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Green With Envy: Crab Helmet's Foe Fiction! {Rise of the Dragon Lords}

CrabHelmet

By CrabHelmet
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Grunt Issun Newbie

Grunt Issun

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Yep, so just suck it up, and dont read the review...no I'm joking, read every heart peircing shred.

 

 

anyway, on a random note, pokemon have the best dialouge ever

for example (this is fake)

 

Ash: besides pikachu wants to keep fighting right pikachu?

Pikachu: Pii piikaa *shakes head*

Ash: Pikachu says yes

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Headmaster Monokuma Newbie

Headmaster Monokuma

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You're the n00b. At least I can do better' date=' unlike you. You will never change. Treating people like crap. You have no respect for anybody's s**t.

[/quote']

 

And you are too quick to anger. When you act like that, you're the one acting like a noob. This is what happens when you refuse to accept criticism. There is nothing you can do.

 

Crab, you've been doing a wonderful job, and I hope to see more over time.

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CrabHelmet Newbie

CrabHelmet

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Sorry for the long delay. I'm back now.

 

[spoiler=The 36 Stratagems - {Yugioh O5D'S}]Our next subject is Yugioh O5D'S by Delinquent Girl NiAtSoFi.

 

Having returned from my unnecessarily long absence from my studio, I am now ready to continue my noble work of decidedly not reading Chapter Characters. Let's jump straight to Chapter Duel 1.

 

Duel 1: Rin

Duel 1: Rin

 

Well, thanks for clearing that up.

 

Duel Monsters world...

 

I'm not losing any formatting in transition here; the announcement of the setting is a perfectly ordinary line formatted exactly like the rest of the story, even though it's clearly not a sentence.

 

"You have no hope. Despair will come,

 

I thought a lack of hope implied that despair had already come.

 

and Diabolos will send you to Hell with the research team!"

 

I'm sorry, I don't usually laugh out loud while reading these, but this line made me chuckle quietly to myself. Something about this string of generic doom words - "no hope", "despair", "Diabolos", "Hell" - being followed by a reference to a "research team" amuses me. The phrase "research team" has the power to turn any vaguely threatening statement into a joke.

 

Rin's LP: 1900

Anchuu's LP: 2200

 

Diabolos, King of the Abyss (2800/1000) towers over Rin, so as to stalk its prey.

 

Why do you people always write fanfics in the present tense? No, seriously, why? I don't understand it at all.

 

Anyhow, what's all this about stalking prey? It's a monster Summoned in a duel. Its "prey" is standing directly across from it, making no attempt to hide or escape. And it's not stalking it; it's standing still in its Monster Card Zone, and it's towering, which makes it clearly visible. When I stalk people, I make sure to hide in the shadows and not be see- wait, no!

 

[PLEASE STAND BY - TECHNICAL DIFFICULTIES]

 

Spirit Reaper sits on Anchuu's field in Defense Position. Rin stares at the dragon, drawing her next card. "This turn, you die. I discard Dandylion to Special Summon Quickdraw Synchron (700/1400). Dandy's effect activates. It Special Summons 2 Fluff Tokens in Defense Position. I tune my 2 Level 1 Fluff Tokens with my Level 5 Quickdraw..."

 

Rin is apparently a modern meta duelist from our world.

 

Rings of green light surround Sangan,

 

Wait, who? Sangan? What?

 

Hell, I don't even know what a Sangan is either.

 

No, I know what a Sangan is. I mean that Sangan isn't supposed to be here. He was never mentioned before. The Synchro Material Monsters are Quickdraw and the Fluff Tokens; no Sangan is involved. And if he were involved, the Level would be wrong.

 

Look, when I tell you people to run your stories through the MSWord spellchecker, I'm not saying that that's all you need to do. I'm just saying that that's a starting point; it's not a substitute for actual proofreading. And there's no way you can possibly read this and not notice something like the wrong monster suddenly being mentioned out of nowhere.

 

stars cluster together, becoming a new monster, a Synchro Monster. "I Synchro Summon Nitro Warrior." Nitro Warrior (2800/1800) appears, it’s large, green muscular form forcing Diabolos to back away "Next,

 

Proofreading would also probably enable you to catch problems like the missing full-stop after "away" and the it's/its error. I can understand not wanting to read this story, since I don't want to read it either, but if even you, its author, don't want to read it, why would you expect the internet to want to read it?

