ItsToonTime Posted May 26, 2009 Report Share Posted May 26, 2009 This is a story of a card game I'm designing called "Mages and Monsters". It's similar to Yu-Gi-Oh, but with alot of changes. Yugi is not the main character here, it's a goth boy named Devon. First Chap#1 It Begins Unable to move, Devon was fast asleep, but was fighting a nightmare. He tried to move but some force has disabled that from him. *In his dream* There he was, a tall regular-built goth in a black trench coat, black jeans with a studded belt, black hair, two gloves with no fingers, and two gothic wristbands. Opposite of his direction was a giant dark-green dragon with a muscular built. The dragon fiercely spread his wings and screeched of that of a giant bat. Devon, looking at this creature, was astonished when the dragon presented itself to him. And in one quick flash, the dragon swallowed him whole. "Beware thy self, child!" The dragon hissed "For thy soul will agonize within the gates of Hades!" With that, the dragon cackled as thunder roared in the sky. *In real Life*Devon awoke with a look of pure terror on his face. He looked at the clock on his wall, 6:55 AM. He rubbed his head and groaned as he disappointingly tried to get ready for school. He staggered downstairs and uncovered his pet parrot, Squaws, who was a budgie, and had a shower. During that, he was still thinking about that dream, the dream that began to haunt him for a while. When he got out, it was 7:12 AM. He ate his breakfast, slipped on his usual attire and left the house. At R.B.Russell High School, another boy named Waylon Traverse was sitting on a bench inside, what appears to be skulking. Devon was wondering that when he got inside. He never usually talks to anyone, so Devon thought he could make him welcome. "Hey Waylon." Devon greeted him with a cheerful grin. "What do you want?" Waylon growled at him. "Nothing" Devon replied in confusion "I just want to say 'hi'" "Well, you said it, now beat it!" Waylon barked. "Jeez, what's with you?" Waylon didn't reply. So Devon continued to walk to a nearby computer and did his downloading of Nox Arcana's Grimm Tales music onto a CD. It took a while, because he's using a Mac Computer. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kendo Fish Posted May 28, 2009 Report Share Posted May 28, 2009 Nothing much exciting yet...it looks like it's going somewhere, though. Just look at your writing again and see if it makes the most sense. Is squaws a parrot or a budgie, or both? There's more I could comment on, but I have to go, unfortunately. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PsycicMaster10101 Posted May 28, 2009 Report Share Posted May 28, 2009 try puting the chapter in the click to veiw mode by typing[spo*iler=title] text [/spo*iler]without the *s if you do it right it should look like this [spoiler=title] text Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ItsToonTime Posted June 5, 2009 Author Report Share Posted June 5, 2009 This is actually my first story so far... I'm working on it... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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