" Skye shook her head again. Blake drew. "Summon Elemental Hero Ocean, and then I'll activate H-Heated Heart, so now he gains 500 Attack Points. Next, I'll activate R-Righteous Justice, so you're Blaze Accelerator is destroyed. Now, Attack his Slicer!" (Volcanic Slicer is destroyed, Uria drops to 3900. Ocean returns to 1500) Uria shrugged. "Didn't even make a scratch. My turn. I summon Volcanic Rocket. Now, Blaze Accelerator returns to my hand. Then I'll activate it. Now I play Volcanic Combustion, so now, by tributing my Rocket, I can summon Volcanic Blaster in Defense Mode." (1200/600) Next, I'll upgrade to Blaze Accelerator to Tri-Blaze Accelerator. Now I'll use my Volcanic Shell's effect to add another Shell to my hand. Then I'll send it into my Accelerator to destroy your Hero!" (E-Hero Ocean is destroyed, Blake drops to 3000) "By the way, when I destroy a monster with Tri-Blaze Accelerator, you take 500 damage. Finally, I'll set two cards-face-down." Blake drew. "I summon Elemental Hero Sparkman and equip him with Spark Blaster and use it to switch your Blaster into Attack Mode. Now, attack his monster." (Volcanic Blaster is destroyed, Uria drops to 3500) Uria laughed. "Thanks to my Blaster's effect, I can add my Volcanic Doomfire to my hand.""Then I'll use Spark Blaster to switch Sparkman back to Defense Mode. Now I'll end my turn." Uria drew his card. "I activate my face-down cards, Final Attack Orders and Light of Intervention. Then I'll ditch my Tri-Blaze Accelerator in order to summon Volcanic Doomfire!" (3000/1800) "Go, destroy his Sparkman." (Sparkman is destroyed)"Hang on! Since you destroyed my monster in battle, I can finally activate this, Hero Signal. Now I can summon Elemental Hero Neos Alius." "Fine then. I'll end with a face-down." Blake drew. "I activate Graceful Charity, so now I can draw three cards, but then I have to discard two cards. Now I'll Second Summon Elemental Hero Neos Alius, so now he's treated as the original Neos. Next I activate Miracle Contact, so now I'll return Neos Alius with Neo-Spacians Flare Scarab and Grand Mole that I discarded with Graceful Charity. Thanks to this, I can summon Elemental Hero Magma Neos!" (3000/2500) "And thanks to his Special Ability, he gains 400 Attack for every card on the field, and since their are 5 cards on the field, he gains 2400 Attack." (Magma Neos, 3000-> 5000) "Go! attack his Volcanic Doomfire!" (Volcanic Doomfire is destroyed, Uria drops to 1500) "Next, I'll play Contact Out, so Magma Neos goes back to my deck, but I get Neos, Flare Scarab, and Ground Mole back!" (Elemental Hero Neos in Attack Mode, 2500/2000, Neo-Spacian Flare Scarab in Defense Mode, 500/500, and Neo-Spacian Ground Mole in Defense Mode, 900/300) "Now Neos attacks you directly!" "You're not winning yet!" Uria shouted, "I activate Metal Reflect Slime!" (0/3000) The silver slime appeared, much to Blake's annoyance for having to deal with it again. Blake shrugged. "I'll end my turn." Uria drew his card, and laughed as he stared at it. "Chosen One, you think you can defeat us? Behold, my true form!" Suddenly, Metal Reflect Slime, Firewall, Solemn Wishes, and even Uria himself all set on fire. The fire grew larger until nothing within it was visible. When it finally cleared, a large dragon stood where Uria had been, it's face looking exactly like the dragon that shaped his Duel Disk . Uria's voice could be heard, as if the dragon itself spoke. "This is my true form: Uria, Lord of Searing Flames! I needed to get my three trap cards out, as that is the only way for me to be summoned.""Blake, run! There's no way you can defeat his true form!" Skye shouted.Blake shook his head. "Skye, I don't know who you are, or why I have to save the world, but if I just ran, there will be no world to save." Uria called back. "I don't think so! I gain 1000 Attack for every Continuous Trap in my graveyard, including the ones needed to summon me!" (Uria's Attack rises to 3000) "Then I'll activate my face-down card, Shadow Spell! Thanks to this, your Neos loses 700 Attack!" (Neos drops to 1800) "Die, Neos!" (Neos is destroyed, Blake drops to 1800, Uria rises to 4000 ATK) "Since my Shadow Spell was a Continuous Trap, I gain 1000 more Attack." Blake looked at his face-down card. Edge Hammer. I have Bladedge in my hand. I can summon him and then I'll win. Uria chuckled, "Thinking about using your face-down card? Well, too bad. You see, every turn, I can destroy a face-down card and nothing can stop me from it." Blake's face-down Edge Hammer is destroyed. Uria raised it's head in laughter, preparing to defeat Blake. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shadow Dude64 Posted February 18, 2008 Report Share Posted February 18, 2008 7/10 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Umbra Posted March 20, 2008 Report Share Posted March 20, 2008 The story's going on well, but sometimes, it's like trying to read a brick. The Enter button is your friend. And what happened to the characters I sent in, like two months ago? I haven't seen any of them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phantom Roxas Posted April 7, 2008 Author Report Share Posted April 7, 2008 Well, I'm thinking about restarting this fanfic. I'll get them in then. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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