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Original Story: Life of a Hopeless Prodigy (Chapter 2 added!)

Haseo

By Haseo
in Creative Writing

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Haseo

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[align=center][spoiler=Prologue(Updated)]

The year is 2100 and the world is full of different fighters. Fighters that use guns, swords, fists, some fighters not even human, and even robots, but the strongest of them all is a child. A child of two legendary fighters. The father is the Fist King. The mother is the Queen of Weapons. This child is named Tsuna Kuwachi. He is born to become the best fighter in the world. Except he doesn't have an ounce of talent for fighting.

 

Tsuna's adventure started the moment he was born. After coming out of the hospital, his father trained him. Every day he trained and then he became 5. At his 5th birthday there came an assassin that supposedly killed Tsuna's parents. Tsuna then was taken in by his grandfather and grandmother from his father's side. They own their own inn and they are also masters of fighting. Then his grandfather trained him for future purposes. At the age of 10, Tsuna joined a tournament with older fighters. He would be the winner of the tournament is what everybody thought. Except he lost the fight in the first round. On that day no one thought of him as a prodigy. Just a boy who has legendary parents not a prodigy.

 

His grandfather was deeply mad at his lost and trained him like there was no tomorrow. At about the age of 11, he should have been a strong fighter. Not even close. This child had many years of training, but couldn't use it in battle. Everyone gave up on him, but not his family. They continued to train. Tsuna then joined another tournament when he became 12. The boy lost again at the first round. What kind of prodigy is that? That was what most people asked, but Tsuna didn't like fighting. Weird thing for a person in a family and world of fighting, but Tsuna would only fight to protect his loved ones. His family trained him for just that reason.

 

His grandfather than told him about his parents. Tsuna was excited to hear about them being alive. His grandfather than told him that he has taught him all the basics and that Tsuna will not learn anymore for him until he gets stronger. Tsuna for 12 years has only trained his body and the basics. Nothing complex. Then, at Tsuna's 13th birthday his grandfather gave him three items.

 

The three items were his father's gloves for training, his mother's sword she use when she was younger, and a ticket that lets him go to his mother's father. Tsuna's grandfather then told him about the organization called S.I.N. and that he has to defeat them to find out where his parents are, but Tsuna first has to get stronger. His journey to his other grandfather will make him a better person. From this day on Tsuna's life will become the weirdest, funniest, and hardiest life you have ever heard of. Let the adventure begin.

 

 

[spoiler=Chapter 1]

"See ya, Grandpa!" Tsuna yelled out running to the train station.

 

"Bye, young lad, try not to get into so much danger!" Tsuna's grandpa. Tsuna rushed to the train even though there was no reason to run. Tsuna was just really eager to find out about his mom's side of the family. Tsuna entered the train station. He was breathing hard, but compared to his training that was a piece of cake. Tsuna stood in the line to see when the train would come. Train lived in a town named Yakuzo Town and it was pretty big. The train station would always be packed.

 

"Attention!Attention!The train to Sundale Town will be leaving shortly!" The loud speakers announced. Tsuna had to get on the that train. Tsuna walked away from the line and looked for the train he is supposed to be riding. As Tsuna was looking around for the train, he saw a cute girl waiting for someone. He stared at her for a few moments. She turned to look at him and Tsuna turned his fast swiftly. He then saw the sign saying where the train he needs to get on was and Tsuna ran to it. Tsuna entered the train and sat next to a window. He didn't bring anything for the trip except money and food.

 

Tsuna eats about 5 times what a normal boy should eat. As he was looking through the window, he say the girl he was staring at before. She was just standing there until two tough looking men approached her. They then talked and Tsuna saw the girls face get angry. One of the man moved a step and hit her. Tsuna's killing intent rose! Tsuna ran to the girl, but then the girl got up. The girl then jumped and gave the man that hit her a big roundhouse kick. Tsuna became immediately afraid of helping her. The girl then turned around and gave the other man a rapid storm of kicks. The two men became unconscious. Tsuna became so scared that he crawled back the the train.

