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The Diaries of TheAlpha

TheAlpha

By TheAlpha
in Creative Writing

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TheAlpha Newbie

TheAlpha

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Sorry, but since my diary has been burned, there will be no more entries.

 

Entry 1[spoiler=Perfect...]I've been called ugly. I've been called a beast. I've been called a monkey. I've even been called the infamous "El Chupacabra". And in the face of all the verbal abuses, all I can find myself doing is smiling and walking away. Of course it hurts inside but what can I do? I've never been the type to come with a snappy comeback and I'm afraid of violence. So, I smile. Why? To tell you the the truth, I really don't have an answer for that. Maybe when they see me smile after a hammer of abuses, they''ll take pity on me or think I'm pathetic and leave me alone... About sixty percent of the time, it doesn't work. I don't complain because I'm to busy thanking god or whatever is up there for the forty percent who see me as "not worth it". My mom and dad have always said that I was handsome. Even my aunt constantly calls me her, "Sexy Chocolaty Young Man". And at one time, I had actually believed them. They gave me a new found confidence. I kept telling myself that maybe I was just exaggerating and my mind, for some reason, was denying my own beauty. But then the world sent me crashing back down to the surface of reality. I was so devastated that I almost committed suicide. But thankfully, I counseled myself into a new direction. I vowed to myself that I would strive to become perfect.

Being beautiful and perfect mean a lot to me. I guess you can say that the years of "oral torture" sent me down this road. And to be honest, I thank them for their abuse. Every time someone decides to "make my day" and give me the feeling of not wanting to exist, I comeback with power and an even stronger strive towards perfection. I constantly work on my hair, my looks, my clothes, and my personality to achieve these life-term goals. I know a lot of you guys think that the concept of perfect doesn't exist and ironically, I agree with you.

I remember just last year, my Career Connections teacher, Ms. Notherrealname was lecturing to us about life-term goals. She said something that astonished me. She said that life-term goals in a way can never truly be achieved until you die. She explained that life-term goals are things that you pursuit until the end of your life.

For example, if a man or women wants to run a a successful business, they'd have to go through the necessary mandatories to create it. Then they would constantly have to make sure there business stays afloat by dealing with financial problems, customers, and etc. And when they die, people would remember them as someone who ran something successful.

I believe that I'll never be able to reach perfection. But I also believe that if I can't reach it, I'll get as close to it as possible until I die. But before I die, I will look back at those who made feel like I was a mistake. Not to look down on them but to send them a message. A message that not even I know the contents of.

 

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-Athena- Newbie

-Athena-

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Wow, the idea of the writing is deep. I love it. Thanks for giving me the site, reading it was worth my time.

 

Keep setting goals and you'll be successful. Ignore those other people. One day, you'll have a business company and they might come to your company begging to work there :).

 

-Athena :)

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Spikeball Newbie

Spikeball

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O.O You see - I dont know why but I love to read it since it's that affecting - and that is something rare for me to say, ya know? I'm not the one who is usually stuck to reading matters - I'm more kinda graphic ..guy^^

 

Is this really your very own story? *respect* - You're very brave to show your life to everyone in this forum (and so to everyone in the internet), I'd never do this.

I personally also have some kinda life-term goal: When it's my time to die I want to be happy and pleased with my life^^

 

I hope there will be more - You got some writing skills I want you to keep using^^

 

*thunbs-up*

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Urai Fen Newbie

Urai Fen

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Almost made me cry... not really, but you're pretty good at writing. I do have to agree though, it is a bit ludacrous to put your diary on a yugioh card maker forum. I also sort of take the verbal abuse, and smile almost stupidly, but that isn't any reason to believe that you must attempt the impossible of reaching utter perfection. I hate to be a downer and all, but you will not reach humanly-perfect status; perfection is like infinite, so by trying to be nearly perfect is like trying to count to the number before infinite, it simply cant be done.

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Altαir Newbie

Altαir

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Amazing job, and very deep. It was very brave of you to start this, and I truly hope you continue your work.

 

"There are those who strive for success even when it appears too far to reach, and others would have given up. This, by itself, is success in the highest state."

 

Perfection may be too far, and nearly impossible, but it's those who continue to hold on, no matter what others may say or do, which have achieved success itself.

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