<«Writer's Arena»>

[hilltop3]

HI ALL IM NEW!!!! HOW YALL DOIN!!!!!

[Twig]

HI ALL IM NEW!!!! HOW YALL DOIN!!!!!

 

Please don't spam. Fill out the form if you want to join.

[.Legend]

I added a second half too the prolog in my fanfict

 

 

I hate overly fanatasy Fanficts that make no sence

[DL]

Monster types:

 

Kribbons:

 

Creatures that stand about two feet off the ground, and have pointy ears. Their teeth are pointed, like a dog’s, and their skin has a purple tinge. They live in large groups.

 

Azukars:

 

Skin also has a purple tinge, but they walk upright. Basic form of a human. Command Kribbons.

[Twig]

I added a second half too the prolog in my fanfict

 

 

I hate overly fanatasy Fanficts that make no sence

 

I don't think a fanfic can be overly fantasy.

[DL]

and what say you to my monsters? The names suck, I know.

 

I'm not good with monster names.

[Twig]

So Azukars are basically humans except they have a different colored skin?

[DL]

they LOOK human.

 

They're very different culture-wise.

[Twig]

they LOOK human.

 

They're very different culture-wise.

 

Oh.

 

This is the prologue so far.

 

 

 

The clock struck the twelve with both hands' date=' signaling that midnight had arrived. Born under a large tree, a baby unlike most babies was born. Even in the ominous wind, not a cry uttered from his small mouth. For comfort, all he had was the warmth of his parent's embrace. All three of them sat there, illuminated only by the glow of the full moon and light of the shining stars. The mother cried with warm tears of happiness.

 

"It's a miracle," Clerotes, the father, said.

 

Before the baby was born, Enallia, the mother, had a severe illness. They thought the illness could harm the baby, or even worse, kill the baby. It was a miracle to the parents that nothing had happened, nothing went wrong, nothing at all.

 

"Oh it's a boy! What should we name him?"

 

"Now, now, Enallia. We should find a good place for you and the baby to rest."

 

 

 

*Seven Years Later*

 

"Father, where are you going?" asked Primerio.

 

"To work in the fields."

 

Primerio frowned and crossed his arms. "I thought you only worked for eight hours."

 

"I am working two more hours. The price of food has risen. I'm afraid you'll have to start working, too."

 

"Work in the fields?"

 

"They won't take anymore workers, and if they were, they woud not take you. You're too young. I've talked to Tybalt Reguran."

 

"You want me to work for him?"

 

"You'll be his apprentice."

 

"But father! He is a grumpy old man. Nobody likes him at all."

 

"I am afraid we have no choice. He's the only one taking an apprentice. We have spoken to everyone. You will start tomorrow."

 

Primerio's father headed outside with a sad face. Before he left, he said one more thing. "Your mom and I only want the best for you."

 

Primerio was about to reply, but his father had already closed the door. [i']Why do they always have to work? Not only are they in the fields most of the time, but do we really have to live in a village where kids are scarce?[/i] Primerio had caught the bad habit of talking to himself. There's hardly any kids, and the kids that are actually there doesn't talk to him.

 

Primerio decided to go outside to have his last walk around town freely before he has to work non-stop with Tybalt Reguran, the blacksmith. As he strolled down the green grassy field, he saw a girl. The sight of the girl stopped him. He had never seen a girl before. He'd seen women, but never a girl at the same age as him.

---

they LOOK human.

 

They're very different culture-wise.

 

Oh.

 

This is the prologue so far.

 

 

 

The clock struck the twelve with both hands' date=' signaling that midnight had arrived. Born under a large tree, a baby unlike most babies was born. Even in the ominous wind, not a cry uttered from his small mouth. For comfort, all he had was the warmth of his parent's embrace. All three of them sat there, illuminated only by the glow of the full moon and light of the shining stars. The mother cried with warm tears of happiness.

 

"It's a miracle," Clerotes, the father, said.

 

Before the baby was born, Enallia, the mother, had a severe illness. They thought the illness could harm the baby, or even worse, kill the baby. It was a miracle to the parents that nothing had happened, nothing went wrong, nothing at all.

 

"Oh it's a boy! What should we name him?"