 

I'll activate Pot of Avarice. I select 5 monsters from my Graveyard, shuffle them into my deck, and then draw 2 cards." Rin shuffles Caius, Quickdraw, Dandy, Speed Warrior, and Ryko into her deck, and then draws 2 cards.

 

Look at that list of monsters. This is deck is extremely modern and not even remotely anime-style...

 

"Now, I'll attack Diabolos with Nitro..." Nitro Warrior charges at Diabolos.

 

"Both monsters have 2800 attack. You're just wasting your time. I'm going to kill you anyway..." Anchuu scoffs.

 

"During a turn, in which I activate a Spell Card, Nitro Warrior gains 1000 attack during its next attack." Rin tells Anchuu. Thus, Nitro Warrior's attack rises to 3800, destroying Diabolos. Anchuu's life points drop to 1200.

 

...but people in this universe still don't read card effects during duels for some reason, just like in the anime...

 

"I'm not done. When Nitro Warrior destroys a monster by battle, I can switch one of your face-up Defense Position monsters to Attack Position, and attack it with Nitro." Spirit Reaper switches to Attack Position (ATK 300), and Nitro Warrior attacks it, Anchuu's life points dropping to 0.

 

...and neither did the author, apparently, since Spirit Reaper's self-destruct effect - which should have activated and killed it as soon as it was changed to Attack Position, preventing the killing attack - seems to have been forgotten.

 

Anchuu's body turns to black dust, leaving behind the Diabolos card. Rin picks it up, and sits down. The wind blows away Anchuu's remains.

 

Alas, poor Yorick! I knew him, Horatio; a fellow of infinite jest, of most excellent fancy. Actually, I just made that up. The author didn't think it was necessary to give us the slightest bit of description of either Anchuu or Rin. For all I know, Anchuu could be that horribly mutilated version of Anten that Pichu uses in his Not Actually Reviews. As such, we now have a case where the one-shot minor villain's disintegrated remains receive more description than the protagonist of the story.

 

And the only description they receive is "BLACK DUST", so that's saying something. The only thing we know about Rin is that she's female, and even that we wouldn't know if it weren't for the way English's third-person pronouns vary with gender.

 

Rin looks at the cards left behind other Generals. Ocean Dragon Lord-Neo Daedalus, Vampire Genesis, Red-Eyes Darkness Dragon, Caius the Dark Monarch, Machina Fortress, and now, Diabolos, King of the Abyss. "Just 13 to go..." Rin says to herself.

 

Thirteen more!? Look, everyone hates it when professional shows pad things out with endless filler villains and collecting innumerable trinkets, and they only do it because they get paid for it. You're receiving no money for this, so why on earth would you waste everyone's time with this ridiculous padding and thus drive off the few readers you might have?

 

I can't even think of any anime villains who had thirteen named henchmen. When your story has more filler than the actual anime, something is extremely wrong. In fact, when your story has filler, something is extremely wrong.

 

The next day. New Domino City's Duel Academy...

 

Today is the first day of classes.

 

So much of this story was just Rin narrating her moves that I'd actually forgotten this story was doing that stupid present-tense thing for absolutely no reason. Why does YCM think that's the best way to write? Has nobody here read a book!?

 

The academy is a large place.

 

QUALITY

 

Rin is already lost, and end up at a duel arena.

 

PROOFREADING

 

A duel has just ended. A bulky, larger student towers over a smaller student.

 

The bulky student is clearly towering over the smaller student because he's stalking him.

 

Incidentally, BULKY and SMALLER are still more description than Rin and her Anchuu adversary ever received.

 

"You know the deal pay up. $300! Now!"

 

The smaller student clings to his money "please. My mom will be mad at me."

 

"Shut up and hand it over."

 

The smaller student hands over the money. "NEXT!" The larger student yells.

 

"HEY FATASS! I'LL PLAY FOR $600!" Rin yells from the stands.

 

The intended effect here is obvious: Bulkyguy is supposed to be a bully, Smallerguy is his poor victim, and Rin is the hero who swoops in to defeat the bully and save the poor victim. But that's not how this scene looks to me at all.

 

From what we've seen - which, bear in mind, is also what Rin has seen - Bulkyguy beat Smallerguy in a duel and then took the $300 (not yen? Aren't we in Japan?) that had been wagered, as per their agreement. So, Bulkyguy's crime here is, uh, making Smallerguy hold up his end of the deal they made and actually pay the money he wagered. Sure, Smallerguy doesn't want to pay because his mother will be mad, but maybe he shouldn't have wagered three hundred dollars that he wasn't prepared to lose. And this is in plain sight in the middle of an official Academy duel arena; it's not like Smallerguy was ambushed by a bunch of Steves in a dark alleyway and forced into this illegal underground duel that he wanted to avoid.

 

But we all know Big Guy = Evil and Small Guy = Good, so we're supposed to sympathize with Smallerguy anyhow.

 

"Fatass? COME DOWN HERE AND SAY THAT MY FACE!" The large student shouts.

 

The duel ring is set up. "I'll teach you some respect, freshman! No one insults Masaru the Titan!"

 

And we're supposed to support Rin for randomly insulting Bulkyguy, who she never saw do any wrong, and oppose Bulkyguy for, uh, being offended when someone comes out of nowhere and randomly insults him.

 

Based on how accurate the author's moral compass has been so far, maybe Anchuu was a good guy too.

 

Rin's LP: 8000

Masaru's LP: 8000

 

Ah, that's right. We've got more realistic duels here, so a full 8000 LP are used.

 

It's Masaru's turn. "I'll set a monster and a card. Your turn."

 

It's Rin's turn. "Since you control a monster, and I don't, I can Special Summon Cyber Dragon from my hand" Cyber Dragon appears in its serpent-like glory (2100/1600.) "Next, I'll summon Machina Gearframe" (1800/0) "Gearframe allows me to add 1 Machina from my deck to my hand" Rin searches her deck and chooses Machina Fortress. "I'll attack your face-down monster with Cyber Dragon." Cyber Dragon fires it laser breath at the face-down monster. It flips face-up, revealing itself to be Stone Statue of the Aztecs (300/2000). Stone Statue is destroyed.

 

"Moron. I'll use my Trap. Broken Blocker! When one of my monsters who's defense is higher that it's attack is killed in battle, I can Special Summon 2 monsters with the same name from my deck" Thus, two Stone Statues are Special Summoned in face-up Defense Position.

 

Just like the last duel, boring stuff happens, full-stops are missing, and it's/its errors are made.

 

Rin looks at her hand. "I'll equip Gearframe to Cydra, and set a card. Your turn."

 

It's Masaru's turn. "I'll play Card Destruction. We discard our hands, then draw cards equal to the cards we discarded." Masaru discards his hand, then draws 4 cards. Rin discards her hand, then draws 3 cards.

 

Thanks for stating the numbers of cards in as many sentences as possible. It probably wasn't even necessary to state the numbers, since any idiot who passed first grade arithmetic could tell you how many cards were in each of their han- what's this?

 

Rin started her turn with six cards. She played two of them, then used one of the played cards to add a new card to her hand, then set one card. That makes four. According to my calculations, four is not equal to three.

 

"Since my field only has Defense Position monsters, I can Special Summon Backup Warrior" (2100/0) The heavily-armed soldier jumps from behind one of the Stone Statues. "Next, I'll equip Backup Warrior with United We Stand. He gets 800 ATK and DEF for each monster I control" (4500/2400.) "Backup Warrior! Mow down her Cyber Dragon! Bullet Hell!" Backup Warrior attacks Cyber Dragon. Gearframe, equipped to Cyber Dragon with it's own effect, is destroyed instead.

 

Rin's LP: 4600

 

4500-2100=2400 damage dealt.

 

8000-4600=3400 damage taken.

 

Even the author is too bored with this duel to bother having the slightest idea what's going on in it.

 

"No one can beat my Backup Combo! Your turn!" Masaru ends his turn.

 

Rin: "Maybe that's because you're cheating?"

Masaru: "Shhh!"

 

Rin draws. "I summon Black Gadget" (1600/800) "When Black Gadget is summoned, I can Special Summon a Gadget monster from my hand. So, I Special Summon Pink Gadget" (1500/1000) "When Pink Gadget is summoned, I can add 1 Gadget monster from my Deck to my hand."

 

You can't have people running reality-style Quickdraw decks and then give them broken original cards like Pink Gadget.

 

Rin searches her deck, and selects Blue Gadget. "I play Double Summon. During this turn, I can Normal Summon 1 extra time. I summon Blue Gadget" (500/400).

