The Twilight Saga

[Super Half Vamp Riku]

discuss this series because its.....AWSOME!!!

[Kitty]

First book was okay towards the end

 

Second Book is my favorite

 

Third book was okay

 

The fourth book was a complete disaster. I hate the fourth book!!!! D:

[Super Half Vamp Riku]

im almost finished the third book

[cerberus21]

No offense, but...

 

I hate Twilight. It destroyed all the manliness Angel put into vampires. They stopped being badass creatures of the night, and started being a bunch of 90210 baggage-carrying boyfriends.

 

Guy: Hey! You got your chick-flick in my vampire stories!

Chick: Hey! You got your vampire stories in my chick-flick!

Everyone: FFFFUUUUUU-

[Donquixote Doflamingo]

I 100% agree with cerberus. It sucked.

[Guest Random Dude]

Cerberus is right, the story though is readable.

[Umbra]

I managed to read up until mid-Eclipse, where I found the story too boring to continue reading. (I was even playing with the idea that the Cullens and the Quileute(sp?) were just mind-haxxing Bella about Victoria, the character that hadn't appeared to our protagonist since the first book and had been arguably harmless until then.) It didn't give me a reason to continue reading - I didn't want to know the ending.

[Aximil]

First book was okay towards the end

 

Second Book is my favorite

 

Third book was okay

 

The fourth book was a complete disaster. I hate the fourth book!!!! D:

 

Took the words out of my mouth.

No offense' date=' but...

 

I hate Twilight. It destroyed all the manliness Angel put into vampires. They stopped being badass creatures of the night, and started being a bunch of 90210 baggage-carrying boyfriends.

 

Guy: Hey! You got your chick-flick in my vampire stories!

Chick: Hey! You got your vampire stories in my chick-flick!

Everyone: FFFFUUUUUU-

[/quote']

 

Most fantasies I hear about women having involve vampires. It's always been like this for as long as I can tell. It was only a matter of time.

[Kaisu]

I agree with Random Dude.

[Grunt Issun]

1. Twighligh is about vampires, yet its romance not horror

2. The vamps use hair gel, FRIEKING HAIR GEL

3. They care about how they look

4. there not remotly scary

5. Human vampire relation ships? dont vampires you know DRINK BLOOD!!!

6. EVERYBODY WITHOUT GARLIC AND A WODEN STAKE WOULD BE SCARED OF A VAMPIRE

7. Just plain horrible

 

all of these say worst series ever

[Super Half Vamp Riku]

if no gonna give construsctive critism,GTFO

[EliminateHRN]

I really, really like this series. Of course, it's not perfect, but neither is Harry Potter, Inheritance, or any other book series. This is a good book series, no matter what others say.

 

I like the vampires. Not much of the sparkling part of them, but everyone has different types of vampires. If it was always Dracula-type vampires, it would get boring. My vampires are different, everyone has different type of mythical creatures.

 

I like this book series. The movies are pretty good to. The girls are hot in the movies.

[Super Half Vamp Riku]

especially rosalie

[Susie]

Yeah, I've only seen the movies and I can tell that they are more suited for remaining as books.

It's a little stupid with this stupid falling in love crap but I actually kinda think it is creative

The author took horror creatures and turned them into Romance creatures, you don't find books like that do you?

[Grunt Issun]

no and you never should

[Dr. Cakey]

I like this book series. The movies are pretty good to. The girls are hot in the movies.

 

By the Transitive Property of Equality, I believe this means you liked Transformers 2.

 

Anyway, the Twilight Saga is marred very little by what we can charitably call "twists" to the vampire formula. Almost all of the problems from Twilight stem from the fact that the author is, quite frankly, not very good. This is a person who had written almost nothing before and apparently had an editor that though she was reading God's Last Word To His Creation and didn't dare touch it - should it comes as a surprise that unwieldy, 400+ page monstrosities were churned out. I'm all for large books, but it was a wise man who once said, "A politician is a person who can talk a lot without saying anything at all."

 

I took the time to read every book in the series and wrote up a quick essay as to the exact reasons Twilight is bad and posted it on Facebook. If anybody wants me to paste it here, I will.

[Sp1at]

that series is a piece of s***.

[Super Half Vamp Riku]

GTFO,BEFORE I KICK YOUR ASS AND THAN REPORT YOUR ASS

[Grunt Issun]

You cant kick us just for saying its bad, that gives you a bad reputation

and by that i mean a neg rep

[Super Half Vamp Riku]

yeah you can give CONSTRUCTIVE CRITISISM,not spamm my thread by flaming a damm book series

[Kaisu]

CnC on a book series? That has freakin' SPARKLING VAMPIRES!?

 

Twilight has ruined the world's vision of vampires for the next few years. Honestly.

 

"Mwahaha! I'm a vampire!"

"Do you sparkle?"

"Wha-? Why would I-"

"DO YOU KNOW EDWARD CULLEN!?" =3

"Who the f-"

"zOMG! YOU KNOW HEEM? TELLL MEEE~"

[Nexev]

I hated the seris, I read it, dropped the book mid Twilight, and never cared enouh to pick it up.

