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Yu-Gi-Oh!: Legend of Metal season one. First comment gets a rep!

eyeofthedeck

By eyeofthedeck
in Creative Writing

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eyeofthedeck Newbie

eyeofthedeck

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Welcome to my first *good* fanfic. You might know my other horrible attempts at fanfics from a few years ago when I was about 9, maybe 10. Now I'm almost 12 and have "Proppar Gramahrr/Spelng" And decided to have another go at fanfics. My old ones failed dismally and didn't go beyond 2 episodes. my old fanfics were called "Yugioh Duel Academy", "Yugioh Duel Nightmares (Fanfic version)" and I think one more. Please view them and compare them with my current work.

 

Anyway, to the character bios: (NOTE: There is only a couple characters at the moment because the main character is a loner for a while)

 

[spoiler= Character Bios]Name: James

Age: 14

Gender: Male

Deck: Metal legends deck

Appearance: Shoulder length purple hair like Trunks from DBZ, Dark Blue eyes, 5"5 tall.

Personality: A loner, quickly gets 2 rivals, listens to Heavy Metal music a lot, Get's teased and called emo.

 

Name: Mike

Age: 14

Gender: Male

Deck: unknown

Appearance: Messy Black hair, Brown eyes, 5" tall

Personality: Weak sidekick, hangs out with groups of people.

 

 

 

NOTE: I will put all the episodes on this page in spoilers when I have time. If I get heaps of time on my hands I will rewrite the first 2 episodes without using script format.

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eyeofthedeck Newbie

eyeofthedeck

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001 – The Entrance Exam

 

 

James sat in his seat patiently. He had been waiting for hours. Then he heard his name being called so he stood up and made his way to arena 2. Once there the duelling proctor gave him his oral exam.

 

“Okay, last question: What is 7 + 14?” The proctor asked James. “What does that have to do with duel monsters?” James asked. “Correct!” The proctor said. “Now it’s time for your duel.

 

FORMAT CHANGE

 

James LP: 5000

Proctor LP: 5000

 

(Note: this is based in the future and in the future you start off with 5000 LP)

 

James - I will go first! I summon Metal Legend – Corey Taylor in attack mode! <1600> Next I place a face down card and end my turn.

 

Proctor - My turn! I play ookazi!

 

BOOM

 

James - Ugh!

 

James LP: 4200

 

Proctor - And now I summon giant soldier of stone in defence mode! I end my turn!

 

James - My turn! I play Band Formation! Now I can special summon one fusion monster with “metal legends” in its name! I choose Metal Legends – Slipknot! <3200> and now I equip Slipknot with Duality! Now Slipknot can attack directly one time only! So go, use Duality!

 

Proctor - AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

Proctor LP: 1800

 

Proctor - Urgh! It’s my turn now! I sacrifice giant soldier of stone to summon ancient labyrinth in defence mode! <3500> I end my turn.

 

James - Rats! I guess I need a lucky draw. *draws* Yes! Just the card I wanted! I play Metal Legend – Anders Colsefini in attack mode! <1200> Now you may not know what is so special about him, but he can be sent to the graveyard when Metal Legends – Slipknot is on the field and when I do that you take 500 LP damage!

 

BOOM

 

Proctor - Ouch!

Proctor LP: 1300

 

Proctor - My move! I sacrifice Ancient Labyrinth to summon Chaotic Warrior in attack mode! <2900> and he gains 300 attack points for every monster in your Graveyard! *Chaotic Warrior’s attack rises to 3200* And now I play his other ability. I halve his attack points and then that same amount comes out of your life points!

*Chaotic Warrior takes off some of his armour and throws it at James*

 

James - Aaaaahhhhhhhhh!!!!!

James LP: 1800

 

Proctor - Now I place a face down and end my turn.

 

James - My turn! I sacrifice Corey Taylor to summon Legendary Guitarist – Phil Collen in attack mode! <2300> And his effect lets him attack twice in the same battle phase if his first attack is successful! So go Phil Collen, attack with riff of doom!

 

Proctor - Nice try but my face down, lost, negates your monster’s attack and returns it to your deck.

 

James - Damn! It’s still my turn! I set a face down. That’s all.

 

Proctor - My move! I summon Chaotic Beast in attack mode! <1500> Chaotic Beast attack!

 

James - I don’t think so! I activate my face down Cancelled! Now all monsters on your side of the field are destroyed. And by the way why did you try to attack a monster more than twice as strong as your monster?

 

Proctor - Because my Chaotic Beast’s effect reduces all battle damage I take to 0 and deals the amount of damage I would’ve taken to you.

 

James - Oh. Well it’s my turn now! I summon Dancing Guitar in attack mode! <1800> go, attack with Hypno-solo!

 

BOOM

 

Proctor LP: 0000

 

??? - Impressive. He might be tough to beat.

 

To be continued…

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eyeofthedeck Newbie

eyeofthedeck

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hmm...don't use script format....more describe...

the beginning is bad...you have to add a prologue..

you have to work on this a lot...you should give it to someone who would correct it for you if you are not good with english..

 

 

I wanted to use both formats. As with the beginning I started this ages ago and just continued it. I corrected all the grammar mistakes and wrote the rest of the episode. Besides this episode is short and other episodes will have fair parts of description. Everything that's not in the duel will be in normal format but the duels will be script format.

 

Anyway here's episode 2:

 

002 – Standing up for the Slifer’s

 

James was walking in the forest calmly. The Ra yellow dorm was too noisy. Sometimes he just wanted to be alone and work out strategies for winning duels and maybe modify his deck.

 

“Give me my Red Eyes Black Dragon!” A voice shouted out. “No way. We’re gonna keep it until you find us some more good cards,” Another voice shouted back. James could hear a gang of people laughing. He ran in the direction of the laughter. “Look at the little baby cry!” Another voice rang out.

 

James turned the corner and there stood a short Slifer red duelist getting pushed, shoved and teased by a gang of about 8 Obelisk blues. “Give him back his Red Eyes Black Dragon or I’ll force you to,” James threatened them. The leader of the gang walked towards James and whispered in his ear “Who’s gonna make me?” before punching James in the gut. James winced in pain but didn’t bend over. He held back a tear that was gathering in his eye. “I will,” James replied. “I don’t have time to duel you,” the leader said. “Liam, get over here!” “Jeremy, you can do it,” Liam replied. “Yeah, what’s the matter, too scared to duel me?” James teased. “I’ll show you who’s scared! I’ll duel you!” Jeremy half-shouted. “You’re too weak. How about you and Liam duel me at the same time?” James challenged. “Sure, why not?” Jeremy replied.

 

James LP: 5000

Jeremy LP: 5000

Liam LP: 5000

 

James – I’ll start! *draws* I summon Metal Legend – Mick Thompson in attack mode! <1500> I end my turn with a face down!

 

Jeremy – My go! *draws* I summon exiled force in attack mode! <1000>Next I play the spell card Final Countdown! After this card has been in play for 20 turns I automatically win the duel!

 

James – WHAT?!

 

Jeremy – Yes, that’s correct. Anyway I play my field spell ring of fire. When this is on the field if I have a monster that is weaker than one of yours that monster can attack you directly! Go, Exiled Force, use arrow storm!

 

BOOM

 

James – AHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

 

James LP: 4000

 

Turn Countdown: 19

 

Liam – My go! *draws* I play pot of greed! *draws 2 cards* I summon Spear dragon in attack mode! <1900> Go Spear Dragon, attack his Metal legend – Mick Thompson with Snout Impale!

 

James – Not so fast! I activate my face down: riot! I sacrifice 500 Life points to reverse your attack at your own Life Points!

 

Liam – What? NO!

 

BOOM!

 

James LP: 3500

Liam LP: 3100

 

Liam – I’ll end my turn!

 

Turn Countdown: 18

 

James - *draws* I play graceful charity! *draws 3 cards and discards 2* I play Band Formation! Due to band formation’s effect I can special summon metal legends – slipknot! <3200> I now equip metal legends – slipknot with wait and bleed! I remove Mick Thompson from play in order for slipknot to gain 700 attack points! *Slipknot’s attack rises to 3900* Now Slipknot, attack exiled force with wait and bleed!

 

SUPER BOOM!

 

Jeremy – AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

 

Jeremy LP: 2100

Turn Countdown: 17

 

Jeremy – My move! *draws* I play Graceful Charity! *draws 3 cards then discards 2* I play warrior of Zera in defence mode and end my turn! <1600>

 

Turn Countdown: 16

 

Liam – I surrender! I can’t win!

 

James and Jeremy - …o.k.…

 

Turn Countdown: 15

 

James - *draws* Um, I attack warrior of Zera with Slipknot! Go, Wait and Bleed!

 

BOOM

 

James - I end my turn.

 

Turn Countdown: 14

 

Jeremy – I summon Marauding Captain in defence mode <400>. And because of his effect I can play another monster! I choose Chaosrider Gustaph in defence mode <1500>. And because of my marauding captain’s effect you can only attack Marauding captain! Your move!

 

Turn Countdown: 13

 

James - *draws* I attack Marauding Captain with Slipknot! Wait and bleed!

 

BOOM

 

James - I end my turn.

 

Turn Countdown: 12

 

James *in head* - Damn! If I don’t do something quick he will win even if I keep attacking with Slipknot!

 

Jeremy – My go! *draws* I summon Gazelle the king of mythical beasts in defence mode <1200>! I end my turn

 

Turn Countdown: 11

 

James – I set a monster in face down defence position! Slipknot, attack Gazelle with wait and bleed!

 

BOOM

 

James - Your shot!

 

Turn Countdown: 10

 

Jeremy – My go! *draws* I play my spell card Change of heart!

 

James – Uh-Oh!

 

Jeremy – I’m guessing from that “Uh-Oh” that you know what this card does! In case you don’t, I’ll tell you! This lest me take control of your Slipknot for one turn! Now Slipknot, attack with wait and bleed!

 

James – Flip summon, metal legend – Joey Jordison <1700>

 

Jeremy – He is weak! Slipknot, crush Joey!

 

Boom

 

James – Damn!

 

Jeremy – I end my turn

 

Turn Countdown: 9

 

James – Draw! *draws* I remove Joey Jordison from my graveyard to raise Slipknot’s attack by 700! *Slipknot’s attack rises to 4600* Go slipknot, attack Chaosrider Gustaph with wait and bleed!

 

BOOM

 

James - I end my turn.

 

Turn Countdown: 8

 

Jeremy – *draws* I play goblin Decoy squad in defence mode <0000>

 

James – Why did you play a monster with 0 defence points?

 

Jeremy – Because I have no other monsters in my hand. And I’m just stalling and waiting for final countdown to finish.

 

James – Oh…

 

Jeremy – Your move…

 

Turn Countdown: 7

 

James – *draws* I’ll attack your Goblin Decoy Squad with Wait and Bleed!

 

BOOM

 

James – I’m done

 

Turn Countdown: 6

 

Jeremy - *draws* I summon Pursuit chaser in defence mode <600> your go!

 

Turn Countdown: 5

 

James - *draws* I attack your Pursuit Chaser with my Slipknot! Go, use wait and bleed!

 

BOOM

 

Jeremy – I was hoping you would do that. When Pursuit Chaser is on the field and a defence position monster is destroyed you take 500 points of damage!

 

James LP: 3000

 

James – I’ll end my turn

 

Turn Countdown: 4

 

Jeremy – I summon twin sword marauder in defence mode <1000> and I end my turn

 

Turn Countdown: 3

 

James *in head* - I have to hurry if I want to beat him*

 

James - *draws* I attack your twin sword marauder with Wait and Bleed!

 

BOOM

 

James – I’ll place 2 face downs and end my turn

 

Turn Countdown: 2

 

Jeremy – I’ll play the spell Dian Keto the Cure Master which lets me regain 1000 life points!