 

"Now, now, Enallia. We should find a good place for you and the baby to rest."

 

 

 

*Seven Years Later*

 

"Father, where are you going?" asked Primerio.

 

"To work in the fields."

 

Primerio frowned and crossed his arms. "I thought you only worked for eight hours."

 

"I am working two more hours. The price of food has risen. I'm afraid you'll have to start working, too."

 

"Work in the fields?"

 

"They won't take anymore workers, and if they were, they woud not take you. You're too young. I've talked to Tybalt Reguran."

 

"You want me to work for him?"

 

"You'll be his apprentice."

 

"But father! He is a grumpy old man. Nobody likes him at all."

 

"I am afraid we have no choice. He's the only one taking an apprentice. We have spoken to everyone. You will start tomorrow."

 

Primerio's father headed outside with a sad face. Before he left, he said one more thing. "Your mom and I only want the best for you."

 

Primerio was about to reply, but his father had already closed the door. [i']Why do they always have to work? Not only are they in the fields most of the time, but do we really have to live in a village where kids are scarce?[/i] Primerio had caught the bad habit of talking to himself. There's hardly any kids, and the kids that are actually there doesn't talk to him.

 

Primerio decided to go outside to have his last walk around town freely before he has to work non-stop with Tybalt Reguran, the blacksmith. As he strolled down the green grassy field, he saw a girl. The sight of the girl stopped him. He had never seen a girl before. He'd seen women, but never a girl at the same age as him.

 

 

Edit: It posted twice. o_o

[DL]

The clock struck the twelve with both hands, signaling that midnight had arrived. Born under a large tree, a baby unlike most babies was born. Even in the ominous wind, not a cry uttered from his small mouth. For comfort, all he had was the warmth of his parent's embrace. All three of them sat there, illuminated only by the glow of the full moon and light of the shining stars. The mother cried, a smile across her face..

 

"It's a miracle," Clerotes, the father, said.

 

Before the baby was born, Enallia, the mother, had a severe illness. They thought the illness could harm the baby, or even worse, kill him. It was a miracle to the parents that nothing had happened. Nothing went wrong. Nothing at all.

 

"Oh it's a boy! What should we name him?"

 

"Now, now, Enallia. We should find a good place for you and the baby to rest."

 

 

 

*Seven Years Later*

 

"Father, where are you going?" asked Primerio.

 

"To work in the fields."

 

Primerio frowned and crossed his arms. "I thought you only worked for eight hours."

 

"I am working two more hours. The price of food has risen. I'm afraid you'll have to start working, too."

 

"Work in the fields?"

 

"They won't take anymore workers, and if they were, they wolud not take you. You're too young. I've talked to Tybalt Reguran."

 

"You want me to work for him?"

 

"You'll be his apprentice."

 

"But father! He is a grumpy old man. Nobody likes him at all."

 

"I am afraid we have no choice. He's the only one taking an apprentice. We have spoken to everyone. You will start tomorrow."

 

Primerio's father headed outside with a sad face. Before he left, he said one more thing. "Your mom and I only want the best for you."

 

Primerio was about to reply, but his father had already closed the door. Why do they always have to work? Not only are they in the fields most of the time, but do we really have to live in a village where kids are scarce? Primerio had caught the bad habit of talking to himself. There're hardly any kids, and the kids that are actually there don't talk to him.

 

Primerio decided to go outside to have his last walk around town freely before he has to work with Tybalt Reguran, the blacksmith. As he strolled down the green grassy field, he saw a girl. He stopped in his tracks. He had never seen a girl before. He'd seen women, but never a girl, much less one the same age as him.

 

 

 

I fixed a couple of spelling errors, and spacing, but otherwise, noly some minor fixes.

 

I'll take a closer look after school.

[Twig]

Thanks. I have to go to school soon. >.

