Blacklotis Posted May 3, 2010 Report Share Posted May 3, 2010 Well hello everyone. I have been reading Fanfics on here lately and got the buzz to start my own. This is based in America and the Main Character is Grell Ashton. He sports a custom deck that I designed. I'll tell you now that none of the cards have any pictures so if any readers get an idea for pics they can pm me anytime. Give me any critisism you want because guess what... if you give good responses or bad responses it still means you took the time to read my chapters. I hope you guys like. Here's chapter 1... Chapter 1: Entering a new worldChapter 1: Entering a new world “Today is the day, Grell. You finally get the chance to enroll in the top Dueling Academy in the Country. Sure you failed the exams last year, but this year you have some new tricks up your sleeve...” A young man says to himself as he runs at top speeed down the busiest street in New Domino City. He slides inbetween an unsuspecting couple. “I’m nearly late!” He hollers out loud as he slides to a stop and a pair of glass doors. On the Glass doors is the Letters “KC” on it. The letters stood from Kaida Corp, the leading distibutor of high quality electronics as well as the largest indorser to the world wide card game, Yu-Gi-Oh. It is fitting that the entrance exams to Duel Academy would be here. Two large security officers dressed in black stand infront of the man named Grell. A quick smile, wink and flash of his Dueling License and he runs passed the guards and pushes open a large, metal door. Grell is taken aback by the sheer size of the multi-zone dueling arena. 6 Duels seem to be going at a time. “Excuse me.” Grell looks to his left to see a young woman with long, blond hair standing next to him. “Can I help you?” Grell asks politely with a slight smile on his face. He looks her up and down to see that she is wearing an Obelisk Blue outfit. “Have I seen you before? I never forget a face.” She asks curiously. “You might have seen me here last year. I failed my duel. I think I stand a better chance this year.” Suddenly “Grell Ashton to Duel arena 6.” Can be heard over the intercom. “Wish me luck.” “I’ll be watching. See you on the island if you make it.” A quick wave later and Grell runs toward the farthest Duel arena on the left. Standing on the far end of the Arena is an older man wearing a black outfit. He is wearing shaded glasses and has a Duel Disk on his arm. “Howdy, partner. The name’s Spruce. I’ll be your test. If you can beat me in a Duel, you will be accepted into Duel Academy. If you fail... well better luck next time. Well, Grell, your Duel Disk is on the table over there.” Grell listens to the man, transfixed on the Duel Disk. Grell shakes off the daydream and nods at his opponent. He quickly walks to the table and slides on his duel disk. Once in his place, Grell activates his Disk. “I may have lost this Duel last year, but not this time. Game on!” ------------------------------------------Grell: 4000 (6 Cards)Spruce: 4000 (6 Cards) “Draw!” Grell shouts. “First I activate the Continuous Spell card known as the “Illusion from the Mirage” and Summon to the Field “Mirage Soldier” in Attack mode!” A shimmering man with short black hair and silver armor appears infront of Grell. A wave of distortion begins next to “Mirage Soldier” and suddenly a transparent image of the Soldier appears. “Meet the Illusion Soldier. When a Mirage monster is Normal Summoned to the Field, I can Summon 1 using the Effect of my Spell. Now I have two Monsters on the Field with 1300 Attack. Lets see what you will do. I place 1 Card face down and end my turn.” Grell: 4000 (4 Cards)Spruce: 4000 (6 Cards) Spruce chuckles. “If that all? I will Discard 1 card to Special Summon ‘The Tricky’ from my hand. I will now Normal Summon a warrior known as ‘Tune Warrior’!” A faceless clown dressed in black and white appears on the Field. Next to the Tricky, a robotic looking monster appears next to him. “That isn’t all. Since ‘Tune Warrior’ is a Tuner Monster, I can Synchro Summon ‘Colossal Fight’!” The robotic creature blasts into pieces and begins to spin around the Tricky as the Tricky begins to glow. The glowing grows brighter and when it dissapates, a large, white behemoth stands infront of Grell. Grell grits his teeth. “Since ‘Tune Warrior’ was a Warrior, ‘Colossal Fighter’ gains an additional 100 Atk. Now, ‘Colossal Fighter’ destroy that puny ‘Mirage Soldier’!” The giant charges toward the soldier but suddenly disappears. Spruce gasps as his ‘Colossal Fighter’ shimmers into place where he once stood. “It’s too bad for you that I activated a Trap card known as ‘Illusion Barrier’. This trap can be Activated as long as I have an “Illusion Soldier” on the Field. I can Negate your Attack and Draw a card for each ‘Illusion Soldier’ on the Field. I draw 1 card!” “You still don’t stand a chance against my monster. I place 1 card Face Down and end my turn.” Grell smirks as he draws his next card. Grell: 4000 (5 Cards)Spruce: 4000 (3 Cards) “First things first. I will Summon ‘Mirage Canonneer’ to the Field! That will allow me to Special Summon another “Illusion Soldier” to the Field and this one has 1800 Atk! And to top things off, I use Polymerization! By fusing ‘Mirage Soldier’ on the Field and ‘Mirage Blacksmith’ from my hand, I create ‘Mirage Champion’!” A large man with long, blonde hair appears on top of an armored horse. “My champion gains 100 Atk for each “Mirage” Monster on the Field and in my Graveyard. That brings his attack up to 2800! I will activate his effect and Discard 1 card. Now it’s your ‘Colossal Fighter’ thats going to the Graveyard! “ “WHAT?!” Spruce’s face suddenly goes white as he realizes he’s defenseless. “But that means...” “That’s right, you made a big error. Since you let your guard down, I’m going to take you down. ‘Mirage Champion’ Attack his life points directly!” The steed charges at his vulnerable target and hits its mark. Spruce laughs as the dirt settles. “You may have gotten rid of my monster, but you didn’t get rid of me because I activated my ‘Draining Shield’ Trap card. I gain 2800 Life Points.” Spruce smirks happily at his well sprung trap. “Thats okay buddy. You can gain as much as you want, because I still have monsters that can attack you Directly. Go ‘Mirage Cannoneer’ ... “Illusion Soldier’s wage war!” Grell yells as his three Monsters run in for Direct Attacks totaling 4900. “Now I place 1 card face down and end my turn.Grell: 4000 (1 Card)Spruce: 1900 (2 Cards) Spruce draws his card and smiles. “I’m sorry to tell you this, Grell, but I think you might have to come back next year. I activate ‘Smashing Ground’!” Suddenly clouds gather over ‘Mirage Champion’ A gigantic palm slams down on the monster, destroying it. “And now, Gorz will attack your ‘Mirage Canonneer’. It’s over, Grell.” “Are you forgetting something?” Spruce’s eyes grow wide once he realizes the face down card. “I activate ‘Illusion Attack!’. With this card I will send 1 ‘Mirage’ Monster from my Deck to the Graveyard and Destroy all of my ‘Illusion Soldier’ Tokens. Thanks for the help guys.” Suddenly the two ‘Illusion Soldier’s that were on the Field shatter to pieces. A shimmering image of ‘Mirage Canonneer’ appears suddenly and flashes toward Spruce before Gorz has a chance to land an attack. “I might want to tell you what is happening. Since I sent that ‘Mirage’ Monster to my Graveyard I can deal damage to you equal to the monster’s Attack. Now ‘Mirage Canonneer’, give him a close taste to defeat!” The shimmering image slashes threw Spruce as he falls to 1 knee. “I also get to draw 2 cards from my deck because I had 2 “Illusion Soldier”s on the Field when I activated it.”Spruce gets up with a smile. “Clever child but I think its my turn now. Gorz continue waging war.” Gorz jumps into the air, weapon over his head and slams down on ‘Mirage Canoneer’ with great might. Canonneer shatters to pieces as Grell takes the remaining damage. “Now my emissary Attack Grell Directly.” A skinnier version of Gorz steps forward with a large blade in hand. He leaps forward and slashes at the gut of Grell. Grell steps back from the hologram stunned. Grell: 200 (3 Cards)Spruce: 100 (3 Cards) “You will never beat me, Grell. It looks like this is as far as it goes. My monsters are way to strong for you to make a comeback.” Spruce says with confidence. Grell draws his card and then smiles. “Never count me out untill you have taken all of my Life Points. I activate the Spell card ‘Reincarnating Illusion’. With this card I can search my Deck for one ‘Mirage’ Monster who is