 

"Wait!" The girl exclaimed. "Get over here!" The girl continued.

 

"O...OK." Tsuna replied. Tsuna got up from the ground and walked up to her. His legs were shaking tremendously, but not for the reason you think. Tsuna has never talked to a girl before! Tsuna opened his mouth to speak, but he stuttered. The girl laughed and she spoke first.

 

"Hello, my name is Rinslet Hazel." Rinslet told Tsuna. "What is your name?" Rinslet asked.

 

Tsuna took a minute to think. At that moment he forgot his name. "My...name is Tsuna Kuwachi!" Tsuna replied. Rinslet then grabbed his hand and she ran into the train to Sundale Town. She sat down and I sat next to her. The train then moved slowly to Sundale. The train ride takes about 6 hours. We had plenty of time to talk.

 

"Tsuna, why are you going to Sundale?" Rinslet asked. Tsuna had an answer, but he didn't tell her the answer. He wanted to know what happened back there.

 

"Before I answer that, who were those men?" Tsuna asked in a serious tone. Rinslet grinned and told him.

 

"Since you already saw me fight them, I will tell you. They are part of the organization of S.I.N. and they were asking for information I had about one of the things they are looking for." Rinslet answered. Tsuna then knew that she would help him on his mission.

 

"Rinslet, I to am looking for this organization!" Tsuna exclaimed. Then Tsuna and Rinslet talked about the organization and other things. Tsuna figured out that Rinslet is the same age as him, she learned how to fight from her mother that disappeared when she was 5 also, Rinslet is going to Sundale town to find her grandma's friend that will help Rinslet find her parnets, and some things about S.I.N intentions. The organization S.I.N is looking for the best of the best fighters and making a army of them to conquer the world. Except this organization is split into about 5 different smaller organizations and those control smaller organizations. Each one is looking for either fighters or items that boost power or legendary weapons. Since Rinslet knew all this about them, she was chosen as a target to kill. Tsuna then knew that this adventure would be long and hard, but most importantly this adventure would bring Rinslet and him closer.

 

[spoiler= Chapter 2]

"We will be arriving at Sundale town at approximately 5 minutes. Please do not forget any of your belongings. Also, have a nice time in Sundale town!" The speakers in the train sounded. The train was slowing down and Rinslet's face looked nervous. Tsuna didn't know what to say.

 

"Um......Rinslet. Why don't we get off of this train ride and get some ice cream?" Tsuna asked trying to cheer her up. Tsuna didn't want to ask why she was nervous, but he had to.

 

"Sure, thank you. Tsuna you really are a nice guy." Rinslet replied. Tsuna blushed and they both walked out of the train. Now they were in the Sundale train station. Tsuna had a map to find the ice cream store.

 

"Let's go!" Tsuna yelling at Rinslet who is observing the train station. "Was this her first time here?" Tsuna asked himself. "Maybe that is why she is nervous." Tsuna continued talking to himself. Rinslet walked over to him and she smiled. Tsuna was happy to see her smile.

 

"So..... Tsuna. Which way do we take to go to the ice cream store?" Rinslet asked Tsuna. Tsuna looked at the map. He tried to read it, but he couldn't understand anything on it. Tsuna never read a map and he didn't even try to read the map key. Tsuna put the map away and he was going on instincts.

 

"We should go this way and then we will find it." Tsuna pointing in the right direction. Tsuna and Rinslet walked for about 10 minutes.

 

 

"Tsuna, are you sure this is right? Let me see the map!" Rinslet demanded. Tsuna took out the map and gave it to Rinslet. Rinslet began to look for the ice cream store. Rinslet suddenly looked at Tsuna with a disappointed look.

 

"What's wrong?" Tsuna asked. Rinslet face became like a balloon full of hot air.

