Spirit of DMG Posted April 17, 2010 Report Share Posted April 17, 2010 Fusion, she seems to be a multi-tasker. She can stand around, watch Dasuke fight, and get caught all at the same time. That seems like a talent, doesn't it? Anyway, it is a good chapter. And no, Link, it doesn't seem that annoying to me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ultimate Assassin Ninjew Posted April 18, 2010 Report Share Posted April 18, 2010 How did he open his eyes twice? He closed them and opened them to turn them pale blue. He opened again without closing them for the ice thing? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DL Posted April 18, 2010 Author Report Share Posted April 18, 2010 Heheh... woops. Fixed. ^_^' Even the super write makes mistakes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Star Posted April 18, 2010 Report Share Posted April 18, 2010 Yes' date=' it is odd. I actually have the rough draft of all that will happen in my head... But... First I need to write it down, and add stuff along the way XD New chapter added.[/quote'] I know exactly what that's like, lmao. I have mine planned out for a while too, but conveying it into words is more difficult than one would think. I'm enjoying this so far, it's quite well-written, but then again your other works have been as well. I seem to struggle, though, with writing action scenes. Maybe you could help me a bit? :D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DL Posted April 18, 2010 Author Report Share Posted April 18, 2010 No problem at all. I'm quite good at action scenes, for the most part. Well, more like, fight scenes. I'm no good at chase scenes. :p Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Star Posted April 18, 2010 Report Share Posted April 18, 2010 No problem at all. I'm quite good at action scenes' date=' for the most part. Well, more like, fight scenes. I'm no good at chase scenes. :p[/quote'] I thought I was too, but I found that my fight scenes were more repetitive than anything else. It just seemed like I was using the same lines over and over again rather than having the description I want. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DL Posted April 18, 2010 Author Report Share Posted April 18, 2010 And you think I'm not doing that? Sweet. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
El Make Posted April 18, 2010 Report Share Posted April 18, 2010 Don't worry DL, you only somewhat do that... Anyways, good chap. I have a feeling Sayuki (spell?) is going to become the next Rina. -_- Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spirit of DMG Posted April 18, 2010 Report Share Posted April 18, 2010 I'll say I'm decent at fight scenes. Not so good at writing a full chapter a day, or keeping people going to my fanfics...so I've been writing at my own pace, and keeping them on my comp so i can post them a chapter a day at a later date. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DL Posted April 19, 2010 Author Report Share Posted April 19, 2010 Actually, Sayuki WON'T become the next Rina. Don't worry. ;) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
El Make Posted April 19, 2010 Report Share Posted April 19, 2010 Then why do I already feel a growing dis-liken-ment towards her? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DL Posted April 19, 2010 Author Report Share Posted April 19, 2010 Because you don't know what she can do. Heheh... (no, she cannot cast dark/fire magic) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DL Posted April 22, 2010 Author Report Share Posted April 22, 2010 New chapter added. How'd you like Sayuki's powers? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Neo Fusion Posted April 22, 2010 Report Share Posted April 22, 2010 bout time JK got in the storynice fight scene DL, shud probly let JK use some jutsu next chap tho Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DL Posted April 22, 2010 Author Report Share Posted April 22, 2010 Yep. He got in in the first 10 chapters. Also... Yeah, maybe... But... I also have more plans... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spirit of DMG Posted April 22, 2010 Report Share Posted April 22, 2010 Well, that's interesting. Anyway, I'm still wanting to see how I come into the story. Still, that is a highly interesting healing ability you two've got going there. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DL Posted April 22, 2010 Author Report Share Posted April 22, 2010 Yes, I suppose it is. And, you'll come in in due time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
El Make Posted April 23, 2010 Report Share Posted April 23, 2010 I knew that Sayuki would become my next Rina, and I was right.... Nice chap aside from Rina though. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ultimate Assassin Ninjew Posted April 23, 2010 Report Share Posted April 23, 2010 Highly interesting. Next chapter I await. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DL Posted April 23, 2010 Author Report Share Posted April 23, 2010 Geez, Sayuki is nothing like Rina. Rina used to sit in the sidelines complaining/dreaming about Sasuke. BUT Sayuki is VERY different. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spirit of DMG Posted April 24, 2010 Report Share Posted April 24, 2010 Yes, Sayuki actually sits on the sidelines distracted, and heals Die-Soo-kay every 5-7 paragraphs Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DL Posted May 5, 2010 Author Report Share Posted May 5, 2010 ANYway, new chapter added on my second post on the first page. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Neo Fusion Posted May 5, 2010 Report Share Posted May 5, 2010 good chapter, except why isnt it in the first post like the rest of themand Sayuki seems a little OOC, but then again, we havent seen her mad either so i guess it fits Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
El Make Posted May 5, 2010 Report Share Posted May 5, 2010 Fusion, there's a limit to how much you can put in one post. And DL, Sayuki is without a doubt the new Rina. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Neo Fusion Posted May 5, 2010 Report Share Posted May 5, 2010 oh didnt know that...Rina from Hayate right? I keep getting distracted from reading it... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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