also in my Graveyard and put it in my Hand. This comes at a cost, though. I pay half of my Life Points to use the card. Now come forth ‘Mirage Canonneer’!” Suddenly the shimmering glow of the Canoneer appears on the Field. “Because of my ‘Illusion from the Mirage’ I Special summon an ‘Illusion Soldier’. Now its time for you to go. I use my Spell card ‘Mirage Bomb’. This is no ordinary Spell card. It can only be used when ‘Mirage Canoneer’ is on the Field as well as an Illusion Token. I can Tribute my Illusion Token and turn it into a canon ball. I can then shoot it at you for a Direct attack equal to half the Tributed Token’s attack. Now go, canonneer, and finish this guy off. Siege Cannon Blast!” The ‘Illusion Soldier’ glows and suddenly explodes, revealing a glowing ball. The ball floats into the ‘Mirage Canonneer’s cannon. The monster readies and suddenly shoots the Bomb. It explodes as it passes Gorz and the Emissary. Spruce covers his eyes from the debris as his Life Points drop to 0.Spruce stares down at the ground, shocked. After a grunt from Grell, Spruce suddenly shows a smile. “That was a good duel, Grell. You have some real potential. I am the Dorm Supervisor to the Slifer Red dorm and I look forward to seeing where the chancellor will place you. Good luck and I’ll see you on the island.” Grell nods and shakes the man’s hand. He walks off of the arena still thinking about the Duel he had just won. The thought that he made it in to Duel Academy finally occurs to him when the Obelisk Blue girl walks up to him. “Good job. That was quite the victory. My name’s Lindsay by the way. Lindsay Sayers.” Grell’s face slightly turns red. “Well I think you know my name but I think there’s one way to really get to know each other...” “How is that?” She asks curiously. “A duel, of course.” Both Grell and Lindsay laugh. Lindsay pats Grell on the shoulder. “I’ll tell you what. I will be your first opponent when we make it onto the island. Just ask your Dorm Supervisor to schedule it. I like arena duels because you can earn points to purchase new duel packs in the shop.” Grell nods and the two new friends walk into the crowd to watch the remaining entrance duels. [align=center]-------Featured Cards----[/align] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CrabHelmet Posted May 7, 2010 Report Share Posted May 7, 2010 The world of Fan Fiction is a wide and varied realm. You have your adventure fanfics that flesh out an amazing and colourful world. You have your character study fanfics that explore the protagonist in ways the original author never imagined. You have your tender romantic shipping fanfics that depict a warm and fuzzy relationship between two characters that make an excellent pairing. And you have your comedy fanfics that can make the reader laugh out loud. Unfortunately, that's not all you have. You also have your fanfics that grasp the English language so badly that you begin to wonder what language they are actually written in. You have your fanfics in which a new Mary Sue appears and destroys the entire actual cast. You have your fanfics in which characters' actual personalities and histories are completely mangled to the point where they may as well be someone totally different with a similar name. You have your fanfics with totally nonsensical relationships, where the author suddenly reveals that McCoy and Snape are secretly lovers. You have your fanfics where so little follows logically that it can barely be called a story; where flat and bland characters perform mundane activities that nobody cares about; where the canon story is rehashed so directly that one wonders what the fan actually contributed; and where mediocrity is so omnipresent that one cannot find the interest to continue reading. If you are a fan of quality fanfics but you are a foe of mediocre-to-bad fanfics, then you've come to the wrong place - because today is a day for Foe Fiction. Let's begin with the title: Chapter 1: Entering a new world Already we see two aspects standing out: Genericness and poor capitalization. The former will be a constant through out the fanfic; the latter will instead be transmuted into poor spelling (and will be so transmuted with great speeed). “Today is the day, Grell. You finally get the chance to enroll in the top