 

Jeremy LP: 3100

 

Jeremy – Next I play the spell Peek ‘N’ Shuffle! This allows me to look at the top five cards in my deck and rearrange them! *draws 5 then rearranges them* and now I’ll summon Dark Blade in defence mode! <1500> I’ll end my turn

 

Turn Countdown: 1

 

James - *draws* I’m gonna start by having my Slipknot attack Dark Blade with Wait and Bleed!

 

BOOM

 

James – Now I’m going to activate the spell card spell steal! This lets me switch a spell card that’s on your side of the field to my side of the field and I choose Final Countdown!

 

Jeremy – NOOOOOOOOOO!

 

James – Yes! Now I’ll end my turn!

 

Turn Countdown: 0

 

Jeremy *in head* - OK, this is the last turn of the duel. If I could somehow get the final countdown back to my side of the field I could still win. Wait a minute; I have a copy of spell steal in my graveyard from when I used my graceful charity! And When I rearranged the top five cards in my deck I put the top one as cup of ace! And the one after that was Spell from beyond the grave! OK, I’ve got a plan

 

James – Will you hurry up and draw? I wanna finish this duel soon.

 

Jeremy - *draws* I play the spell card cup of ace!

 

James – OK, what does that do?

 

Jeremy – Typical Ra Yellow students. This spell card lets me flip a coin. Heads, I draw two cards. Tails, you draw two cards

 

James – What are you scheming?

 

Jeremy – You’ll find out! *flips the coin* Heads! Yes! *draws 2 cards* I play the spell card spell from beyond the grave!

 

James – OH NO!

 

Jeremy – Yes, do you think you know what I’m scheming now?

 

James – You’re gonna play Change of heart and take control of my Slipknot then attack me directly?

 

Jeremy – No. I’m gonna bring back my spell steal

 

James – But you don’t have a spell steal in your graveyard!

 

Jeremy – Think again

 

James – Oh yeah, you used a graceful charity.

 

Jeremy – that’s right and now I’m going to bring back my Spell Steal and use it to get my Final Countdown back!

 

James – I don’t think so, Jeremy! I have a trap! Security! I choose one spell, trap or monster on my side of the field and that card is protected from the effects of all spells, traps and monsters!

 

Jeremy – OH NO!

 

James – I’m using it on Final Countdown!

 

Jeremy – NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

 

James – Oh yeah! And now I activate my second face-down, boo-ed from the stage, which can only be played after you summon, set or activate a card! It forces you to end your turn! Final Countdown, activate!

 

*Final countdown starts glowing then explodes and knocks Jeremy over*

 

James – It’s over Jeremy!

 

Gang of Obelisks – Jeremy!

 

DUEL OVER

 

James walked up to Jeremy’s unconscious body. “You guys give the Slifer kid back his cards and take Jeremy out of here!” James ordered the gang of Obelisks. Liam ran up to Jeremy, picked him up and ran off after the other members of the gang. James walked away back the way he had come.

 

When he got to the door of his room at the Ra yellow dorm, he felt in his pockets for the key. Not there. “Lost you key, huh?” James spun around as soon as he heard the voice. He saw his roommate standing before him. “Hi Mike” “Where were you? You look worn out,” He said. “I just had a duel with an Obelisk named Jeremy,” James said matter-of-factly. “Did you win?” Mike quickly asked. “Yeah, I used his own spell card against him,” James informed Mike. Mike handed James the spare key to their room. James unlocked the door then they both stepped into the room. James walked up to his bed and noticed a letter lying innocently on his pillow. James put the letter on his workbench. He would read it later

 

To be continued…

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Guest Merciful Idiot

Guest Merciful Idiot

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Put your chapters in SPOILERS! And don't use script format. I'll bother reading after you fix that. And learn to EDIT as well.

 

[spoiler=Spoilers]

[spoiler=Insert Title Here]Insert description here[/spoiler]

 

 

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