 

Laughter erupts from Masaru's group.

 

Since when does Masaru have a group? Nothing of the sort was even mentioned before! Is this a joke?

 

"Is this a joke?" Masaru scoffs.

 

It's official. Masaru is the most sympathetic character in this story.

 

"Sure it is. Here's the punchline" Rin continues. "I tune my Level 4 Black Gadget with my Level 4 Pink Gadget" Green rings of light surround Black Gadget. "I Synchro Summon Gadjiltron Giant" (2500/2000) A large, white robot towers over Backup Warrior. "When Giant is Synchro Summoned, I can add 2 Gadgets from my Deck to my hand." Rin selects Red Gadget and Yellow Gadget from her deck. "Next, I activate Machine Duplication. By selecting 1 Machine-type monster I control with 500 or less attack, I can Special Summon 2 copies of that monster from my Deck. I select Blue Gadget." Two Blue Gadgets are Special Summoned to the field. "I tune my Level 8 Gadjiltron Giant with my Level 2 Blue Gadget" Green rings of light surround Gadjiltron Giant. "I Synchro Summon Gadjiltron Lion" (3000/2400.) Gadjiltron Lion's roar causes Backup Warrior to back away. "I tune my Level 10 Gadjiltron Lion with my Level 2 Blue Gadget" Green rings surround Gadjiltron Lion. "Synchro Summon! Gadjiltron Galaxy!" (3300/3000.) A giant, gear covered spaceship hovers over the field.

 

"HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! You wasted all your cards to summon...THAT?" Masaru laughs.

 

Why exactly would anyone laugh at the opponent pulling out a 3300/3000 Level 12 giant spaceship?

 

"I use Galaxy's effect. Once per turn, I can Special Summon 1 Machine-type monster from my Graveyard. I'll Special Summon Gadjiltron Giant." Gadjiltron Giant returns to the field. "Next, I play Call of the Haunted

 

You can't; you're out of cards. You can't possibly have a Call of the Haunted available.

 

Disregard that; I forgot to count the card Rin drew at the start of her turn. I blame the story for putting me to sleep.

 

to Special Summon Gadjiltron Lion" Gadjiltron Lion returns to the field with a loud roar. "Finally, I'll discard my Red and Yellow Gadgets to Special Summon Machina Fortress" (2500/1600.) "While Giant is on the field, all my Machine-type monsters get 200 ATK for every Gadget in my Graveyard. All of Rin's monsters get an ATK bonus...

 

Gadgets in Graveyard: 8 (+1600 ATK)

Blue Gadget x3

Pink Gadget

Black Gadget

Red Gadget

Yellow Gadget

Green Gadget (discarded by Card Destruction)

 

Gadjiltron Galaxy (ATK 3300-->4900)

Gadjiltron Lion (ATK 3000-->4600)

Gadjiltron Giant (ATK 2500-->4100)

Machina Fortress (ATK 2500-->4100)

Cyber Dragon (ATK 2100-->3700)

 

"No way! You gotta be cheating!" Masaru shouts in disbelief.

 

"No cheating here.

 

There's nothing but cheating here.

 

At least this was a bit more interesting than the first duel - and I know why that's the case.

 

Everyone, myself not excepted, makes fun of anime characters for their terrible decks that are fueled by the power of the author stacking the deck. But that's what makes the anime almost watchable. Real duels are less interesting to watch, and if I did want to watch one, I'd watch a real duel; I wouldn't bother reading a story someone wrote that attempts to simulate a real duel.

 

Besides, having the main character run a real-life meta deck raises all sorts of issues. If the main character uses modern meta decks, why do others use nonsense like Stone Statue of the Aztecs and Diabolos? Is the protagonist the only one who can afford cards like Quickdraw Synchron, and thus wins by virtue of being the richest? Is every single other person in the universe too stupid to make a deck that real-life ten-year-olds can construct? Do the others benefit from some sort of Heart of the Cards advantage that makes their non-meta decks work? And if so, does the protagonist do so as well, and thus win because a stacked meta deck beats a stacked bad deck? Or is the protagonist too evil to benefit from the Heart of the Cards, and thus needs to make up for it with actual decent decks? Given how terrible the meta generally is, why does anyone play such a broken game?