Dueling Academy in the Country. Sure you failed the exams last year, but this year you have some new tricks up your sleeve...” A young man says to himself as he runs at top speeed down the busiest street in New Domino City. "Although," he continues, "It's a shame you haven't improved your memory to the point where you can function without describing your current situation and backstory to yourself to avoid forgetting all of it." Thus begins the tragic tale of Grell and his battle against crippling chronic amnesia. He slides inbetween an unsuspecting couple. “I’m nearly late!” He hollers out loud as he slides to a stop and a pair of glass doors. Grell is fine with jostling random bystanders out of the way, as his resentment toward the bizarre name with which his parents burdened him has caused him to develop hatred toward all of humanity. However, despite his self-proclaimed hurry, he cannot get past some doors, presumably because he has tragically forgotten how to actually open doors. On the Glass doors is the Letters “KC” on it. The letters stood from Kaida Corp, the leading distibutor of high quality electronics as well as the largest indorser to the world wide card game, Yu-Gi-Oh. Perceptive readers will note that the card game is now referred to in-universe as "Yu-Gi-Oh", and that the rich guy's name has been changed to "Kaida". This is because Grell lives in a parallel universe where everyone shouts their status loudly for all to hear at random intervals. It is fitting that the entrance exams to Duel Academy would be here. Indeed, how appropriate that the entrance exams to a school run by Kaiba Kaida-Corp centered around a card game produced by Kaida-Corp would take place at a building owned by Kaiba-Corp. This is truly an elegance of the universe. Two large security officers dressed in black stand infront of the man named Grell. A quick smile, wink and flash of his Dueling License and he runs passed the guards and pushes open a large, metal door. Grell's first attempt to get past the guards failed because he forgot that merely smiling and winking had no chance of getting him through security, however bishonen his role as the show's protagonist might allow him to be. Fortunately, the guards took pity on the poor boy and reminded him that showing his pass would allow him to enter. They also showed him how to open a door. Grell is taken aback by the sheer size of the multi-zone dueling arena. Sure, he had seen it last year when he failed his exam, but that was long forgotten. 6 Duels seem to be going at a time. “Excuse me.” Grell looks to his left to see a young woman with long, blond hair standing next to him. “Can I help you?” Grell asks politely with a slight smile on his face. He looks her up and down Girl: "My eyes are up here!" to see that she is wearing an Obelisk Blue outfit. Grell's peripheral vision is as tragically limited as his memory. “Have I seen you before? I never forget a face.” She asks curiously. He had no memory. She had a perfect memory. And from this fusion of opposites, love began to bloom~ “You might have seen me here last year. I failed my duel. I think I stand a better chance this year.” Suddenly “Grell Ashton to Duel arena 6.” Can be heard over the intercom. “Wish me luck.” Well, that was convenient timing. “I’ll be watching. See you on the island if you make it.” A quick wave later and Grell runs toward the farthest Duel arena on the left. Standing on the far end of the Arena is an older man wearing a black outfit. He is wearing shaded glasses and has a Duel Disk on his arm. “Howdy, partner. The name’s Spruce. I’ll be your test. If you can beat me in a Duel, you will be accepted into Duel Academy. If you fail... well better luck next time. "Duel Academy may basically be an equivalent to high school, but we allow people to enter two years later than normal because we think that the time people would normally be graduating from high school is an excellent time to actually start high school. Especially gifted students who are chosen by rigorous tests to be the best of the best." Well, Grell, Audience: *applause* Spruce: *bows* your Duel Disk is on the table over there.” Grell listens to the man, transfixed on the Duel Disk. Grell shakes off the daydream Due to his memory lapse, Grell forgot to actually