 

"What's wrong! You took us into the opposite side of town! We were supposed to take a left not a right!" Rinslet exploded with anger. Rinslet stood in a kicking stance and Rinslet gave Tsuna a kick in the face. "If you ever guess on where we go next, then you better remember that kick!" Rinslet shouted. Tsuna nose was bleeding and Rinslet didn't look angry anymore. Rinslet then took a napkin and wiped the blood off. Rinslet then looked at Tsuna and smiled. "Maybe I kicked you to hard." Rinslet said. Tsuna nodded and he wasn't going to say another word. At this point Tsuna might die before he finds anything about anyone.

 

[spoiler=Characters]

[spoiler=Tusna]

Name:Tsuna Kuwachi

Age so far: 13

Appearance: http://knightcat.deviantart.com/art/Reborn-10-Tsuna-72477702

Ways of fighting: Gun, Sword, and fists

 

[spoiler=Rinslet]

Name Rinslet Hazel

Age so far: 13

Appearance: Rinslet Walker

 

 

 

 

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Haseo Newbie

Haseo

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I'm actually quite interested in this; keep it up. *Bookmarked*. Although get your spelling a little better' date=' I saw a few errors.

 

[align=center']The Agito Seal of Approval!

 

1e445f5d8421e89b.png[/align]

 

Thank you. I updated the prologue a little so I have fewer errors. Also, Tsuna's character profile is up.

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Haseo Newbie

Haseo

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I like it. ^^

 

I noticed a number of spelling and grammar errors' date=' but seeing as I'm not an english teacher, I could care less.

 

The only thing that I question is how does any old assassin beat the King of Fists and the Queen of Swords?

[/quote']

His parents weren't killed. They were just pretending to die. So Tsuna doesn't get attacked.

This character is exactly like your RP character.

 

Oh well' date=' that's probbaly because he works.

 

I can suggest a character if you like.

[/quote']

Sure!

 

Also, Chapter 1 added and Rinslet's profile!

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Haseo Newbie

Haseo

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Oooh' date=' I just have to suggest too, eh? :D

 

CHapter one was nice, though you should go to more details about the organization later on :3

[/quote']

 

Pm me the character and also I don't want to say to much in a chapter. I will talk about the S.I.N. when Tsuna gets to Sundale town and meets his grandfather and grandma from his mom's family.

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Guest Supreme Gamesmaster

Guest Supreme Gamesmaster

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"S.I.N?" Really? Who works for a group called "S.I.N?"

 

Don't pour out a whole backstory at once. We really only need a motivation for the protagonist at the beginning; the rest should be filled in as the story progresses. If you're gonna describe a whole backstory, take at least a chapter to do it.

 

While you're at it, remember: NO AUXILIARY INFORMATION SHOULD BE NECESSARY TO UNDERSTAND THE STORY, unless those are stories in themselves.

 

Oh, and the sentence structure is redundant and boring.

 

Anyway, this story is pretty cheesy, so...

 

[spoiler=Mystery Science Ripoff 3892 — Episode 12: Life of a Hopeless Prodigy, Part 1]

The Team:

Negi Springfield from Maho Sensei Negima!

Shinobu NLNG from 2x2 Shinobuden

Kaede NLNG from 2x2 Shinobuden

 

"See ya, Grandpa!" Tsuna yelled out running to the train station.

Shinobu: In media res!

Kaede: So what does any of this look like?

 

"Bye, young lad, try not to get into so much danger!"

Negi: *nag* "Bye, young lad, try not to use run-on sentences!"

 

Tsuna's grandpa.

Kaede: ...huh?

Shinobu: What about Tsuna's grandpa?

Negi: ERROR 400 — CRITICAL SYNTAX ERROR

 

Tsuna

Kaede: —who shall not be described, of course...

 

rushed to the train

Shinobu: He's there already?! You'd think they'd describe on the way...

 

even though there was no reason to run.

Negi: You're admitting it's pointless?

 

Tsuna was just really eager to find out about his mom's side of the family.

Shinobu: Uh... why?

 

Tsuna entered the train station.