 

In the end, fanfic duels really have to exist for the spectacle. What we really need to see is not nerds running generic realistic decks but people like Dan Green pulling off ridiculous but flashy combos and hamming it up.

 

I mean, fanfic duels are always boring, but at least showy ones are somewhat less so.

 

Cyber Dragon destroys your Stone Statue. Cyber Dragon incinerates Stone Statue. "Machina Fortress destroys your second Statue" Fortress blows the second Statue apart. Backup Warrior's ATK drops to 2900. "Galaxy destroys your Backup Warrior." Galaxy's laser slices Backup Warrior apart.

 

Masaru's LP: 6000

 

"Gadjiltron Lion and Giant attack you directly!"

 

Masaru's LP: 0

 

There were approximately three paragraphs of content in this chapter that weren't just people announcing their moves in card games. Compare that to the overall length of this chapter - I got too disinterested to even comment properly on a lot of the dueling stuff, since there's not much to say - and you'll see that something is very wrong here.

 

Masaru is traumatized.

 

Rin is the sort of protagonist who traumatizes random people.

 

"Pay up" Rin orders.

 

Hold it! We established earlier that forcing people to pay up what they wagered is somehow morally wrong!

 

Two students, a boy and a girl, watch from afar. "She'll make a great member, yes?" The girl asks...

 

And so we come to this chapter's end to find a twist ending. No, I'm not talking about these two random we saw people saying vague things. I'm talking about what we surprisingly didn't see. We've all seen this scene a thousand times in all sorts of stories - including very frequently in the Yu-Gi-Oh! anime itself. And we all know how it's supposed to work:

 

The Hero comes across The Bully and The Victim. The Bully beats The Victim - either in a competition or physically with fists - and takes The Stuff. The Hero challenges The Bully for The Stuff, wins, and returns The Stuff to The Victim.

 

It's always the same old song. That's how it always plays out.

 

But that's not what happens here. Rin never gives $300 back to Smallerguy - she keeps the whole $600 for herself. She didn't do this out of any sense of honour or duty or anything of the sort - she saw some innocent kid she thought she could beat, taunted him to get him to duel her, and then took his money, just because she could.

 

1-721492.jpg

 

Not pictured: Smallerguy.

 

And it's not like she returns the money at the start of Chapter Duel 2 either. I peeked ahead, just to make sure. Duel 2 opens after a brief time skip in a completely different scene, with Smallerguy nowhere in sight.

 

This is our protagonist. And this confirms what I suspected before: our protagonist is a git.

 

What a lovely note on which to wrap up the review.

 

The complete lack of description of anything was certainly the author not having a clue how to write, but I did start to wonder whether the author had described the characters in Chapter Duel Characters and expected us to read that nonsense before turning to the actual story, so I went out of my way to actually check out that section to see if the author actually had a brilliant description too awesome to be contained in the actual story. Here's what I found:

 

Name: Rin

Age: 15

Gender: Female

Appearance: Beautiful, black hair, pigtails, Asian

Background: Daughter of scientists investigating the duel monster's world. She is the target of Dead Structure. A member of Club Underdog.

Personality: Introvert, smug, rude

Deck(s): Machina Gadgets, QuickdrawDandyWarriorMonarchs, Fog Village, Flamvell Zombies, Max City

 

This is the entire entry on our protagonist; I didn't omit anything. You know how I make fun of stories by saying that their descriptions of characters amount to BLACK HAIR and BULKY and stuff like that? I don't even need to do that here; that's actually what the author explicitly does - list a tiny number of one-word traits and count that as a description. And Rin's is the longest entry there. Anchuu's full appearance and personality description simply says that he's emo. I wish I were making this up.

 

What's worse is that the description contradicts what little we've actually seen on-screen. Rin is described as an "introvert", but the way she challenged Masaru sure doesn't show it. How can you have a description this bankrupt of content and still fail to follow it properly?

 

The only half-decent quality here was that you succeeded in using MSWord's spellchecker. Beyond that, this was bad in virtually every way. The proofreading, if it existed, was a failure; the short-term story, consisting solely of a couple of dull card games, was a failure; the long-term story, relying on thirteen padding villains, promises to be a failure; and the description was a failure of existence.

 

 

 

After the epically awful C-4 Bomb Scan, this was really boring to review in its more mundane terribleness.

 

do you think he/she would ever surgarcoat anything?