describe his daydream to the reader. Either that, or his daydream was just "Duel disk! :D" and Grell has the lamest daydreams ever. and nods at his opponent. He quickly walks to the table and slides on his duel disk. Once in his place, Grell activates his Disk. “I may have lost this Duel last year, but not this time. Game on!” Though one might think Grell mentions his defeat at every opportunity out of some sick sort of pride, the truth is that he won't even remember this was his second attempt unless he reminds himself out loud once every five minutes. ------------------------------------------Grell: 4000 (6 Cards)Spruce: 4000 (6 Cards) “Draw!” Grell shouts. Both have six cards before the first Draw Phase? I know the anime rules don't normally follow the real game's rules, but that's still the sort of difference I wouldn't expect to see after the Duelist Kingdom arc. “First I activate the Continuous Spell card known as the “Illusion from the Mirage” and Summon to the Field “Mirage Soldier” in Attack mode!” A shimmering man with short black hair and silver armor appears infront of Grell. Grell: "And because we're on a Desert terrain, my Mirage Soldier gets a 30% Field Power Bonus!" A wave of distortion begins next to “Mirage Soldier” and suddenly a transparent image of the Soldier appears. “Meet the Illusion Soldier. When a Mirage monster is Normal Summoned to the Field, I can Summon 1 using the Effect of my Spell. Now I have two Monsters on the Field with 1300 Attack. Lets see what you will do. I place 1 Card face down and end my turn.” Grell: 4000 (4 Cards)Spruce: 4000 (6 Cards) Spruce chuckles. “If that all? Spruce: "Seriously, you do know my Celtic Guardian can run over your monsters, right?" I will Discard 1 card to Special Summon ‘The Tricky’ from my hand. I will now Normal Summon a warrior known as ‘Tune Warrior’!” A faceless clown dressed in black and white appears on the Field. Next to the Tricky, a robotic looking monster appears next to him. “That isn’t all. Since ‘Tune Warrior’ is a Tuner Monster, I can Synchro Summon ‘Colossal Fight’!” Spruce, I'm fairly sure this Fight was a lot more Colossal before you reduced the number of monsters on the field with your Synchro Summon. The robotic creature blasts into pieces and begins to spin around the Tricky as the Tricky begins to glow. The glowing grows brighter and when it dissapates, a large, white behemoth stands infront of Grell. Grell grits his teeth. “Since ‘Tune Warrior’ was a Warrior, ‘Colossal Fighter’ gains an additional 100 Atk. Now, ‘Colossal Fighter’ destroy that puny ‘Mirage Soldier’!” The giant charges toward the soldier but suddenly disappears. Spruce gasps Spruce: "That's impossible! You mean your face-down card actually had an effect that did something!? In all my years of playing Duel Monsters, I have never seen a Spell or Trap Card with an actual effect!" as his ‘Colossal Fighter’ shimmers into place where he once stood. “It’s too bad for you that I activated a Trap card known as ‘Illusion Barrier’. This trap can be Activated as long as I have an “Illusion Soldier” on the Field. I can Negate your Attack and Draw a card for each ‘Illusion Soldier’ on the Field. I draw 1 card!” “You still don’t stand a chance against my monster. I place 1 card Face Down and end my turn.” Grell smirks as he draws his next card. Grell: 4000 (5 Cards)Spruce: 4000 (3 Cards) Shouldn't some dragons have shown up by now or something? “First things first. I will Summon ‘Mirage Canonneer’ to the Field! That will allow me to Special Summon another “Illusion Soldier” to the Field and this one has 1800 Atk! And to top things off, I use Polymerization! By fusing ‘Mirage Soldier’ on the Field and ‘Mirage Blacksmith’ from my hand, I create ‘Mirage Champion’!” A large man with long, blonde hair appears on top of an armored horse. “My champion gains 100 Atk for each “Mirage” Monster on the Field and in my Graveyard. That brings his attack up to 2800! I will activate his effect and Discard 1 card. Now it’s your ‘Colossal Fighter’ thats going to the Graveyard! “ “WHAT?!” Spruce’s face suddenly goes white as he realizes he’s defenseless. “But that means...” “That’s right, you made a big error. Since you let your guard down, I’m going to take you down. Grell: "Your mistake was thinking that you were