Kaede: Which could, for all we know, look like Onsokumaru. Heck, it could be Onsokumaru.

 

He was breathing hard,

Negi: No angst. It's all your fault.

 

but compared to his training

Shinobu: Ooooh! Train, training, I get it! ...that was really lame.

Kaede: That was probably unintentional.

Negi: Anyway, what training? He shouldn't be breathing hard if he's trained to run!

Kaede: I guess he's just trained to make bread.

Negi: ...bread?

Kaede: Really, really good bread.

Shinobu: ...uh huh.

 

that was a piece of cake.

Kaede: ...no pun intended. I swear, no pun intended! I don't read ahead on anything, ever!

Shinobu: It's okay. *hugs*

Negi: So why are you breathing hard if that was easy?

 

Tsuna stood in the line to see when the train would come.

Negi: What a colorful vocabulary this author has!

Kaede: Oh, and since they haven't been described yet, the train is Komatsu Satoshi and Tsuna's a prune.

Shinobu: So does that mean Onsokumaru ate Komatsu-san after he slipped a prune in his lunch?!

Kaede: Uh... I guess his mouth's open, for, like, the tunnel out...

 

Train lived

Negi: The author's caught on to our ruminations, it would seem.

 

in a town named

Negi: Oh, all inanimate objects are proper nouns.

Kaede: What is this, Thomas the Tank Engine?

 

Yakuzo Town

All: ...

Kaede: Welcome to Yakuzo Town. Population: Several complete monsters with the resources to do whatever they want and a stupid prune who didn't get the hint that the Yakuza are evil.

 

and it was pretty big.

Shinobu: No kidding, he's 180 centimetres!

 

The train station would always be packed.

Kaede: It kept closing its mouth to try and kiss its far-too-innocent apprentice.

 

"Attention!Attention!The

Negi: *other nag* "—space bar on the author's keyboard has died! Please abandon the story immediately!"

 

train to Sundale Town

Shinobu: Hey, isn't that from Pokémon?

Kaede: I would not be surprised...

 

will be leaving shortly!"

Negi: *other nag* "Anyone who wants to get out of Yakuza Town should get moving!"

 

The loud speakers announced.

Shinobu: What did they announce?

Negi: *other nag* "Attention!Attention!The shift key on The author's keyboard is acting up!"

 

Tsuna had to get on the that train.

Negi: I had to defeat Chao and save mankind.

 

Tsuna walked away from the line and looked for the train he is

Negi: One tense at a time, please.

 

supposed to be riding.

Shinobu: That way, he'd be sure to ride a different one and end up in Mafio Town.

 

As Tsuna was looking around for the train, he saw a cute girl

Shinobu: —and, of course, it was love at first sight.

Kaede: You're getting good at this.

Shinobu: *staring at Kaede* Though he had a job to do now, he would be certain to return and befriend this girl...

Kaede: Creeped out now.

 

waiting for someone.

Kaede: And he knows this how?

 

He stared at her for a few moments.

Shinobu: Then he got pummeled by some disembodied green hands for thinking things like that.

Kaede: ...you know what they've been thinking this whole time?

Shinobu: Well, no, but that's what you and Miyabi-chan always say. "Don't think things like that!"

 

She turned to look at him and Tsuna turned his fast swiftly.

Negi: Such gripping action!

Kaede: So far, a prune has ogled Miyabi and eaten... something. Great.

 

He then saw the sign saying where the train he needs to get on was and Tsuna ran to it.

Negi: Your verbs need a lot of work. That sentence was really boring.

Shinobu: Those sentences were more interesting!

 

Tsuna entered the train

Kaede: So far, this entire story has been a metaphor for a famous baseball player eating a prune.

Negi: The worst part is, there's no way to disprove that.

 

and sat next to a window. He didn't bring anything for the trip except money and food.

Shinobu: Some water would have been a good idea.

 

Tsuna eats about 5 times what a normal boy should eat.

Negi: I hope that's not supposed to be a lovable character trait.