[DL]

And I'm already in school XD

[Survivor]

Username: IonicIvy

Favorite Books: Little Brother - Cory Doctorow, Pendragon Series - D.J. MacHale, Hunger

Games Series - Suzanne Collins

Books Currently Reading: MacBeth - William Shakespeare, The Sorceress - Michael Scott, The

DaVinci Code - Dan Brown

Writing Example(I forgot how to make a spoiler. Sorry.):

As I looked downward into the chasm, I could not identify where I had arrived from. An undemanding instant before I had been only steps away from the entrance of my bedroom, but now I stand on planks of lumber attached to a craggy cliff, only inches away from a seemingly bottomless depression, the breeze quickening through my hair. The others are situated around me, motionless, their mouths open, eyes wide and filled with fear. The only sound was the wind. Then in the expanse, there is a sound of a bird. I look to the others yet again, and notice that I am not the only one to take notice of it. Matthew is the foremost person to say something. He usually is.

 

Please take out everything in parenthesis.

[DL]

Interesting...

 

Accepted. ^_^

[Pichu]

Username:tghr02

Favorite Books: Horror stories

Books Currently Reading : Scat

[spoiler=Writing Example

]"Mom, get the cookies", yelled Molly."Sorry I can right now, me and your Dad are leaving and Alexis will be here any time now". "Mom!" I yelled. "What?" "Their sleepover is tonight!?!" "Yeah don't you remember." "But Nate is coming over." "Well too bad, Maxwell" yelled Mom. "It's Max", I said. Ding dong. Taylor and Molly ran to the door. Taylor opened the door to see Nate. "Hey girls, is Max there?" said Nate. "Yes he ..." Molly said right before Taylor interrupted her. "He pouting about how our sleepover is tonight." Taylor was always the loud and noisy one. Mom and Dad left when Alexis came. It was only five o'clock. The girls were calling boys which Mom said not to do, but come on. What else are three 13 year old girls going to do at a sleepover. Nate and I were playing video games, which is what two 15 year old boys should do at a sleepover. Then my cell phone rang. "Hello", I said into the phone. I heard deep breathing then, whoever it was, hung up. Later at seven, is when the real-life horror movie started.

 

[DL]

Hmm... horror stories, seem kinda vague, but accepted.

[Pichu]

Hmm... horror stories' date=' seem kinda vague, but accepted.

[/quote']

cool thanks

that writing example is from a horror story im writing its chapter one

[Compass]

Username: Compass3

 

Favorite Books/Books Currently Reading: Favorite: His dark Materials! Currently reading: A wind in the door, HIVE #2, just finished A midsummer night's dream.

 

Writing Example:

The lake’s waters softly rippled as the gondala cut though the waters, slowly but effectively. The driver, cloaked in black, silently picked up speed. They where comeing. They would be here soon. They would find him, dead and without the box. He set the paddle down, and stood, the boat rocking a bit. He reached into his coat, and took out the small, black box that had caused him so much trouble. He opened it, staring at the contents. He then closed it, as he heard sounds of commotion upstairs. He smiled, holding the box at arm’s lengeth. He dropped it, and with a soft splash, it fell into the water. He rowed back to shore, and from his boot, pulled a long, lethal-looking kinife.

Never had suidice been easier.

 

Please take out everything in parenthesis.

[SmallieBigs]

Twig I agree.

 

Favorite Books/Books Currently Reading: Harry Potter some others I forget.

Writing Example: (you know my failurism Twig)

[Twig]

Compass3 and Daily News accepted.

 

@Daily News: Agree about what? I forgot. xD

[SmallieBigs]

The fact that Turtwigs are cool

[Twig]

The fact that Turtwigs are cool

 

Ok.

 

Anyways, new topic: Books/writing that you hate.

[Compass]

Horror. I. Hate. Horror. I'm really a scaredy-cat, so that could be why...and the goosebumps series. they have the evilet covers, and are really poorly written, from what I've heard.

[Azerty-of-KoL]

There are not many books I dislike, but the one thing I really hate is book-movies that have nothing to do with the original book.

[Twig]

Horror. I. Hate. Horror. I'm really a scaredy-cat' date=' so that could be why...and the goosebumps series. they have the evilet covers, and are really poorly written, from what I've heard.

[/quote']

 

I also hate reading horror. The goosebump series was ok. It was made to attract kids, not teens.

 

There are not many books I dislike' date=' but the one thing I really hate is book-movies that have nothing to do with the original book.

[/quote']

 

Same. Hopefully, they won't totally ruin Percy Jackson.