defended just because you had a monster and a spell or trap. A true duelist knows that mere monsters, spells, and traps are a terrible defense!" ‘Mirage Champion’ Attack his life points directly!” The steed charges at his vulnerable target and hits its mark. Spruce laughs as the dirt settles. “You may have gotten rid of my monster, but you didn’t get rid of me because I activated my ‘Draining Shield’ Trap card. I gain 2800 Life Points.” Spruce smirks happily at his well sprung trap. “Thats okay buddy. You can gain as much as you want, because I still have monsters that can attack you Directly. Go ‘Mirage Cannoneer’ ... “Illusion Soldier’s wage war!” Grell yells as his three Monsters run in for Direct Attacks totaling 4900. “Now I place 1 card face down and end my turn.Grell: 4000 (1 Card)Spruce: 1900 (2 Cards) Spruce: "Wait, why am I down to two cards now when I had three at the start of Grell's turn? I didn't discard any, did I?" Blacklotis: "I lost count." Grell: "And why do I still have one card left? I started with five, summoned one, used two for a Fusion Summon, discarded one for an effect, and set one, all without drawing anyth-" Blacklotis: "Shut up, you're an amnesiac, you shouldn't even remember last turn." Spruce draws his card and smiles. “I’m sorry to tell you this, Grell, but I think you might have to come back next year. I activate ‘Smashing Ground’!” Suddenly clouds gather over ‘Mirage Champion’ A gigantic palm slams down on the monster, destroying it. That's what Smashing Ground looks like? A palm slapping a monster? I always thought it involved smashing the, uh, ground. “And now, Gorz will attack your ‘Mirage Canonneer’. It’s over, Grell.” “Are you forgetting something?” Spruce: "Like what?" Grell: "Like actually summoning Gorz? You never actually did that." Spruce’s eyes grow wide once he realizes the face down card. “I activate ‘Illusion Attack!’. With this card I will send 1 ‘Mirage’ Monster from my Deck to the Graveyard and Destroy all of my ‘Illusion Soldier’ Tokens. Thanks for the help guys.” Suddenly the two ‘Illusion Soldier’s that were on the Field shatter to pieces. A shimmering image of ‘Mirage Canonneer’ appears suddenly and flashes toward Spruce before Gorz has a chance to land an attack. “I might want to tell you what is happening. Since I sent that ‘Mirage’ Monster to my Graveyard I can deal damage to you equal to the monster’s Attack. Now ‘Mirage Canonneer’, give him a close taste to defeat!” The shimmering image slashes threw Spruce as he falls to 1 knee. “I also get to draw 2 cards from my deck because I had 2 “Illusion Soldier”s on the Field when I activated it.” Spruce gets up with a smile. “Clever child but I think its my turn now. Gorz continue waging war.” Spruce: "So, since your Trap didn't actually block my attack, I'm guessing you're the one who forgot something." And thus Grell's amnesia became common knowledge. Gorz jumps into the air, weapon over his head and slams down on ‘Mirage Canoneer’ with great might. Canonneer shatters to pieces as Grell takes the remaining damage. “Now my emissary Attack Grell Directly.” A skinnier version of Gorz steps forward with a large blade in hand. He leaps forward and slashes at the gut of Grell. Grell steps back from the hologram stunned. Apparently Gorz had generated its token at some point? Grell: 200 (3 Cards)Spruce: 100 (3 Cards) Spruce started this turn with one card and never drew any, so why does he- screw this, I give up counting cards. “You will never beat me, Grell. It looks like this is as far as it goes. My monsters are way to strong for you to make a comeback.” Spruce says with confidence. Grell has demonstrated the ability to inflict effect damage and Spruce is down to 100 Life Points. His confidence here proves what astute readers will have guessed as soon as he said "Howdy": Spruce is a colossal moron. Grell draws his card and then smiles. “Never count me out untill you have taken all of my Life Points. I activate the Spell card pleaseletitbesparkspleaseletitbesparkspleaseletitbesparks ‘Reincarnating Illusion’. aw With this card I can search my Deck for one ‘Mirage’ Monster who is also in my Graveyard and put it in my Hand. This comes at a cost, though. I pay half of my Life Points to use the card. Now come forth ‘Mirage Canonneer’!” Suddenly