 

I sugarcoated the review of that terrible Bleach mega-crossover thing' date=' mainly because I was tired and feeling generous for some reason. I shall work to ensure that the mistake is not repeated.

 

I think many people can take offense to Crab making fun of their work.

 

The forum's rules say that anything posted here must be open to criticism, and common sense says that you don't post something for the world to see unless you want to be judged. I'm actually being generous in giving people an option to opt out by reviewing only stories that explicitly welcome comments or those where I have the author's permission to give my opinion.

 

You're the n00b. At least I can do better' date=' unlike you. You will never change. Treating people like crap. You have no respect for anybody's s**t.

[/quote']

 

Indeed. You are a reviewer, where as I am merely a reviewer. That obviously makes me inferior.

 

Incidentally, sir, I don't respect your "s**t" because it is, as you say, "s**t". Try posting something that isn't "s**t".

 

Since Blazinghydra seems to be taking the opposite stance, I'd just like to take this opportunity to clarify why I think the C-4 Bomb Scan was inferior even to Pichu's nonsense. Pichu is a moron and the stuff he claims to have written himself cannot reasonably be called a review, but that means that, while his monkey antics have no positive effect whatsoever, they also don't particularly hurt anything; nobody will get bad advice from them. double_c4's review had equally few positive qualities, but it also came equipped with many negative qualities, giving all sorts of bad advice, like demanding a Chapter Characters, advising the removal of Birdo due to obscurity, and acting like a wall of exposition needed to be dropped as soon as anything ever happened. For all his faults, I can't say that Pichu could ever make anyone write worse. double_c4 can't even reach that level of quality.

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CrabHelmet Newbie

CrabHelmet

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I didn't feel like there was any problem with using modern decks in dueling. I liked that realistic quality.

 

It can work decently, though it's not my cup of tea... but it doesn't work at all if you're only having one player use modern decks and you're still using all sorts of anime elements like people not reading cards.

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GenzoTheHarpist Newbie

GenzoTheHarpist

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I didn't feel like there was any problem with using modern decks in dueling. I liked that realistic quality.

 

It can work decently' date=' though it's not my cup of tea... but it doesn't work at all if you're only having one player use modern decks and you're still using all sorts of anime elements like people not reading cards.

[/quote']

 

lol... I remember back in 2008 (TeleDAD format) getting pissed off, I thought of writing a fic where some meta duelist from real life goes into yugioh the original series and beats everyone.

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CrabHelmet Newbie

CrabHelmet

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Even if you did have everyone use meta decks and got rid of things like not reading the cards, there are still problems. The terrible state the meta is usually in leads to the game being so broken that one wonders why everyone in the world would be so obsessed with the game, so you'd need to change the tone completely and make it Hikaru No Go-style or something.

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CrabHelmet Newbie

CrabHelmet

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Good review' date=' as always.

 

As for the thirteen named villain sub-ordinates, Bleach has had far more than that. Just saying.

[/quote']

 

I was referring specifically to the Yu-Gi-Oh! anime and its spinoffs , rather than to all anime, but based on that wall of characters I'd never heard of from the Bleach Crossover story, I wouldn't be surprised if half of Bleach's villainous teams numbered over thirteen.

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GenzoTheHarpist Newbie

GenzoTheHarpist

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Even if you did have everyone use meta decks and got rid of things like not reading the cards' date=' there are still problems. The terrible state the meta is usually in leads to the game being so broken that one wonders why everyone in the world would be so obsessed with the game, so you'd need to change the tone completely and make it Hikaru No Go-style or something.

[/quote']

 

Usually people's original cards are a lot more broken than anything konami released... like that OTK dragon in "the duel" for instance, or that burn deck w/ 4000 LP.

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CrabHelmet Newbie

CrabHelmet

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Even if you did have everyone use meta decks and got rid of things like not reading the cards' date=' there are still problems. The terrible state the meta is usually in leads to the game being so broken that one wonders why everyone in the world would be so obsessed with the game, so you'd need to change the tone completely and make it Hikaru No Go-style or something.

[/quote']

 

Usually people's original cards are a lot more broken than anything konami released... like that OTK dragon in "the duel" for instance, or that burn deck w/ 4000 LP.

 

True, but first of all, that's just bad design, and second of all, brokenness is more forgivable when the game is being run for the spectacle. Balance in a spectacle duel is like logic in a Super Robot series: not terribly important.

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