Kaede: "The Slayers" already did that, and it wasn't this hideously boring.

 

As he was looking through the window, he say

Shinobu: WHAT YOU SAY?

 

the girl he was staring at before.

Kaede: All your girl you was staring at are belong to us.

 

She was just standing there

Shinobu: *singing 'Winter Wonderland'* "Standin' there, gettin' stared at..."

 

until two tough looking men approached her.

Negi: Either Miyabi or the prune will beat the crap out of them.

 

They then talked and Tsuna saw the girls

Shinobu: There's more?

Kaede: They'll be...

Shinobu: Kaede and me!

Kaede: That's brilliant!

Shinobu: Really?

Kaede: That was an apostrophe error, so now... we get to be in this story only when we feel like it!

 

face get angry.

Shinobu: *Miyabi* "My face is very angry right now!"

Kaede: *gales of laughter*

 

One of the man moved a step

Negi: *one of the man* "I'll just move this step here..."

Shinobu: *one of the man* "Hm... Maybe I'll put it on this hikikomori's balcony."

Kaede: *stares at Shinobu, horrified*

 

and hit her. Tsuna's killing intent rose!

Negi: The first, least-deserved exclamation mark in the piece.

 

Tsuna ran to the girl,

Shinobu: From inside Train?!

 

but then the girl got up.

Negi: She was down?

 

The girl then jumped and gave the man that hit her a

Shinobu: —a front-punch whirlwind-kick combination.

Kaede: That's a good idea. This undescribed girl is now Konata Izumi.

 

big roundhouse kick.

Negi: You know, tactically, that's not a good move. Small kicks are generally faster and more accurate, while you're more likely to lose momentum on big ones.

 

Tsuna became immediately afraid of

Kaede: —awkward sentence structure.

 

helping her. The girl then turned around and gave the other man a rapid storm of

Kaede: —bland verbs and repetitive sentence structure.

 

kicks. The two men became unconscious.

All: ...no comment.

 

Tsuna became so scared that he crawled back the the train.

Negi: Why didn't you go there to begin with?

 

"Wait!" The girl exclaimed.

Kaede: *Konata* "My quotes are all being stolen by a hyperactive shift key and its army of misplaced periods!"

Negi: The worst part is, that sounds in-character for her.

 

"Get over here!" The girl continued.

Shinobu: This is all the same sentence?

Negi: I might expect a sentence like that from Asuna, not an author...

 

"O...OK." Tsuna replied.

Negi: *prune* "Looks like my quotes are being taken too. I meant to say something, but the sentence ended too soon!"

 

Tsuna got up from the ground and walked up to her.

Negi: I'm getting used to this.

Shinobu: That's bad.

Negi: I know.

 

His legs were shaking tremendously, but not for the reason you think.

Kaede: No, he wasn't at all afraid of getting his skull bashed in by a short, blue-haired otaku...

 

Tsuna has never talked to a girl before!

Shinobu: Never?

Negi: Apparently not.

Shinobu: Not even his mom?

Kaede: I guess not.

Shinobu: Or a sister, or a grandparent, or...

Negi: Gender-segregated society, I think.

Shinobu: But they share a train station...

All: ...no comment.

 

Tsuna opened his mouth to speak, but he stuttered.

Shinobu: The misplaced period stole his text.

 

The girl laughed and she spoke first.

Kaede: One too many pronouns there, pal.

 

"Hello, my name is Rinslet Hazel."

Shinobu: Well, that's what her nameplate read.

Kaede: I noticed because I was

 

Rinslet told Tsuna.

Shinobu: She was lying.

 

"What is your name?" Rinslet asked.

Negi: Again, I can ask for this kind of sentence structure from the Baka Rangers...

 

Tsuna took a minute to think.

Shinobu: Konata-chan is very patient.

 

At that moment he forgot his name.

Negi: This is a very pathetic person.

 

"My...name is Tsuna Kuwachi!" Tsuna replied. Rinslet then

Kaede: What is it with this author and "then?"

