Spirit of DMG Posted February 18, 2010 Author Report Share Posted February 18, 2010 Kailyn: my new name pertains to...nothing. I actually made it up to have a more original name, while still maintaining the initials "DMG" plus, I think it sounds cooler. (And, it gives new members a harder time figuring out if I'm male or Female.) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kailyn Leona Kyosuke Posted February 18, 2010 Report Share Posted February 18, 2010 lol amazing. Tho im sure everyone here's figured u out lol. so...was topic sigs or fics? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sploda Posted February 18, 2010 Report Share Posted February 18, 2010 @Kailynboth, please read mine. i really need feedback.First time ever writing a story. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nexev Posted February 18, 2010 Report Share Posted February 18, 2010 Donovyn, I did. Honestly. And it told me nothing, except time travel might be involved. In fact the slight costume alteration might be worn out fabric. If I'm right you'd hate me. Also the one guy is a perv. So he's probbaly a ninja since the closeted pervert is a crazy scientist. That's not me, I am just really really REALLLY twisted. I actually have a song that's likely more funked up than anything yo guys made. To be fair it was a request. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spirit of DMG Posted February 18, 2010 Author Report Share Posted February 18, 2010 Kail:Or at least, They think they have. I'm pretty sure we're discussing both right now. Creator:I refuse to sever my loyalties to Jessica. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sploda Posted February 18, 2010 Report Share Posted February 18, 2010 @NexevWhat?Your statement is confusing but yes the perverted guy is a ninja who gets kicks from Sprites that look like they are about 8 years of age.Also If I'm supposed to be a scientist you are wrong. i am an Inventor and there is a difference.Also I'm not perverted.@DMG...Please don't start last time I converesed about that statement in my sig I got all dark and evil and people freaked out. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Enma Kozato Posted February 18, 2010 Report Share Posted February 18, 2010 @creatorI had that name before you did and I didnt just copywright itI trademarked and patented itpwnDMG I think you need to be more informative on some parts of your fanfic Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sploda Posted February 18, 2010 Report Share Posted February 18, 2010 @Chaselike when have you used that name.And I don't care I'm a Mime I can ignore copyrights anyway.Plus what is yours is mine as well.Would you like to continue? If so I could probably think up 15 different names that you have never used before and you wouldn't think of. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nexev Posted February 18, 2010 Report Share Posted February 18, 2010 Creator if you can freak me out then I will have to counter with my distrubing song that is pg-16. AND sung by The Burger King. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kailyn Leona Kyosuke Posted February 18, 2010 Report Share Posted February 18, 2010 Kail: Or at least' date=' They think they have. I'm pretty sure we're discussing both right now. Creator:I refuse to sever my loyalties to Jessica.[/quote'] ooh kk took me a bit to figure out since it looks like a face. anyway, give me a sec to read both fics, im cleaning mah room. I havent posted anything ive written but maybe i will someday. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sploda Posted February 18, 2010 Report Share Posted February 18, 2010 @NexevWell tell me, what disturbs you and if nothing then I will mimic your song and have Ronald Mcdonald sing it WITH the girl from Wendys. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Enma Kozato Posted February 18, 2010 Report Share Posted February 18, 2010 @creatorLike in lets see1,2,3at least 3 RPs before Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sploda Posted February 18, 2010 Report Share Posted February 18, 2010 @Chasenever seen them and only 3?Firikin used the name in 5 off-site and 2 here (almost 3 but changed my mind). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spirit of DMG Posted February 18, 2010 Author Report Share Posted February 18, 2010 Its the first chapter. I left some parts vague on purpose for the sole purpose of making them clear later. So, anyway, can anyone find a third Train Heartnet GIF?Creator, if you can freak me out, then there's a problem. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sploda Posted February 18, 2010 Report Share Posted February 18, 2010 @DMGNever heard of it ever, so no I can't. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kailyn Leona Kyosuke Posted February 18, 2010 Report Share Posted February 18, 2010 DMG, your fic nees a bit more on the character development. i have no idea what crytal looks like or what her personality is like. Good job setting the description of the location though. Leeroy, your fic is just the opposite. I know the characters, and have some idea of what their enviornment is like, but know nothing of where they might be and what that place is like (aside from what i might assume is a mild-temperature area. Also you could do with more description of the characters. Both fics have good starts, now see if you cant develop on some of the most key points in writing. Who - is the character(s)what - are they likewhen - era of time? medival? modern? future?where - Fantasy land? Earth? Mars? Russia?why - are the characters therehow - did they get there? thats only for the characters and setting theres more for whatever else you write of course, but always answer those 6 things in your writing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sploda Posted February 18, 2010 Report Share Posted February 18, 2010 Really I thought I made the Characters quite clear in the description. I gave names, and physical descriptions (not personality you get to see that as I go). When is complicated, Where I kinda plainly stated in Chapter 1 or 2. Because they live there and well they were born there. ...Also I'm trying to describe where they are going seeing as how they were leaving (ne need to describe somewhere they won't be for long). Thanks Kailyn. LEEERRRROOOOYYYY JEEENNNKKKIIINNNSSS!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kailyn Leona Kyosuke Posted February 18, 2010 Report Share Posted February 18, 2010 npg fix Also, just to let you know, i only read chapter 1 of your fic Leeroy, since i was reading both and DMG only has one. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sploda Posted February 18, 2010 Report Share Posted February 18, 2010 Really?There are like 4 more.#6 will be up tommorow.Unlike DL I don't post one a day, I actually have to think this up as I go. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kailyn Leona Kyosuke Posted February 18, 2010 Report Share Posted February 18, 2010 well ive been thinking of doing something...i just cant think of what. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sploda Posted February 18, 2010 Report Share Posted February 18, 2010 Well maybe I could help.Hold on going to PM you... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spirit of DMG Posted February 18, 2010 Author Report Share Posted February 18, 2010 Thanks for the critique, Kail, but, how she got there, as stated, she doesn't know, and since it starts there, I didn't feel the need to include that, the reason for that is stated I believe in Chapter 2.The personalities develop as we goThe where I plan on changing fairly oftenWhen, it should be assumed in literature that if the time period is not stated, it is in (the writers) presentI try to give a description of the character without making it sound like a police BOLOWhy they are there: it should be obvious at the end, but if its not, its stated in Chapter 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kailyn Leona Kyosuke Posted February 18, 2010 Report Share Posted February 18, 2010 i must admit, i only skimmed the bulk of both of ur chapter 1's, not a thurough read at all. Even if nothing else its something to keep in mind. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sploda Posted February 18, 2010 Report Share Posted February 18, 2010 ...Ok now please read them. Actually read them.I hate when people skim something important to me!I never skim through a book/story. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kailyn Leona Kyosuke Posted February 18, 2010 Report Share Posted February 18, 2010 sorry, i just happen to be a tad busy IRL at the moment, hence the scan. I will of course give it a thurough read, but one thing i always keep in mind is try to make your audience want to never let go. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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