the shimmering glow of the Canoneer appears on the Field. “Because of my ‘Illusion from the Mirage’ I Special summon an ‘Illusion Soldier’. Now its time for you to go. I use my Spell card ‘Mirage Bomb’. This is no ordinary Spell card. Indeed, this is no ordinary spell card. It can only be used when ‘Mirage Canoneer’ is on the Field as well as an Illusion Token. I can Tribute my Illusion Token and turn it into a canon ball. I can then shoot it at you for a Direct attack equal to half the Tributed Token’s attack. So it's a ridiculously situational version of Ectoplasmer? Grell's right, this is no ordinary spell card. Most spell cards aren't this terrible. Now go, canonneer, and finish this guy off. Siege Cannon Blast!” The ‘Illusion Soldier’ glows and suddenly explodes, revealing a glowing ball. The ball floats into the ‘Mirage Canonneer’s cannon. The monster readies and suddenly shoots the Bomb. It explodes as it passes Gorz and the Emissary. Spruce covers his eyes from the debris as his Life Points drop to 0. And the readers, having been terribly worried that the protagonist might not actually be going to Duel Academy, breathe a sigh of relief. Spruce stares down at the ground, shocked. After a grunt from Grell, Spruce suddenly shows a smile. “That was a good duel, Grell. You have some real potential. I am the Dorm Supervisor to the Slifer Red dorm Grell: "Actually, if they actually let someone as terrible as you be in charge of a dorm, I don't want to go to your lame academy. Spruce: ;_; and I look forward to seeing where the chancellor will place you. Good luck and I’ll see you on the island.” Grell nods and shakes the man’s hand. He walks off of the arena still thinking about the Duel he had just won. He wants to make sure he remembers he already won his entrance duel so he doesn't embarrass himself later. The thought that he made it in to Duel Academy finally occurs to him See, he forgot why he was here. I told you he had no memory at all. when the Obelisk Blue girl walks up to him. Grell: "I'm sorry, have we met?" “Good job. That was quite the victory. My name’s Lindsay by the way. Lindsay Sayers.” Grell’s face slightly turns red. “Well I think you know my name but I think there’s one way to really get to know each other...” “How is that?” She asks curiously. “A duel, of course.” Tonegawa approves of this understanding that a true conversation can occur only through a card game. Both Grell and Lindsay laugh. Grell refuses to repeat his name and laughs at his own jokes because Grell's classy like that. Lindsay pats Grell on the shoulder. “I’ll tell you what. I will be your first opponent when we make it onto the island. Because an experienced somethingth-year in the strongest dorm is clearly a fair match for some amnesiac kid who couldn't even beat someone as stupid as Spruce on his first attempt. Just ask your Dorm Supervisor to schedule it. I like arena duels because you can earn points to purchase new duel packs in the shop.” Grell nods Why do all of Grell's conversations end with Grell silently nodding? It's like he thinks he's Link or something. and the two new friends walk into the crowd to watch the remaining entrance duels. And thus the first chapter of another Yu-Gi-Oh! GX clone comes to its conclusion. On the whole, the plot is even less interesting than that of the GX pilot - not surprising, considering it essentially is the GX pilot but with several corners cut - the characters are uninspired, the exposition is clumsy, the dialogue is clumsy, the spelling needs work, the duel is filled with inconsistencies and made even more uninteresting by the fact that the duelists are idiots and no more information about many of the cards is presented in the text itself than their names, ATKs, and "the monster has blond hair", and there is an overarching lack of anything at all innovative or special about the entire fanfic, creating a cement ceiling of mediocrity that it could not possibly break even if it were not marred by the aforementioned problems. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kaisu Posted May 7, 2010 Report Share Posted May 7, 2010 That seems like a Weather Report to me... "Duel Disk :D XD Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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