 

And now I never will, see I read Generation Dead.

 

In my opinion It's what Twilight should have been, the nasty part of the romance is acually acknowledged, the zombies (no vampires) exist and are known to the general public, the public doesn't like them, the villian is actually well develpoed, thiers conspiracy, and an alternate HUMAN love interest.

 

 

 

http://www.cracked.com/funny-36-twilight/

 

Explains about everything wrong with the book.

 

[spoiler=Choice quotes:]

"A mere number of days after they begin dating, Edward takes her to the woods and reveals the real reason that vampires don't go out in the sun: they sparkle. This is the turning point in what until now has been just a bad book. Bella gasps and swoons, and Edward takes his shirt off to show her all of his glitter infection, and then they lie there chastely on the grass. The rest of the book is spent talking about true love and Edward's rock-hard abs. Kissing cold, marble, statuesque lips is apparently sexy."

 

New Moon "She finally regains Edward's attention after she deliberately jumps off a cliff and almost dies. Edward, being a thirteen-year-old girl, thinks Bella has died and goes to Italy to commit suicide. He attempts to do this by exposing himself to the sun at noon in an Italian town. Since sunlight doesn't actually harm Twilight vampires, one must assume that Edward is hoping some macho Italians will see him in at full sparkle and beat him to death for being gay.

 

This novel thus teaches two important lessons to young girls everywhere:

 

1) If a guy dumps you and says he doesn't love you anymore, he doesn't mean it. All you have to do is beg and destroy your life to prove that you really love him, and he'll come right back and love you even more!

 

2) It is perfectly cool to string along innocent but decent guys who are crushing on you and then dump them immediately as soon as your ex-boyfriend reappears, and totally normal if said ex-boyfriend forbids you from seeing your old friend. After all, your love for your ex must be far stronger, because he makes you feel 'alive' and 'dangerous' since he's always on the verge of killing you. And stalking you. We can't really mention that enough."

 

 

New Moon: The book focuses on the choice Bella must make between Jacob Black and Edward Cullen, two tall, good-looking, devoted men with cool supernatural abilities. This is exactly the kind of problem that normal women face every day.

 

Halfway through, Stephenie Meyer realizes that Jacob Black is far cooler than Edward and performs a quick character assassination by having him mouth-rape her. Bella punches him and runs away, but later discovers she loves him, which teaches us more lessons:

 

1) If a girl says she doesn't love you, just keep sexually assaulting her. Eventually she'll realize she likes it.

 

2) Leading two guys on for years because you 'love them both' is perfectly acceptable, as long as you feel really bad about it at some point.

 

Breaking Dawn: "When Bella wakes up, she is covered in feathers because the sex was so rough and passionate that Edward bit a pillow. Then Edward points out that Bella is covered in bruises. She brushes off his concern and then the two of them whine about how unhappy they are now because they've made each other unhappy by being unhappy, and then we kind of stopped reading for a couple of minutes. But we learned a few more things:

 

1) It doesn't matter if he hurts you

 

2) He only did it because he loves you."

 

 

At this point the reader is filled with something not unlike calm relief. At least nothing, nothing in the world, could be more disturbing than this. Except, like, quasi-child porn or something. Luckily, of course, that would be entirely--

 

Then Jacob falls madly in love with the newborn baby girl.

 

No, we don't mean in the sense of 'Oh, I fell in love with that kitten the moment I saw it'. We mean in love love. Really, what we're trying to say--and let us know if you don't understand--is that Jacob the borderline rapist and the tiny baby vampire chest-burster are going to get married and have babies."

 

Meanwhile, Bella has been transformed into the most beautifulest sparkly vampire lady ever omg!!!11! Everyone comments on how beautiful she's become, because just when you thought this book was already its own fan-fiction the author changes her Mary Sue character into a... well, we're not even sure where you go from there. Also, Bella names her child Renesmee, after her mother Rene and Edward's "mother" Esmee. Renesmee immediately sets out to be one of the creepiest things ever, and it's only made worse when everyone talks about how perfect she is."

 

At this point, Edward's cooler siblings Alice and Jasper are like 'WTF, we are OUT of here' and run away to start a new life. The remaining vampires team up with the pedowolves for a glorious, bloody fight against the evil powers of vampire oppression, a vampiredammerung that lasts hundreds of pages and puts the most epic of Tolkien battles to blushing shame.

 

As well it should, because a lot of the vampires have special powers, like the X-Men. We know, you didn't think this story was going to be awesome, and you're so wrong, because--

 

The Cullens sit down with the Mafia Vampires and talk about their feelings for a while. The Mafia back down without a fight and head back to Anne Rice land, and Edward and Bella kiss. Also, Jacob has made Renesmee a bracelet. Did we mention that Renesmee somehow is going to grow rapidly to seventeen and then stop growing? Jacob is going to marry her, and she will be permanantly underage."

 

[Dr. Cakey]

I hated the seris' date=' I read it, dropped the book mid Twilight, and never cared enouh to pick it up.

 

And now I never will, see I read Generation Dead.

