Fallen Hero Posted March 15, 2009 Author Report Share Posted March 15, 2009 you know what i'll just let you guys keep on working it out for the time being, it's fun confusing peopleare you gonna put up a character request soon Aelsthla-Mental?just so i know of course Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aelsthla-Mental Posted March 15, 2009 Report Share Posted March 15, 2009 A hunter you say? Works for me. Name: Hilario LocoAge: 18Country you came from: Spain/BritainBeast Form: ScorpionSide(escapee or hunter): HunterBiography: Born in Spain with Spanish parents, at three months his parents moved to Britain. As such he learned English well, with only a few choice Spanish words. He was brought up somewhat... oddly. His parents rarely stuck to the rules they started with, and altered them lots of the time. One minute they would be giving him ice cream, the next they would shout at him for eating too much sugar. The upbringing gave him a somewhat... odd personality.His parents died when he was fifteen, they were killed in a hostage situation at a local bank where they were getting money for a plasma television. Strangely, he seemed rather... uncaring of his parents death, when told merely sighed, cheerfully said they were with God now, and started searching for a job.His mutation was revealed a year later, oddly enough, at a friend's birthday party. They had been playing Truth or Dare and he had gone for truth. They had asked if he had a girlfriend and suddenly a large scorpion (about the size of an average human) was in the room. Naturally everyone freaked out and escaped, leaving him scuttling around the room, then getting bored and exiting the house into the world. He managed to go far away from there as a scorpion and reverted back to human form, where he got a job for a short time at EB Games, before being found and he turned once again into a scorpion, and killed several before turning back into a human and being captured. He was carefully released when the military realized to stop the escapees they needed the creatures themselves. He seemed happy to help, but the military doesn't trust the happy, go-lucky personality and have implanted numerous tracking devices to keep an eye on him. No actual guards though, perhaps due to his poisonous abilities...Normal Appearance(plz use pics): Beast Appearance(plz use pics if possible): (Just add scorpion pincer 'arms' to it)Elemental Enhancement(while in beast form, only allowed one): Poison Special Moves/Abilities(while in beast form and plz describe them the best you can):Toxic Claw: Both the stinger at the end of the tail, and the Pincers have a deadly poison in them, able to kill an ordinary human in minutes from a scratch, seconds if a stab. This is passive, so it always works.Toxin Adaption: A rather odd ability that may show a further improved process of the genome mist, the toxins used by Hilario can in fact adapt against people with an immunity, or who have consumed an antidote. Also, This ability allows Hilario himself to be immune to almost any poison, and no poison will work twice.Poison Mist: An adaption allows him to spray from his tail a poisonous mist. While It is not as deadly as the toxin on his stinger and pincers, it can be deadly on skin contact and not just in the bloodstream.Nervo Shot: A toxin that at a mental command can enter Hilario's bloodstream (being the exception to the Toxin Adaption). The toxin in fact speeds his nervous response, allowing him enhanced speed, agility, and mental prowess. However if during the time the toxin is in his body and he reverts to human, it will leave him sick, if not dead.Poisonous Aura: Even without the poison mist, Hilario has an aura of toxins exuding from his body that attacks the nervous system of nearby creatures, the closer they are the more powerful the attack gets. With concentration this aura can be prevented on being used on nearby allies, but can leave Hilario distracted, and more vulnerable.Toxin Barrier: Out of every pore of his 'skin', Hilario oozes a toxin that shoots out of the body, before solidifying as a barrier due to certain properties that is given to it as it goes through the skin.Toxic Bullet: Hilario fires the stinger on his tail like a bullet, usually the shot penetrates right through the skin and releases the toxin, causing almost instantaneous death, very accurate. Although it takes half an hour to regenerate the stinger. Transformation(how they turn into the beast form): First his skin goes hard and scaly, the tail bursts out, his arms turn into pincer, and finally his 'legs' turn into scorpion-legs and two more on each side burst out of his skin. His eyes also split into 8 beady yellow eyes (like the pic, instead of a scorpion's normal black. Hope it's all A-OK! ...is it? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fallen Hero Posted March 15, 2009 Author Report Share Posted March 15, 2009 yeah it's ok, just didn't expect the bio to be that big Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aelsthla-Mental Posted March 15, 2009 Report Share Posted March 15, 2009 *shrugs* I like bios. You can edit it if you want. Just wanted to show his personality, and (sort of) why he is helping capture the others... Although it is not too obvious why, he just seems crazy. You might want to add an alternative motive, or just make him a loose cannon :). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fallen Hero Posted March 15, 2009 Author Report Share Posted March 15, 2009 i think with the name and personality he's more of a loose cannon. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aelsthla-Mental Posted March 15, 2009 Report Share Posted March 15, 2009 Hey, you got the name! I mean, 'Loco' is well known, but still... LOL ...Anyway, when should this story be updated? I'll keep an eye on it, but I suppose a general idea would be nice. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fallen Hero Posted March 15, 2009 Author Report Share Posted March 15, 2009 At the most in the next 3 days, just depends on me being in the frame of mind to be honest Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aelsthla-Mental Posted March 15, 2009 Report Share Posted March 15, 2009 Aahh k, I won't bother asking again, I'll just wait and see from now on. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silent Omega Posted March 15, 2009 Report Share Posted March 15, 2009 Haha You're Scorpion pic looks like it's from Halo LOL.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phantom Roxas Posted March 15, 2009 Report Share Posted March 15, 2009 If you're really 18 like your profile says, you should be able to write even a decent fanfic. You rarely capitalize "I", and you often forget to use periods when necessary. I'm sorry, I know you wrote more, but I just had to stop during Chapter 1 to say this. I took a quick peak at your other chapters, and I didn't see much improvement. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silent Omega Posted March 15, 2009 Report Share Posted March 15, 2009 I Have one more character Name:DavidAge:19Country you came from:USABeast Form:Large PhoenixSide(escapee or hunter):EscapeeBiography:As a Child, He was borned to live with his Power.He was one of the Few that escaped when kevin and the rest escaped.However he did not Follow them but Searched the Forest to find his Brother...Alex.Normal Appearance(plz use pics):Beast Appearance(plz use pics if possible):Elemental Enhancement(while in beast form, only allowed one):FireSpecial Moves/Abilities:Able to shoot Fire from it's mouthFlight:(Flies)Revival:(Revives anybody)Transformation:He becomes Developed in Fire,His Bones Grow Larger,His Arms turn to wings,And then he becomes a phoenix. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
.:Abarai Renji:. Posted March 15, 2009 Report Share Posted March 15, 2009 Phoenix is spelled like this! Phoenix. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fenrir Posted March 15, 2009 Report Share Posted March 15, 2009 Haha You're Scorpion pic looks like it's from Halo LOL.... Not even close. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
.:Abarai Renji:. Posted March 15, 2009 Report Share Posted March 15, 2009 The pic is a Leaper from Resistance: Fall Of Man. BTW, Fenrir! I got Resistance 2 today! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fenrir Posted March 15, 2009 Report Share Posted March 15, 2009 God damnit. Lucky <_< Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silent Omega Posted March 15, 2009 Report Share Posted March 15, 2009 WOW IT looks like it's from Halo..I mean the way it looks like is just disgusting.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
.:Abarai Renji:. Posted March 15, 2009 Report Share Posted March 15, 2009 God damnit. Lucky <_< Yea, I know! I'm sooooo lucky! ^_^ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fenrir Posted March 15, 2009 Report Share Posted March 15, 2009 WOW IT looks like it's from Halo..I mean the way it looks like is just disgusting.... Uhm no. It doesn't even look close to a Flood. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silent Omega Posted March 15, 2009 Report Share Posted March 15, 2009 Yeah I guess....But it's still disgusting....BTW Chapter 11 on my fanfic is up!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ragnarok1945 Posted March 15, 2009 Report Share Posted March 15, 2009 now these new characters are going to make a strain on the military to harness their powers. This should prove interesting to say the least Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silent Omega Posted March 15, 2009 Report Share Posted March 15, 2009 If you guys noticed...Doesn't it look like My 2 character's pics look alike? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ragnarok1945 Posted March 15, 2009 Report Share Posted March 15, 2009 only a little bit, what are you getting at? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silent Omega Posted March 15, 2009 Report Share Posted March 15, 2009 Don't know....But In David's Bio he did say he was searching for his Brother Alex..Hence my 1st character... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ragnarok1945 Posted March 15, 2009 Report Share Posted March 15, 2009 yeah I know. First off when they meet we'll need to know how well they get along as brothers Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silent Omega Posted March 15, 2009 Report Share Posted March 15, 2009 Yeah ahaha Hope Fallen Hero doesn't make them fight too much.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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