 

grabbed his hand and she

Negi: Run-on-sen-tence...

 

ran into the train to Sundale Town.

Shinobu: Welcome back, Komatsu-san!

 

She sat down and I sat next to her.

Negi: Conjunctions do not work that way.

 

The train then moved slowly to Sundale.

Kaede: Naturally, Komatsu-san would want to save his energy for the game.

 

The train ride takes about 6 hours.

Shinobu: Does it, now?

 

We had plenty of time to talk.

Kaede: Unfortunately for you, you're a loser, so you also have plenty of time to get rejected.

Negi: On the other hand, this is Konata we're talking about...

Kaede: Good point. She'll have a great time teasing him to death and back.

 

"Tsuna, why are you going to Sundale?" Rinslet asked.

Shinobu: *Konata* "I mean, besides the obvious..."

 

Tsuna had an answer, but he didn't tell her the answer.

Shinobu: Phoning the Department of Redundancy Department...

Negi: Demonstratives exist.

 

He wanted to know what happened back there.

Negi: Let me guess. *prune* "What happened back there?"

 

"Before I answer that, who were those men?" Tsuna asked in a serious tone.

Negi: Well, I guess it could be worse.

 

Rinslet grinned

Kaede: *Konata* "Sheesh, what a loser. I mean, even I can have some social skills when I want to..."

Shinobu: *Konata* "But I can't believe I'm talking to a prune inside a professional baseball player!"

 

and told him.

 

"Since you already saw me fight them, I will tell you.

Shinobu: Phoning the Department of Redundancy Department...

 

They are part of the organization of S.I.N.

All: OH COME ON.

Kaede: Really? S.I.N.? What the hell kind of organization actually calls themselves S.I.N.?!

Negi: The worst part is, that punctuation at the end is valid.

 

and they were asking for information I had about one of the things they are looking for."

Shinobu: *Konata* "I won't tell you anything about this thing; that wouldn't be fun!"

 

Rinslet answered.

Negi: Speaker tags aren't strictly necessary.

Kaede: Give it up; the grammar is just bad in this.

 

Tsuna then knew that she would help him on his mission.

Shinobu: What does S.I.N. have to do with going on a quest to meet your divorced mother?

 

"Rinslet, I to am looking for this organization!" Tsuna exclaimed.

All: YOU ARE NOT!

Kaede: You just wanted to find out about your mom! You said so yourself!

Negi: And what was that "to" there for?

 

Then Tsuna and Rinslet talked about the organization and other things.

Negi: Oh, that's specific.

 

Tsuna figured out that Rinslet is the same age as him, she learned how to fight from her mother that disappeared when she was 5 also, Rinslet is going to Sundale town to find her grandma's friend that will help Rinslet find her parnets, and some things about S.I.N intentions.

Negi: More detail! Too much info in too little space there.

 

The organization S.I.N is

Negi: Oh, dear. It's still standing, apparently.

Kaede: God help us all.

 

looking for the best of the best fighters and making a army of them to conquer the world.

Kaede: Oh, that's original.

 

Except this organization is split into about 5 different smaller organizations and those control smaller organizations. Each one is looking for either fighters or items that boost power or legendary weapons. Since Rinslet knew all this about them, she was chosen as a target to kill.

Kaede: Of course, even Sasuke could beat their assassins.

 

Tsuna then knew that this adventure would be long and hard, but most importantlythis adventure would

Shinobu: —restore working keyboards and grammar to the fair land of Hopeless Prodigy!

 

bring Rinslet and him closer.

Shinobu: *stares adoringly at Kaede* Told you.

Kaede: Even more creeped out now.

 

 

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Guest Supreme Gamesmaster

Guest Supreme Gamesmaster

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Not crush; very harshly review. And really, it's all in fun. If you try, you can MyST Romance of the Three Kingdoms pretty easily.

 

The trick is to read the review first, then take the MySTing with a pinch of salt.

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