 

In my opinion It's what Twilight should have been, the nasty part of the romance is acually acknowledged, the zombies (no vampires) exist and are known to the general public, the public doesn't like them, the villian is actually well develpoed, thiers conspiracy, and an alternate HUMAN love interest.

 

 

 

http://www.cracked.com/funny-36-twilight/

 

Explains about everything wrong with the book.

 

[spoiler=Choice quotes:']

"A mere number of days after they begin dating, Edward takes her to the woods and reveals the real reason that vampires don't go out in the sun: they sparkle. This is the turning point in what until now has been just a bad book. Bella gasps and swoons, and Edward takes his shirt off to show her all of his glitter infection, and then they lie there chastely on the grass. The rest of the book is spent talking about true love and Edward's rock-hard abs. Kissing cold, marble, statuesque lips is apparently sexy."

 

New Moon "She finally regains Edward's attention after she deliberately jumps off a cliff and almost dies. Edward, being a thirteen-year-old girl, thinks Bella has died and goes to Italy to commit suicide. He attempts to do this by exposing himself to the sun at noon in an Italian town. Since sunlight doesn't actually harm Twilight vampires, one must assume that Edward is hoping some macho Italians will see him in at full sparkle and beat him to death for being gay.

 

This novel thus teaches two important lessons to young girls everywhere:

 

1) If a guy dumps you and says he doesn't love you anymore, he doesn't mean it. All you have to do is beg and destroy your life to prove that you really love him, and he'll come right back and love you even more!

 

2) It is perfectly cool to string along innocent but decent guys who are crushing on you and then dump them immediately as soon as your ex-boyfriend reappears, and totally normal if said ex-boyfriend forbids you from seeing your old friend. After all, your love for your ex must be far stronger, because he makes you feel 'alive' and 'dangerous' since he's always on the verge of killing you. And stalking you. We can't really mention that enough."

 

 

New Moon: The book focuses on the choice Bella must make between Jacob Black and Edward Cullen, two tall, good-looking, devoted men with cool supernatural abilities. This is exactly the kind of problem that normal women face every day.

 

Halfway through, Stephenie Meyer realizes that Jacob Black is far cooler than Edward and performs a quick character assassination by having him mouth-rape her. Bella punches him and runs away, but later discovers she loves him, which teaches us more lessons:

 

1) If a girl says she doesn't love you, just keep sexually assaulting her. Eventually she'll realize she likes it.

 

2) Leading two guys on for years because you 'love them both' is perfectly acceptable, as long as you feel really bad about it at some point.

 

Breaking Dawn: "When Bella wakes up, she is covered in feathers because the sex was so rough and passionate that Edward bit a pillow. Then Edward points out that Bella is covered in bruises. She brushes off his concern and then the two of them whine about how unhappy they are now because they've made each other unhappy by being unhappy, and then we kind of stopped reading for a couple of minutes. But we learned a few more things:

 

1) It doesn't matter if he hurts you

 

2) He only did it because he loves you."

 

 

At this point the reader is filled with something not unlike calm relief. At least nothing, nothing in the world, could be more disturbing than this. Except, like, quasi-child porn or something. Luckily, of course, that would be entirely--

 

Then Jacob falls madly in love with the newborn baby girl.

 

No, we don't mean in the sense of 'Oh, I fell in love with that kitten the moment I saw it'. We mean in love love. Really, what we're trying to say--and let us know if you don't understand--is that Jacob the borderline rapist and the tiny baby vampire chest-burster are going to get married and have babies."

 

Meanwhile, Bella has been transformed into the most beautifulest sparkly vampire lady ever omg!!!11! Everyone comments on how beautiful she's become, because just when you thought this book was already its own fan-fiction the author changes her Mary Sue character into a... well, we're not even sure where you go from there. Also, Bella names her child Renesmee, after her mother Rene and Edward's "mother" Esmee. Renesmee immediately sets out to be one of the creepiest things ever, and it's only made worse when everyone talks about how perfect she is."

 

At this point, Edward's cooler siblings Alice and Jasper are like 'WTF, we are OUT of here' and run away to start a new life. The remaining vampires team up with the pedowolves for a glorious, bloody fight against the evil powers of vampire oppression, a vampiredammerung that lasts hundreds of pages and puts the most epic of Tolkien battles to blushing shame.

 

As well it should, because a lot of the vampires have special powers, like the X-Men. We know, you didn't think this story was going to be awesome, and you're so wrong, because--

 

The Cullens sit down with the Mafia Vampires and talk about their feelings for a while. The Mafia back down without a fight and head back to Anne Rice land, and Edward and Bella kiss. Also, Jacob has made Renesmee a bracelet. Did we mention that Renesmee somehow is going to grow rapidly to seventeen and then stop growing? Jacob is going to marry her, and she will be permanantly underage."

 

 

<33333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333

[Luna Lovegood]

Terrible books are terrible

[EliminateHRN]

I love how everyone says the books are terrible when their really aren't. If you guys are just pissed because your vampires are ruined, get the fuck over it. I like the vampires in Twilight. Everyone has different types of mythical creatures like I said before.

 

Also, I did like Transformers 2. It was a great movie; I have no idea why everyone thought it sucked. Same goes for G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra.